“No, I know what I want, and it’s still more.” I told my mom about Mark and about my idea of finding mentors for students.
“You want to open a brothel? I think it’s only legal in Nevada, honey, and then it’s state-run or something like that.”
“Oh. My. God. I don’t want to open a brothel. I want to open up a club of sorts that matches students with mentors. I’ve been giving it some thought, and it could benefit a lot of people.”
“It still sounds like sex for sale.” She picked up a stone and tried skipping it across the water, but it hit and sank.
“It’s not sex for sale. I was thinking of starting a program where the mentor pays a fee, of which a portion will go to the school. The rest goes to me so I can run the service. It’s like a dating service. I’m not offering up anyone’s parts for sale, Mom. That’s negotiated between the mentor and the student.”
Mom turned to me and gave me a yeah, right look. “We both know men in power take what they want. Who’s going to protect the girls? Who’s going to get them what they need?”
Mom was talking from a place of experience. In her day, men ruled the world. These days it wasn’t much different, but at least women were making headway in the corporate world.
“Me.”
“And what about this Mark?” She turned around and sat Indian style beside me. “He doesn’t seem to want to be involved in your plan.”
She had a point. He’d walked out on me because he was afraid of losing everything. He was willing to sacrifice me to keep the rest.
“Call me crazy, but I still want him.”
She touched my chest. “Do you want him here?” She looked down to the space between my legs. “Or do you want him there?”
The truth was, I wanted him everywhere. “Both.”
“Men don’t want to buy the cow when you give them the milk for free.”
I busted out in a laugh. That was exactly what Jennie’s mom had told her. “Haven’t you been giving away free milk for years?”
It was hard to make Mom blush, but her cheeks turned pink. “It’s different here. We specialize in cows and milk.” She lifted her shoulders.
“I want to do the same, except I want to charge men to meet the cows. Whether any milk is exchanged is not part of my business.”
“So you want to run a dating service?”
That was probably the easiest way to explain it. “Yes, I want to run an exclusive dating service.”
“I think that can work. What about Mark?”
The sun was setting, and the surrounding air took on a chill. I pulled my sweater closed and stood. “I don’t know what to do about him. I’m thinking of calling in sick Monday. Should I even show up on Tuesday?”
Mom popped up to a standing position. “I didn’t raise a quitter. You get your tail back home and show up to work when you’re expected.”
“Oh, Mom, I don’t know.”
“I do. If you want that man, you make him want you. Make him work for it. Demand more, Sandra. You’ll never be Coco Chanel if you let him treat you like Cocoa Puffs.” She grabbed my arm and rushed back toward the community.
“What’s the rush?” I said, struggling to keep up even though her strides were so short.
She stopped and pulled me in for a hug. “If we hurry, you can arrange a ride back to the city with Jason tomorrow morning.”
Chapter 11
I got out of Jason’s SUV and leaned back in to kiss his cheek. “You’re the best. Thanks for everything.” I’d hopped out of Mom’s bed and into his truck early this morning for the ride back to the city. It was odd seeing the man dressed in slacks and a button-down shirt. Somehow, clothes changed a person.
“I’ll stop by your office at five tomorrow to pick you up.” He gave me a wicked smile that told me he had every intention of helping me make Dean Hollings realize what he was missing.
“Do you think that’s a good idea? I don’t want to piss him off. I just want to make him think about what he tossed away.”
Jason cupped my cheek and gave me a warm smile. “He’s a man. We all play the game of ‘if I can’t have you, no one can.’ He won’t like me being around you.”
“He’s your species. I’ll defer to your wisdom.”
“You make it sound like men aren’t human.”
“I often wonder if that’s the case.” I reached into the back seat and grabbed my bag. “Thanks for everything you do for me.”
“I give because I can, and because you’re worth it.” He put the car in drive and pressed the gas. I watched him until his black car disappeared and then went upstairs to my apartment.
The first thing I did was check my answering machine for messages. I pressed the button and held my breath, hoping Mark had called. Sadly, there was nothing.
Next, I looked around my place. There were wine glasses on the table, and an outfit from nights ago lay in a pile in the corner. Totally out of character for a girl who liked things tidy and in order. Living a carefree life as a kid made me crave structure. I liked neat and tidy.
My life felt out of control, and that didn’t sit well with me. That meant I needed to get my house in order. I did the dishes, hung up my clothes, and—for about the hundredth time—fixed the hinge on the cabinet. I made a cup of tea and sat at my black desk, in my black and gold chair, and outlined the premise of the business now dubbed Concierge Services. I knew certain requirements had to be met. I wasn’t interested in spending my best years in prison, so it had to be modeled after something legal, like a dating or matchmaking service. Maybe I could specialize in May-December relationships. My pen found its voice on the paper, and I scribbled across the page.
There would be a substantial yearly membership fee.
Confidentiality was imperative.
Members must be upstanding citizens in the community.
There had to be an income level that must be met.
The rest of the page was filled with questions.
Must be alumni?
Marital status requirement?
Minimum pay for students?
Career field link to students?
So many questions, and so little information.
By the time I was finished, I’d talked myself into and out of this concept a dozen times. What did I know about running a business? At twenty-two, I had dreams and desires but no practical experience. Then I thought about the pet rock, and my mind was made up. I wasn’t going to let life take me by the tail; I was going to take life by the tail.
I marched into my bedroom and looked at the purple dress hanging on the back of the door. My initial reaction was to pull it down and shred it to pieces, but I wasn’t a vindictive sixteen-year-old. I was a kick-ass woman.
Mom was right. I’d show up and do my job. I’d look irresistible and act beyond reproach, and he’d realize I was worth his time.
I realized, too, though, that the question I should have asked myself was whether he was worth my time. Did I want to be his secret? Two nights ago, in almost the same breath, he’d told me I was his woman, and then told Dan I was a mentee and he was my mentor.
If Mark and I were ever to become anything, we would have to come to terms with who and what we were to each other, and that was the subject that confused me the most. I’d never been in love. Lust was a completely different subject. I’d spent the past few years in lust with many people. Jennie and I spent every Friday night lusting at some bar in the city … but love? I wasn’t sure whether the squeeze in my heart was related to the throbbing between my legs or whether it was its own thing. Maybe Jennie could shed some light on the situation. She’d been in love at least a dozen times.
I picked up the phone and called her. She answered on the third ring.
“How was the date?”
“It started well and ended not so good.”
“Oh no.”
I could hear her crunch something. Probably Funyuns—she had always had a thing for those things. Personally, I couldn’t se
e the attraction. They smelled like onions and tasted like corn. I put them into the same group as mystery meat.
Once I told her about Dan, the crunching stopped, and so did her concern about the Mark situation.
“You found me a mentor? What’s he look like? What’s he do? Will I have to put out?”
She rattled off questions faster than I could process them.
“He’s around fifty. He’s nice looking. He’s the CEO of Global Finance. As for putting out, I’m not running a brothel. I’m running a dating service of sorts. What happens after you meet is up to you.”
“When can I meet him?”
I hadn’t worked out the details, but I would soon. “Give me a week or so and I’ll figure it all out.” She’d made four dollars and thirty cents today in tips, so things were dire. “Hang in there. I’ll be in touch soon.”
After we hung up, I went in search of the business card that would change Jennie’s life. In fact, it was the card that would change many lives. She was my test run into the world of relationships. I laughed at the craziness of it all: Here I was venturing into the matchmaking business, and I couldn’t even figure out my own love life.
Chapter 12
The coffee was made and sitting on his desk by the time he arrived at 8:50.
He walked in the door and stopped. I stood next to my desk holding his calendar and wearing the purple dress he requested.
“Good morning, Dean Hollings.” I forced my voice to stay strong and professional despite the fact that I wanted to cry. The minute I saw him, all the passion and the hurt came back—strong—like an arrow through my heart. “Here’s your calendar.” I held out his schedule for the day.
“I didn’t think you would show up today.” He pulled the paper from my hand, touching my fingers along the way. The air sizzled around us. What we had together couldn’t be described—only felt.
I turned toward my desk to maintain my composure and to keep him from seeing the truth. “This is my job. I’d never dodge my responsibilities.” If not for my mother, I’d still be at Horizons, tucked next to her on the mattress in the barn. I’d be missing work to skip rocks and eat alfalfa pancakes.
He looked down at his calendar and whistled. It was a busy day. He had department head meetings every hour from ten until five. “Can we talk after work?”
I flopped in my chair and faced him. “I’d love to.” Was that hope I saw in his expression? “But I can’t.”
His attitude did a total about face, from confident to almost plaintive. “Don’t do this. We do need to talk.” He leaned toward me, and I breathed in his scent. It wrapped around me like a mink coat, all soft and warm and cozy. “Don’t punish me for Friday night.”
I wanted to slap him and hug him and comfort him and hate him and love him. Instead, I smiled. “No punishment intended. I simply have plans. Besides, you could have called if you’d wanted to talk.”
“I wanted to give you space.”
The phone rang, and I was grateful for the distraction because when it came to Mark, I was weak. If he told me to go into his office and take off my dress, I’d be lying on that soft leather couch in seconds. My legs would be spread, waiting for him.
“Dean Hollings’ office,” I said in a voice more cheerful than I felt.
He sat on the edge of my desk and watched me. My skin prickled from his perusal. It was as if he were stripping me bare with a look. He reached for a strand of my hair that had fallen from the tight bun at my neck and tucked it behind my ear.
“You look beautiful,” he whispered.
I focused on the call instead of the way his words whirled warm in my womb. “I’ll let him know. Is there anything else?” I wrote the caller’s name on a yellow memo pad and tore the sheet off. “Thanks for calling.” I placed the handset back in the cradle and turned toward Mark. “Steve Rockman would like to meet you for lunch tomorrow.” I pressed the paper into his palm.
“Are you back to scheduling my lunches so you and I have no time together?” His beautiful cocoa eyes pleaded with me. Those eyes alone could get me to do anything.
The words of Jennie and my mom echoed through my brain. He won’t buy the cow if you give him the milk for free. What Mark didn’t know was, the cost of milk had just gone through the roof. If he wanted me, he’d pay for it with his time and attention. I also wanted his respect. He’d pretty much called me a whore on Friday night, and I was no one’s whore. And even if I were, he’d never be able to afford me.
“You were here and heard the call. I didn’t initiate the meeting. He did. He wants to discuss a large donation.”
I watched Mark for a reaction. There wasn’t one. Any other day, and his eyes would have gleamed at the possibility of collecting money for his beloved school. Now he stared at me with nothing but sadness.
“We need to make time to talk, Sandra.” He rose from the desk and walked behind me. “You don’t understand my position.”
“You’re wrong. I understand everything.” Just as his hands skimmed my shoulders, his first appointment showed up.
I jumped to my feet and walked to the coffee pot. “I’ll make some fresh coffee in a minute.” I turned to Mr. Standish, the head of the mechanical engineering department, and asked, “Do you take anything in yours?”
“Nope. Black and strong is perfect.”
I pulled a box of cookies from the cupboard and placed a few on a plate. I’d made a few upgrades to Greta’s routine. All meetings came with coffee and cookies. We served real cream, not powder. And everyone who arrived was afforded a smile.
I passed the two men and entered the dean’s office, then set the plate of goodies on the table in front of the leather sofa. How many times had I been under him there with him pressed deep inside of me?
The men followed me into the office and took a seat on the same sofa I was reminiscing about. I walked to the door, and when I got there, I looked back at Mark. I knew from the look in his eyes that he was having the same thoughts as me. It would be hard for him to sit where he did and forget how many times I’d swallowed him. How many times I’d straddled him and sank myself onto his length. How many times I’d pulled a groan of satisfaction from his mouth. How many times he’d made me scream his name.
Ten minutes later, I ghosted in and left the fresh coffee, then returned to my desk. The phone rang again.
“Sandra, this is Dan. We met Friday night. I was thinking about that mentoring program you described.”
I looked around the room to make sure no one could hear me. “Hi Dan, I’m working on that for you right now. Of course, this has to be separate from the school, and it wouldn’t be right for me to discuss it while I’m on their clock.” What I didn’t want to happen was for Mark to come through the door and catch me negotiating deals he didn’t support.
“Of course.” Desperation clouded his voice. “When do you think we can discuss the specifics?”
“I’ll call you tomorrow to set up a day for us to negotiate your contract.”
I held my breath. Would he laugh at the mention of a contract? I’d thought a lot about how this would work, and a contract was a requirement. Outside of the financial particulars, there was also a confidentiality issue to address.
“That sounds wonderful. I can’t wait to meet my student. I’m hoping she’s as beautiful and articulate as you.”
“Tomorrow, then,” I said as the door to the dean’s office opened.
“Yes, tomorrow.”
Mr. Standish waved goodbye and disappeared down the hallway.
“Who was that, and what meetings have you planned for me now?” He already sounded tired, and his day had just begun.
“Just confirming your lunch with Mr. Rockman for tomorrow at noon.” I hated to lie to him, but I couldn’t tell him the truth.
Mark growled. “How much time do I have before my next meeting?” He looked at me, then at his office, and back at me.
“Five minutes. Enough time to use the restroom and get back to you
r desk.” I took a pile of correspondence I’d logged and walked to the filing cabinet. Of course, this file belonged in the lower row and required that I bend over to open the drawer. I turned my back to Mark and bent at the waist, showing him a fine view of my ass.
“You’re killing me,” he grumbled before he walked out of the office and down the hallway.
The rest of the afternoon was more of the same. His appointments arrived on time, and he growled and grouched with each one. I’d never seen a more surly man.
He rushed his four o’clock appointment out ten minutes early.
I was at the sink washing cups and preparing for the next day when he stood behind me and placed his hands on my waist. “Cancel your plans and come to dinner with me.”
“Are you ready?” We both turned to see Jason Crew enter the office. He looked past Mark, whose hands had fallen away as soon as he heard a voice, and straight at me. “I love you in purple.”
I turned off the faucet and dried my hands. “Just give me a minute to lock up, and I’ll be right with you.”
Mark looked at Jason and me. “Your plans are with him?”
I breezed past him to pick up my cardigan. “Yes. We’re old friends.”
I’d never seen Mark look so perplexed. “You know her?” He stared at Jason.
“Yes. We go back years to when she was living at Horizons.” He gave me a wink.
Jason took my sweater from my hands and set it on my shoulders. I looked at Mark, who looked like I’d tossed ice water on him. “Jason is my first mentor.” I pushed my arms through the sweater sleeves and laid my hand on Jason’s arm. “I’m ready. See you tomorrow, Dean Hollings.”
Jason walked us to the door but turned to look over his shoulder before we walked through it. “Good to see you, Mark.”
I didn’t glance back. If I had, it might have broken my heart. I’d never known him to be speechless, but Mark didn’t say another word. I hoped he was jealous and not angry. One emotion worked in my favor; the other did not.
We were halfway down the stairs when Jason began to laugh. “Did you see his expression?” We walked to the curb where he’d parked his black car. “He’s not going to let you go easy. He’s a dog who wants a bone.”
The Learning Curve Page 7
