Steve walked out of the cabin with his arm around Lauren. They looked awkward as they stood before the kids.
“Mummy just wants a bit of peace. So you two spend a few minutes with her, while I get the fishing gear,” Steve said.
“Can I sit on your knee?” Lucy asked.
“Come here, pumpkin.” Lauren pulled her close, and they sat in the rocking chair.
Steve felt uneasy. Lucy looked so cute with Bunkie clutched in her arms, and she was chewing on one of his ragged ears. It had been so long since the toy had been this important to Lucy. He had even thought she left him at home. He felt a tug on his arm and looked down at Chase.
“I can help, Dad,” Chase said.
Steve watched nervously as they rocked back and forward in the chair, a steel hand seeming to clench his stomach.
Chase looked on.
“Okay. The bait’s out back. You get that. I’ll get the rods.” He rubbed Chase’s head and took one last look at Lauren and Lucy rocking in the chair. They were so happy and relaxed, so why did he feel such dread? “Back in a jiffy,” he said, and ran from the deck.
Lauren rocked the chair gently backward and forward. The motion was soothing, and Lucy was almost asleep clutched to her mum.
Lauren began to hum the tune of “Mockingbird” again, a gentle sound in tune to the rocking. And then she started to sing. “Shush, little pumpkin, don’t you cry.” She rocked backward. “’Cause Daddy loves you and so do I.” They rocked forward.
“Again, again.” Lucy snuggled her head deeper into Lauren’s shoulder, her eyes closed.
Lauren stroked Lucy’s hair and as she did, her own hair became straighter, and she looked distant. The chair rocked backward. “Shush, little pumpkin, don’t say a word.” The chair rocked forward. “Mummy’s gonna wring your neck like a bird.”
Lucy giggled at the alternate words. “Mummy, that’s silly.”
The chair rocked a little faster now. Lauren pulled Lucy tight and nuzzled her hair. With a strangely predatory gesture, she breathed in Lucy’s scent. Her own hair seemed shorter, more old-fashioned, and her eyes stared blankly. The chair rocked back.
“Because it’s dead, that bird can’t sing.” It rocked forward. “So Mummy’s gonna give you a good beating.”
Lucy tried to sit up, but Lauren held her tight. “Mummy, sing the proper words,” Lucy said, the words muffled against Lauren’s chest.
The chair rocked backward. Lauren sneered down at the child, holding her so that she couldn’t move. “A beaten child would look so crass.” The chair rocked forward, and Lucy struggled but couldn’t free herself.
“So Mummy’s gonna stab your face with glass.”
Lucy could not understand why her mum was holding her so tight. The words made her want to hide, and she felt like she needed the toilet. As the chair continued to rock, she struggled to move, but Lauren held her firm. With her face pressed against Lauren’s chest, it was hard for her to breathe, and she could not cry out. Bunkie dropped from her hand onto the deck as she struggled for breath.
The chair rocked back. “Because that glass is already broke.” The chair rocked forward. “Mummy’s gonna hang you by your throat.”
Lucy’s struggles were desperate now. She fought against her mum, trying to move her mouth to get a breath of air into her aching lungs.
The chair rocked back. “If after this you’re still not dead.” It rocked forward. “Mummy’s gonna get an ax and chop off your head.”
“Damn it, Lauren.” Steve stopped the chair with his foot. His face was thunderous as he grabbed Lucy from Lauren’s arms and pulled her to him. She clung on tight to his neck, crying into his shoulder. Her sobs shook her tiny frame as he looked daggers at his wife. He was shaking, not as much as Lucy, but his anger was hard to control.
Lauren stood; as she did, her hair seemed to spring back into its normal style.
Steve shook his head. Was he going mad?
Lauren looked confused, as if she wondered what all the fuss was about. She reached a hand out to touch Lucy, but Steve pulled her away. He held her out so he could see her face and look into her sky-blue eyes, eyes so like her mum’s.
“How you doing, pumpkin?” he asked.
Lucy cried and hugged him close.
“Don’t worry. You’re safe now.” He stroked her hair and held her close as she sobbed against his shoulder. What am I going to do? His eyes watched Lauren as he held his little girl and her sobs gradually subsided. Lauren had held her so tightly that she was hurting her, and he couldn’t understand why.
Is she dangerous? I have to admit, she is. I have to keep the kids away from her. Maybe we should go home?
“I’m okay now, Daddy. I just don’t like the scary words,” Lucy whispered into his neck.
“No, sweet pea, me either, but Mum was just joking.” He kissed her nose and put her on the ground.
Chase was stood back, just off the deck. “Chase, take your sis down to the boat, but stay in sight.”
Chase nodded and waved a can at Lucy. “Come on, Pixie Face. I’ve got wormies.”
Lucy squealed and jumped off the deck, running before her brother toward the boat, all of her fears forgotten.
Steve watched the kids and then turned to Lauren. His face was red, and his anger was barely under control. “What the hell are you doing?”
Lauren stepped back at his tone. “Don’t talk to me like that. I just fell asleep.”
Steve felt his anger getting hotter and hotter as she watched him with that innocent expression on her face. It was as if she was wondering why he was angry. Wondering why he was behaving like this.
“Steve, what’s all the fuss about?” she asked, as if in answer to his thoughts.
“Fuss ... You say you were asleep. Lauren, that was mean. Those words could give her nightmares. Damn it, they could give me nightmares! And you were squeezing her too tight.” He finished and felt so tired, all his anger gone. Yet still she stared at him with that damn perplexed look.
Lauren raised a hand to her head. “We were just rocking,” she said.
“No, you weren’t. You were being mean, squeezing her, singing nasty words.”
“No, I wasn’t.”
“Damn it, Lauren, don’t lie to me.”
“I’m not.”
Her face crumpled and Steve could feel the confusion coming from her. “Maybe we should just go home and have you checked out.”
She slapped his face hard. The contact stung and pushed him back. He corrected his balance as she turned and stormed into the cabin.
“Honey, listen,” Steve said.
The door slammed closed behind her. It felt final, like he should give her some time. He stared at the closed door, and then down at the lake, where the children were throwing stones again. He looked back at the door, still closed, and walked down to the lake.
Why is she denying this? Does she really not remember? That question sent a shiver down his spine. What if she’s having a breakdown? What if she really hurts the children?
Chapter 13
Lauren sat at the table, feeling confused. Why was Steve being so mean? It just wasn’t like him. She knew she was exhausted. Every time she sat down, she fell asleep.
Did I roll and hurt Lucy?
Even if she had, it was an accident, so why was he so mean? The thoughts whirled around and around in her mind, driving her crazy as the answer was always out of reach. Like a dog chasing its tail, she never got any closer to why this was happening.
Absently, she thumbed through her recipe book. She had so looked forward to some time cooking, relaxing, and spending time with the kids. Logically, she knew the cabin had to go—she just felt that part of her parents was going with it. Was that why things were so difficult? Though she knew the stress she was under, it didn’t seem enough to cause this rift between her and Steve ... Not enough to cause the anger he had shown.
When she thought of the things he’d told her, that she had hurt Lucy, that she
looked mad, covered in sauce, and had been waving a knife around—none of it made sense, and she remembered none of it.
What is happening to me?
She got up and crossed the cabin to a wall of old photos. There were some of Lauren and Steve and the kids from previous trips, but she moved to one of an older couple, her parents. “Well, Mum, is this what it felt like?” she asked the photo.
There was no answer; she didn’t really expect one.
“If you could talk to ghosts, then talk to me now.” The silence stretched. Lauren laid her head against the photo and began to cry.
Am I going mad? Is it hereditary?
She rested against the wall, not expecting an answer but feeling comfort and a closeness to her mother that had not been there for so long. At last, she stood upright and walked out of the cabin; deep worry lines marred her forehead.
As she walked out, the sun seemed too bright. She blinked her eyes and almost walked into the chair. It seemed to draw her to it. She so wanted to sit down, but she should be cooking. She could almost hear the chair say, “Have a rest, sit down, and all will be better.” She laughed. Maybe she really was going mad. But still, she sat in the chair.
She closed her eyes and began to rock, backward and forward, backward and forward. Gradually, imperceptibly, her hair changed, straightened, and shortened. Her expression of sorrow became one of rapture as she rocked gently in the sunlight.
On the lake, Chase and Lucy dangled rods over the sides of a small wooden motor boat. One of them sat on each side, with Steve in the middle. They all wore bright yellow life jackets.
It was obvious that Chase knew what he was doing, and he was deadly serious. He had a beige canvas hat on his head, the bait close by his side. He cast out confidently into the still waters and gently reeled the line in. He was happy and relaxed, but serious.
Lucy, on the other side of the boat, was bouncing her line up and down in the water.
Chase harrumphed every time she rocked the boat and Steve was poised at her side, ready to catch her if she leaned too far out. She was busily chatting to the fish. “Here, little fishies, come and eat my wormies.”
Chase laughed and said, “I don’t think it works that way.”
“Yes, it does,” she said, bouncing the line. “Grandpa used to tell me how he charmed the samilons out of the rivers in Scotland. He said he used to tickle them as well, but fish don’t have feet, so that’s just silly.”
Chase giggled behind her, fighting to control his laughter. “It’s salmon, and when he said charmed, he didn’t mean by talking to them.”
Lucy was serious as she replied, “Mummy says Daddy talks like a real charmer, so I think that’s what he meant. Dad?”
“I’m not taking sides.” Steve winked and then looked at the bottom of the boat. “Who’s caught the most fish?”
Lucy’s eyes followed his gaze. Chase had three nice fish near him; she had none. Her lip pouted for a second, but then she smiled. “I’m letting him win. Besides, we’re not done yet.” She sidled up to Steve and whispered in his ear, “I need some magic. Can we just get some fishies for me?”
Steve had an idea, something his dad had taught him. “Bring your rod out of the water.” He took the hook, removed the worm, and placed a brightly colored spinner onto the line. This was a different type of fishing. The idea was to make the spinner move through the water like an injured fish. He would cast it at different angles and let it fall to different levels and fish, especially trout, found the spinner hard to resist.
“Wow, that’s pretty,” Lucy said, looking at the yellow and orange spinner.
Steve helped her cast the line out further from the boat, to nine o’clock, and he let the spinner stay close to the surface. Slowly, they reeled the line in and Lucy’s face dropped as he pulled it out of the water.
“Don’t worry, we will get one soon.” Steve cast the line out again and handed it to Lucy.
“One, two, three,” he counted, and together they reeled it in.
“Why the numbers?” Lucy asked as she wiggled the line a little.
Steve bit his lip to stop himself from laughing and then remembered his dad telling him that if you put a bit of slack on the line, it could encourage a fish that was following the spinner to take a bite. Maybe Lucy’s technique wouldn’t be a total disaster.
“So we know how far down the spinner is falling.”
“Oh ... why?”
Steve smiled; this was bringing back memories of his own childhood. They were good times, and he had to make sure that his own kids had good memories to look back on.
“That way we know how far down the fish are. If we catch one, we want to let the spinner sink to the same level.”
Steve reeled in again and Lucy gasped when it came out of the water without a fish.
“Dad!” Lucy said, her eyes downcast as he sent the line sailing over her head once more.
“Don’t worry. We will get there.” The spinner hit the water. “Count to five,” Steve said.
“One, two, three, four, five ... oh, can I catch a fishy now?”
“I hope so.” Steve began to reel the line in and he felt the familiar tug. “Did you feel that?”
Lucy dropped the rod and jumped in the boat. Steve had to hold her tight and reel in the fish at the same time. He started to laugh. It was good to be here.
Gradually, they brought the fish in, and Lucy helped with the net to bring it on board, turning her head as her dad finished it for her.
“Dad, no cheating,” Chase called, but he was also smiling.
“Pretty girl, pretty bait.” Steve winked at his son.
Chase stared out at the water, but Steve could see that his smile had gone. There was a slight shake to his hands. A lump formed in Steve’s throat.
Chase must have realized he was watching and he looked over, turning away quickly to avoid his dad’s eyes.
“Chase, are you okay?”
Chase nodded his head but didn’t look around.
“What is it?”
Chase turned to face him and his eyes glistened like the sunlight on the water. “Is Mum okay?” Chase asked, dropping his head and staring down at the fish in the boat.
Steve took a deep breath and looked at his son’s bowed head. He tried to answer but the words got stuck. They wouldn’t come past the lump in his throat.
Chase looked up. His face lined with worry. It cut Steve deep because for the first time in a long while, Chase looked his age. He was just a little boy, no longer trying to be brave.
Steve patted his knee and the two kids put down their rods and came to him.
“Why are you worried?” Steve asked, wondering how much they had picked up on.
Chase and Lucy shared a look.
“She seems different,” Chase said
“Sometimes I don’t think she’s Mum,” Lucy said, her big blue eyes searching her dad’s brown ones for answers.
Steve took his time deciding what to say. How could he explain to them what he could not understand himself? How could he get the words past the fear that clogged his throat and how could he protect them and the memory of their mother? None of this made any sense and for a moment, he wondered if he was the one seeing things. He was the one suffering from stress ... only if that was the case, the kids would be asking their mum what the problem was.
He let out a sigh and the words came with it. “Mum’s been under a lot of stress and she’s probably exhausted. Sometimes that can make people do funny things, but she is still your mum.”
“Will she be all right?” Lucy asked, her eyes misting with tears, her bottom lip shaking.
Steve hugged her tight. “If things aren’t better soon, we’ll take her to the doctor and she will be fine.”
Chase pulled away slightly. “Maybe you should stand up to her.”
Steve felt a little sad. That was the last thing he wanted his son to be thinking. “It’s not like that, son.”
“Maybe I should give he
r lots of kisses,” Lucy said, her eyes now hopeful.
Steve felt a stab of fear. He did not know why, but he didn’t want the kids near Lauren, especially when he was not there. It made no sense, but he knew they should keep away. “Little Lucy Lockett, I think she needs to be alone. So both of you, promise me you will give her some time.”
“Why, Dad?” Chase asked.
Steve could not think of anything to tell them without scaring them, and maybe he was being paranoid. “She just needs time. So, promise me. I mean it. Promise.”
“I promise this, if Daddy gives me a kiss,” Lucy said in her singsong voice.
Steve hugged her to him and kissed her soft, golden curls. “Chase?”
“I promise, Dad, and I’ll take care of Lucy.” Chase looked at his father for long seconds. Once more he seemed older than his years.
Steve felt a little sad. The problems with his health and his marriage had made the boy grow up too quickly. He and Lauren had to get over it for the children’s sake. Chase deserved to be carefree, to be a child. This worry he carried was too much for one so young. Steve ruffled his hair and pulled him close. He would talk to Lauren, and they would sort out their differences. They would find a way to relieve the financial pressures ... they would all be fine.
Chapter 14
Wearing a pretty patterned skirt and floral blouse, Lauren wandered around the grounds. It was a beautiful morning. The sun warmed her skin, and birds sang in the trees behind her. The tune “Mockingbird” came to her mind and she began to hum. Something about the sound disturbed her, but she couldn’t understand why. It was such a sweet song and one that Lucy loved, so why did it make her skin crawl this morning?
Shaking her head to clear the thought, she continued to hum the song, remembering the times when she had rocked Lucy to sleep as she sang the lyrics. Her little girl had loved them so much. A smile crossed her face as she remembered Lucy wearing an old ring from a Christmas cracker. It was gaudy and plastic but Lucy had been sure it was the diamond ring from the song. Lauren still had that ring. It was in her jewelry box and she would sometimes see it and remember the good times.
Daddy Won't Kill You- The Haunting in the Woods Page 6
