by Sienna Grant
Blake collapses onto my back, he’s breathing hard against my hard, I can feel his erratic heartbeat. “I love you, baby, did I hurt ya?” I shake my head, I’m so out of breath I can’t speak right now, I hear him chuckling, I turn my head to the side so I can see him better, “I love you too,” I smile lovingly at him then he kisses my lips softly.
“I know Princess, anything you want; It’s yours, and I’m yours, always.” He pulls out of me slowly, once he cleans us up, we dress and head back home.
BLAKE
Fuck, it was unbelievable! I knew when I saw that flush in her cheeks and her eyes hooded, just what she wanted. I never thought in a million years, she would tell me what she was thinking, though, it shows just how far she’s really come, she trusts me. She still has a lot of insecurities and confidence issues, but at least we’re getting through them slowly, and she’s getting there, I’m not that stupid to think it’s going to happen overnight, though, but little at a time is good with me.
We’re now on our way back to Lex’ flat, I’m holding her hand on her leg, I look across and see her watching me, I smile suspiciously, “What’s up?”
“Oh nothing, I was just wondering what you were thinking then?” I smile out of the corner of my mouth “I was thinking, that was incredible!”
Out of the corner of my eye, I watch her colour rise and she blushes, and there we go… “Hey, don’t go shy on me, it’s good. I wanted you to tell me for a reason, I wanted you to trust me, trust that I can give you what you need,” she angles her head on one side and listens to me intently.
She’s frowning again.
“Honestly Lex, I didn’t expect you too, you took me completely by surprise. I’ve been too worried about your state of mind to be any rougher, after what you’ve been through.” I put my full attention back on the road and let her think about what I said.
“Blake,”
“Yeah, sweetheart,” she scrapes her teeth across her bottom, this is her nervous tell. “I know what I went through still haunts me, but there’s a difference; I trust you. I know you won’t hurt me and I love you, with all of my heart. I never thought I’d ever love anyone else, but in just a few weeks you’ve managed to break me down. I don’t know whether it’s too soon or not and I know I’m a pain in the arse with my issues and I’m sorry, but I promise you, I’ll work on them. Paul ultimately dragged me down, I just wish I could have been stronger,” she says the little bit quieter, and I can see the glaze of tears in her eyes.
“You know Blake,” Lex looks across at me with her gorgeous big brown eyes, so I give her my full attention. “Bruises fade eventually, but it’s the words that that leave the biggest scars: they stay with you forever. As bad as the physical abuse was, the mental abuse was so much worse.”
I pull up outside of her building, I turn in my seat so I can see her properly, I cup her cheek with one hand and take her other with mine, “sweetheart, don’t cry. Listen to me, you are strong, that bastard will pay one day for what he did to you, and as for your issues, well, they’re also my issues now too, because you won’t fight them alone anymore – we will fight them…together and yes you’re a pain in the arse,” she giggles at that little joke. I needed a little joke to pull her from her thoughts. The mood turns sombre again,
“But you’re my pain in the arse and also the sweetest and sexiest pain I’ll ever want or need.” She smiles through the tears which slip down her cheeks, I wipe the tears from her cheek I’m holding, and she swipes the ones away from the other side.
“What have you done to me – I hardly ever cried before, now I’m one big ball of emotion.”
I kiss the tears from her face, “that’s because you have the biggest heart and I want it all, well other than the little man in there, but I love him too, and I want you to know that I’m here for you both, okay.” She nods at me and smiles a little, “come on, my little minx, Liv will think we’ve got lost, and I need to go and make sure I still have nuts because I think I’ve turned into a woman and I need a beer! There’s always an excuse for a beer.”
We get out of the car, Lex is laughing again, so I’m happy, I pull her towards me, wrap my arm around her shoulders, give her a loud kiss on the cheek and head into her flat.
We hear Grady chuckling when we walk in, I glance across at, Lex, she looks happy, and I love knowing I can put that look on her face, I’d give up everything to see that look all the time. Liv is on the floor with Grady tickling him and playing with him, I stand over them smiling at them both.
Grady looks up and sees me, he struggles to get up. Once he’s sitting up his arms go up to be picked up, “Hey little buddy,” I lift him in the air above my head, he loves when I do that to him, “let’s go see mummy yeah?” I put my hand on his tummy and the other on his back and fly him around through the room to the kitchen like he’s Superman.
“Mummy, Super Grady is coming,” he’s giggling and shouting for his mum as I drop him in her arms, I kiss her sloppily, and Grady gets one too, and I go into the lounge and sit in front of the telly.
After mindlessly flicking through the telly for 10 minutes I call my dad to let him know how we got on and I send a text to Jack to let him know too.
I sit back and observe my life now, in just a few short weeks, I’ve gone from being single and just existing to actually living again – all because of Lex. I can hear Lex and Liv talking in the kitchen, Grady comes in and crawls on my lap and sits with his beaker of juice, I put some classic cartoons on for him so we sit and watch them together.
My mum would love this, and she’d definitely adore Lex and Grady, I wish she were here to see it, she’d be so proud. “Hey you okay,” I hear the Lex’ sweet voice, I look down and see her crouching in front of me.
I nod “I was just thinking about my mum, she would have loved you and Grady,”
“Really?” I nod again at her, “yeah I know it.”
“Dinners done, I’ve only done pasta Bolognese for quickness,” she gets up and goes back to the kitchen. “Come on little buddy, Tom and Jerry will have to wait,” I pick his beaker up and join my family at the table. My family, God that sounds good!
CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT
ALEXIA
A couple of weeks have pave passed since we went to the solicitors to start divorce proceedings, I’ve had a letter from my Solicitor to confirm he sent a letter to Paul but he’s had no confirmation back yet, I feel physically sick, all the waiting is killing me. I just want to know whether he’s going to contest it or not, knowing Paul he won’t divorce me just to spite me.
It’s strange because when I was going to work the other day I could have sworn, I saw him standing on the corner of the road down from the restaurant, but I think it was my mind playing tricks on me. I try to drink my cup of tea, but it makes me heave. I get up and tip it down the sink, I pour some orange juice instead and eat the rest of my toast, I sit back at the table, I’m in a world of my own when I feel lips kiss the top of my head.
“Morning Princess,” I shake from my stupor, “Morning Honey.” I smile at him a little.
I see him put Grady to the floor, he props his head on one side and studies me, “Are you okay babe?” he puts his hand on my forehead, “You don’t look too good,” he worriedly tells me.
“You should have woken me!” Grady hugs my legs grabs his juice from the table and scurries off into the lounge.
“Nah it’s fine, I’d been lying in bed in bed awake for ages and Grady was still asleep so I got up, I didn’t want to disturb you tossing and turning.”
Blake gets a mischievous look on his face, “I don’t mind you tossing – you know that” he runs his palm up my bare thigh, “Stop it,” I laugh.
“That’s better, I can see that stunning smile of yours now.”
“I feel a little sick that’s all, I think it’s all this business with the divorce and not hearing off Paul, that’s what worries me most. I have to go to work too tonight, but I’ll be okay later.” He kisses me on the
forehead and gets up to make some toast and for them both and himself some coffee.
“Why don’t you just jack it in, you’re knackered, you hate the late nights…”
“How am I supposed to pay my bills then, clever dick?”
“Well for a starter you could give up this place and live with me, I only spend so much time here because Liv’s at mine, it’s time she sorted herself out now! She either needs to find herself a place or go back to dad’s, she’s got a job with Jack and me so she’s got money.”
“I heard her on the phone the other day, while she was here, telling whoever it was on the other end, not to come here but she sounded so sad babe,” the grumbling is back in my tummy, it feels like a washing machine at the moment.
“It’s definitely a man, she seemed sad and angry at the same time. I felt sorry for her, I told her if she wanted to talk I’d be here for her, but I can’t make her. I want her to talk so she isn’t like me.” He kisses me hard on the lips.
“Thank you,” he gets up and takes the plates and cups to the sink, He runs the tap to fill up the sink to wash them.
I have got a dishwasher, but I don’t use it very often. Suddenly the telly which was on a low volume gets turned up, some 70’s classic is on, ‘You to Me Are Everything’ by The Real Thing.
Blake spins around and starts singing – loudly, his arms are stretched open, and he’s kneeling down on one knee singing it to me.
I laugh loudly at him while I swoon at this man that I love wholeheartedly, at the same time, no one has ever sung to me before. Blake Davids, one hundred percent, owns my heart.
My hands are covering my face, while I’m in hysterics. I hear the buzzer sound, and I go to get up, but he holds my legs in place and crawls so he’s wedged in between my legs. Blake pulls my hands from my face and kisses them, “I love you, baby, have a think about what I said,” I nod my head, sincerely,
“I will - I promise. Are you done embarrassing me now?”
Blake kisses me tenderly on the forehead as he’s getting up off of the floor, “I think so – for now anyway,” he says as he’s walking away to see who’s at the door. I shake my head in disbelief at his show in the kitchen when I hear,
“what up dude?” Blake walks in with Becka trailing behind him,
“I’ll leave you girls in peace, I’m going to work.” He pulls me up out of the chair, places his hands on my bum to pull me closer and kisses me, he takes total possession of my mouth, I feel his hands go to my face so he can kiss me deeper until I’m putty in his hands.
“please get a room, it’s way too early for that!” Becka says as Blake pulls away from me with sweet little kisses to my face.
“We’ve got one thanks; in fact, we have two. Ring me later. Love you Princess.” Blake then kisses Becka on the cheek and winks at her cheekily, “I don’t want you feeling left out, look after my girl she’s not well,” he smacks me on the backside on the way out of the kitchen.
“Love you too,” I shout back at him. Making a stop in the lounge to give Grady a kiss and he’s gone out of the door.
“What’s does he mean, you’re not well?” I look at her with a disapproving look,
“I’m fine,” she raises her eyebrows at me, “I just feel a bit sick that’s but I think it’s all this business with the divorce.” She was so happy when I told her I had applied for a divorce, she actually screamed down the phone, and I could just imagine her fist bumping the air as I was telling her.
“I just think if he’s going to contest it then he should just say, don’t you?” Becka agrees nodding her head,
“Yeah well, he’s always been a bastard anyway, he makes me sick Lex, and now you’re getting yourself in a state and making yourself sick. If I ever see that piece of shit I’m gonna give him such a hard kick in the bollocks, he’s gonna feel them in the back of his throat like they’re tonsils!” I snort at her.
I love her rants.
We change the subject and spend a couple of hours talking, laughing and playing with Grady in between until she goes to get some chores done. I’m still feeling sick; I don’t know what’s wrong with me today. I take it easy for the rest of the day until it’s time for work.
By the time nine o’clock rolled around, I was ready to collapse, my head was banging, I still felt sick, and I kept going dizzy. One of the girls I work with sat me on a stool and got me a glass of water, once I felt a little better I went to stand until the room spun and my colleague managed to stop me falling, she lay me on the floor. I can hear voices everywhere, but nothing making any sense.
“Lex, can you hear me?” I nodded slightly to Louise to let her know I heard her, “Can you ring someone to fetch you, hun,” I nodded again and tried to get up.
“I need my phone from my bag,” I took off the cold compress they put on my forehead while I waited for Louise to come back and sat up. She handed me my phone, and I pull Blake’s number up, I put it to my ear and wait for him to answer.
“Hey baby, everything okay?”
“Yeah, can you come and fetch me please babe,”
“Yeah, of course, I’m on my way now.”
“Thanks, babe.” I put the phone down, Louise and Stuart help me up off the floor and get me some fresh water.
Ten minutes later Blake arrives and heads straight for me.
“Hey princess, what happened,” he soothes my hair down, he’s holding my head to his stomach, “come on, let’s get you home.”
We leave the restaurant and go back home, once in the flat, Lisa is a little surprised to see me.
“Oh, you’re back early,” She says as we walk through the door, Blake sits me on the sofa.
“Lisa take this, you can go home now sweetheart,” I see him pass her twenty pounds and he then takes me to bed, he undresses me takes my bra off and puts a vest top over my head and pulls it down.
“Can I just say for the record, this is the first time I’ll put clothes on you instead of taking them off,” I snort at him, “did you just snort?” Blake laughs with me, but when I hold my head he stops. “What happened?”
“You knew I felt sick this morning, well, it didn’t really get any better. By nine I felt sick and dizzy, so I sat down, when I got up my legs went from under me, and I fell, luckily Louise caught me.”
“Why didn’t you call in sick Lex, you weren’t well enough,” he says soothingly, while stroking my hair.
He kisses me on the brow and stands up straight, “Give me five minutes I’ll get you some paracetamol, a drink, and I’ll lock up and join ya.” I can hear Blake pottering about in the kitchen, I can feel myself drifting off to sleep, and within merely seconds I’m asleep.
BLAKE
I walk into the bedroom and see she’s fast asleep, I put her water and tablets on the bedside table next to her, then strip out of my clothes. I gently get into bed, so I don’t disturb her and spoon behind her so at least when she wakes she knows I’m here. I kiss her hair and settle down to sleep.
After I had left Lex this morning, I went home showered, changed and picked up Liv for work, she really needs a car, I haven’t got the time to run her about everywhere. We had quite a productive day today, I went to see a new client and got a new contract to build some office buildings in the nicer part of town. Jack has been showing Liv how to do the books in case one of us aren’t here.
I’m apprehensive about Lex, though, this divorce business is really grating on her nerves, she’s walking on eggshells at the moment waiting for news, whether that dick is going to contest it or not, fuck this. I dial the solicitor's number.
“Hi, can I speak to Mr Roberts please?”
“I’m afraid he’s on a call at the moment, can I take a message for him?”
“Yeah, you can tell him this is Blake Davids and ask him to ring me as soon as possible please. He’s got my number. Thanks.”
I don’t bother to say goodbye, yeah I’m a prick – who cares! This is my girl, and I will sort it out.
“You’re
polite today?” Liv says sarcastically. “Two weeks it’s been Liv, Lex don’t know whether she’s coming or going, she’s not sleeping, and this morning she’s starting feeling sick, oh and she’s not eating, so forgive me for being a bastard on the phone because I want some answers. Now let’s go over some accounts, and you can get familiar with them.”
We spend another hour going over some accounts, and I realise we haven’t eaten anything, it’s almost three in the afternoon so I send Liv down to the deli down the road for a sandwich.
Jack walks into the office and sits in front of me.
“What’s up buddy?” Jack asks as he puts his feet on the corner on my desk.
“Get your feet off my desk,”
“Liv’s right, you are moody today,”
“I’m not moody, I’m angry! That bastards she’s married to, put her through enough. Now he won’t even contact the solicitors and on top of all that, Lex isn’t feeling well. I think this divorce business is taking out of her, she’s not sleeping, not eating and now she’s feeling sick from it.” Jack looks on guiltily,
“She’s not pregnant is she?” he says frowning.
“Nah she’s on that contraceptive pill injection, she said she had the last one just before we met.”
“Now that, is a picture, your face then,” he laughs, the dickhead. I throw a pen at him so he can see I’m not in the mood for his jokes
“Ow,” he says, rubbing his head
“Lex has enough to worry about at the moment. How’s Amelia doing?”
“She’s good, almost seven months and well, you’ve seen how big she is, she wants to go out and buy the cot and stuff at the weekend, and I’ve got to decorate the nursery.”
“Yeah, good luck with that!”
“You know you could come and help, bring Lex and Grady, Amelia would love it!”
“Let me talk me to Lex, now get out of my office I got work to do!” With a huff, he gets up and turns to walk from the office but not before he collides with Liv, “Jack, you, big buffoon, move.”
