by Faith O'Shea
He could do that. He was feeling more himself every day that passed, and he was anxious to get to know his other teammates, but with her gone, he wanted the connection with her that only her parents could give him.
“Your father texted me, thanking me for the interview, and said I was welcome any time. He will be around for the weekend and I thought to take him up on it.”
“Why not. I’m beginning to think I’ll need to tell my parents about us. With your mother coming to live here, and with her knowing, I can’t expect it to stay secret. Can you wait to text Dad until I talk to them?”
“I will wait until after I pass my test. If I fail, it will not be possible anyway.”
“Thanks. Good night.”
“Good night, Allie. Until tomorrow.”
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Allie ended the call and sank down on the bed.
This was one fine kettle of fish she’d found herself in.
She stared at the phone, knowing what she had to do, wishing she could do it in person, but… she’d done this to herself. One decision had led to the next, each one leading her deeper and deeper into…
Fuck. Just get it over with.
She thumbed her contacts and hit the icon that would place the call. When her father picked up, she took a deep breath and began to tell him her story. He didn’t say a word until she was finished.
“And you think your mother and I have a strange marriage. Never thought you’d out-strange us.”
“Dad, I—”
“All kidding aside, I like him, Allie. I’ve met a lot of players in my life and he’s one of the most solid. He knows who he is, what he wants, is willing to help his teammates and doesn’t showboat. If he could just loosen up, he’d even be fun to be around.”
She had a feeling that was right around the corner, as soon as he grew comfortable in his new homeland.
“He wants to spend the day with you tomorrow. He’s taking his driver’s test, and if he passes, will drive himself down.”
“I assume I can tell your mother.”
“You’ll have to. I’m just not sure I want the world to know yet.”
“Steve was an asshole. You do know that. I never understood what you saw in him.”
She was surprised he’d connected the dots.
“He was a good time, Dad. It wasn’t really any more than that.”
That wasn’t an outright lie. She’d thought she was in love with him, sure, but that faded too quickly to have been true. It was the cheating that had blurred her thinking, screwed up her perspective. And Mateo hadn’t been wrong when he suggested she didn’t want to muddy the playing field by dating one of her charges.
“Then why the aversion to marriage?”
She found herself losing patience.
“I don’t have an aversion to marriage, I have a rule about not dating ballplayers.”
“Your rule is still in play if you skipped the dating part.”
She could hear the laugh in his voice. He was trying to be funny, but it was at her expense.
“It was a crazy thing to do. All right? I admit it. But it’s done. Now I have to find a way out of it.”
“Why?”
Cautiously, she asked, “You don’t expect me to stay in a loveless marriage, do you?”
“I’m not sure it’s as loveless as you want to believe. I know you, Allie. You never would have done this if you didn’t feel something for him. Not even for the team.”
With a pervading sense of doom, she said, “Dad, no one falls in love with one look.”
“Almost everyone does, my girl. Whether they believe it or not.”
She couldn’t deny there’d been something about Mateo that had drawn her in, a host of complex emotions. It wasn’t only the landscape of his features and body that were luring her into a trap, but a grudging respect for how he lived his life, admiration for his work ethic and determination, his willingness to help others, the spirit that thrived within. It was the steady stream of fear that was holding her back, holding her hostage to a past relationship gone sour.
She warned, “Don’t get too close.”
“Because I might get hurt? Been there, done that. Sometimes it’s worth the pain.”
Her eyes widened. He rarely made reference to her mother’s capriciousness. He’d just opened the door to a rash of unruly feelings that she refused to sort through. The one at her feet prompted her to ask, “Why did you stay so loyal?”
“Because I understand her, and I love her enough to allow for it.”
Loving that kind of tornado must have been hell.
“My life on the road was difficult for her, Allie. She is a woman who needs companionship and she was never fulfilled by being a stay-at-home mother. You won’t be fulfilled with that, either, when the time comes. Your work is your identity, your place in the world. If I had given up my job, we might have made it through, but I didn’t. Couldn’t, really. I’m just as much to blame as she is.”
How could he say that? He hadn’t gone off and left them… but then again, he did, for eight months every year.
“What makes you think she’s going to stay this time?”
“I don’t, but she always comes back, just like I do.”
Allie shook her head. She still didn’t understand, probably never would. He must have known that, because he added, “Marriage is different for everyone. There’s a reason people stay or leave, find joy or despair, connect or disengage. We both loved our family and found a way to keep it intact. It might seem dysfunctional to some, but for us it worked.”
“Periodically.”
“The love was always there. It had to be, or we wouldn’t be where we are today.”
“You’re making me dizzy. I’ll touch base when I’m back.”
“I’m looking forward to hearing all about the island. I’d love to get there for a game someday. Are you going to try to get to one while you’re there?”
“I don’t think I’ll have time, but if I can squeeze it in, yeah. I probably will.”
“Buy me a Camagüey hat will you?”
“Do you think they’d still have his shirts for sale? Do they even do that there?”
“Not sure. Go see for yourself. I love you, Allie. I’ll keep your man busy for you.”
“He’s hoping to beat you in chess.”
“Hope is a such a fragile thing.”
She chuckled and then remembered to add, “And all of this is off the record. I don’t want to read about this in the next issue.”
“You take all the fun out of being your father.”
“Bye, Dad.”
“Bye, Allie.
She kept the phone clutched in her hand, knowing she should let Mateo know she’d spilled the beans but needing a minute to distance herself again. For something that was supposed to remain confidential, the news had spiraled out to the next curve. Both their families knew now. Who’d be next? Friends? She’d already told Casey, and when she moved lock, stock and barrel into Mateo’s house for the duration, she’d have to come up with a plausible story for the rest of them. His would be more problematic. His friends were players. Chick magnets who thrived in the role.
She could not lose her heart to the Cuban.
She closed her eyes and let Beyoncé’s voice cradle something different, and the words to her song “Halo” rocked her to the core. Some of her walls had come down, so soundlessly she didn’t even know it had happened. She’d married the man. Married him. But even as she cringed at that thought, there was a heady feeling of weightlessness that was carrying her away from her past. Would his gift to her be the freedom to love again? Would he be her saving grace or her downfall?
The song had become a mantra and it never left the corners of her mind, not through the interview with the consulate, not with the government officials they met with, not at dinner. Even as they walked around the city, he was everywhere—around every corner, in the laughing faces of his countrymen, in the lovers who expressed thei
r affection so openly.
Unable to sleep after the busy day, needing a drink to regain her ambivalence, she went down to the bar close to ten. She chose a seat in the corner so she could people watch, sipped a rum concoction that was sweet and potent. She could tell that most patrons were tourists, tall and blonde, speaking many different languages. There were several that caught her eye, and smiles were exchanged but when one approached, she began measuring him against her Cuban. He was tall and handsome, with an international flair and when he spoke, he was articulate and charming.
It was when he took a seat next to her and gave her a come-on line that she grew uncomfortable. There was really nothing stopping her from flirting back. She might be married but she’d set the rules for the relationship and they didn’t include monogamy. Here, far away from anyone she knew, she could do as she wished. There’d be no harm and she’d been fighting a hormonal spike since sitting next to another man, in another bar, and it was peaking.
When Mr. Smooth offered to buy her another drink, she freaked. While gathering up her purse and cell, she said, “Thank you, but no. I’ve got to get back to my room.”
She slid off the stool and went to walk away. Martén, in his Scottish brogue, didn’t miss a beat. “I could see you there.”
She held her hand up, wiggled the finger where Mateo’s ring shone in the muted light. It had belonged to his grandfather, a pinky signet ring that had been handed down, and it had fit her. He’d put it on her finger the day they said their vows, but she’d returned it immediately following the ceremony. Knowing a wedding band was part of this charade, she’d agreed to wear it for the couple of day she was here.
“Married.”
The word hadn’t stuck in her throat like she thought it would. In fact, it sounded sincere, even to her own ears.
She all but ran out of the bar, anxious to be back in her room, wondering what the hell she was playing at. There’d been a split second that she’d almost given in, more to show herself the marriage meant nothing, but she couldn’t. Mateo had sworn he’d stay faithful, his mother was upstairs, and if she was going to fall into bed with someone, it would be with a man who set her on fire.
“Halo” came back in full rendition. And she sang it under her breath all the way up to her room. Even here, a thousand miles away, she was surrounded by the essence of his embrace.
With every mile they flew to get home, she thought about her future, and when she disembarked, she had the grave feeling she was about to break all her rules.
Jelani’s squeal got her attention. When she looked up, she saw Alec and son standing at the end of the concourse, and Jelani began to run toward them. There was a ping in her heart at their embrace, and another when the baby reached out and was transferred from one set of arms to another. She couldn’t miss the deep and abiding devotion. Loneliness seeped in. She wanted that even though she’d never admitted it to herself. It would have meant…
“Alicia. Allie.”
Stunned, the voice sending chills down her spine, she looked beyond the couple to see Mateo moving toward her, weaving his way through a throng, waiting at the curve of the exit.
And then he was there, her breath suddenly gone, her eyes filled with the appreciation of who he was.
He stopped short, within a hair’s breadth of her, unsure of what to do.
When she heard Jelani tell Alec who he was, she dropped all pretense and stepped into Mateo’s arms. He kissed her then. And she returned it, needing it more than she needed air.
After breaking free, afraid her wobbly legs wouldn’t support her if the kiss went on much longer, she asked, “What are you doing here?”
“I missed you and didn’t want to wait for the Uber to drop you off.” He bussed her lips again and said, “It has been lonely without you.”
Alec laughed. “I know what you mean, bud. When you’re married to a woman who fills a room with her personality, emptiness sets in pretty quickly when she’s gone.”
“Yes, it is like that.”
Jelani who had hold of both the baby and her husband’s hand, made the introductions. “Mateo Alvarez, new third baseman for someone’s favorite team, this is my husband Alec Cleland. He works for the FBI.”
Mateo’s expression froze. “You are here for immigrants?”
“No, that would be ICE. They won’t bother you. You’re here legally.”
“I have heard that doesn’t matter.”
“It matters. Besides you have the FBI, one of the best lawyers this side of the Mississippi, and your wife here with you. They can’t touch you.”
Mateo scanned the area, his expression suggesting he was not reassured.
Allie took his hand, and his fingers linked firmly with hers. “Let’s get out of here.”
Mateo said, “I feel like I’m back in Cuba, looking over my shoulder,” as he took her carry-on away from her.
Jelani said, “You’re not.” She began walking away with her husband, her voice carrying over to where they stood. “One of the best? This side of the Mississippi?’
Allie laughed when the experienced FBI man was almost tongue-tied in his response.
When they reached the car, Mateo opened the doors and stuffed her bag into the trunk.
“I take it you got your license. How’s the driving going?”
“Slowly finding my way around. I was late getting here because I couldn’t find the international gate and had to keep circling. I wanted to see you as soon as you came into view. You looked sad by the time I got there. Did something happen that I should be aware of?”
He’d picked up on that. Her longing must have transformed her expression. She didn’t like that he could read her so well. Going for blasé, she said, “I texted everything went fine. Nothing’s changed.”
His eyes held the burning question. “She has her exit visa?”
“She does. Now we have to finish up on this end, but she should be here within the month.”
He knew all this. She’d gone over the consensus reached by the consulate before she’d boarded the plane.
“I will sleep better when she arrives.”
As soon as he started the engine, Latin music filled the interior of the car. He immediately turned the volume down. The sheepish expression was back. “Lo siento. I get carried away when I’m alone. It brings back some things I liked about the island.”
If she closed her eyes she’d be back on the balcony, looking down at the musicians on the street outside the hotel, the couples dancing, others clapping along with the beat, others singing along. She had gotten a taste of his culture and thought it might be fun to go dancing with him. His body moving sensuously to the rhythm, her body held closely against his chest…
“Allie. I need help here.”
They were at the pay station, but he didn’t know what to do.
“Slide the ticket in the slot and it will tell you what you owe, then slide in your debit card.”
He did exactly what she’d instructed, and when the machine beeped, he extracted the card and put it back in his wallet.
When the gate arm went up, he maneuvered out of the lot, his confidence back. It was more than she’d feel given the circumstances. Within a couple of days of getting her license, she’d had a doctor’s appointment and her father had given her his car to drive. The Lincoln was as long as a boat, there were traffic sawhorses everywhere, making it hard to get around, and she’d been a wreck until she got it back to him without a scratch.
She leaned back and began to enjoy the ride.
“How did yesterday go?”
The one thing she hadn’t talked to him about was his visit to Gloucester.
He glanced over, his sunglasses hiding those penetrating eyes. She was glad she wasn’t able to fall into them.
“Your family was very nice to me.”
She sniggered. “Don’t let your guard down with my father. You are a story waiting to happen.”
“He suggested I announce everything I say here i
s off the record every time I go there.”
“Feel lucky. He doesn’t even let me get away with that.”
He glanced over, lifted his glasses so he could meet her eyes. He was smiling and she was struck once again at how stunningly gorgeous he was. There would be no shortage of female fans, a niggling worry if it came out that they were together, never mind married.
“I do feel lucky. I am here, you are back, and my mother will follow soon.”
Feeling the effect of his gaze, she lightened up and teased, “Eyes on the road, please.”
He complied, a smile on his lips. She didn’t want to know what it meant, so she shifted in her seat, and introduced a new, neutral topic.
“Cuba is a beautiful country.”
“The island, yes. The stifling life, no. Gloucester is water, beach, gulls, fish, and freedom.”
“How long did you stay?”
“Until nightfall. They asked me to stay the night, but I declined.”
“Did you get stuck answering questions about us?”
“Your mother had a few. Then it was done. She kissed my cheek when I left, welcomed me to the family.”
Ida must have liked him. She’d never gone within two feet of Steve. Always escaped to her pottery wheel when he showed up, not that Allie had brought him that often. Maybe two or three times, tops. He didn’t like family things, so she usually went alone. Little did she know at the time that he’d found other ways to entertain himself while she was there.
“What did you do when you got home?”
“I watched television. I found reruns of I Love Lucy. It’s about a Cuban band leader.”
“I know. It’s a classic show. I have to admit I haven’t seen many episodes.”
It was too slapstick for her taste. She was more into British humor. Dry and witty.
“I…binged. I very much like that word.”
“Did you like it?”
“Not especially but I couldn’t seem to turn it off.”
Her interest was piqued now. She hadn’t had time to channel surf. After dinner the night she and Jelani had arrived, the threesome stayed in the hotel lounge until closing, drinking mojitos and discussing life in the United States and baseball. Her mother-in-law was interested in her position with the Greenliners and wanted to know all about it. They stayed away from politics which was a risky proposition there. Last night… well, she’d had a lot of thinking to do after she left the bar and the Scotsman behind, and she didn’t need the distraction of background noise.
