by Maris Black
“I’ll put this in your brother’s room when it’s done,” she’d said. “Is that what you want?”
I continued to tap on my cell phone screen. “Whatever.” As if it was nothing.
When I was helping Gavin pack to come to Otranto, I was relieved that I’d thought to return the shirt, secure in the knowledge that he would never discover my shameful secret. But when he found it in his drawer, he frowned and held it out to me like an accusation. “Hey, didn’t I leave this in your room?”
My heart rate went from normal to cardiac event in one second. “I don’t remember,” I lied, hoping he wouldn’t see the guilt on my face. Would he know? Was there some telltale evidence of my obsession that hadn’t come out in the wash?
He tossed it onto the stack of clothes in his suitcase. “Well, I knew how much you loved it, so I thought you might like to have it. Guess I was wrong.”
“You left it on purpose?” I spun around, unable to hide my shock. He winked, and my insides went all soft and achy, and all I wanted to do was pull him close and breathe him in. It had been so long.
So. Fucking. Long.
“Oh, that reminds me,” he said, pulling a wad of rainbow colored fabric out of one of his backpacks and tossing it to me. “Here’s your precious Pride shirt.”
“How did you—” I stared at Gavin in disbelief, hugging my favorite piece of clothing to my chest and stroking it like a long lost pet. “I thought it was gone for good. Where did you find it?”
It was his turn to shrug. “It was in my suitcase when I got to the U.K.”
“Oh.” My mind whirled. I wanted to ask him if it was in his suitcase because he’d purposely put it there, because he’d wanted to keep a piece of me close to him, but I couldn’t form the words. I just searched his face, and he searched mine, and neither of us moved.
Just when the stare-down became unbearable, Gavin cleared his throat. “Let’s go through the rest of this stuff. It’s almost time to leave.”
Giddy and confused, I’d stuffed both the hoodie and the Pride shirt into my own suitcase, and now I was just as giddy and confused as I hung them up in the closet of our dorm room. I shook my head and marveled at the realization that my brother and I were in college. Together.
My euphoria was short lived, though. As I waited for Gavin to come back from his shower, familiar doubts began to creep into my mind again— fears about what was going to happen to us now that we were reunited.
My brother was the most important thing in the world to me, the other half of my soul. He’d always been my salvation, and he knew it. What he may not have known is that sometimes it felt more like he was my curse.
CHAPTER 3
(BAIN)
WHEN GAVIN and I ventured downstairs all squeaky clean and dressed to kill, we discovered that the school had been transformed while we primped. It was a whole different world downstairs. Lights had been strung from the rafters in the coffered ceiling, though heaven knows how anyone got up there to do it. Swirling holographic lights swam on every wall and every surface, giving the impression of a music video from the 1960’s. I half expected Andy Warhol to step out of the shadows with a bikini-clad model on each arm. Instead, all I saw were students staggering around with Solo cups clutched in their hands.
As soon as we entered the ballroom, the stares began. As always, Gavin and I caught every eye as we passed, and the air was thick with whispers. It was the twins curse.
“Oh my gosh,” said a passing girl, whose drunken library whisper was obviously louder than she’d intended. “Those guys look just like the Murphy twins.” Her friend snatched her by the arm hard enough to give her whiplash, pulling her along and saving us all from what was sure to be an awkward moment. Neither of us much cared for being recognized.
“And so it begins.” Gavin smiled at me and winked, and the intimacy of it, the us-and-them insinuation, thrilled me to the core. The wall between us was gone, at least for the moment.
“There you are, Gavin. I see you finally made it back home.” I bumped his arm with my own. “You’ve been so distant I was beginning to think you’d left the real you back in England.”
“Nope, I’m the same guy who left a year ago. You won’t get rid of me that easily.”
“Good. I was afraid the English had managed to civilize you.”
He gave me a wicked grin. “Never.”
“Did you miss me?” I could have kicked myself the minute the words left my mouth. How did I get to be such a fucking idiot? Sometimes it felt as if I had soaked up all of the sappy genes in utero and left Gavin bereft of any sentimental feelings at all.
Gavin didn’t answer my question, which was not surprising. Instead he pushed ahead, elbowing a path for us through the crowd to the snack table. “Let’s see if anyone has spiked the punch. Isn’t that what they do at these functions?”
“I’ve seen them do it in those stupid teen movies, but I don’t know about real life. Come to think of it, has there even been a movie in the last twenty years where they did that? Maybe we should see if someone is handing out Molly in the bathroom instead.”
Gavin laughed, but he knew better than to think I was serious about doing drugs. “You know, we’re of legal drinking age in the UK. Maybe I could take you there for a holiday or something.”
“You want to travel overseas just so we can drink?”
“Obviously not.” He smirked and poured himself a cup of punch. “But you never visited me in all the time I was there. I thought you might like to get out and take part in life, experience a different culture for a change.”
“I’m fine with this culture, thank you very much. I don’t need to go over there and meet all of your fabulous friends and your stuck-up girlfriends who would look down their noses at me.”
He smiled. “I think the reality of what life was like for me in England is very different from the way you picture it, Bain.”
“Yeah? Well, I wouldn’t know, since you never called.”
“Now who’s losing his sense of humor?” He took a sip of his punch and swirled it around his mouth a few times.
“How is deserting your brother funny, Gavin? In whose book is that considered comedy?”
“I texted.”
“Wow. You texted. After seventeen years of being inseparable, you typed me an occasional line of bullshit. How thoughtful.”
He held the cup out to me. “Does this taste spiked to you?”
I grabbed it and took a swallow, grimacing as my mouth drew into an involuntary pucker. “Only if you consider grapefruit juice an alcoholic beverage. Yuck. It’s a good thing they have bottles of soda, because I doubt many people will be able to stomach that crap.”
“Well, these people are drinking or getting high on something.” Gavin scanned the room, taking in every detail with a cameraman’s eye. Then he sighed. “It seems like almost everyone knows each other but us. I don’t want to stand here and watch everyone else chatting and getting messed up while we’re completely sober with nothing to do. I thought you said there would be dancing.”
“I just assumed since it was in the ballroom, but apparently I was wrong. I thought parties always included dancing. Our middle school homecoming dances were actually better than this, I think.”
“Well you promised me a Cranston Shuffle, so get out there and work it.” He pushed me toward a spot of empty floor in front of the punch table. “Go on.”
“Oh, now you want to be funny?”
“I’m not being funny,” he said. “I’m serious as a heart attack. I’ve been away for a long time, and you owe me some entertainment.”
I dug my heels in and pushed back against him. “Stop it, Gavin.”
“Stop it, Gavin,” he mimicked in a high voice. As if I talked that way.
“Don’t copy me, bitch.”
“Then get out there and shake that ass. Entertain me. Our new friends need to be introduced to the Cranston Shuffle.”
“I’m not doing it, Gavin. Stop being such a
n asshole.”
He crossed his arms over his chest and scowled. “But this party is sooo boring, Bain.”
“Well, if you’re so smart, you make the plans from now on. It was your idea to come to this creepy-ass school in the first place, out here in the middle of nowhere. I didn’t even have any choice in the matter. You always treat me like a child, like I have no right to make decisions.”
“Calm down.” Gavin put his hands on my shoulders and looked me in the eyes. “Don’t be like that. I was just messing around, okay? I didn’t mean anything by it. We’re both in uncharted territory here with the college stuff, and we’re both on edge. You know why?” He paused, his lips turning up into a wicked grin. “Because we haven’t seen each other in a coon’s age.”
“Oh, God. After nine months apart, Wild Wild West is the best you can come up with for your first movie quote?” I smiled, reluctantly charmed, and took the bait anyway. My Will Smith impression was a bit rusty, but I gave it my best shot. “Well, I can see where it'd be difficult for a man of your stature to keep in touch with even half the people you know.”
Gavin graced me with a satisfied grin and let go of my shoulders. Movie quotes could fix just about anything between us. We were that easy.
I sighed. “How about we go outside and get some air? Let’s go check out that eerie looking front porch.”
“Sounds good.” Gavin led the way, even though it was my idea, and we made our way through the front room and out onto the porch.
The air outside was cooler than what I was used to, and I assumed it was the difference in altitude. I liked it, and from the rapturous expression on Gavin’s face and the way he closed his eyes and sucked in a deep breath through his nose, he felt the same.
I came to a stop beside him just outside the front door, close enough that I could feel a subtle heat coming off of his body. I could even smell his signature scent— the same one that had lingered on his forgotten hoodie. His natural scent, peppery and slightly sweet, blended with a hint of barely-there cologne. It was intoxicating, and I found myself wishing I could smell as nice as Gavin.
“Do I smell good?” I blurted.
Gavin leaned down and sniffed near my throat. “Yeah, you smell fine.” His voice was distant, as if he didn’t give a shit whether I smelled good or not, and I found myself wishing I’d never said anything. God, I was such an idiot.
Then I noticed Gavin was staring at something at the other end of the porch. I followed his gaze just in time to see a girl who was sitting on the porch rail teeter off the edge and take a nosedive into some prickly bushes.
“Damn.” Gavin winced. “She’s gonna be hurting tomorrow.”
“Yeah, especially when some drunk guy falls in on top of her and decides to take advantage of the situation.”
Gavin frowned. “God, I certainly hope not. Can you imagine how uncomfortable that would be? Thorns in the ass for days.” He craned his neck, trying in vain to get a better look into the thick bushes. “I think we should check on her, don’t you?”
“Are you serious?” My interest was piqued because my brother had never been what one might call a good Samaritan. In fact, he could be downright cruel at times, though not often with me.
We walked down the front steps and around to the spot where the girl had disappeared. Gavin peered down into the bushes, then looked at me and nodded. “Still there. Help me pull her out, will you?”
I groaned, but I reached into the bushes anyway and grabbed onto whatever I could of the girl, which ended up being a fistful of fire-engine-red curls. “Sorry about pulling your hair,” I said.
“You’re apologizing?” Gavin laughed as he hoisted her up by her legs and secured them between his arm and his body. “A sore scalp is going to be the least of her pains when she wakes up tomorrow. Let’s get her inside and find someone to take care of her.”
We carried the girl inside, trying to coordinate our movements to keep from dropping her. A group of students— two girls and two guys— were gathered in the foyer. One of the guys and one of the girls looked like goth twins, both pale with long black hair and colorful sleeve tattoos. The other girl was blond and beautiful, her hair pulled up into a loose topknot with a few tendrils framing her face. I thought I caught Gavin staring at her for just a little too long, and I disliked her instantly. As we drew closer, I recognized the other male member of the party as Drake, the pseudo-gangsta who had visited our room earlier.
“Hey,” Gavin called out. “Does anybody know this girl? She fell into the bushes by the porch, and I think she’s passed out. From the looks of the scratches on her skin, she’s going to need some ointment or something.”
Gavin and I had both sustained a few scrapes ourselves, and my arms were beginning to itch. I couldn’t imagine what the girl was going to feel like when she came to. I figured I should mention that to her friends. “She’s going to be itchy as hell when she wakes up. Those thorns are brutal.”
The blond girl rushed over to us, stepping around me to get to Gavin. The spicy-sweet scent of cloves trailed after her. “That’s our friend Neva. We were just looking for her. She’s had a little too much to drink.”
“I can see that,” Gavin said. “Maybe some of you can get her tucked safely into her room. She won’t be doing much more partying tonight.”
The effortlessly-styled bimbo bitch leaned toward Gavin and put a hand on his arm. “I’m Skyy Hahn. Thank you so much for saving Neva. You’re officially our hero tonight.”
I had two thoughts. One: Skyy liked Gavin and was already beginning to work her feminine wiles on him. Two: What the fuck was I, chopped liver? Was it so obvious I was gay that I was invisible to her? We looked almost identical, for heaven’s sake, and Miss Perfect had practically walked through me to get to Gavin.
My brother threw dignity out the window when he smiled back at her and said, “It was nothing. Always glad to help a lady in distress.”
I gagged. Silently, of course.
“Hadrian,” Skyy called over her shoulder without taking her blue eyes from Gavin’s face. “You and Drake come get Neva and take her to her room. She’s in rough shape.”
The two guys rushed to do Skyy’s bidding, hoisting the redhead out of our arms. I groaned and shook my arms out before I started clawing my wounds.
“Stop scratching, Bain,” Gavin muttered almost under his breath. “You’ll only irritate them more.”
“I can’t help it,” I whined, but I did stop scratching.
Skyy ignored our conversation and forged ahead with one of her own. One that fit her agenda. “So, what’s your name?” she asked Gavin.
Gavin chuckled, though for the life of me I couldn’t tell what he found funny. “I’m Gavin Murphy, and this is my brother Bain.”
Skyy didn’t even spare me a glance. “Nice name,” she said. “Very masculine.”
Gavin shrugged. “Thanks. Skyy is a very unusual name. Were your parents hippies or something?”
I laughed. “I’ll bet your middle name is something like Rainbow or Saffron.”
“No,” she said, turning on me with fire in her eyes. “For your information, it’s Michelle, after my mom. She died giving birth to me.”
Gavin took her shoulders in his hands and turned her to face him again. “Sorry about your mom. And please excuse my brother. He’s moody tonight, but it’s totally my fault. Normally he’s the sweetest person you’ll ever meet.”
Skyy cast a skeptical glance in my direction, then turned back to Gavin. “We’ll see. You don’t want to get on people’s bad sides around here. It’s a small school, and people talk.”
“Was that a threat?” I asked, wondering how Gavin and I had swapped personas. Suddenly he was the nice one, and I was the dick.
“No, Bain.” Gavin moved to stand between us. “I think we all need to take a step back and reintroduce ourselves. Maybe share a cup of punch?”
Skyy wrinkled her nose. “That punch is poison. Miss Carol makes it every year, and every y
ear we complain about it. I think she does it just to torture us. You’ll learn soon enough what a bitch she is.”
The black-haired girl stumbled over and leaned on me. I resisted the urge to shrug her off, realizing Gavin was right about me being moody as hell. I needed to try to get a grip on it before he ended up angry at me, so I stood stock still and allowed the strange girl to wallow on me.
“Hey you,” she said with a wink, then trained her glassy eyes on her friend. “Skyy, we need to get the twinsies a cup. We could initiate them tonight.”
Skyy shot her a look I couldn’t quite decipher, but it didn’t appear to be a positive one. “Raven, we just met them. Don’t you think we need to get to know them a little better?”
I could have told her that asking an inebriated person a logical question wasn’t a good idea, but she quickly found out for herself.
Raven waved her off with something between a snort and a laugh. “If we don’t grab them, they’ll end up with Eddie and his crew. Please don’t let that happen. They’re too cute to let go.”
“They’re also famous.” Hadrian stepped up beside us, pushing his unruly black hair from his face to reveal an enviable set of features. Strong jaw, straight nose, utterly bottomless dark eyes. “Drake just gave me the lowdown. Girls, you are looking at the sons of the novelist P.C. Murphy. We have celebrities in our midst.”
Skyy looked stunned. “Your father wrote Judge and Jury? That’s one of my favorite books.”
Raven woke from her stupor long enough to beg. “Can we have them, please?”
Skyy looked around the room, standing on tiptoe and trying to get a look into the ballroom where most of the students were milling around. “Where’s Leo? He’d have to have the final say, and I haven’t seen him all night.”
Hadrian pointed up the stairs. “He’s up in his room finishing up some editing. He did say earlier that he’d chosen a couple of new freshmen, but no names were mentioned. Drake seems to think it’s our boys here, but he’s not sure.”
