by Kiki Howell
True to his word, as we passed from one area to the next, well before I could take in anything about them, there were no others. If anyone was around, they had made themselves scarce. If they were observing me, I certainly couldn’t tell.
Inside, the fierce cold and slicing winds seemed like a memory. For such wide open spaces, it was toasty warm. I was vacillating on removing the coat or not. With it on, I was stifling, but I had someplace to shrink into. With it off, I might be more comfortable, but I would also be exposed. I was absently surprised that the Una-Mor was not thrumming. Then again, I was probably vibrating enough for both of us. And, don’t ask me to discern whether it was excitement or fear, I would probably have had to say both.
When the last doors opened, I recognized the space immediately. It was from the memory, or dream, Nat had given me. It was a small consolation or comfort. I remembered then that I wanted to ask him about our relationship. I remembered too late. Before I could speak, I noticed movement from the far end of the room. My words died in my throat as I watched my father approach step by step. He looked at me, then to Nat.
“Is it?” He managed, barely above a whisper.
I felt, more than saw, Nat dip down to one knee and rise again before he spoke. “It is.”
A host of emotions played across my father’s face before he found his voice again. His gaze traded between Nat and myself multiple times as well. “Are you certain?” He asked turned toward Nat, but with his eyes on me.
“See for yourself. Only you will be able to be more certain than I.” Nat responded.
I was waffling back and forth between nervous and amused. Nothing would have prepared me for my father. He was as nervous as I was. Maybe even more so. The Dragon King was fidgeting, shifting from foot to foot in front of me. Somehow, it made it easier.
I did my best to stand still when he moved a step closer. He stared deep into my eyes, though I saw no menace or malice. What he was searching for, I wasn’t sure. I did my best not to blink as I stared into a pair of cool greys that matched my own.
When he stepped back, he remained in front of me, but turned to address Nat. “Have you checked?” He asked quietly.
“No. It was not my place. And, I knew without.”
“Knew what?” I asked abruptly. What did they want to check? I ran through all of the identifying marks that I was aware I had, coming up empty. “Checked what? What do you want to see?”
“Your Dragon-mark.” My father answered.
His laughter was loud and robust. I could only imagine the expression on my face to have caused it. “I have a Dragon-mark? Where? Why don’t I know about it?” I asked rapidly.
Once his laughter subsided to loose chuckles, he finally answered me. “Of course. Every dragon does. Because of your station, yours is harder to find.”
I was obviously inspecting my arms and hands, mentally running through the other parts of my body. I had no mark. I was suddenly disappointed. “I don’t have one. After this many hundred years, I’m sure I would know.” I announced sadly, whispering.
Tonnemar smiled softly. “My dear, sweet child. Forgive me for saying so, but I would bet a pile of gold that you are wrong. You would not know. Not unless you were looking for it, and, knew what you were trying to find.”
I tried hard not to fidget. This was it. This was the moment of truth. Was I, or wasn’t I his child? Sure, we had the same eyes, and the woman I had been shown as my mother could have passed for my twin, but that didn’t make it truth. I wanted to know just as much as I didn’t want to know. “Show me.” I managed nervously.
As I stood staring, he loosened the tie that held his hair at the nape of his neck. His fingers splayed, he ran them loosely in, up, and over his ear, flipping thick curtains of the black locks over to the opposite side. With his other hand, he reached for mine. I fisted my fingers before letting them loose, hoping they would not shake. He guided the flats of my fingers through the exposed area in his hair. “I feel nothing.” I said letting out a frustrated breath.
His head nodded under my fingers as he chuckled. “Nor should you.” He responded. “But, now look.” He ordered as he let my hand free.
Stepping fractionally closer, I leaned up on the tips of my toes. He was still too tall. He must have gathered as much. He knelt down before me, allowing me to rest back on my feet and be able to see. I could not have missed the discoloration if I had tried. The skin beneath the hair revealed a dragon’s three-talon claw, a heart within its palm. I gasped.
“It is the mark of my father’s bloodline.” He said, still kneeling.
I guess I owed him a pile of gold. Never in a million years would I have guessed that was what I was looking for, or that was where I would have found it...if I had been looking for it. He had been wise enough to show me I wouldn’t feel it, only see it when it was revealed. The question was, did I have one?
“And I... I have a mark like that?” I stuttered out.
“Are you ready to know?” Tonnemar asked.
I couldn’t answer. I stood mute before the King of the Dragons, nodding my head, fighting back tears waiting to fall for which ever answer came.
He rose slowly. I might have been mistaken, but I was pretty sure he was just as shaky as I was. After all, this would be monumental for him as well. Only Nat seemed calm, but then again, he said he knew without looking. I wanted to remember to find out how.
Nat arrived back at my side with a chair from the far edge of the room. I had not noticed him leave. “Thank you.” I muttered. A chair was a good idea.
Once I was seated, it was all I could do to remember to breathe. Contrary to his massive size, it was with the lightest touch that I felt the crown of my hair being lifted and moved aside by Tonnemar. It was an eternity. Long after my locks stopped shifting, I was still staring at his feet waiting to know.
Abruptly, my hair fell back into place. Before I could stop, my gaze jerked up to look as my head snapped back. I didn’t need to ask. Tonnemar’s face was streaked with tears. He dropped to his knees before me, overwrought with emotion. He only managed two words. “It’s you.”
Revelations
I PUSHED OUT of the chair, sprinting to a mirror across the room. No matter which way I pulled my hair, I could not see the mark. As with his, running my fingers across my scalp, I could not feel it either. Frustrated, I turned back to them, “I want to see it. I need to see it.” I announced.
Taking another mirror from the opposite wall, Nat came to my side. He held it in front of me so I could see the glass on the wall behind me to look. Again, I fought with the curtain of my hair to expose the mark. I froze when I finally caught sight of it. It was the same as Tonnemar’s.
If, as he had said, he hadn’t looked, how did he know? I searched Nat’s face, but only found vindication. “But how did you...”
“Asa.” Tonnemar called before Nat could answer.
Reaching his side, the question could wait. This was my father. “Yes?”
“Will you stay?” He asked shakily.
I didn’t know how to respond. This was only one answer to one question. There were still others. And, I had made a promise to myself. I would find who killed my mother, and become the last person they ever saw.
“For now.” I gave him the only truth I could offer.
“Then come, I will learn about you while I can. I have already missed so much.” He answered as he rose.
I half expected Nat to come with us, but he did not follow. We crossed into another room and sat together. What must have been hours were spent over questions and answers about where I had been, and how I had been found. My father’s face was a canvas for every emotion as he experienced it. I watched everything from wonder, to pride and overwhelming grief, to great joy.
I had so many questions. I fought to voice the least upsetting of them first. “Nat said he’s been looking for me since I went missing. Is that true?”
“Yes. He kept his faith that you would be found. So many of us
were overcome, and overwhelmed, by our grief at your disappearance. He had strength for all of us. I owe him everything.”
“You trust him.” I stated more than asked.
“With my life.” He answered commandingly without hesitation.
“Too many things have turned out to be false. I wanted, but didn’t want at the same time, to believe him when he said you were alive.”
He nodded in understanding. “I can only imagine.”
“I don’t know what to do.” I admitted hanging my head.
“About?” He asked softly, leaning forward.
I stared at the floor. “I am marked by another.”
“I know. Why does this distress you?”
“Because I wish to become all that I am. Nat said that somewhere, maybe here even, I have a destined mate...a true dragon mate. What if they don’t want me now? I will never get to become...” I let the rest trail off. I could hardly manage to speak it.
“I honestly don’t believe it will matter.” He said as his finger lifted my chin and I saw him shrug. “But, I can remove it if you wish. Though it will not erase the truth for me to do so.”
“You really don’t think it will matter?” I asked, fearful of the answer.
“Between true mates? No, it won’t matter. It will become part of the past like everything else that becomes part of the past before you were part of the pair.”
“But...the way he described it, made it sound as though true mates know of one another. I didn’t know. And, if they did, I ...I wasn’t here.” I lamented, fighting not to weep.
I was shocked as he patted my leg. “Trust me Asa. Trust me.”
“I want to. But, what happens when they see me? They will know. What if you are wrong? What then?” I wailed.
“Asa...” He chuckled. “I daresay he already knows. And, it didn’t matter.”
I knew my eyes were wide, and that my mouth was hanging open. I snapped it shut quickly. I needed to understand. “Tell me how...” I urged. “Tell me how they would know. How are true mates revealed?”
He was thoughtful as he watched my face. I did my best not to fidget as I waited for him to answer. “When a true dragon is born, every unmated dragon, male and female, gathers for the revelation of the child.” He began. “If the destined mate is present, their dragon form is briefly revealed. The claim is irrefutable. Then, a single drop of heart blood from the child is deposited into the hand of the mate, and from the mate to the child. No other connections are established until the new dragon comes of age.”
“So you’re saying...” I tried to put the pieces together. “My true mate knew as soon as I was marked by another.”
“Yes.”
“Then what? If it mattered they walked away? Or, if it mattered, they would track me down and sever the bond? What?” I challenged.
He rubbed the palm of his hand over his mouth and back again. “It’s not as simple as that. Could they track you? Possibly. Could they sever the bond? No. True mates are eternal. And, it is not something that can simply be replaced. We get one true mate Asa. We don’t get a substitute or a second chance.”
“But some never consummate the bond.”
His head tipped to the side and he studied me. “Why do you think that?”
I probably shouldn’t have shared someone else’s truth with the King, but it was the only frame of reference that I had. “Because, Nat said he cannot become as his dragon, because it hasn’t happened with his mate. He knows who she is, but it hasn’t happened. So...do some just walk away? Do they deny their bond? Would some rather never become fully what they are?”
His laughter was out of place. I was instantly angry because I was completely serious. “I’m not joking.” I cut his amusement short. “I want to understand this. When the time comes that my destined mate sees me, I need to know what to be prepared for, or not be prepared for. The longer I stay here, the greater the chance that they are going to see me, and I am going to have no idea what to do, or how to act, or be around them. What if they walk away?”
He stopped laughing finally. He was still amused though, I could see it on his face. “Asa, calm down. Would it help if I told you that your destined mate has seen you? They don’t care about the mark. They are not walking away. They are giving you space to learn and find your way in this world. Trust me.”
My hands flew to the sides of my face. “He has seen me? When? How? Did I see him? Are you sure?” The litany of questions rushed out. “How do you know he isn’t walking away?”
To his credit, he stood up and stepped away before the soft laughter broke loose. When he turned back, a broad smile crossed his face, but at least the chuckles had subsided. “Asa. Asa, Asa, Asa...He didn’t walk away when you went missing. You are here because he never stopped looking for you. He’s not walking away. He’s waiting.”
Fire
“WHERE’S MY STAFF?” I demanded as I jumped up from my seat. Realization smacked me hard between the eyes.
“No.” He shook his head vehemently. “You can have your staff, after you use your words.”
I spun on my heel and burst back through the doors to the open area where I had first met my father. Nat was slumped sideways in the chair where my Dragon-mark had been revealed. He jerked abruptly and rose as I rushed towards him.
Reaching him, I pounded my fist against his chest, forcing him to take a step backwards, and nearly fall back into the chair. “How could you?”
“What did I do?” He asked with his hands held up in mock surrender.
“You lied.”
“I did nothing of the sort.” He decried. “Lied about what?”
“It’s you! I mean, it’s me. I’m the her.” I answered making no sense even to my own ears.
I knew without turning that my father was standing in the doorway behind me. Was he apologizing? Was he signaling Nat that I knew? I watched Nat’s gaze flick back and forth between me, and the space beyond me, where I’m sure my father stood before he answered. “You hold up just one hot minute there miss. How exactly would you like me to have told you that? At what point? While you were still trying to figure out if anything was real, or the truth? While you were trying to come to terms with how this world worked, when you hadn’t even stepped foot back into it yet? Or, maybe while you were trying to wrap your pretty little head around the idea that your father was alive, and you were going to meet him?
I didn’t lie. I didn’t share every detail. Forgive me if I thought it might be too much to bear all at once. Everything I told you was the truth.
I have been looking for you for hundreds of years. I was absolutely sure that you were alive, I could feel your blood pulsing with mine. I was there when you were born- it was the moment I knew you were mine. I knew your mother. I know your father. No, I cannot call forth my other form because I have not consummated my relationship with my true mate... Because my true mate has been missing. All. Truth.” He blasted back the list of everything he had told me.
I would probably have felt like an ass if I wasn’t so furious. I couldn’t answer any of his questions about how, or when exactly, I would’ve expected him to tell me, but I was still angry that he hadn’t told me. He’d allowed me to wail and carry-on about my insecurities, all the while having the power to take them away.
“I’m so angry at you I could spit.” I announced between clenched teeth.
“Welcome to the club Asa. The way I found you? I was furious...” he paced away and back again, “furious that you were hurt, furious that you were unable to prevent it, furious at whomever had caused it, furious that I wasn’t there to keep you from harm, furious that I had not found you sooner, and furious that I had gotten close and lost you multiple times before finally finding you.” He said as he reached the far wall again. “My blood sang at the reunion and I couldn’t even acknowledge it, because I was seething.” He turned back to me glaring. “You’re angry?” he huffed, “I’m livid.” He charged back to me, coming toe to toe.
; “You’re in my space.” I growled.
“Get used to it.”
Rage
THE SOFT CLICK behind me had me turning. Nat was having none of it. He spun around with me, staying in front of me the whole way. As near as I could tell, my father had left the room and closed the door. Probably for the best. My temper was approaching epic.
“You probably want to give me some room right now Nat.” I commanded.
He barked a hard laugh. “That’s all I’ve done since I found you is give you space. Didn’t seem to work out so well for me did it? No, I think now you’re going to deal with me and we’re going to hash this out.”
“Or what?” I challenged.
The floor beneath my feet reverberated with the veracity of his growl. “This will not end like this. We can go to opposite corners, and wait for one another to cool down, but we will not leave this room this way. I’m sorry you found out as soon as you did. That was not my intention. I wanted you to have a chance to learn and understand our world before having to come to grips with that too. But, whatever the conversation with your father was, that choice was no longer mine to make. So, now we deal with it.”
“You should have told me.” I glared, my hands on my hips.
“It would have been selfish.” He countered. “Not to mention, it probably would have had you running for the hills. Oh, hi. Your name is Asa, I’ve been searching for you for hundreds of years because you are my destined mate, now let’s enter into the communion of our bond and seal the deal shall we? Oh yeah, and when were done, I’ll take you to meet your dad.” He sneered. “Like that?”
It was an exceptionally good thing that I did not have my staff. My palms were twitchy to unsheathe the Una-Mor and watch the snide, mocking look slip from his face. Marching up to him, I used his tactic, getting toe to toe with him this time. “No. Not like that. But you could have given some indication. You let me blather on, voicing all my insecurities as if you were a confidant, when they were about you. You don’t find that remotely unfair or misleading? Maybe you didn’t lie. What you did, was worse. I don’t want to see you right now.”
