Like a battle of wills, the bracelet encasing my wrist draws in the anger, multiplying my shaky emotions to the extreme, pushing me to just give in and accept my ultimate fate of becoming a monster. The blue vein-like markings react on cue, seeping across my body, fighting against the sinful invader, trying to heal me, body and mind – which side my soul is on, I have no clue.
So far, the lesser of evils has won out, conquering over my unstable mental state, yet there’s no denying that the bracelet’s hold is getting stronger.
I can’t dwell on the inevitable right now. There are more important things to do than worry about what this stolen bracelet is doing to me. Ignoring it is the only solution I have right now.
Before the Zantronians made their attempt to kidnap my mother and flush me out, I had a plan, however flimsy and illogical. I was searching for any information on them and why the bracelet seems to hold such a strong allure to Garvien.
When I first saw Garvien’s ring embedded in the fiery earth after my pitiful attempt to stop him from hacking me to death, I thought that taking it would merely annoy him, after all, it was nothing more than a beautifully engraved piece of jewellery. How wrong could I have been?
I still don’t know the truth and that’s what I’m digging for, searching endlessly for an explanation behind my transformation since stupidly placing the foreign bracelet on my wrist, continuing the same search Blay was conducting when he suffered his own attack at the Zantronians hands.
I shuffle towards the overstuffed floral chair sitting in the sun-drenched corner of the room and ease myself down while my trembling fingers unwrap the blanketed bundle I’ve kept hidden like my last remaining hope.
The small, aged, leather-bound book falls free followed by two grainy photos that appear to be very old. I don’t recognise any of the people in the first photo I look at, two women and five men, all who look not too much older than me, huddled together, smiling for the camera as they celebrate some unseen festivities. They all look like normal people, nothing distinguishable about them – they could be Prytorian or Human, for that matter.
I pick up the second photo, skimming over it, not holding any hope that it will be beneficial to me in any way. Once again, I don’t recognise the two men who stand tall, side by side, face’s stoic, bodies encased in leather armoured clothing and swords in their bulky fists, although there is something vaguely familiar about them.
Glancing at the group photo again I see the two men appear there, although looking several years younger than in the second shot. The men’s expressions have darkened to match their coal-black hair, unknown years chasing away the casual joy, being replaced by steely determination, strength mirrored in their squinted tawny eyes and hard-set jaws.
I wonder who they are, what made them lose their youthful ease and more importantly why their photos have been hidden away with a fragile, ancient book in the queen’s library.
Flipping the photo over, I see faint scrawled handwriting, the ink faded so that the words are hard to distinguish. Squinting, I hold the photo closer to the window, casting enough light to show what I think says, ‘Lonix Princes’.
Surprised, I look closer at the two men, searching their faces to find any similarities to the princes of today. The resemblances are few, but there nonetheless. The hardened gaze in their tawny eyes reminds me of one prince in particular.
Slipping the photos into the back of the book, I flick to the first page, taken aback to see elaborately graceful handwriting in jet black ink, no words faded against the thick, creamy paper even after what must be many years since it was written.
My lungs freeze as I get lost in the unknown writer's words, being drawn in completely as I go.
There will come a time when my words will need to be spoken, a truth which has long ago been forgotten, buried deep and hidden away in an act of shame. We cannot escape this truth forever, cannot deny that we are the ones who caused this curse to eventuate and therefore we must be the ones to rectify it in the end.
The mystifying page comes to an end, throwing up so many questions and answering none. What truth could the writer be speaking of? Which curse plagued them and how did they cause it?
I’m desperate to read more, to unravel the truth which eludes me even as it’s hinted at, but before I can read another sentence, a knock at the door brings me to a halt.
I move quickly, rewrapping my prized possessions, and tucking the bundle behind the armchair, out of sight. I don’t have time to make it back into bed and pretend like I haven’t moved, so I just sit there, glaring daggers towards the door as it pushes open, slightly startled to see that it’s Calasis and Ellestra who casually walk through.
Memories of the last time I saw them flash through my mind, images of when I was cut open, bleeding out on the castle floor as I screamed abuse at any who dared to come near me and stand in my way of getting back to Blay, to stop Garvien while I had the fleeting chance.
They had seen me, witnessed the oddity of the blue lights running across my skin, and since then they have been kept away, distanced from me in an attempt to what – protect me or them?
I certainly didn’t expect to see them now, and as they come to stand opposite me, barely moving as they take in my hunched form, I don’t know what to say, how to explain myself for the actions that have ultimately cost them their brother.
My eyes remain downcast, a million excuses running through my mind, anything to stop myself from admitting the harrowing truth. I am a monster. I was one even before the Zantronians took me. My selfish self-preservation has proven that time and time again.
I fill my lungs with the vanilla scented air which coats this expansive bedroom, trying to breathe in the courage I need to come clean, because Calasis and Ellestra are my friends – or at least they were once – and they deserve the truth.
“How are you feeling?” Ellestra fills the silence with her soft childlike voice.
I bring myself to look at her, to meet her eyes, expecting to see a certain level of distrust, if not crucifying hatred. Instead, her dark brown eyes are filled with warmth, concern seeping out of her, showing her true, kind, Prytorian nature.
“I’m okay,” I say hesitantly, my hands twisting together as anxiety rears up.
“Well, you do look a hell of a lot better than the last time we saw you.” Calasis sends one of his lopsided smiles my way, although his effortless charm is stuttered for the first time since I’ve met him.
I shrug, unsure of what to say, how to mend what has been broken so completely. Suddenly I feel so tired; my muscles soft like wobbly jelly, my mind unravelling fast. All I want to do is hide away, retreat to the little cottage I found in the woods and pretend like none of this is happening. The energy I’m using just to keep up this ruse is incredibly draining. I can’t continue with this pretence that everything is alright when it so obviously isn’t.
“I’m sorry.” My face falls, the façade dropping away as I open my mouth and spill out the words which I have kept hidden for so long.
“This is all my fault, I did this, brought this pain and fear to you all. If I hadn’t have come here, if I had of died on Zantron then nothing bad would have happened to any of you. Blay would be safe, the Zantronians wouldn’t have increased their attacks on Prytora, you wouldn’t know the truth.”
“We still don’t know the truth,” Calasis interrupts, taking me by surprise, his voice not holding the grudge that it should. “But we want to, we need to know the full story if we have any shot of getting Blay back, and I have a feeling you know far more than the rest of us do right now.”
Calasis steps forward, his broad shoulders rigid as he kneels before me, his warm hand resting against mine while his intense hazel eyes bore into my face.
“Finding you on Zantron, bringing you into our home and healing you was not a mistake. Having the opportunity to save your life was the best outcome we have had in our war against them in so many years. You are never to think otherwise – do you under
stand me, Rayna?” Calasis’s words work their way into my heart, trying to ease the burden which I have allowed myself to be crushed beneath.
“You did not cause this hatred between our kinds, it has been festering since the beginning of time. This is not your doing, but I do believe you might just have the answer that we need to overcome it.”
My lips part, yet no words escape – how can they when I have no idea what to say.
“Will you help us, Rayna?”
Chapter Three
“This is dangerous, Rayna.” Zaneth once again tries to persuade me, using his imposing structure to loom above my hunched over, pain wracked body as a sign of authority. “You don’t understand the strength of the Jalooniem. There are serious implications with its use.”
“I’ve seen first-hand what it can do, Zaneth.” I match his level gaze, not backing down, no longer affected by his hulking frame. I know he would never hurt me, and as far as intimidation goes, he will need to try a lot harder. “I’ll take any consequences that it throws at me in exchange for what it can provide.”
Calasis breaks the pink stem, sending the sweet scent of vanilla and berries wafting into the air, instantly sparking my appetite. He hesitates, the coveted stem clutched tightly in his hand, concern darkening his softly handsome face.
“Maybe Zaneth’s right, this is dangerous Rayna. You need to heal at a supported rate, you shouldn’t rush it.”
Calasis’s strong ethics are at conflict with his ultimate desire to save his brother’s life. I can sense his withdrawal from our agreement, my wellbeing playing heavily on his mind, and my heart begins to thump against my chest, genuine fear breaking through my stance. I know that I must act quickly before Karadese finds out that the three of them have broken me out of my guarded room to bring me down to the plantation, with one goal in mind.
“We had a deal, Calasis,” I keep my voice low, not letting my rising panic shine through. “If you want my help then I need to be healed completely. We don’t have time to wait, every second we sit here wasting time is another moment that Blay is closer to death. I don’t want that hanging over my head and I know you don’t either.”
I can see Zaneth glaring at him out of the corner of my eye, willing him to not give in to my demands. Too bad for him that Calasis has a wild streak and doesn’t succumb easily to authority. He passes the stem over and I have it in my mouth, sucking it dry before anyone else tries to stop me.
The instant the juice hits my tongue I feel it, the magical elements coming alive inside my mouth. A tingling heat slides down my throat, warming my chest before spreading throughout my limbs. My skin becomes electrified, the nerve endings zinging to life in a seductive dance. I can already feel my body regaining strength, the remaining injuries fading away into nothingness with my rapidly beating heart and all I can think about is more, I need more.
“Another one,” I demand as I thrust my hand at Calasis.
“No, that’s enough, Rayna.”
No? He can’t be serious. He has no idea how much I need this, none of them do. I have to be strong to join this fight and the Jalooniem gives me that strength – can’t they see that?
My newfound anger happily rises up, rushing through my bloodstream, eager to cause some destruction and wiping away any common sense. With each passing second, I feel stronger, no longer crippled by pain or inability, the sensation is intoxicatingly delicious.
I push passed Calasis, nearly knocking him over in my haste, not caring as he yells at me to stop, only seeing my salvation in the form of a sturdy shrub which seems to be beckoning me forth.
Grabbing a stem, I snap it with trembling fingers, my vision blurring to a foggy red at the edges, solely focused on the pleasure before me. Nothing else matters except getting the juice into my mouth. A pulling ache in my chest isn’t enough to stop the impulsiveness as I thrust the dripping stem to my lips.
The fluttering of my irregular beating heart causes my breath to catch and for a fleeting moment I question what the hell I’m doing, but the thought is soon lost to the sweet taste like no other, and I close my eyes, savouring every delectable mouthful as it drips down my throat.
The foreign rage rears up, taking hold so completely, swirling through my body, mixing with this newly added strength and before I know it I’m reaching for another stem, needing nothing more than to suck it dry, to have more and more until there is nothing left.
“Rayna stop!” Calasis yells as he reaches for me, whacking the stem from my hand in a blunt jab that intensifies my anger to boiling point.
I spin around, my hand balled into a solid fist, a scream ripping from my throat as I drive my right hook straight at him. His head snaps back with the force of my unexpected blow, his body going limp from shock, but before he falls to the floor I grab him by the throat, strength coursing through my veins as I lift him up, his feet dangling above the ground and I feel my face twist into a mask of pure hatred.
“Do not get in my way!”
His foggy gaze meets mine, his eyes widening, as he witnesses for the first time, the beginning of my transformation, which none have them have seen before.
A haunting laugh builds in my throat, escaping at the same time as my fingertips begin to mutate, letting the deadly sharp, rose-gold coloured talons grow from my fingernails, and with it comes the sensation of power which awakens all of my senses.
I am more than him, more than any of them. He is nothing compared to me and I plan to prove how feeble he is, a useless slab of meat who I could crush in an instant.
I want nothing more than to pierce his flesh with my talons, claw out his angelic hazel eyes until he bleeds tears. The anger builds, bringing with it a satisfying hunger to create misery in this creature I hold in my grasp like a baby kitten in the mouth of a lion.
My skin tingles, the blue lights desperately trying to weave across my body, trying to calm the raging fire within me. Yet they can’t advance, too strong is my hatred that the mystical magic becomes buried deep, unable to help me in my uncontrollable state.
I can do anything I want to, no one and nothing can stop me. The truth in that thought is enthralling, urging me on so completely and I greedily revel in the pain that I will cause.
My fingers dig deeper into Calasis’s throat, my talons poised to pierce his delicate flesh. It will be so easy to inflict pain upon him and bring me the joy I crave. His gurgling moans of suffocation are thrilling, filling me up with a potent desire, an almost blood-lust, so tantalisingly sensual I never want it to stop.
“Rayna!” Ellestra screams out, the terrified cry of my friend finally enough to break through the evil shroud covering my mind.
A hiss escapes my lips as I pull back into myself, back into reality. My mind realising for the first time what it is I was about to do. The patchwork of blue lights break free from the dense control that inhibited them, and already they flourish across my skin, trying to douse the fire burning throughout my entire physical being.
Calasis drops to the ground with my receding strength, colour returning to his tanned cheeks even though his expression is frozen in shock.
I stumble backwards, gasping for breath as my mind happily replays my actions on a fast loop just in case I missed out on a moment of my meltdown. The talons recede back to ordinary nails, leaving no mark of their existence, happy to hibernate, allowing me to pretend like they were never really there in the first place.
“I’m sorry,” the barely audible words slip from my lips, words that I seem to be uttering far too often lately.
Ellestra steps to Calasis’s side as he rubs at his throat, coughing heavily trying to regain his breath, her wide eyes bouncing from him to me, incomprehension fighting with reality.
“What was that? What happened?” her quivering voice tries to hide her bewilderment, still not certain that I’m back to myself yet.
Zaneth doesn’t wait for me to make excuses; taking control of the situation he speaks for me, the partial truth rolling off his tongue
like honey.
“The Jalooniem is very powerful, it can create strange reactions in different individuals.”
“Yes,” Calasis eyes me wearily, his voice cracking from the force of my assault. “But nothing as extreme as that and never has it changed a person’s physical makeup.”
“It’s addictive,” Zaneth tries again.
“We know it’s addictive, Zaneth, yet it doesn’t allow a person to mutate claws! This is something else entirely.”
Zaneth reacts automatically, stepping in front of me like my own personal shield. He will stop at nothing to protect me, even from Prytora’s royalty it seems. I know it’s his job to protect me, an oath he took and has repeatedly proven, but it needs to stop, it all does.
Every part of me shudders, shaking uncontrollably deep down into my bones, a sensation I can’t stop and can barely think through. The pull of desire is still so strong, a yearning that is almost unbearable, trying desperately to convince me to ignore these fools and drink all of the Jalooniem that I can, to never stop - why would I ever want to stop?
This is not the bracelet’s doing, no this is something completely different than I’ve ever experienced before and I know now that Zaneth was right, the Jalooniem is dangerously addictive. No wonder they only allow it in small daily quantities.
“We had no way of knowing how a human would react to such a high quantity of pure Jalooniem. I warned you not to go ahead with this.” Zaneth’s gravelly voice vibrates through my suddenly aching head, draining me of the lingering increased energy and all I want to do is sit down, hide away from everyone and everything in a useless attempt to pretend that my life hasn’t somehow been majorly screwed up. But of course, there is always something standing in the way of my refuge and right now that thing is the confounding truth of the situation.
“I’m changing,” I say flatly, no longer having the energy to pretend. Stepping out from Zaneth’s shadow, I send him a defeated smile and for just a moment panic flickers across his hardened face and I’m certain he’s going to stop me, yet for some reason, he doesn’t.
Fallen Paladin (The Paladin's Curse Book 2) Page 2
