- You must give this drawing to her," I finally said. And I was surprised to discover that there were tears in my eyes.
There was a light smile on a vampire's lips.
- I won't ask you if you liked it.
- It's beautiful," I said sincerely.
- Will you look at it next? - He shone like a kid who was given the keys to a real Mercedes on New Year's. And I barely put Nadine's portrait aside.
The second portrait was mine. It depicted me, but it wasn't the same as in life. It's the same mirror. And it's kind of the same me. It's also worth half a turn to the viewer. But - again, strange. For some reason, I was wearing a cardinal's guard costume. A scarlet cloak with a golden cross waved in the wind. Next to me, on a light blue background, there was a hat with a feather. In my left hand I was clutching the dagger, lifting it like a cross. In my right hand I held a long sword with the book down. The outward resemblance was undeniable. But not internal! I was in complete agreement with Nadine's portrait because it reflected Nadine's soul. But my portrait was different. I wasn't like that. I only dreamed of it. But I could never do it. In Nadine's eyes, the doppelganger reads meekness and love. There was love in my eyes too, but completely different. Nadia could admire anyone from afar or near her. My painted doppelganger roared his teeth in a bold smile. The woman in the portrait offered - everything. Friendship, love, partnership, sex, epee duels, moonlight walks on rooftops, dinner at a Chinese restaurant and a bottle of vodka sipped from under the floor in the men's room - everything a woman could offer. And at the same time she looked at it with a challenge: "I'm offering! But will you be able to take what I offer, and how will I offer it to you? If you can, we will be together. If you can't, get out of here! We don't hold or hold weaklings! "Something gave the portrait that look. And something in it was wrong, but one that wanted to look and see. And trying to figure out what was wrong. The woman held her gaze - and you did not immediately look in the mirror on the portrait.
There was a monster reflected. Scary and somehow disgusting. A lion mane, horns, mouth full of sharp teeth in three rows, a predatory and impetuous body - a mixture of a lion with a dragon's tail and eagle's wings, partly covered with wool and partly with scales. If I had seen such a terrible thing in my childhood, I would have had nightmares for a week at night. And now...
The monster had my eyes. It stood on its feet in a fit of rage, roaring and pounding its front paws in the mirror, as if trying to reach a woman in a portrait, and she smiled. It was only now that I knew what was wrong. The woman had monster eyes - too big and with vertical pupils. Predictive yellow.
- Beauty and the beast?
I'm not upset. On the contrary. The vampire really didn't mean to hurt me. And the beast in the mirror? Who doesn't have it in their shower? Every human has... monstrous situations, otherwise you can't tell. When you have to choose, you'll stay human or you'll become a beast. And not everyone makes that choice towards humanity.
I killed myself last night... I did, didn't I? Did I become a monster? I don't know yet. But if someone enjoys the pain and suffering of other people like maniacs, terrorists and other bastards... Tearing them up is a matter of honor for every decent person. A princess can't handle it, but a monster is for a sweet soul. So enjoy his appetite!
- The two sides of your soul. The way I see it.
- It wasn't me at all - there was sadness and envy in my voice. Yes, it wasn't me. But how I wish I could have been like that! And I don't mean the monster! But to be like a woman with his eyes would be an honor. And Grandpa and Mom would be proud of me if I were even a tenth like her.
- That's you too, Danielle was very serious. - That's what I see in you. Your fire, your challenge, your passion! Sooner or later, now sooner or later, you'll be just like this!
- And why a guard cape?
My voice is suddenly high and thin. Electric waves were floating around the room. I didn't know what to call it yet, but I could feel it with all my skin. Or did you already know? Isn't that the kind of tension that hangs between two people who are desperate to touch each other but don't dare? I had a hard time answering that question. And to Daniel? I slowly ran my fingers down the sleeve of his sweater, and the vampire flinched.
- You have such hot hands...
- You, on the other hand, are cool and calm. I like your hands, Danielle.
I wouldn't do anything else. But it didn't take any more. Danielle put the tray aside and intercepted my hand, pressing it against his skin. Somewhere at the bottom of my stomach, I started to get strange tension.
- I like your hands too, Jane. And I like you a lot.
I raised my head and looked at him. There was a strange dark fire burning in my grey eyes. Desire? It's possible. I had never had anyone before - and I couldn't tell. And I said what I had to say. It's better to find out all at once than to suffer later.
- Danielle, are you sure this isn't out of gratitude or a desire to secure allies? If it is, it's not worth working for. We're still in the same boat. And I will help you in any way I can. Don't waste your charm on me... and other fluids. By the way, can I get you a portrait?
His face remained completely nonchalant, but something else shone in his eyes. It's not passion anymore. Respect? The warmth of friendship?
- I'll give it to you. He is yours. By the way, I was sure you wouldn't say that. Thought it was too soon. But you've already started to change. Whether you like it or not, you're becoming like my drawing. The best part of the drawing. Doesn't mean you won't have a monster inside you, though. And - you're right. Now, if we were in the same bed again, it would just be like that. To tie you tighter to yourself. But... promise me that then we'll resume our... conversation?
- I promise, I shrugged my shoulders. Why wouldn't you? A promise won't kill me. Especially since we have not set any deadlines. And I reached for the tray. - And until you finally tell me how you came to visit Duke? Well, you and I got away somehow. You made me so saddened by your paintings, everything else slipped my mind!
The vampire was very pleased with the compliment. He didn't say or do anything, but I felt his pleasure like a wave of warmth passing through my skin. Some kind of vampire ability? Or not vampire skills? What happened between us last night? What nearly killed me and turned the blood in my veins into liquid fire? Is it in him - or me?
- It's very simple. My Princess lent me to him. Princess Elizabeth, that is her name. She's Russian, by the way, and she's about nine hundred years old. She's pretty good at art, too. She's the one who initiated me. She's owned me ever since. Like a thing. It's a toy. It would be, but in one thing I was beyond her control. In my paintings. She ordered me to draw it, and I did. But I can't paint at dictation. You saw yourself and your friend. You really are. And I can't paint you any differently. I can lie with words, but not with paintings. I painted her portraits in the most incredible costumes or no clothes at all, I tried sincerely, but I never managed to paint her differently. Look at this. It's from memory.
I took another sheet, and my skin was shaking. It had careless touches of a naked woman. This time it was the only one. Without a mirror. And no clothes. Naked nature is full height, one hand is sloppyly lowered to the thigh, the other is stretched out in a gesture of dominance. She was beautiful. Very beautiful. A wave of hair flowing down to the knees, a perfect face, a beautiful figure. But there was something else... At first sight she seemed beautiful. At the second look, it was disgusting. Like a banana with worms. Beautiful strong yellow skin, looks even tasty. And when you start cleaning it, you know you can't touch or bite it. I'm gonna throw up. And even her portrait was cold and cruel. I physically felt her cold, irreconcilable aversion to everything living. And I also felt that this woman is able to find pleasure in someone else's pain. If she is the same in a portrait as in life, it is disgusting! I wouldn't want to get into her hands. But I wanted her to be in my hands. Then I would take a stake of aspen and drive it right into her heart. To Daniel.
- You know, t
he vampire was looking at me carefully. - You're not painting yourself?
- No. And I'm completely ignorant about art. I can't tell Picasso from Van Gogh and Dali from Levitan.
- It's just little things. You may not know the difference, but you can feel what the artist wanted to convey. Now you had disgust and rage on your face. What did you think of her?
- That she likes to torture people.
- That's right. But not just people. Vampires, werewolves, elves, trolls, anyone she gets her hands on. She enjoys the pain and terror of others, she likes to humiliate those who depend on her... It was disgusting to me.
- Did you say that to her face?
I didn't know Daniel too well, but suddenly I thought he was capable of it. And even more. The vampire shook his head. Chestnut hair shattered over a gray sweater. I thought Nadia had great taste. It was this smoky shade that best suited the vampire's eyes and shaded the shine of his hair.
- Well, I'm not suicidal. I just wanted her to understand. I painted her, but not the way she wanted to see herself. And she's smart, very smart. You can't take that away from her. And she knew that all the other vampires were looking at her with my eyes. And not just vampires. It's unpleasant, Jane, when someone knows the whole truth about you. She ordered me to go to Andre's. He needed an artist, so I worked on the club. I worked like an obsessed man! I loved that job! And besides, I wanted to stay with Andre. Under his protection. Andre wasn't the best gentleman either, but he wouldn't have required me to worship, adoration and hourly praise.
I doubted it, but I didn't say anything. And I asked another question.
- Danielle, what if she didn't want to let you go?
- Andre could go to the Council. If he offered me his protection, I would accept it. And the Elders would have confirmed our decision. And there was nothing Elizabeth could have done. But she was smarter than that. And you found me like this. It's been eight days now.
I suddenly got cold, and I wrapped my arms around me. Eight days?! Higher Powers! How could he have endured all this and not gone mad?!
- I've been tortured for pain, and crazy people don't care about pain. So they tried to keep me sane. And pain can be inflicted without being too ugly. Especially since vampires regenerate quickly.
- Danielle...
There was a sincere sympathy in my voice. I had no words, but who needs words?! Danielle knew very well that I was here, I was there for him, that any minute I was ready to help and support him. And that in this battle we would fight hand in hand. And I'm not going to hit him in the back. There are enough exalted ladies and lovers at all times. But real girlfriends with whom you can stop a horse on a racetrack, and in a burning hut together, meet much less often.
There was silence in the room for a few seconds. Then I took the risk of voicing the question.
- Did she order you to do this?
Danielle put his head down. Long hair concealed his face. But if he wanted to hide from the question like that, it was a miscalculation. I gently pulled the curtains aside, like a curtain, and the light of his grey eyes spurted out at me. There was sadness and memory of the pain he had experienced.
- Yes or no, Danielle? And if she is, why would she be so difficult? Why wouldn't she torture you among her own? She doesn't owe anyone a report in her house, does she? Why send you to another prince? Doesn't she have enough executioners?
- Elizabeth is a very old vampire. Approximately nine hundred years old. That's a lot, Jane. It's a lot. And she's very strong. She created me, and I belong to her. But I'm old, too. And I have a good friend.
- So what?
- His name is Mecislav. He's Russian. He's over seven hundred years old and strong. He's very strong. Potentially even stronger than Elizabeth.
- Potentially?
- He couldn't handle her now. In the future, in three hundred years, maybe a little more or a little less, he could destroy her - and feel nothing at all. Like you, you're not as good as the portrait yet. Potentially, you're very strong. But so far you've only had the power to look Andre in the eye. The hypnosis was still working on you.
- Only until the first pain.
- Will you tell me about it later?
- I'll tell you.
- Okay. So, Mechislav. About six hundred years ago, he was able to break off all ties and become a ronin.
- By whom?
- Ronin. A loosely wandering vampire.
I didn't understand anything, and Danielle saw it. He shook his head and tried to explain it better.
- If I bite you and you become a vampire, I will be your Creator. Your creator. Your Creator. I will have power over you in life and death. Over your body, mind and soul.
It's like I've been pierced with cold.
- I wouldn't advise you to do that. I'll knock my teeth out.
- I'm just trying to explain. I would never turn you into a vampire without your consent. Unless there was another way to save your life.
He was being sincere. And I nodded. Strangely, Danielle tried not to lie to me. On the contrary, he opened up to me so I could understand when and how he felt. I wonder if that was a normal condition for him. Or is it just that you can gain some experience in three hundred years? And that experience tells him that everything he said will stay between us, and the lies will come out sooner or later. And that I won't forgive him for lying, whatever his purpose? Damn them, those vampires!
- Well, there you go. You're becoming my alunno.
- Alunno? What's that?
- People have no such idea. In Italian, "alunno" means student, but it's much more. It's much more. To be somebody's alunno means to have a creator. A vampire who will take care of you, who will teach you, who will protect you, who will punish you, who will dispose of your life - and you will not be able to resist him. What's more, you have no right to do this. Your Creator gets almost all rights to your life, your death, your mind, heart and soul, if vampires have it. He's superior to you as long as you're willing to admit it and tolerate it. Whatever your Creator has done to you is right, if it's acceptable.
- Is it acceptable?
- I picked a bad word. More like if it doesn't lead to alunno's death. And often - and even if it does lead to death. If you're a vampire, you have to survive on your own.
- That's so sweet! - I admired it. - So, what was with you is acceptable?!
This is crazy! It's cooler than S&M!
- It didn't lead to my death. Except a few days later. And at the same time, it was wrong... unfair to me! Elizabeth was angry with me - yes! But she shouldn't have done this to me for not being able to change! The Elders won't approve!
- So tell them about it! Tell them to skin these things and make a bed instead of a rug!
At that moment, I truly hated Elizabeth, the unknown to me. If I had caught that thing right now, I would have pulled the curtains and pulled her out into the sun with my hands! And let it burn in the blue flames! Rights to life and to the soul! Is there nothing else she wants?! It didn't come to me right away that I... Yes, I wanted Daniel to be my full property! But not like some Creator! It's just like a woman. Loved and loved.
Hey, Jane, are you sure you didn't hit a stump with your head? He's a vampire for a minute, and you like to get a tan! But I haven't developed my mind. Not in time. And I focused on Daniel's answer.
- I'm not strong enough to stand up to the Elders. They will think it was done for me. To rid me of my excessive softness. To make more... more of a vampire!
- How cute! Can I stand in front of them?!
Daniel's jaw literally loosened.
- You? What for?!
- For a few affectionate words," I snapped. I was caught up in a wave of pure rabies. In that state, it seemed as if I'd hit the rock with my fist and it would fly into tiny pieces. The beast from the mirror was roaring and roaring deep in my heart, and I could almost see it scratching thin glass with its claws. I don't know if it did or not, but in this state I could cling to the director of the institu
te. Big deal, vampires! Their teeth weren't grown to scare me! And they won't grow back for another thousand years! And when they do, I'm gonna kick the shit out of them! With nail guns! I didn't say it out loud, but Danielle understood me.
- Are you saying you could stand up for me to the Elders?
- I don't know if it would have helped or not, but we'd have smelled great," I sighed. - What a fool you are - more like a vampire! It's like being a tomato in a bed - either it's there or it's not! And I'm sorry, I don't think that's a lot of cruelty for you. You're a painter to the bone. If you're hardened, you'll be stronger, but weaker at the same time. There's a change - a piece of strength and cruelty for a piece of creative fire. It's not equal. There can always be someone to fight for you! But who could do it for you?
- Do you really think so?
- Do you think otherwise?!
Danielle suddenly laughed.
- It's a shame to admit your own immodesty. But your thoughts are a reflection of mine. And that's what I think. I do not agree to such a change!
I took aim, and I punched him in the cheek.
- Well, what do you agree to?
- I've already started telling you about Mieczysław. Elizabeth had him, too. But less than me. And he was much stronger. When a vampire reaches a certain level at which he can control both himself and other vampires, he can either break the connection with the Creator and keep it only with the Elders or confirm it. If he takes a second oath, he will be freer, but within the Creator's vertical of power. If he wishes to break the bond, he must be damned sure of himself. The ordeal that such a vampire is undergoing is terribly difficult. I couldn't stand it. Many vampires have died. But the volunteers are always there. Mecislav took a risk, and he won. Got his freedom. He became a ronin. He wandered alone for a long time. More than five hundred years. And then, when he swore an oath to the Elders, he began to create his own vertical of power. His alunno. He loved a place to live away from Elizabeth. Now he's the Creator himself. Though he did not become Prince. There are about fifteen vampires in his vertical, which is not enough to rule the city. But they represent a significant force.
Ring of Madness Page 16
