by Kiki Howell
He grabbed her arms, hard, and pulled her chest to his. She saw the flames on the candles grow to several inches high around them. The fireplace roared to life, but bent to the right as a strong wind blew through the room. She tried to concentrate on the anarchy erupting around them. Books opened. Papers flew. Herbs formed a small tornado of sorts in a bowl on the table. Bottles jumped from the shelves and shattered against the floor as he pressed his lips hard to hers.
It’s just a spell. She pushed the thought through her brain even as she tangled her hands into the hair blowing across his neck. Not being aware of them moving, he knocked her next breath out of her for a second when her back hit a wall. He seemed to breathe it in as he kissed her again. His hard body pressed against hers, thigh-to-thigh, stomach-to-stomach. Certain parts stiffened in between them. Lightheaded, the lust took over, heightened each nerve ending until they screamed for him. She needed to feel him naked against her, all his hard lines against her soft curves.
“Stop,” he wheezed as he caught her cheeks in his hands, pushed her face from his.
His eyes appeared wild, with more depth to the black and added light to the blue. She fell under the spell of such a hypnotizing array of colors. Only the chill that suddenly pervaded between them granted her a shred of sanity.
She could only shake her head. Her body remained pinned. He still held her arms tight with his large hands.
“It’s the spell, and I won’t have you that way,” he grumbled. “I want you on your own terms. Only if you truly want me back.”
She could only blink, shake her head an inch to each side. Cotton for brains, drunk or drugged, were the only terms she could come up with to explain what had come over her. But, here, she supposed she’d have to get used to the concept of being spelled too. Whatever the cause, she hated to be out of control, let alone controlled. Her anger boiled up, healed her to some blessed degree.
“My true attraction for you lets me see through the spell, the lust that overwhelmed us,” he admitted through gritted teeth. “I won’t have you unless the feelings are true.”
Her heart broke a little at the hint of sorrow in his voice.
“That you couldn’t see through the spell tells me you have no true feelings for me,” Darcaryn whispered.
“I...I don’t know what I feel. How could I?” Anger licked up her spine. The hot and violent flames warmed her neck as she broke away from him. “I’ve never had to deal with any magic, let alone some kind of fake lust cast upon me. How the hell could I know anything of what I feel? I can’t even control the power inside me yet. What is mine to control.”
A strong need to save his feelings compelled her. The misted look in his eyes, along with the broken tone in his strong, deep voice, tugged at her heart on a real, raw level. She held herself back from throwing her arms around him again by straightening out the clothes that seemed to cling to her in all the wrong places. Restricted, she felt the need to shed herself of them. She didn't trust a single feeling in her entire being right now
Luckily, a sharp knock on the door broke the whole spell over the room in an instant, just before it flew open.
“What the hell is happening in here,” Aedan yelled as he observed the destruction around the room. “I could hear things breaking, and a sound like gusts of wind blowing as I came through the last two rooms. Then the door wouldn’t open, even with my key, and I could hear your voices but not make out the words, just the seriousness of the tones. Seriously, what the hell happened in here? It looks like a tornado ripped through the place.”
All the candles had gone back to tiny flames, but broken glass, herbs, and papers littered every surface.
“I’m not doing so well with my element training,” Kyna managed to squeak out.
The words weren’t a complete lie. She, indeed, had issues with her training, thanks to some demented sex spells. Not the time to explain in full, she ignored the seize of guilt, that made her rapid heartbeat become a dull throb in her chest.
With a quick, furious glance her way, Darcaryn added, “I’d just pulled Kyna over here to protect her from the wind storm she’d accidentally created. I’ll get it cleaned up easily enough. Is there news? Why are you here?”
Without an answer, Darcaryn lifted his hands and things started to just magically right themselves.
She stood there trying to catch her breath even as she held it, waiting to hear if there was news of her aunt.
“No, no news, unfortunately” Aedan grumbled. A thousand emotions flashed through his darkened eyes. “This group, I would swear they don’t really exist. The symbols from the letters, there is nothing like them anywhere. Even trying to translate them through a variety of old symbols, nothing makes sense or matches up. It seems like they just put some scribbles on the bottom of their letters to throw everyone off.”
Aedan started to pace. He touched an object Darcaryn had fixed. A newly put back together bottle, that seconds ago had been shattered on the floor, now sat on the table in one seamless piece. Aedan ran his finger down the glass. He examined his hand, then shook his head.
“Anyway, since you asked so nicely,” Aedan sighed, his voice dripping with a furious sarcasm, “I came down to see what you think of me assembling a team of old SEAL buddies. Each are retired for whatever reason and working in similar fields of investigation and protection. I think if they were here, helping me to research and to guard, maybe we could find a lead to trail back to Kyna’s aunt. With each of us pulling in favors, combining our expertise, hopefully we could get further on this case faster.”
“That’s fine. How long before they would get here?” Darcaryn demanded.
“Not for a few days, unfortunately. They each have jobs to finish up, various loose ends to tie up first. I would give it several days before the first could arrive. At least with the money and resources Kyna’s aunt left me with, travel shouldn’t be much of an issue. Hopefully, we’ll have Kyna’s aunt back by then, but either way, they could be of some great help. Saoirse had said whatever I felt best, whatever I needed, that money was no object, of course. But, still, I wanted to get your opinion on my idea. Thought maybe there was a downside I may have overlooked. I’m a team player, Darcaryn,” Aedan lectured.
“I pray they aren’t needed, that we have her back sooner, but they could be of use. Why not? I see no downside. I’m sure those are huge favors to ask of these guys. So, thank you, Aedan.”
Darcaryn went right back to cleaning up the room, moving a few things with his hands even like any normal human being would’ve had to.
“I hope I can train Kyna hard enough that in a few days we can combine our powers into a locator spell.” Darcaryn added as he worked. “On my own, I’m getting nowhere. But, if we could channel her energy with enough control, then maybe we could pick up on something I can’t alone.”
“Why can’t we try now?” Kyna inquired, her body feeling like it was coming down from some high, still trembling even as her muscles began to relax.
“I fear we wouldn’t survive it. Remember the mess this room was just moments ago. You’re so powerful, and yet so uncontrolled,” Darcaryn answered without looking her way. Instead, he pressed his fingers repeatedly over a page in a book he’d picked up off the floor, as if he could iron out the wrinkles.
She figured he probably could, but nothing like that happened.
She looked around the now clean room, a fire creeping over her cheeks knowing it’d been their lust and power that’d truly wrecked it. With Aedan standing there, and memories of last night finally able to flood back into her brain, she felt a pervasive guilt wash over her, chill any lasting residue of heat she’d built up with Darcaryn. These two men stood before her, each powerful, each mind-numbingly sexy, in their own ways. Yet, even now, Aedan felt safe and true, while Darcaryn seemed dark and magical. These things could get to a girl, each of them, in different and dizzying ways.
“Are you sure you’re okay, Kyna?” Aedan asked, stepping toward her. “You loo
k flushed and tired.”
“I’m worried about my aunt. I don’t like this...this feeling of being out of control. Powerful, and yet helpless to find her. She’s the reason I’m here. She called for me. Then she dumped all this stuff on me and disappeared. I’m homesick. I’m angry. I want her back. I came to know more about my birth mother, yet I have no answers. I have no bloodline here to help now. No, I guess I’m not okay, but I will force myself to be.”
She stopped, looking down with a glare at nothing in particular. Scolding her weakness, she looked back up at Aedan. Sexy Aedan.
“I’m sorry. I’m tired. It’s always something here, if not my own magic and issues, then shadows and spells cast upon me. I’m just not myself, whoever the hell that is!”
She paused for a moment. Both man stared at her, their eyes heavy-lidded with concern. Their mouths frozen in firm frowns of frustration. So alike, yet so blatantly different. She wavered between them, mentally and physically. The motions made her stomach churn, yet her pulse raced. She’d kill for a stiff drink.
“I’ll be fine,” she rallied.
“You will be,” Darcaryn offered.
“You are,” Aedan countered.
“I have no choice.” She chided herself even as she allowed another glance from one man to the other. “I need to keep working with Darcaryn, to learn, so I can help locate my aunt. At least it gives me a goal, makes me feel somewhat less out of control and useless. I’ll find you when we are done for the day, Aedan. I’ll be starving by then, I’m sure.”
She wanted to say more to Aedan, to make him realize how important his staying with her last night had been, both personally and professionally. Yet, what words could she speak that wouldn’t increase the awkwardness already blanketing the room, suffocating each of them.
“Okay. I’ll go back to work then,” Aedan spoke, but made no move to leave. “I will continue to look for your aunt until I’ve exhausted every last resource available to me.”
“I know. Thank you,” she offered, knowing her words fell short of all she wanted him to understand.
He moved his right hand out as if to touch her, but pulled it back to his side and balled his fingers up into a fist before turning to the door. When he reached it, he gave her one last glance, cast Darcaryn one final glare as he grabbed edge of the doorframe.
“Keep her safe in these lessons,” Aedan threatened Darcaryn, his voice so vicious, hard and dangerous, a cold sweat broke out over her brow.
Unclenching her fingers, she wiped her forehead with a shaky hand. A chill slithered through her spine as the men stared each other down. Her dry mouth remained desperate for water. She broke the tension by grabbing for her glass.
Darcaryn didn’t verbally acknowledge Aedan. With a brief glance his way, she witnessed the wizard’s anger flash clearly in his eyes. The slamming of the door put an abrupt halt to the endless moment. She found herself once again alone with Darcaryn.
“We should get back to work,” he stated dryly. “I apologize for earlier. I should be stronger. Able to fight against the spell they seem to have cast over us. The group, I can only assume, does not want me to train you. They want to train you themselves. So, this is merely a distraction spell until they can get their hands on you.”
After a pause, he repeated again, “I should be stronger, but... I’d be lying if I didn’t admit I’m attracted to you, as I’ve already said before. I am, despite everything else, a man. I can be weak, too. I will try harder.”
Each word sounded forced, as if it physically hurt him to speak each syllable.
“And, you know what this society wants because of letters?” she asked, changing the subject. “They said they want me in a letter, to train me themselves? I guess I don’t understand how you know so much about a society that no one seems to be able to locate.”
“It’s not just the letters. I’ve also made assumptions from what they’ve done before. You have to remember, there was a time when your grandfather dealt with them, and the communication was more direct. They threatened your aunt the same way when she was growing up, so we have to infer the same as their intention for you. I mean, she practiced her gifts, but they wanted to use them. I am guessing they’d want your powers raw, to brainwash you themselves. To train you to best suit their needs. They did send a letter to say they’d found you in the States. We know they want you.”
“But, I thought my grandfather didn’t tell my aunt much, not until right before his death. And, what about my mom? I have to assume she had the same powers. Did they threaten her as well? Did she once live with this same fear? Her whole life maybe?”
“Yes, yes, and yes. You have to remember, I was a friend of your grandfather's, an apprentice of sorts, for a time before his death. A lot of this is just what he told me. Maybe some is fact and maybe some were just his fears. It’s a complicated business that finds one safer in speculation, to protect you from any possible kind of attack. We have to assume the worst. He once advised me of that.”
“Then how did my aunt get taken, now, after all this time? And, how horrible it must’ve been for my mother and my aunt to grow up with this threat. Why did my grandfather just not move them away?”
“I can’t answer all of your questions, I fear. He was a private man. An intense and driven man. He had motives I will never know or understand. And, he wasn’t exactly forthcoming about his motives, what got him in this mess with this group either. Those secrets, I fear, he took to the grave with him. But, I can’t stress how driven he was, how obsessed with money and power. He loved his family, though, in his own way. Truthfully, and I don’t want to upset you with this knowledge, your aunt was taken because she got distracted by bringing you here. She loves you that much...” he stumbled, seemed to swallow down over something he wanted to say.
After a few seconds, his gaze darting back and forth as if he were reading a script he could see in his mind, he began again. “Your aunt loved your mother with everything in her, and she understood her loss of you. She saw her through that daily pain, and I would venture to say experienced it with her as close as they were. So, when she heard the group had found you, she was in a panic like I’ve never seen before. Those emotions made her sloppy, made her act on them instead of acting with her head. You can’t fault her for that. But, you can fault your grandfather for the risks he took with this group. Risks that put his family into danger in the first place.”
Kyna felt her lungs constrict with the weight of her fault in things. Her guilt threatened to end her. Every emotion swirled, weighed, and strangled her, until she felt herself floating, going numb to survive it all.
“Stop!” Darcaryn thundered. “You have to learn to control this. You have to use every last ounce of strength you have to rein in your emotions and control your powers in order to make you the most powerful witch you can be. Only with you focused, can I train you enough that we can get your aunt back. Now, let’s get you back to focus.”
He moved to her then. She couldn’t help but to flinch when he stood just inches behind her.
“No worries. I have control over myself now. I promise to control my own urges to help you,” his voice brushed past her ear, sent a ripple effect of need coursing through her.
“Use those feelings, both of lust and fear. They’re powerful. Use that to your advantage. Merge them with your power. Now, pull that power, let it move the air around you. Control it as tightly as you can. Make it swirl around a flame of a candle without blowing it out,” he coaxed and challenged.
He distracted her in an advantageous way. Welcoming his demands, she took everything in her, that which she recognized and that which she didn’t understand, and let it flow. Her energy captured the air, moved it. With her mind clearing, she saw the invisible breeze as visible waves. She nudged them around the tiny candle flame.
“Don’t blow the flame out. With absolute control, circle the flame so it flickers, but stays lit. Continue your circle of air, and then let the flame rise, fed by your
winds rather than destroyed by it. Think of the natural cycle of nature where one element feeds another one rather than destroys it. Air breathes life into a flame, excites it.”
She did as he said. Energy built inside her the more she used it. The flame grew to several inches high and flickered inside her smooth waves of air. The beauty of the image fascinated her, mesmerized her, and inspired a sense of awe that only increased her power.
“Continue on. Grow the flame and the wind. Don’t focus on me as I move,” Darcaryn’s words grew fainter as he spoke.
She did as instructed until he came back behind her.
“Now, I’ve placed a bowl full of water and a bowl full of stones beside the candle. First, continuing your air and fire as they are, steady now, take the water in the bowl, feel it, feed it, move it up and around with your wind stream. Let it flow in a circle around your flame even as you protect it.”
Concentrating, trying not to fall prey to the mesmerizing tone of his voice flowing over her, she focused on the hot and the cold, the various temperatures that swirled inside her. She separated them somehow. Her ability to do so surprised her. The interaction of elements, inside her and out, seemed fanciful, unexplainable, and yet, undeniable. Soon, the water joined the air, meshed together to circle the flame. Water flowed, glistened as it reflected the light of the fire. Soon the whole room sparkled.
There were moments when she worried her astonishment would make the water and air douse the flame. She broke into a sweat, determined to keep everything going as it was.
“Keep it all going, but now move the stones in the other bowl into the flow. Let all of the elements shift together, feed off each other, and strengthen you as they strengthen each other. You’re so strong. It’s amazing to witness such raw ability. How you held this in all these years is what is truly unbelievable. But with your strength, I guess you can be anything you choose, fully human or fully witch at a moment’s notice.”
