by Dannika Dark
After finding a window overlooking the courtyard on the second level, he sat down. His hands were so shaky that he couldn’t even light his cigarette, so he tossed the unlit stick onto the floor and rested his head in his hand. Now that Patrick was dead, the unknown fate of his son’s life left Shepherd confused. Would he be better off in an orphanage? Would anyone there bond with him? How would Shepherd be able to check on his welfare? Would they educate him? How long would it take before others found out about his gifts?
That part gave Shepherd nightmares. Not many kids from interbred relationships retained gifts on both sides. The wrong person could find out and use him just as Patrick had intended to. And they could be far more sadistic. They might even take him to another country.
“Thought I’d find you here.”
Shepherd jumped, so lost in his thoughts that he hadn’t heard Gem roll up.
The pink wheels on her skates had collected dirt from the floor, and when she sat down, she crossed one ankle over her knee and brushed them off. “Viktor really dropped a bomb, didn’t he?”
Shepherd pinched his bottom lip. “Yeah.”
Her violet eyes flashed up. Gem had twisted her hair into two knots on top of her head, purple strands weaving together with silver ones. She looked like a character out of an anime cartoon. “I’d give you advice, but alas, I’m a childless Mage who can’t begin to understand your dilemma. That’s not sarcasm, by the way.”
“What does Viktor expect me to do? Raise him? I can’t be the father he needs. The kid deserves better.”
Gem studied her silver nail polish before she resumed picking at the wheels on her skates. “Maybe it’s not really about what’s better... but what feels right.”
“I don’t know what it takes to be a good father,” Shepherd admitted. “I’ll fuck him up.”
She crossed her legs and then leaned back, her finger briefly touching the tiny black mole below her eye. “I know what it’s like to be in his shoes. I was... sold on the black market.”
Shepherd’s eyes flashed up. Gem rarely mentioned her childhood.
“I know what it feels like to belong to others and never yourself. Now that he’s away from Patrick, he has a chance to figure out who he is. I know he’s just a little kid, but all these life experiences are leaving an indelible mark. I don’t think anyone here expects you to be a superdad, but your son deserves to know he’s loved and isn’t just a possession. All of us love him a little bit, and in time, we’ll love him even more. But you already loved him before he was born.”
“Love ain’t enough.”
She tapped her foot in the air, the heavy skate rocking her entire leg. “Locks and bars don’t make a prison. Even a palace can be a cage. If we make Keystone a place only for business, we’ll have made our own prison. I think we need this as much as you do. We all came here for a new life, but what’s a life without family? You all are the closest thing I have to family. I don’t know what it’s like to have parents. Do you want that to be something your kid says when he’s my age?”
“We could lose him in this place. What if he falls down the stairs?”
Gem giggled, and it reminded him of little bubbles rising to the top of a champagne glass. “I think the little monkey knows how to climb without falling. I watched him climb on top of that statue by the door.”
“And you didn’t stop him? He could have been hurt.”
She pouted. “Maybe that’s your job as a father to know those things. Do you think anyone at the orphanage will pay him close attention? And what if he gets in trouble? We don’t know how they punish kids. This isn’t about giving him the perfect life. I don’t even know what that is. Maybe all we can do is just give him the best life we have to offer and hope that’s enough.”
Shepherd fought back hot tears. “What am I supposed to tell him about me? About his mother?”
Gem shrugged. “In time, the truth is always best. But for now, he doesn’t need to know all that. Maybe he just needs to know that he has a dad who would do anything to give him the best life. Viktor said we can keep him either permanently or until you choose his adoptive parents. But wouldn’t you rather him stay here than an orphanage? What if he grows up and learns you had the chance to love him but were too scared?”
Shepherd leaned to the left and rubbed his forehead.
“We’ve already voted. No one cares about giving up the money. We made the choice out of altruism. It’s up to you now. I can’t tell you what to do. All I can do is shine a little light on my own experience as an unwanted child. I used to dream about my family finding me and coming to my rescue. I didn’t care if they were perfect or rich. I just wanted someone who was willing to love me unconditionally. I never got that, Shep. Never in my whole life. Even my Creator didn’t love me. She cared for my well-being and had compassion for my plight, but I don’t know what it feels like to be loved. I thought I had that with Hooper, but now I’m not so sure even that was real.” Gem stood up and glided a few feet to the right until she touched the wall and turned around. “You’ll never have this opportunity again. Never. Once they collect him, chances of your seeing him again are slim to none. You can’t have a life with him outside these walls, but Viktor’s giving you a chance to have them within.” She skated off in a huff. “Don’t blow it!”
He leaned forward and stared at his hands. Gem always got right to the point, and her words resonated. Shepherd could never be the dad his son deserved. He didn’t know how to give hugs or read bedtime stories. That version of him died the night Maggie lost her life. But maybe the others in the house would make up for his shortcomings. Gem’s playful spirit and demonstrative personality, Viktor’s wise words and storytelling, Wyatt’s love for video games and technology, Blue’s determined spirit, Niko’s fighting skills and balanced temperament, Claude’s protective nature—each of them had something to teach the boy. Well, except for Christian and maybe Raven. Those two were fucking nuts. He still liked them, but could he trust them all? What did he really know about their past?
Before he knew it, he was downstairs, heading to his bedroom. Once inside, he squatted in front of the armoire and opened a bottom drawer with a key. There were a few items he’d bought at pawnshops, like throwing stars and a set of handcuffs. When he reached far in the back, he pulled out a brown teddy bear. It was a little misshapen from having lived in the back of the narrow drawer for over a year. Shepherd pushed the furry nose around until the face straightened out, and he stared at the only remaining memento from his past. He’d bought the stuffed animal for his unborn child years before and kept it hidden from Maggie. Shepherd had planned to give it to the baby on the day he was born, but that day had come and gone with a storm of violence. Though he’d started over with his life, he could never bring himself to let go of that bear. He used to hold it at night, pretending it was his baby. He told it his darkest secrets, then one day, he locked it up. It was the only tangible reminder of a life that could have been, of a son he’d never know.
And now all that had changed.
Shepherd held the bear by the paw and headed to Kira’s room, where the boy was sleeping. When he opened the door, a candle flickered from the draft. Kira’s bed was empty, but she’d made him a makeshift bed on the floor beside her.
Shepherd approached the pile of blankets and looked down at the napping boy. He didn’t know how long kids slept or at what age they stopped taking naps, but when the boy’s eyes became droopy after dinner, Viktor had Kira put him to bed. What did it really matter? None of them were on a set schedule.
He lifted the covers and tucked the bear inside the crook of the boy’s arm. Shepherd hadn’t been a tender man in a long time, but he felt a glimmer of his old self as he brushed the boy’s wispy hair away from his forehead.
Minutes passed. Shepherd couldn’t tear his eyes away. Just the sound of the boy’s breath and even the whistle in his nose filled Shepherd with heart-tugging emotions like he’d never experienced. He used to think the kid l
ooked a lot like Maggie, but the longer he stared, the more he saw himself. As he traced his finger around the deep scar on his son’s face, it reminded him that this kid’s first moment in this world had been marked with pain and terror. The moments after that were hollow and joyless.
A boy with no name. A boy whose first years were spent with a man who didn’t care about his wants or his happiness. Had that already scarred him more than the mark on his face? The deprivation of love, affection, toys, and even a name?
Shepherd tucked the blanket up to the bear’s chin and stroked the boy’s cheek. “Good night, Hunter.”
Chapter 29
I had concealed my necklace inside my sweater before going back inside. This was a big decision for Shepherd, and I didn’t want to draw any attention away from him. When he finally returned to the dining room, he told Viktor he wanted to raise the boy at Keystone. Whether it was temporary or permanent would remain to be seen, but he also made a big announcement that he’d named his son Hunter Moon.
“What if he doesn’t like the name?” Wyatt posed the question while adding ginger ale to his glass of wine. “What about a literary name like Sherlock?”
Shepherd swirled his glass of whiskey. “I’ll put you in the ground if you start calling him that.”
“I’m only suggesting that we could have had a vote.”
Shepherd held his glass and pointed a finger at Wyatt. “I’m warning you, Spooky.”
Blue dragged her chair to sit between Viktor and me. “I like it. Children should have strong names with meaning. He’ll grow into that name.”
“Agreed,” Viktor said, raising his glass. “A toast for our newest member of Keystone, Hunter Moon.”
“To Hunter,” we said in unison, raising our glasses.
Viktor swallowed his merlot and set down his glass. “Tonight, Christian and I will question each of you.”
Blue wrung her hands. “You’re not asking details about our past, are you?”
“Nyet. Not specific questions. As a precaution, I only want to make sure that none of you will bring harm to the boy. I have the utmost faith that I have chosen good men and women, but this will bring Shepherd the thing he needs. What thing?” he asked Gem.
“Assurance,” she answered.
Viktor nodded. “Assurance. Niko will be present for each session.”
“I’ll join him when it’s Christian’s turn,” Shepherd said, inviting no argument.
Christian folded his arms. “Now is that any way to treat a dear old friend? What’s the matter? Afraid I’m going to get thirsty in the middle of the night?”
“Friend or not, you put one fang on him, and I’ll make a necklace out of it.”
I laughed. “Why not make a set of earrings?”
Viktor cleared his throat, his eyes glazed over from the wine. “We should also have rules.”
“Like bedtime?” Claude admired his bicep as he stretched his arms. “Children should be on a schedule.”
“Nyet. I do not care if he stays up all night and sleeps all day. But he will need his own room, and I think it would be best if it’s not across the hall from the medical room. If one of you comes in injured and he sees the blood and hears the screaming, it might give him nightmares.”
Wyatt chortled. “You mean like the ones I might have of Bloody Mary sitting across the table from me?”
“I have no problem with him seeing that,” Shepherd said. “He already knows the world is full of pain. You can’t keep suffering a secret and shelter him from it. Maybe he can watch me patch someone up or watch Niko use his Healer abilities.”
“Shepherd makes a valid point,” Niko said. “This is an opportunity for him to learn about anatomy. His Relic knowledge has to do with human genetics, but he might grow up to be a gifted healer himself. We shouldn’t coddle him. He’ll also learn what it means to live among a group of people who are different from him. Blue heals by shifting, and Raven has her own unique abilities.”
Shepherd lit up a cigarette. “One rule I wanna lay down is he doesn’t leave the house without gloves on. A car ride is fine, but walking out in public isn’t.”
Blue swept her long hair behind her shoulders. “What about around the house?”
Shepherd looked across the table with hesitation. “Only if you’re careful where you leave your emotions. I don’t know how strong his talents are—if they’re like mine. I’ll have to work with him and teach him control, but that’ll take years.”
Christian smirked. “Translation: if you’re feeling randy, don’t sit in one of the public chairs and have your wet fantasy.”
“Same goes for thinking about killing someone,” Shepherd added.
Wyatt shrugged playfully. “I guess that means I won’t be able to eat at the table with you anymore.”
Shepherd pulled in a drag from his cigarette and then set it in the slim groove on the ashtray. “Most Sensors can only feel emotions on an object when it’s been recently touched, but others can feel it days or years later.”
“Maybe you should get him in the habit of wearing gloves around the house until we figure it out,” I suggested. “That way, he’ll get used to wearing them.”
Shepherd scratched his jaw. “I gotta go to a Sensor shop and find a decent pair. They sell specialty gloves that are thin and breathable. Maybe I’ll do that tomorrow.”
Everyone turned their head when a little visitor crept into the room. Hunter reached the edge of the table and rested his arms on it. You couldn’t help but notice the scar on his face, but somehow, it made him one of us.
Claude looked down at him and smiled warmly. “Hey there, sleepyhead.”
The boy’s lip twitched, but he was still waking up. His dark hair was sticking up on one side from how he’d slept on it. He reached for one of the empty glasses and started playing with the narrow stem.
Shepherd got up, rounded the table, and squatted next to him. “Hey, little man. I got some news.”
The boy kept fiddling with the glass, probably nervous that we were all watching him closely and he didn’t know why.
“Do you know what my name is?” Shepherd asked in his rough voice. “I’m Shepherd Moon. Everyone here has a name. Did you know that?”
The boy shrugged and pulled the glass closer to him.
Shepherd continued. “That tall guy next to you is Claude Valentine. And that’s Gem Laroux, Wyatt Blessing, Viktor Kazan, and Blue. See, Blue doesn’t tell us her last name, but she’s still got a name. That dirty woman over there is Raven Black. I think she’s been playing with a lot of red paint.”
The boy looked at me and giggled. Great.
“And that scary man you should never go near is Christian Poe.”
Christian smiled and gave Shepherd the finger. “Feck off.”
“And this guy here with the long hair is Niko. They all wanna know your name, but you don’t have one, do you?”
Despite him being a child of five, he comprehended the one thing that set him apart from everyone else. His ruddy cheeks and glistening eyes revealed his embarrassment.
Shepherd gently poked the boy’s arm. “But guess what? You’ve had a name all along, but bad people just kept it a secret from you. Wanna know what it is?”
A tear slipped down the boy’s cheek, and he nodded.
“Hunter Moon.”
Niko tilted his head to the side and smiled. “That is the very best name I can imagine for a boy.”
Shepherd looked as if he were struggling with something. “And I’m Shepherd Moon. We both have the same last name. Do you know what that means?”
The boy shook his head, and I glanced over at Gem, who was crying.
Shepherd’s chin quivered, and he pressed his lips into a thin line as he touched the boy’s hand. I wasn’t sure what kind of emotion transferred between them, but something undeniable was transpiring.
“I’m your real father.”
The boy spun to face Shepherd, his arm knocking the glass, which toppled and shatter
ed on the floor.
Hunter retreated several steps, terror etched in his face as he stared at the broken glass. When he wet his pants, I wanted to cry.
Claude’s nostrils flared, and he clenched his fists, forcing himself to look away.
We all knew exactly what he was thinking. No kid’s normal reaction to an accident was fear, but Hunter had received a punishment that frightened him enough to wet his pants.
“Accidents happen. No big deal. See?” Shepherd shot up to his feet, grabbed a glass, and threw it against the far wall.
We all jumped from his unexpected reaction.
Niko repeated the gesture, and before we all knew it, we were smashing our glassware on the floor, creating a mess for Kira to clean up.
By the time Wyatt had dramatically hurled his against the wall, only to tip a vase, the boy had erupted into laughter, tears still wetting his ruddy cheeks.
Shepherd scooped him up in his arms. “You’re gonna stay here from now on, Hunter. This is your new home. You don’t get in trouble for breaking things.”
Wyatt raised a finger. “Except my computers.”
Shepherd stared daggers at him. “Fuck your computers. If he does something wrong, nobody punishes him. I’ll sit down and talk to him.” Shepherd turned his attention to the kid and jerked his neck back, trying to see his face. “We got lots of games and a big yard outside. I’ll even buy you toys. Crayons, trucks, dolls, bubbles—whatever the hell you want. What do you say, little man? You wanna stay with us?”
Hunter didn’t answer. I had yet to hear him speak. But he wrapped his arms around Shepherd’s neck and whispered something in his ear.
Shepherd squeezed him tight and turned to leave the room. “Let’s go find you some pj’s. You know what pj’s are?”
Gem had her feet up in the chair, knees bent, her face buried in them. “That was the sweetest thing I’ve ever seen,” she said, sniffling and finally lifting her head.
“Patrick hurt that kid,” Claude informed us. “I could smell it. Men who hurt children should be torched from the earth.”
