Once Upon a Crime (The Sisters Grimm, Book 4)

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Once Upon a Crime (The Sisters Grimm, Book 4) Page 9

by Michael Buckley


  "Genius!" Twilarose said, and then shook her head. "But the makeup is all wrong."

  Bam!

  Sabrina turned to the mirror. She looked like a geisha from outer space with white pancake makeup and silver lipstick.

  Bam!

  Now she was wearing fake vampire teeth and a beanie cap with a propeller on top.

  Bam!

  Sabrina looked down to find she was carrying a toy poodle with a diamond collar, and she herself had two purple shiners and some of her teeth had been blackened out.

  "No, maybe it's the shoes," Twilarose said.

  Moth stepped forward and waved an angry finger at Twilarose. "I am a fairy and a member of the royal court, making me your superior, so if you are quite finished with your atrocious fashion show--"

  "Atrocious?" Twilarose cried. She flicked her wrists and before anyone could stop her, they were all bound from head to toe in thick steel chains.

  "It has been a long time since the glory days of Cinderella but I'd hardly call my work atrocious."

  "Whoa, whoa, whoa!" Daphne cried. "You're Cinderella's fairy godmother?" She tried to free her hand so she could insert it in her mouth.

  "Yes, she's what made me a fashion design icon. After that dress every princess from here to Timbuktu would have killed for one of my designs… but those were the good old days," she said sadly.

  "Enough!" Moth roared as she wiggled out of the chains that bound her. "Your blabbering is wasting our time. If you don't tell us where Cobweb is I'll--"

  "There is no need for threats, Princess," a voice said from behind the curtains at the back of the store. The drapes were pulled aside and Cobweb stepped through.

  "Murderer," Moth screamed.

  "You are confused," Cobweb said. "I have killed no one!"

  "We know you did it!" Sabrina said. "We heard it straight from Oberon."

  "I am innocent," Cobweb said, slightly confused.

  Just then, there was a tremendous crash and the front door to the shop blew off its hinges. The group struggled to see what had caused the commotion. Standing in the doorway were Tony Fats and Bobby Screwball. Their magic wands were held tight in their huge hands.

  "How did you find us?" Bess cried.

  The two goons ignored her. Their eyes were trained on Mr. Hamstead.

  "You shouldn't have messed with my girl," Tony Fats said as he and his partner stepped into the store. '"Cause now, you and me… we're going to have to settle this the way we did back in Faerie."

  Tony Fats raised his wand and, with a flick of his wrist, a bolt of white-hot energy rocketed toward the group.

  Chapter 6

  Hamstead leaped out of the way and the blast missed him by inches. Unfortunately, it crashed into a rack of polyester dresses that exploded into flames. "My spring collection!" Twilarose shouted as she desperately tried to put out the fire that was melting her gowns. She stomped feverishly on a pink, hoop-skirted prom dress, completely ignoring the peril of everyone around her. In the chaos, Sabrina watched Cobweb fly out of the shop. "Forget the dresses!" she cried, as flames rapidly spread throughout the store. "Get us out of these chains."

  Twilarose turned and flicked her wand. The chains vanished, freeing the group. Unfortunately, smoke was filling the room, and Tony Fats and Bobby Screwball, who seemed to be having trouble seeing, were shooting their wands in every direction. Bobby seemed to have particularly bad aim; each blast from his wand spiraled toward a random target.

  "Now I know why they call him Bobby Screwball," Sabrina said as she rushed to rescue Puck's cocoon from a nest of smoldering feather boas. She scampered over to her family, who were hiding behind a rack of capes.

  "Where's Cobweb?" Daphne cried.

  "He got away," Sabrina said, ducking her head to avoid a blast. "We need to get out of here, too!"

  "Bess!"

  Tony Fats bellowed as he fired again. "You're my girl now and always."

  "They're blinded by the smoke! They aren't expecting any of us to fly out," Sabrina said, handing Moth Puck's cocoon. "Get him out of here."

  "My pleasure," the fairy girl said as her wings sprang from her back and lifted her off the ground. She zipped in between the fairy godfathers' wand blasts and soared out the open door to safety. With so much smoke in the air, Tony and Bobby hadn't even noticed Moth fly by.

  "Ernie, take my hand," Bess said. She reached behind her back, pushed something on her backpack, and suddenly a flame shot out that lifted her and her chubby new boyfriend right off the ground. Sabrina was stunned as she watched them rocket out of the store.

  "Uh, I want one of those," Daphne said.

  Twilarose hurried out next, stumbling over a stack of tiaras before making it to the door.

  "Our turn!" Sabrina cried. She snatched Daphne and Granny by the hand and raced across the room. By this time, Bobby and Tony seemed to have gotten wise to what was going on. Their shots came more quickly and the Grimms had to race at full speed to get to the exit. But just as they reached the door, Daphne pulled away and raced back the way they had come, scooping something off the floor and then rejoining her family.

  They tumbled out into the street, gasping for air, while Tony and Bobby continued to fire their wands obliviously inside the store. It was amazing they didn't hit each other.

  Sabrina rubbed the soot out of her eyes and scanned her surroundings. Twilarose was gone, but Sabrina spied Cobweb flying down the street. "There he is!"

  "We'll never catch him on foot," Granny said, whirling around in search of a taxi. She knocked into a woman carrying grocery bags.

  "Did you see that?" the woman cried, staring down the street at Cobweb. "That man is flying, like an angel."

  Granny nodded, reached into her handbag, and then blew forgetful dust all over the woman. Her eyes glazed over. "You had a very boring day," Granny said. "I did," the woman replied.

  "Wait a minute!" Daphne cried. She reached up and felt around in the woman's grocery bag.

  "What are you doing?" Sabrina asked, eyeing the doorway nervously. Bobby and Tony weren't going to stay in the store forever.

  "I need something… like a pumpkin," the little girl explained, then yanked out a long green zucchini. "I hope this is close enough."

  Sabrina watched Daphne place the zucchini on the ground and then take a long, thin piece of wood out of her pocket--it was Twilarose's magic wand.

  "She dropped this," the little girl explained.

  "Liebling, you have no idea how to use that," Granny said.

  "I watched her. It's all in the wrist," Daphne said.

  Daphne flicked her wrist and a bolt of energy shot out of the wand and hit the zucchini. There was a blinding flash and when Sabrina's eyes adjusted, she looked down. The zucchini was still there.

  Daphne shook the wand vigorously. "I think it needs new batteries."

  But in seconds the zucchini began to change. It grew in size and shape, morphing and twisting, creating wheels, hubcaps, headlights, and more. When the transformation was complete, the investigators were standing in front of an emerald-green car, complete with sunroof, spoiler, and whitewall tires.

  "This is incredible," Granny Relda said.

  "And it goes nicely in a salad," Daphne said, grinning. Then she glanced around and spotted the orange tomcat hovering in the doorway. "Now we need a driver."

  She waved the wand again and a blast hit the cat. It let out a surprised shriek and then, just like the zucchini, began to change its shape. In no time at all, the tabby had become a young, redheaded man wearing a black suit and a little leather cap.

  "What's your name?" Daphne said.

  "Chester," the driver said.

  "We need you to follow a flying fairy," Granny said.

  "Now there's a sentence you don't hear every day," Chester said. He pushed a button on a keychain he was holding and the car's alarm deactivated. Then he rushed to open the doors and helped everyone inside. When this was done, he hopped into the front seat and turned on the ignition
.

  "Buckle up," Chester said, slamming his foot on the gas. The car roared down the street after Cobweb.

  Chester zipped around cars and pedestrians like a professional racecar driver. Sabrina quickly fastened her seat belt and then craned her neck out the window in hopes of spotting their quarry. She didn't have to search for long. Cobweb was directly in front of them, darting in and out of traffic.

  Unfortunately as Sabrina discovered when she peeked out the rear window, they were being followed, too. Tony Fats and Bobby Screwball were flying after them.

  A blast of energy slammed into a nearby fire hydrant and Sabrina watched it explode, sending a geyser of water high into the air.

  "They're shooting at us," Daphne said.

  Chester made a quick left and then a right. He beat a couple lights but an unfortunate turn landed them right in bumper-to-bumper traffic. Cobweb soared over the cars ahead with ease. Meanwhile, Chester sat in the front seat, licking the back of his hands. Sabrina watched him. She'd almost forgotten he was a cat.

  Daphne tapped Chester on the shoulder. "Can you open the sunroof?" she asked.

  "Liebling, what are you thinking?" Granny Relda said.

  "Don't worry, Granny," Daphne replied as she took the magic wand from her pocket. "I think I'm getting the hang of this."

  When the sunroof slid open, Daphne stood up on the seat so she was halfway out of the car and sent a flash of magic toward the traffic in front of them. Cars were jerked off to the side of the road as if by some invisible force. When the way was clear, Chester stomped on the gas pedal and they were off once more.

  "You're going to get hurt," Sabrina said as she pulled Daphne back into the car.

  "You're not the boss of me," Daphne snapped.

  They raced into Times Square and came to a screeching halt when a crowd of pedestrians stepped out into the intersection. Cobweb soared over the tourists' heads, yet no one noticed. They were all too distracted by the dizzying lights and sights of Broadway. The dark fairy zipped down into a subway station and disappeared.

  "Sorry, folks, I can't take the car down there," Chester said.

  The group climbed out of the car just as Tony Fats and Bobby appeared. Hamstead had to leap out of the way of an incoming blast, which hit a stop sign instead and transformed it into a monkey. The monkey shrieked and disappeared into the crowd.

  Daphne turned on the goons and fired a return volley. It hit the fairy godfathers dead on, and in a flash their feet were encased in concrete. With their wings unable to keep the extra weight aloft, the men crashed to the ground. Their wands tumbled out of their hands and rolled into an open sewer.

  A crowd gathered around the family, stunned by what they had seen. Granny smiled nervously and reached into her handbag. Moments later the crowd had forgotten everything. When the people dispersed, Granny quickly took the magic wand from Daphne and handed it to Chester. "Would you be a dear and give this back to Twilarose?"

  Chester nodded. "Sure, can I keep the car?"

  "What are we waiting for? Cobweb is getting away!" Moth cried and raced away, down into the subway. The others hurried to follow.

  As Sabrina helped Granny Relda down the steps to the subway below, she caught glimpses of Cobweb in the busy station. He'd hidden his wings and was trying to blend in with everyone else. When they reached the bottom of the steps, she saw him remove something from his pocket and swipe it at the subway turnstile. Then he stepped through and hurried to the platform just as a train pulled into the station.

  Sabrina and Granny rushed to the turnstile, but without fare cards they were denied entry. Granny called out to Cobweb and the fairy turned to face her.

  "If you're innocent then you will have a chance to prove it when you go to trial," Granny said.

  "You fools, there is no justice in Faerie. There are no courts, no defenders. I would be tried and convicted by Titania herself. My head would be in the Hudson River by sunup."

  The subway car doors opened and Cobweb stepped inside. Helpless, the family could only watch as the train disappeared into the tunnels.

  "I will pursue him," Moth declared as her wings began to unfurl.

  "No, you won't," Granny said, taking hold of Moth's arm.

  "But he's getting away!" the fairy shouted.

  "Yes, he is," the old woman said. "And we're letting him."

  * * *

  Granny ushered everyone into a nearby coffee shop and then asked one of its employees where the closest pay phone was located. The old woman bought everyone hot chocolate and then went outside in search of the phone.

  "The old woman is a complete incompetent," Moth sneered. "We had Cobweb within our grasp and she let him go."

  "You say another bad thing about my granny and you're going to get a sock in the nose," Daphne threatened.

  Moth rolled her eyes.

  Daphne turned to Mr. Hamstead. "What does incompetent mean?"

  "She's saying that your grandmother isn't any good at her job," Hamstead replied.

  Daphne shot the fairy girl another nasty look and then turned to her hot cocoa.

  "So you don't need me with the big words, anymore?" Sabrina asked, trying not to sound too hurt.

  "I never said I didn't need you, Sabrina. I just can't count on you," the little girl answered.

  Granny returned, brushing snow off her coat. "All right, everyone, let's go," she said.

  "Where are we going?" Daphne asked.

  "To see Titania," the old woman said.

  "What?" Sabrina cried. "She tried to kill us!"

  Granny smiled. "I remember, liebling"

  * * *

  Night had fallen by the time they reached Central Park. They found the Hans Christian Andersen statue, waited while a dark-haired woman walking a little West Highland White Terrier passed out of sight, then said the magic words. As before, the Golden Egg was revealed.

  The damage to the restaurant from the night before had been cleaned up, and except for a few broken chairs in the corner, there was no sign that a disturbance had occurred at all. The place was empty except for a cat playing Irish jigs on a fiddle. Momma was behind the bar washing some glasses.

  "Good to see you, folks," she said. "Care for something to eat? The kitchen's open."

  "No, thank you," Granny said. "We're meeting Titania here."

  The woman sighed. "And I just got this place cleaned up."

  "Which Everafter are you?" Daphne asked.

  The woman smiled. "Mother Goose, in the flesh, or in this case, in the feather." Suddenly, she transformed into a large black goose with a blue bonnet on its head. Daphne clapped and the goose changed back into the woman.

  "So, you're part of the Grimm family," Momma said, as she turned back to her glasses. "I was so busy with customers I didn't get a chance to talk to you the other night. I knew Wilhelm pretty well. Nice guy. He was always trying to help. I guess it runs in the family. Veronica was the same way."

  Sabrina sat down at a nearby table. "You knew my mother?"

  Momma nodded. "Sweet lady. Helped me get into bartending school. Without her, I'd still be living at the Sunshine Hotel on the Bowery."

  "The Sunshine Hotel?" Granny asked.

  "Yeah, it's a flop house, one of those pay-by-the-day places. Real classy," Momma said sarcastically. "A few Everafters live there--the ones that can afford the rent."

  "And the others?"

  "They make do in shelters. Some of them live on the street."

  "But you're magical beings," Sabrina said. "Why would you live so hard? You don't have to."

  "Kiddo, just 'cause I can turn into a goose doesn't mean I don't have bills to pay. It ain't easy being an Everafter. None of us have identification. We can't get driver's licenses 'cause eventually people are going to notice that we aren't getting older. Getting a lease on an apartment without any credit history is impossible. Why, you can't even get a job without a social security number. Technically none of us exist. That's why Veronica was so well liked. She h
elped us find ways to work around the humans' rules. She cut the red tape when it was possible. When she disappeared, things went from bad to worse. Sad, too, as she told me she was working on a plan for us to help ourselves. She was supposed to give some big speech about it but then she disappeared."

  Just then, Titania and Mustardseed appeared. Mustardseed stood close to his mother, holding her hand. Titania's heartbreak was plain on her face. She said hello to everyone, then turned her attention to Moth. "How is my son?"

  Moth stepped forward with the cocoon. Titania took it in her hands and held it close to her face. "Get well, my son. You are needed." She handed the cocoon back to the small fairy and said, "Keep him safe."

  "Oz said you needed to speak to us," Mustardseed prompted. He was so serious and mature. Sabrina studied his face, looking for signs that he was truly Puck's brother. They shared the same mouth and nose--that was about it.

  "Yes, and this is difficult to say, but we can no longer help you solve Oberon's murder," Granny Relda said.

  "What?" Daphne cried. Even Sabrina was surprised by her grandmother's words.

  "Why?" Titania demanded.

  "We were told that Cobweb killed your husband," Granny said. "But Cobweb claims he is innocent."

  "Cobweb is lying!" Titania said.

  "Maybe so," the old woman replied. "But he also says he cannot turn himself in because he would be executed immediately." Mustardseed lowered his eyes. "So it's true," Granny said.

  "Of course it's true!" Titania screamed. "Murderers reap what they sow. That is the way of Faerie."

  "So he will not be given a trial?" Granny Relda said.

  Titania raged. "You are just like Veronica! She was always forcing her beliefs about justice on the rest of us. Cobweb killed my husband and I will oversee his execution myself!"

  "Then you can find him without our help," Granny said.

  "Veronica and I obviously share the same sense of right and wrong."

  "I have never heard such treachery," Moth cried. "Who are you to tell us how to behave?"

  "We will give him a trial," Mustardseed said quietly.

  "You are overstepping your authority!" Titania raged at her son. "I am still Queen of Faerie."

 

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