Today, the scene from the foot of the stairs was entirely different. Now, people covered the steps, chatting freely, and spilled out the open doors onto the grandiose patio below. Small candles illuminated freshly planted lilies, which lined either side of the pathway, and torches gleamed at the entrance of the maze, where a mass of people stood. Everywhere I looked, people were moving around, an indomitable sea of black. Hundreds had turned out to mourn the loss of their king. And Janna was speaking to me as though nothing was the least bit out of the ordinary. “How many guests are here?” I murmured, feeling dizzy as I scanned the lot. My hand clenched around the bannister, fingers turning white as I felt my resolve being sapped.
Unconcerned, Janna shrugged. “Mother made all the arrangements. If I had to guess I’d say upwards of three hundred. Don’t worry; there won’t be too many people tonight. This is short notice…an intimate affair, if you will.”
I nearly choked on the air. “Three hundred isn’t a lot to you?”
“Hardly. They come from all over, to show their respect and devotion. If it weren’t so last minute you wouldn’t know what to do with yourself. Regular proceedings usually would consist of a number closer to a thousand.” She shrugged.
I bit my lip. “All of a sudden three hundred doesn’t seem so bad.”
“I thought not.” She failed to conceal a smile. “Oh, there’s James.”
Janna indicated a spot before us; indeed, he was standing amidst a group of people at the mouth of the labyrinth, immersed in conversation. There were so many bodies surrounding him, I wondered if he would even notice our presence. As we made our way toward the group, however, my fears became unfounded as the little party dispersed, hurrying off in opposite directions. James looked up. And then he stared at me.
It wasn’t a charmed sort of stare or even an uncertain one. The clingy black dress hadn’t camouflaged my inability to blend in and it certainly hadn’t transformed me into something above my typical status as the mistake he was stuck with. In fact, he didn’t seem to notice that I looked different at all. He only looked at me with eyes so empty that I half thought I may have been transparent. The way the firelight of the torches danced off my ghostly skin, I probably was.
“Lilith.” He greeted me with a formal nod.
I didn’t answer, not that he noticed; A young woman whose dark hair was piled atop her head came up and stole James’ attention. I dared look at Janna, hoping that I didn’t betray even a hint of jealousy.
“Do you know all these people?”
“Most of them.” She was casual, and I came to the conclusion that these large affairs were not planned only when tragedy struck. “Just stick with me and you’ll be alright.”
I suspected my safety wasn’t the only reason she wanted me to stay with her, but considering she was my only friend here, I was willing to oblige. “Ok, tell me now. What should I know? Any trivia questions? Should I fake an accent?”
Janna laughed. “Nobody expects you to know anything. Just play it by ear.”
I frowned. “I thought I was supposed to be keeping up appearances?”
“Playing coy will fit your part perfectly.”
Confused, I simply stared at her. “I thought my part was to act like a queen?”
Janna smiled as she walked away, leaving me to wonder why she was so amused. I, for one, didn’t much enjoy speaking in circles, though it seemed to be her specialty. I hurried after her, offering a smile to a young boy who stared at me slack-jawed as we passed. “You don’t have to act as much as you may think. A lot of your illusion is going to be rooted in how you really feel. Awe-struck by this whole place, surprised by our existence, and grateful for James to have spared you.”
I weighed her face for a moment, expecting some comedic relief, but apparently she was serious. “Exactly what part of that is supposed to be true?” I hissed.
“Well, it’s a stretch.” She admitted. “But you are awe-struck by all of this, you have to admit. Our customs and ceremonies and the way we live. You may not like them, but they still are nothing compared to what you had expected. And obviously you didn’t realize we were a real foe to you, since you were surprised when you found out the truth. And James...”
“Good luck stretching that one.” My voice dripped contempt, though it didn’t all come naturally.
“You aren’t grateful yet.” She conceded. “But you will be.” Janna was confident enough in that fact that I almost might have believed her if I didn’t know any better.
“Ok, let’s recap. I’m happy your brothers attacked when I wasn’t even doing anything to provoke them. The pain was excruciating, but it’s ok...I’m grateful that he bit me because I’ve always felt like an outcast longing to roam with the wolves. What else?”
“You’re glad he bit you because if he hadn’t you would have turned into a vampire. You hate the idea of becoming one of those cold, heartless, soulless—”
“Janna!” I interjected. “I don’t understand.”
“Oh,” She looked at me guiltily. “Right. I’ve forgotten to tell you the most important thing. You are a human. One hundred percent. Or at least, you were. You were in the woods hiking with some friends, got lost, and then found by a vampire. This vampire bit you and left you to turn. James came along, but there was no way to save you other than to bite you himself to stop the transformation. He thought it was a better fate, to spend your life as a werewolf.”
“Oh, how noble.” The venom in my voice was poorly concealed.
“That’s the spirit!” Janna looked excited now that I had seemingly caught on.
“One problem, though.”
Her face fell. “Which is...?”
“This story still involves one of your brothers—James—biting a human—that’s me. Isn’t that the reason for the whole cover up? To save Julius’ ass? Now you’re just putting James on the line.”
“Of course not! How do you think any of these people would respond to the knowledge that their king had bitten a vampire and not killed her?” She paused for emphasis, but apparently that had been rhetorical because she rushed into her own answer. “They’d think him weak.”
“Maybe he is weak!” I couldn’t help it. The lie made me angry. “He had a chance to kill me and he chose not to take it.”
“Shh!”
Janna flashed a brilliant grin at a concerned-looking man passing nearby us. She waited until the guest was out of ear shot before speaking again. “I’m not going to debate my brother’s strength of character with you. Perhaps you think James is weak, but I guarantee you there will be a few people in our midst who are desperate to prove before a large audience that they’re not. If they find out, they will be willing to do what James could not.”
“Just point me in the right direction and I’ll spare you the stress of lying to your people.” It was a poorly conceived attempt at humor.
“You’re infuriating.” Janna shook her head, though my words didn’t seem to infuriate her in the least. In fact, she looked away coolly scanning the faces of the guests as though looking for somebody.
“I’m afraid I can’t let you sabotage yourself, Lilith. I still have plans for you.” James had joined our conversation, and judging by the slight smile on his lips, was amused by the exchange between his sister and myself.
I opened my mouth, prepared to tell him exactly how I felt about his plans, but bit my tongue when a middle-aged man approached us swiftly. He walked by me without so much as a glance, and with his eyes fixed on James, swept a gallant bow.
“Matthias,” James greeted the guest wearily. But it wasn’t just his tone of voice that sounded worn out. Even on his face I could see the exhaustion, which had been clouded by my irritation with him. In all of the lies I had almost forgotten the reason we were all gathered. On top of that, James was taking on the responsibilities of leader. I almost took him for granted, but seeing the way he looked at the stooping man with unfaltering respect, I felt less inclined to give him a hard time. “
Please, that’s not necessary.” James extended a hand and pulled him from the gesture. “I’ve known you all my life.”
The man straightened up to his full, impressive height, bearing a smile on his face. He was sturdy-looking, and yet you could see by the lines on his face that he was at least twice James’ age. The silver that streaked his hair certainly gave him a wizened-yet-dignified appearance. “I’d always hoped I would live to see the day you would take the throne. I loved your father, of course, but I knew it would be you that would take on the challenges of council.” His eyes swam with some kind of misty affection. Whether that was for James or his late father I couldn’t know, but either way there was something about the man that I liked. “Oh, speaking of...” His eyes shifted to me, seeking an introduction.
“This is Lilith.” James turned to where I stood, trying to look like I belonged there. I stepped forward with an extended hand, not wanting to seem rude. The man looked at me oddly for a half moment before pulling me into a hug that crushed the air from my lungs.
After an awkward moment Matthias stepped back, appraising me with unconcealed curiosity. “The queen of tomorrow. Rumors don’t do her justice.” James laughed and I wasn’t sure if he thought that was funny or was just trying to be polite. Probably both. “I never expected this from you, James. But I’m curious to know all about this intriguing beauty of yours.” He smiled at me, and though the gesture was nice, I felt more like the puppy in the window than a human being. He was talking about me like I wasn’t there or just didn’t understand plain English.
“I’m sure Lilith would love to share her stories with everyone at dinner.” James cast me a glance from the corner of his eye.
I smiled, just before James did something that took me by surprise. Slipping his arm around my side, he pulled me into him close enough that I caught his scent—a hint of cinnamon that blended perfectly into the autumn night. His touch sent a flutter through me, like butterflies flitting through my stomach. The moment the thought crossed my mind, I remembered the girl who’d been in my shoes before, the one who I knew nothing about because I still hadn’t had the opportunity to discuss it with James. My mood darkened a shade, but I forced a smile for Matthias. “It was nice to meet you.”
His face lit up in an expression of awe, as if I had just performed some incredible act of magic. James offered him a swift nod before turning away in search of someone else. I hurried after him, not wanting to be left to the wolves. “He wasn’t expecting that.” James said, fixing me with a bemused grin.
“What is that supposed to mean?” Without anyone to perform for, I found it hard to hide my irritation with him—particularly when I was also irritated with myself for letting it bother me in the first place.
“Well, he didn’t expect someone as beautiful as you, for one thing.”
I swallowed my surprise. “Is that... a compliment?”
James turned, allowing me to search his face for any indication that he meant it. Despite the stone facade, his voice was soft. “It’s fact.”
“These people...” I ventured. “Do they all know that I’m dying?” I crossed my arms, trying to ward off the feeling of sudden exposure.
It clearly took him by surprise, and seemed to be one of the last things he wanted to discuss, as he offered no answer. I realized I’d never said it to him, and certainly not so plainly. His father had been the one to tell me my life was slipping away because James was too ashamed or cowardly or disgusted to do it. I thought he was on the verge of saying something, but instead James nudged me ever so lightly and whispered in an undertone, “Put on your happy face.”
I looked up in time to see the queen sweeping toward us, her long red curls tumbling elegantly down her back. It was the first time I had seen her since her husband’s death, and though she still looked beautiful, I could see the lines webbing around her delicate skin, an indication of her exhaustion. Stepping back, she observed me, her lips just a little less tight than I remembered, her green eyes lighter than the first day she had approached me. “You look stunning.”
For a moment, an untouched silence lay between us. Janna seemed to be attempting to send me some kind of signal over her mother’s shoulder, but whatever it was, it was going over my head. I turned to James as surreptitiously as possible, hoping his message would be a little more obvious-something more along the line of smoke stacks. All he did was smile, as if he were enjoying my discomfort. I had no doubt he was.
“Thank you.” I finally answered. This was obviously a part of the game, something else designed to trick these people into believing the lives that they saw here were truly blessed, not smoke and mirrors. But it was exceedingly difficult to play it cool when the queen hated me, Julius wanted to kill me, and James and I had barely even been able to say two full sentences to each other since our meeting. To pretend that I fit perfectly into this family was like pretending that I was normal, which I, of course, was not.
The queen disappeared into the maze after kissing her children goodbye. Janna popped up at my shoulder. “Come on, Lilith, let’s go take our seats for the ceremony.”
We walked together through the dark paths of the maze, following the outline of the torch light every couple of feet until we emerged in a large, open area crammed with chairs.
My preoccupation with not tripping became secondary as we moved towards the front, and nearly every pair of eyes turned to trail us up the aisle. The guests were packed into rows that looked too close for comfort, craning their necks around one another in an attempt to look our way. They were looking at Janna, admiring her beauty. I told myself that they didn’t even see me there and focused on the space left vacant near the front of the courtyard.
Janna led me to the very front before slipping into an empty seat next to her mother. I was grateful to be distanced from the queen—until Julius took the seat to my other side. He looked at me mildly. I wanted to ask what his problem was, but he looked away soon enough. “I shouldn’t be sitting here.” I leaned into Janna just close enough to conceal the whisper. “Look at all those people standing in the back.”
Janna turned to look at the crowd of people ringing around the outside of the chairs and leaning against the wall of the maze. She didn’t say anything. Instead, the queen spoke, leaning around her daughter to address me. “You belong here, Lilith. It’s what the king would have wanted.”
A lump formed in my throat. Thankfully I didn’t have to try and speak around it because James suddenly appeared before us. I took in the altar that he stood upon, which I’d previously paid no mind. It was like a stage, carved of the same concrete that composed the rest of the courtyard, bearing a table with a single vase, flanked by two thick candles. James stopped before this table and allowed himself a moment to look at it, reigning in the silence that had fallen at his entrance.
“Tonight is a night for joy and sorrow,” His voice was so strong and powerful that I almost didn’t believe this was the same man who’d stood before his father a week ago and professed that he’d had no choice in bringing me here. “Tonight the bitter and the sweet unite as we mourn a death, but celebrate a life.” He looked down at the ground, and I feared that he would lose himself in his sorrow until I looked to Janna and realized her head was down too. A sneaky glance at Julius revealed similar circumstances. They were bowing, I realized. I followed suit, hoping they didn’t notice my delay.
James began speaking again and I looked up to see that his head was still down, as if he was talking to the ground. He very well could have been, because his words made no sense to me. I wondered if my brain were merely unhinged with all of the events taking place, and then realized I understood nothing because he was speaking an entirely different language.
I listened carefully, attempting to decode the words based upon his body language and context. I knew enough of other languages to know it was not French, or Spanish, and unless James was making a highly inappropriate reference to the bathroom, then it wasn’t German either.
> His words may not have given me even a faint understanding of what he was speaking of, but as I listened I felt myself falling under a spell of sorts. The words which had immediately struck me as nonsensical gibberish took on new meaning, transcending vocabulary. The inflections of his tone as he enunciated words here and there began a sort of metric that offered me peace. It was almost like maybe I did belong there... Not just there in the front seat, but there as in with James. It was absurd, but the magic of his words was beginning to convince me it wasn’t.
When he finished speaking, the silence was ugly and harsh. I wished he’d keep talking. I raised my head to see goose bumps all over my arms, peeking out from under starched sleeves.
I felt fulfilled and yet I longed for him to continue. James seemed to have nothing more to say, however; He reached for the ornate vase before him and upended it. The wind caught the contents, which I realized were the King’s ashes, and scattered them through the air. A shudder racked me as James set the vase back on the table upside down, then proceeded to blow out the candles.
He said nothing more, looking out at the surrounding crowd. His eyes fell on his family in single succession. I looked down the row and saw the queen with her head still down and Janna with tears streaming down her cheeks, glinting silver in the passing light of the moon. My chest swelled with some kind of natural desire to comfort her, but upon feeling James’ eyes on me, I turned back to him.
It may have been a trick of the light, but I almost thought he smiled at me...a small, comforting sort of tip on his soft lips. Turning back to Janna, I pushed that thought away. Janna laughed. “You’re crying?” She informed me, as much a question as it was a statement.
That was what I had intended to say to her, but I put my fingers to my face and brushed away tears. I hadn’t realized they’d fallen, and hopefully neither had James.
The Celestial Kiss Page 19
