Keeping You

by Jessie Evans

  “You’re right. I think that fantasy guy thing is going to work just fine.”

  —and Nash felt like a fool, but only for a moment.

  It was better if the attraction were one sided. The last thing he needed was to end up sleeping with Aria March. No matter how beautiful she was, no matter how much he wanted her, starting an affair would only lead to misery and heartache for them both. They were from two different worlds and about as compatible as French Fries and Champagne. It was better if this remained a business arrangement, a contract between two civil adults. That way, when it was over, it would be over, with no emotions or attachment to complicate their separation.

  “Well, good,” he said with a smile as he held out his hand. “You feeling ready to pretend to be in love?”

  “As ready as I’ll ever be.” Aria slipped her slender palm into his and let him lead her toward the licensing department, while Nash did his best to ignore how right it felt to have his former enemy by his side.

  Chapter Five

  Aria refused to think about her and Nash’s first kiss of the day, or the wedding ceremony, or the kiss that came after, or the way Nash picked her up and spun her around until she giggled, right in front of the Justice of the Peace and the other three couples waiting to get married.

  She wasn’t going to think about how he made her feel like she was waking up from a long, numb sleep, coming alive with wants and needs and hungers she had forgotten for too long. She wasn’t going to think about how much she wanted to kiss him again, to taste his Nash taste and smell his clean, woodsy Nash smell and relish the warm, electric, delicious way he made her feel.

  And she certainly wasn’t going to think about how much she wanted to drag him into a room with a bed, slam the door, and ravish him until both of them were bruised with pleasure, aching with gratification, and too exhausted to do so much as blink.

  Lucky for her, they were almost to her parents’ house. Aria was certain Mom and Dad’s reactions to her sudden marriage would banish even the hint of lust from her bloodstream.

  She tapped her fingers on the armrest in Nash’s truck, her rhythm getting faster and more urgent as they pulled onto her parents’ street.

  “Nervous again?” Nash asked.

  “Terrified might be a better word,” Aria said. “I’m pretty sure my mama is going to kill me.”

  “Why’s that?”

  “Sue loves weddings. Like really loves them,” Aria said, knee jogging up and down as the house came into sight. “She nearly had a heart attack when I told her I had eloped the first time. Now that I’ve done it again…” Aria’s heart jumped into her throat and lodged there, making it hard to breathe.

  “I’m not sure I can do this,” she squeaked as Nash parked the truck. “What if she never speaks to me again?”

  “Come on, now. It won’t be that bad.” Nash’s hand settled on her knee, sending a shock of awareness flowing through her body.

  She could tell he meant to be comforting, but his touch was so far from comforting, it wasn’t even funny. His warm hand on her bare skin only made her anxiety spike higher. How was she going to do this? How was she going to pretend to be in love with Nash in public without letting the way he made her feel bleed over into their relationship in private?

  She wasn’t going to last a day at this rate. She would be begging him to touch her by bedtime, and well on her way to making a fool out of herself by tomorrow morning. And in the meantime, her mother would be disappointed, her Daddy would think she was insane, and when it was over, the entire family would feel sorry for her. It would be the “Poor Aria” show all over again, and the shame of being pitied by everyone she loved would make something inside of her curl up and die like a slug covered in salt.

  She couldn’t do this. This was a mistake, a terrible, terrible mistake!

  “Breathe,” Nash said, his low, honeyed voice penetrating the haze of panic fogging her thoughts. “You made a decision that is in the best interest of your daughter. That’s what this is all about.”

  Aria took a deeper breath and nodded. He was right. This was about Felicity. If she kept her focus on her daughter, everything would be all right.

  “Now let’s go in there and convince your family we’re a happy, healthy couple who are going to give your daughter a wonderful home,” Nash said, pressing on before she could start to stress all over again. “I know it won’t be easy, but think about it this way: after today, the rest of the town will be gravy.”

  Aria looked over at him, at his earnest expression and kind eyes, and something fluttered behind her ribs. If she didn’t know better, she would think she was sitting next to a man who really cared about her. But she’d seen Nash go from sweet to nasty before. She knew better than to let his comforting drawl and encouraging words make her drop her guard again.

  She knew better, but that wasn’t always enough to keep her stupid heart in line.

  Your heart has nothing to do with it. It’s Felicity that matters. Keep your heart closed up tight and your legs closed tighter, and do what you need to do to keep your child from being forced to grow up with a full-time parent like Liam.

  Woman up, Aria. Your daughter needs you.

  Aria sat up straighter, resolve renewed after her mental pep talk. “I’m ready,” she said, gripping the door handle. “Let’s go in there and be so damned sweet we give my entire family a toothache before the afternoon is over.”

  “That’s my girl,” Nash said, laughing as he slammed out of the driver’s side and jogged around to help her out of the truck.

  His words made that fluttery feeling whisper in her chest again, but Aria ignored it.

  She wasn’t his girl, she was her own woman, and Felicity’s mama, and she was prepared to do whatever it took to defend her little family, even if it meant lying like a dog to the rest of the people she loved.

  ***

  After an initial moment of stunned shock in the wake their announcement—followed by tentative congratulations from Lark and Mason, giddy squeals of excitement from Melody, tears from her mother, and a tight-lipped nod and too-tight handshake for Nash from her father—the afternoon grew progressively more pleasant.

  Either she and Nash were excellent actors, or her family was simply so eager for their black sheep to find her hometown happily ever after that they were willing to swallow a ludicrous story about Nash and Aria realizing they’d never fallen out of love and deciding to make up for lost time by eloping.

  Whichever deserved the credit—good acting or her family’s eagerness to be deceived—the acceptance of Aria’s new husband went far more smoothly than she’d anticipated.

  By the time they’d finished grilling chicken for a late lunch, Mom was letting Nash help her set the table and complimenting him on making Captain so early in his career, Lark was giving Aria the thumbs-up sign behind Nash’s back, and Mason was clapping Nash on the shoulder so often you’d think the two of them had been carrying on a bro-mance for years. Mason was that excited to have Nash as a future brother-in-law.

  And Felicity…

  Well, Felicity made it clear how she felt about Nash, taking to him with the same warmth and immediacy as she had the first time, giggling when he called her “Skeeter,” following him around the yard showing him all her toys, and insisting on sitting on his lap during the meal instead of eating in her high chair.

  The only person who continued to look less-than-thrilled about Aria’s sudden marriage was her father.

  Aria wasn’t the least bit surprised when Dad appeared in her bedroom doorway as she was packing a few last-minute items to take with her to Nash’s house

  “Hi, Daddy,” Aria said with what she hoped was a blissed-out-bride sort of smile. “Did you come up to say goodbye?”

  “No, I came up to tell you that you don’t have to do this,” he said, cutting right to the chase, the way Bob March always did. “You don’t have to marry that boy to keep Felicity with you.”

  “He’s not a boy, Dadd
y. He’s a man and he’s my husband,” she said, turning her attention back to the baby bag, shoving the last of the diapers in the top, not enjoying lying to her father. “I know you don’t like Nash, but I’ve made the decision I think is best for me and Felicity.”

  “I don’t like or dislike him. I don’t even know the man, and neither do you,” he said, coming to sit on the edge of the bed a few feet away. “You wouldn’t have rushed into this if you didn’t need to move out of this house, and you know it. And I know it. And I know it’s…my fault.”

  Aria turned to face him, pained by the defeated slump of his shoulders. “Daddy, that’s not true. It’s not your fault.”

  “It is my fault. If I hadn’t pulled that stupid stunt, you and Felicity would still be safe here.” He studied the hands fisted in his lap for a long moment before looking up. “But I’m trying to mitigate the damage. I hired a private investigator to follow Liam around Nashville, see what kind of dirt he can dig up.”

  “Oh, Dad, no.” Aria winced. She’d already caused enough trouble snooping around in Mason’s past a few months ago.

  At least now she knew where she got her suspicious streak.

  “He’s a rat, honey, and rats leave trails,” her dad said. “We just need to find them. Once we get enough evidence to prove he’s bad for Felicity, everything will be fine. You can stay here, and we’ll get this marriage annulled and—”

  “No, Dad,” Aria said, surprised to find the possibility of staying with her parents not even a little tempting. “That isn’t going to happen.”

  No matter how generous and helpful her mom and dad had been, she was past ready to move out. Grown children weren’t meant to live with their parents. It was unnatural and stirred up every adolescent hang-up Aria had ever had. Even living with Nash and dealing with all the insanity that was bound to cause was more appealing. And by the time she and Nash went their separate ways, she would be getting a pay raise from Lark and hopefully be able to afford a small apartment of her own.

  Besides, even if she wanted to stay, she had made a promise to Nash and she didn’t take promises lightly.

  “I’m moving in with Nash, and Felicity is coming with me, and Nash and I are going to do our best to make our marriage work,” she said. “That’s the end of it.”

  “But you don’t love him,” her dad said, standing up to pace the carpet in front of the bed. “I can tell, even if the rest of those dummies down there can’t.”

  Aria smiled. “You just called your wife, children, and future son-in-law dummies, Dad. That’s real mature.”

  Her dad scowled. “I’m not trying to be mature, I’m trying to keep my daughter from making another mistake.”

  Another mistake.

  The way he said it made it seem like all Aria had done was flit from one bad choice to another, from the day she first left home to the day she drug herself back in disgrace years later. She had made her share of mistakes—Aria could admit that—but she had also had wonderful adventures.

  She’d studied to be a pastry chef in France, backpacked through Germany, lived on a commune on a vineyard in the Italian countryside, and gone to more rock concerts than a Rolling Stones groupie. She had more interesting stories to tell after twenty-eight years than most people had after a lifetime.

  She also had a daughter. A beautiful, magical little girl who, despite the fact that her father wasn’t the man Aria thought he was, was not a mistake. Felicity was a treasure, and Aria could do worse for her child than moving in with a man who obviously adored babies in general, and Felicity, in particular.

  She could do much worse for Felicity…like staying here with a grandpa who made her mama feel like a sad, pathetic failure.

  “I love you, Daddy,” Aria said, swinging the baby bag over one shoulder and grabbing the small suitcase from the floor. “But this is my life and I have to make my own decisions, and this one is already made.”

  Her dad frowned. “Well, don’t come crying to me when it falls apart, because it will. That boy has never had your best interests at heart, not when you were a little girl he was attacking in the woods, and not now.”

  “I wasn’t a little girl, Daddy, and he wasn’t…” Aria stopped herself.

  Once her dad had something stuck in his head, it was pointless to argue. She was wasting breath and time she and Nash would need to get the crib he had borrowed set up in Felicity’s room before bedtime.

  “You know what?” she said. “I’m not going to argue about this. I’m going to tell you goodnight and thank you for trying to help, and I’m going to go. I hope next time we get together we can enjoy each other’s company without all the unsolicited advice.”

  “Maybe we can,” Daddy said, scowling. “As long as you leave that idiot you married at home.”

  Aria shook her head and sighed, a part of her wanting to defend Nash—he had many annoying qualities, but he was far from an idiot—but she knew when to cut her losses.

  She turned and walked out the bedroom door and down the stairs without a backward glance, kissing her mom and sisters goodbye before heading out to Nash’s truck, trying her best not to think too much about the night to come.

  Chapter Six

  Don’t panic, don’t panic, Aria chanted silently to herself.

  “That went well.” Nash grinned at Aria across the back seat of the truck. He strapped Felicity into her seat as Aria stuffed the bag and small suitcase onto the floor beneath the baby’s feet.

  The truck bed was already full of Aria’s two suitcases, Felicity’s giant duffel bag of clothes, two toy chests, a few tote bags stuffed with sheets for the crib, baby towels, soap, and other toiletries, and the crib Nash had picked up earlier in the day.

  The “moving in together” situation was becoming more real with every passing moment, but so far Nash didn’t seem to be freaking out.

  Aria wished she could say the same.

  “You okay?” he asked, wincing as Felicity grabbed a handful of his hair and squealed, but not pulling the baby’s hand away. He was like a giant Labrador retriever, patiently enduring Felicity’s rough handling.

  Aria considered a comforting lie, but decided she might as well tell the truth.

  “My dad came up to talk while I was packing,” Aria said.

  Nash gently dislodged Felicity’s hand, exchanging his hair for the baby’s favorite toy hammer. “I can imagine how that went.”

  Aria sighed. “He’s going to have a lot of fun saying ‘I told you so’ when we break up in a few months.”

  Nash paused, staring at her with an expression Aria couldn’t quite decipher.

  “What?” she finally asked, barely resisting the urge to start nibbling on her nails.

  “I know your dad isn’t a fan, but I had a good time with your family and Skeeter today,” he said then added in a softer voice. “I had a good time with you today.”

  “I…I had a good time with you, too,” Aria said, so flustered she couldn’t work up the gumption to tell him to stop calling Felicity by that ridiculous nickname.

  Nash smiled again, the smile that made his eyes crinkle and Aria’s insides feel infested with butterflies. “So, I say, why not enjoy it? Nobody said we couldn’t have fun pretending to be married.”

  “I…I guess not,” Aria said.

  “So let’s just be friends, have a good time, and not think too far into the future.”

  Aria cocked her head, studying him for a long moment as she worked up the courage to ask, “So you don’t hate me anymore?”

  Nash’s smile faded, but the intensity in his eyes remained. “The truth is I never hated you, Aria. Not even when I really wanted to.”

  Her eyes felt unexpectedly prickly as she said, “I never hated you, either.”

  “Then it sounds like we’re on the same page,” he said.

  Aria nodded, but as she and Nash got into the truck and he aimed them back across town, she couldn’t help but wonder what page that was.

  Were they friends now?
Friends who were pretending to be married to help each other out?

  That sounded like what Nash had been saying, but the tension simmering in the air between them didn’t feel friendly. It felt alive with awareness and longing and dangerous possibilities.

  Aria’s skin hummed the entire hour and a half it took to get Felicity settled in her new room—putting up the crib, filling the bureau with her clothes, and setting up her toy boxes so the baby could make sure all her toys had survived the move. Aria was keenly aware of every glance Nash sent her way, and every time their hands accidentally brushed. By the time she escaped to the bathroom to give Felicity a quick bath and get her daughter changed into her sleeper, Aria was a nervous wreck all over again.

  Once Felicity was safely in bed, it wouldn’t be long until it was time for her and Nash to go to sleep, and so far Aria had only seen one other bedroom, with one king-sized bed in it.

  It was an inviting bedroom, warm and cozy looking, with coffee-colored walls and a burgundy bedspread with gold fleur di les on it that was masculine, but still looked like something a woman had picked out. The rest of the house bore feminine touches as well—curtains, decorative pillows on the big green couch, and a giant potted plant in one corner by the window. Nash’s place was cute in a country sort of way, but it was the kitchen that had grabbed Aria’s attention when they walked in, and the kitchen she returned to when Felicity was tucked in and chewing on her bunny’s ear in her nightly pre-sleep, self-soothing ritual.

  Aria wandered through the living room into the large, combined, kitchen-and-dining-room space, getting a closer look at the artwork crowding the walls. The wood the pieces were painted on was different colors, but all faded, as if it had been sourced from various crumbling buildings. The choice of canvas was interesting, but it was the paintings on the wood that demanded a second look.

  Each portrait was of a different local animal—owl, deer, rabbit, hawk—but with the animals’ body parts made up of pieces of old machinery, cogs, wheels, engine parts, and other things you might find in a junkyard. The artist had used muted reds, blues, and a wide variety of rust colors in his or her choice of paint. The effect was stunning on the old wood. The portraits looked modern, but old-fashioned; sad and worn, but somehow playful at the same time.