“Has she been to check on my father yet today?” he asked.
I shook my head and said, “They’re going over to the funeral home after the wedding to hammer out the details.”
He made a sound in the back of his throat.
“I’m on a mission,” he said bluntly. “I looked you up. You know about this kind of stuff. I won’t be home for at least another four days. And that’s if this goes well. If this goes bad, it could be even longer.”
I looked over at Turner, whose smile was a little bit weaker now, and realized that this wasn’t going to be good news for her.
“Are you going to be able to talk to your sister in a few minutes?” I asked.
He grunted out a negative sound.
“No,” he said. “And this phone number won’t be able to be called back, either. I wasn’t even supposed to make this call. But I had to make sure.”
I understood that.
“I’ll talk to her. Make her understand.”
“Thanks,” he muttered out. “’Preciate it.”
Then he was gone.
I sighed and shoved her phone into my pocket, then crossed my arms over my chest and thought about what I would need to do.
I wouldn’t allow her to go to her mother’s funeral planning by herself.
From the sound of it, her father wouldn’t be able to offer any input, and she’d need someone there to help.
I also had to meet up with Easton at eight this evening to discuss a couple of strategies that we’d come up with on the cases that we were working on, and I couldn’t get out of that.
But I also didn’t want to leave Turner alone to wallow in her thoughts.
I’d have to ask her to come with me.
Twenty minutes later, as I explained to her what her brother had said, she’d deflated even more.
It was like a shadow of the girl that had fought with me when I’d given her that ticket just a short time ago.
We were in a small room, completely closed off from the wedding that was going on just beyond the walls, and she was lost again.
Then again, I didn’t think she’d ever been found. I’d just held her hand through the darkness, acting like a Band-Aid for just a short time.
Then she was in my arms, and she was wrapping herself around me.
I turned around and sat down on the couch that was where I’d seen the ladies getting dressed around earlier, pulling her with me.
She moved and wiggled until her dress was up around her thighs, and then straddled me as she continued to cry into my chest.
I had to tell myself not to get excited, that she wasn’t doing this because she liked me or anything, but because she was sad.
But my dick wouldn’t listen.
That was about the time that I started to count to a thousand by threes, trying to keep my cock under control.
It didn’t work, because she turned so that her mouth was pressed to my neck.
Her hands were around my back, and her knees rested on either side of my hips.
Her fingernails were digging into my back, through the crappy shirt I was wearing and making me forget how uncomfortable it was.
And her sobs were causing her to jerk back and forth on top of me.
You’re going to hell, Castiel. Get control of yourself! I ordered myself.
It didn’t work.
I was still getting hard, and harder by the second.
“I just want to forget,” she said. “Just for a little bit.”
At first, I didn’t understand what she was talking about. I was still talking to my dick and telling it to get control, and I hadn’t put much thought into how she was no longer crying anymore.
Her mouth was also pressed against my neck in a different way, and she was now actively grinding herself against me.
I was also painfully hard and very aware that she was hot and slick against me.
Fuck.
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
This wasn’t good.
This wasn’t good at all.
I really needed to put her off of my lap. Just pick her up, set her gently against the couch, and stand up. Put some distance between us and get myself under control.
But I wouldn’t leave her.
I didn’t want her to feel rejected.
Because I was most certainly not rejecting her.
I wanted her.
Painfully. Badly. Absolutely.
But I also didn’t want to be that guy that took advantage of a woman in the state that Turner was currently in. Tomorrow she might wake up, realize what she’d done, and hate herself for it. Or worse yet, hate me.
And I didn’t want her to hate me.
I was beginning to actually like her.
A lot.
I was also realizing that maybe the way my ex-wife had treated me previously had made me bitter toward women, and that wasn’t fair.
Cher had royally screwed me over and continued to do so on a monthly basis, but I couldn’t hold Cher’s sins against Turner.
“What are you thinking so hard about?” Turner asked, brushing her hands against my jaw.
Her fingernails dug slightly into my beard, scratching lightly, causing me to jut my jaw out slightly to give her better access.
“I’m thinking that this is probably a terrible idea,” I said, feeling her stiffen. “Not because I don’t want you, but because I don’t want to be that a-hole that takes advantage when he shouldn’t.”
She deflated on top of me, then leaned forward and pressed her mouth against my jaw, dropping a chaste kiss there. She moved to the skin just under my ear, and I nearly groaned when she started kissing there.
“You need to stop thinking so hard,” she suggested. “Maybe just shut that big brain of yours off and let the little head do all the thinking.”
That was the best advice I’d heard all year.
I weighed the good and the bad of what I was about to do. Tried to tell myself that having sex with her, making her forget, would make me a bad person.
But then I decided that it didn’t matter.
I knew that I was a bad person. One more act wouldn’t kill me.
And God, did I want her.
Chapter 11
My tacos arrived with a fork on the plate. I can only guess it’s there to stab taco thieves.
-Turner to Castiel
Turner
I honestly wasn’t a hundred percent sure where this newfound confidence had come from.
Maybe it was because I had nothing left to lose.
Maybe it was because I was already lost and broken that it didn’t matter whether he rejected me or not.
Not that I actually thought he’d reject me.
His attraction to me wasn’t under question right then. I mean, I could feel his want for me pressed up against the apex of my thighs. It was his willingness to do something for me that went against his moral code.
He didn’t want to take advantage of me in my current state.
Not that I blamed him.
I might not have done it either…but I was hoping that he did it for me.
He was a good guy, though, and there was definitely a question of if.
I could practically see the wheels turning in his head as he tried to decide if this was a good idea or not.
That was when I made the decision for him.
Unfolding myself up out of his lap, I crawled backward until I was standing.
His eyes stayed on me as I slowly kicked my high heels off, then went even farther to lift my dress up, gathering handfuls until it was up by my waist. Once I had it up, exposing my panties to him, I slowly hooked a finger in each side of the waistband and pushed them down my legs.
His breathing caught, and he shifted restlessly on the couch. His eyes were fixated on my thighs, and I saw the moment that the decision in his head was made.
His eyes snapped up to mine, his mouth slightly open, and he launched himself forward.
One second, I was trying to entic
e him by letting it happen slowly, and the next I was in his arms, once again straddling his thighs, and he was kissing the hell out of me.
“Oh, fuck,” he said against my lips. “I’m so going to hell.”
I laughed into his mouth.
“You’re not going to hell because you want to have sex with me,” I told him bluntly. “If you’re going to hell, it’s because of something else.”
He snorted and went back to my mouth, once again kissing me breathless.
While he did, I started wiggling back and forth on the rigid cock I could feel parting my pussy lips, rubbing myself against him for a few long seconds before I realized what I was doing.
“Shit,” I said, pulling my ass up off his lap. “I’m probably soaking your pants.”
“Fuck my pants,” he declared. “I have a change of clothes in my saddlebags.”
I snickered against his mouth, and then gasped when he tugged slightly on the top of my dress, effectively disrobing my top half in half a second flat.
My belly clenched when I realized that he’d see my breasts—my big breasts that were thankfully perky due to the surgery I’d had two years ago—but were still on the large side.
He didn’t notice my discomfort, instead bringing one large hand up to cup one breast and bringing it up to his mouth. The moment his tongue touched the tip, my eyes were closing, and I told myself to stop overanalyzing everything.
And I did…for the most part.
I wasn’t thinking about the scars that I had due to my skin reduction surgery—luckily most of those were still covered by my dress. I also wasn’t thinking about the night before. The day that I’d had, concealing my emotions. I didn’t think about anything but him. This. Right now.
“Fuck,” I breathed out shakily. “What are you doing to me?”
You know what else I didn’t think about?
The fact that I’d never done this before.
Sure, I’d kissed a boy before.
Once.
But I was always Big T, Turner Squared, who was so fat and ugly that a boy had to be dared to kiss me.
That’s right. I’d been kissed. Once. On a dare.
I hadn’t realized at the time that it’d been a dare, but the moment that I did realize it? I’d promised myself that I wouldn’t kiss another living soul unless I was sure that they felt something real for me.
And in my current predicament? I was a hundred percent sure that Castiel wanted me.
“I’m doing to you what I’ve wanted to do since you called me a jerk the day that Zee reconnected with Jubilee,” he informed me. “Seems fitting that we’re doing this on the day that they got married, yes?”
I couldn’t agree more.
A loud pounding had me backing away from Castiel, but he didn’t let my nipple go when I did, causing a sweet sting to jolt through me as well as a shot of pleasure.
“Shit,” I breathed, my hands going to his head. “Do that again.”
He bit down slightly on my nipple and caused that same sensation to once again spark through me.
When I went to repeat the order a second time, the words on my lips died as he brought one of his hands around and delved two fingers in between my pussy lips.
I froze at the foreign sensation.
I’d never, not once, been touched like that by anyone but myself.
And honestly, I wasn’t even sure that I was good at it.
It was hard to feel good about yourself when you couldn’t think about anything but how a man would never touch you this way.
And now this man, with his beautiful face, and his bearded jaw, puffy kissed lips, and his bright eyes was touching me. And he was enjoying it.
He liked it.
The hard-on pressed against my ass cheeks was proof.
He distracted me by what he was doing between my legs—which was circling my entrance with both fingers—by switching to the other breast. His hand looked obscene against the paleness of my skin where he was cupping my breast, and I felt my nipple tighten even further.
“Your tits are so beautiful,” he growled, leaning forward to lick the tip. “I’ve never in my life seen any so beautiful.”
I felt a sheen of sweat start coating my skin at his words.
“I’m not sure if you can tell,” I told him, my hands on his shoulder. “But…oh, God.”
He’d sunk two fingers inside of me, and my entire being froze at the newness.
“What can’t I tell?” he teased, moving his thumb up to my clit as he moved two fingers inside of me. Slow and sure.
I wanted to come.
So bad.
“I’m not sure,” I paused as a moan fell from my lips. “Jesus. I’m not sure if you can tell that I’m not as experienced as, sweet baby Jesus yes. Most girls. I’m not experienced like, God yes. Most girls.”
He was moving those fingers in and out of me so slowly that I wanted to beg him to speed up. But with each twist of his fingers, I’d once again get a flick of my clit.
Then there was his mouth on my breast.
I wasn’t sure what to do or where to focus my attention.
But my body directed me despite my inexperience.
I ground myself into his length, then bent forward and pressed my wet lips to his temple as I breathed through the sensations that were powering through me.
There was just so much to focus on.
His hands were rough—workingman hands. I could feel the calluses on the hand on my breast as he held me up to his mouth. The mouth that was slowly torturing my nipple one flick, nip and suck at a time.
Then there was his other hand that was between my thighs. It was busy pushing in and pulling out.
There was banging once again going on outside, and I jolted.
“It’s the sound system getting set up,” he said. “Kiss me.”
I did, bringing my mouth down to his as I lost myself in his kiss.
“Do you have a condom?” he asked, pulling back slightly so that he could see into my eyes.
I momentarily sat there, stunned.
“Umm,” I said, looking down at my dress. “No.”
My breasts were hanging out, and they were all rosy and beard burned.
My dress was still hiked up past my hips, and I could see my wetness coating his hand as he continued to fuck me with his fingers.
“I don’t either,” he said, sounding disappointed.
I looked around the room, seeing the tons and tons of gifts that Jubilee had gotten, grinning maniacally when my eyes caught on the pleasure bouquet that someone had bought for her.
“Oh!” I pointed across the room. “There!”
I was so excited that I jumped up, moaning slightly when his fingers left me.
He watched me move across the room, and I could practically feel his gaze burning into me as I walked. When I got to the bouquet, I pulled off two condoms and twirled around. When my eyes went back to him, it was to see him sucking my juices off of each of his fingers.
One by one.
Holy shit.
I swallowed hard and started back for him, this time not going to his lap but dropping down to my knees.
My hands went to each of his knees and I looked up at him as he stilled.
“I want to suck your cock,” I told him.
He leaned his head back and groaned.
“I’m worked up, baby,” he said. “You can put the condom on me…you can even give me a small lick so I slide right up inside of you to the hilt…but you’re not sucking me. Not today. I’d blow in twenty seconds, and I want to be inside of you so bad that I can barely breathe.”
His words had me flushing.
“Okay,” I said shakily, so out of my element that I didn’t know what to do first.
Seeing my worry, he leaned back all the way and then unbuckled and unzipped his jeans. Moments later he pushed his underwear down past his cock and then groaned when the monster popped free.
Good God almighty.
His pe
nis was a monster. Truly, it was big. The biggest that I’d ever seen.
And I’d seen quite a few on the porn that I’d watched.
I mean, Jesus Christ, I did that shit for a living.
There was no way in hell I hadn’t seen large ones.
But Castiel’s?
Holy hell was he big.
I licked my suddenly dry lips and stared, causing him to laugh lightly.
I looked at the condoms that’d been sitting on the couch beside his muscled thigh, then back to his cock. I did this three times before he laughed and reached for the condom.
“It’ll fit, honey,” he promised.
I must’ve given him a skeptical look because he ripped the condom open with his teeth and rested the rolled up condom at the tip of that big cock of his.
“Do you want to roll it down?” he asked.
I hadn’t touched it yet.
The idea definitely had merit, but I was worried if I touched it, I might lose my nerve.
“No,” I said, my eyes focused intently on him. “I’ll just watch.”
His eyes stayed on me as he slowly started to work the condom down over his cock.
He was right.
It did fit.
And I was honestly in awe. I didn’t think it would.
Granted, it didn’t go all the way down to the base, but it went down far enough that I was fairly sure it would still do its job.
I couldn’t stop myself from lifting a single finger and running it down from the tip to base.
He shuddered and held out his hands for me. “Get up here.”
I leaned forward and allowed him to pull me up, coming face to face with his dark, expressive eyes.
They felt like they were on fire.
I’d looked at his eyes before, of course.
But this up close and personal, I could see the striations. I could see that his eyes weren’t all the way brown or all the way green. Honestly, I wouldn’t even consider them hazel. They looked more like an oil slick in the parking lot, left behind by an old truck on the gravel. Black, brown, green, and even a slight hint of purplish blue. His eyes went lighter the closer you got to the pupil, lightening so significantly that I was surprised that I’d not seen the difference before.
Keep It Classy (The Bear Bottom Guardians MC Book 7) Page 9
