The tightness in her chest returned when he stood and their gazes connected once more. His eyes were that darkened shade of green she’d only seen when he was angry, hurting, or—
She sucked in a breath and declared, “You can’t stay here.”
His brows rose, their arch openly challenging. “A place this big, there must be room for me…somewhere.”
She immediately pictured him in her queen-sized bed down the hall and felt a flush of heat in her face. Flickers of desire flared as erratically as her pulse. But what could she do if he refused to leave? And why would he? Refuse—that is. Flickers became flames and she feared she’d make a fool of herself.
“Fine, take the couch.” Her tone was sharper than the situation warranted, but she couldn’t help her sudden nerves. “I’ll be right back with a pillow and blanket.”
Unable to stand his heated scrutiny any longer, she brushed past to head for her bedroom on the opposite end of the apartment from Noah’s room. Thunder rumbled ominously. Just inside the door, she pressed her palms to her stomach to take a few deep breaths. She’d get through this; he was only here to drop off Noah. No matter the desire in his eyes now, he’d leave her all alone again in the morning. He was good at leaving her alone.
The thought made her chest constrict.
Get the damn pillow and get it over with.
She turned for the closet and nearly jumped out of her skin at the sight of Colton leaning against the doorframe. He’d put his dry shirt on, but that fact didn’t calm her racing pulse. When he stepped inside and shut the door behind him, anticipation and excitement threatened to overwhelm her. All she could do was watch as he advanced.
He stopped inches away. Heat emanated from his body, enveloping her like a blanket as his essence filled her senses. How did he manage to still smell like the mountains when he was over a thousand miles away in the biggest city in the country?
“Kendra, I…” He cleared his throat. “I…um…wanted to talk.”
Heart pounding, she lifted her chin to look into his eyes. “About what?”
His gaze roved over her face, then dropped lower. “Gimme a minute…I’m trying to remember.”
Her breath hitched at the flare of desire in his eyes. She caught the faint scent of mint candy he liked to suck on and a shiver of awareness coursed through her. Her eyes closed. She didn’t want to talk. She didn’t want him to leave. And she wasn’t about to ask him to again.
The light contact of his fingers as they trailed up her arms was so sensual it nearly buckled her knees. She swallowed audibly, opening her eyes in time to see his head lower. His green gaze captured hers as his mouth hovered less than an inch from her lips. His hands continued over her shoulders to the zipper at the back of her dress.
Anticipation built as he slid the fastener down with agonizing control, the sound rasping over her sensitized nerves. She wanted his kiss so bad she ached, but her breathing had grown shallow, and she wasn’t sure she could speak. Especially when he gathered the material to ease it off her shoulders.
Ever so slowly, he lowered the dress down her arms. She wanted to groan in frustration when he left her lips desolate to take a step back and watched the progress his hands made. Her nipples tightened under her lace bra. It was as if he touched each inch of skin he exposed with the intensity of his look.
His hands stilled and his eyes darkened. When he finally released her dress, it whispered down the length of her body to settle in a black pool around her feet. She stood before him in her black bra, matching bikini underwear and black heels. Exposed. In a way she’d never been before, physically or emotionally. Afraid he might read too much in her eyes, she dipped her chin, and reached forward to link their fingers together before raising their hands to chest level.
“Who is he?”
She blinked at Colton’s rough question. “Who is who?”
“The guy in the lobby,” he demanded. “Who is he?”
“A lawyer.”
His grip on her hands tightened. Based on their current relationship, she didn’t owe him any explanation. Yet a smidgeon of guilt prompted her to quickly add, “We’re setting up a charity investment plan for my trust fund. He only gave me a ride because of the rain.”
“He asked you out,” he accused, as if it were her fault.
A brief fare of indignation was doused by an unexpected realization. He’s jealous. A tremulous smile tugged her lips as she lifted her gaze once more. “I was about to say no—although, I planned to word it more politely than you did.”
He stared into her eyes, then glanced down again. “God, Kendra, I’ve never wanted anyone like I want you,” he admitted, his gruff voice lower than ever.
Her smile faded. “I might actually believe that if you kissed me.”
He gave a sharp tug on their twined fingers, drawing her against him. Then his mouth slanted across hers as if his control had snapped. She wasn’t sure if the light flashing behind her eyelids was the storm outside or her seeing the proverbial stars, but either way, she relished his powerful response and met it with her own.
A stumbling two-step backward, coupled with a half-spin and a push, buckled Colton’s knees and sat him hard on the bed. Damp denim brushed her bare thighs when she positioned herself between his legs. The resulting shiver did nothing to deter her desperate fingers from grasping the hem of his shirt while her mouth devoured the seductive curve of his lower lip. She broke the kiss just long enough to drag his T-shirt over his head and toss it to the side. Returning her mouth to his, she reached for the button of his jeans. His stomach contracted under her touch.
A negative murmur vibrated against her lips and his hands halted hers.
“Slow.”
The husky command only served to fuel the need to feel all of him against her. She’d longed for him for weeks. Maybe later they’d do it his way, but not now. Thunder rumbled long and loud as she clasped her hands behind his head and took control of the kiss until he had to drag his mouth from hers for a breath of air.
“Don’t know where you learned the definition of slow, but that’s definitely not it,” he informed her with a half smile.
Kendra held back a sigh of frustration. He wanted to go slow? Okay, fine. Leaning back slightly, she reached behind to unclasp her bra. His attention shifted from her face as she ever-so-slowly slid the silky strap down one arm an inch at a time. She took even longer with the other side. Finally, she arched one eyebrow and dangled the lacy garment in front of him by a single finger before dropping it onto his lap. “Slow enough for you?”
He never even glanced down at the lace that covered the front of his strained jeans. Instead, one large hand on her back yanked her closer while the other cupped her breast, lifting it to his mouth. She inhaled sharply at the first touch of his wet, hot tongue on her nipple, then tunneled her fingers into his hair as the throbbing ache between her legs intensified.
When he moved to the other side, she couldn’t contain the sound of pleasure that escaped from deep in her throat.
He drew the peak into his mouth and sucked. She gasped, her hands fisting in his hair as she swayed on her feet. He caught her and held her steady, but didn’t stop. Not until she wanted more and pushed him back onto the bed.
Braced on his elbows, he watched her brush aside her bra and reach to undo the button of his jeans. There was no more talk of going slow as she tugged off his boots and helped him free of the damp denim. Dropping the pants, she looked up, only to pause at the sight of his erection straining against his boxers.
For the first time since he’d entered the room, shyness overcame her. That night in Colorado, the lights had been out, and she hadn’t actually seen many details in the moonlight. Now, she was curious as hell, but embarrassed, too. He kept watching her, and the blush staining her cheeks intensified.
Colton sat up and drew her into his arms. The heat from his body warmed her all over again, and as his mouth took possession of hers, the shyness evaporated. He carried h
er around to the head of the bed. A slow slide along his body eventually put her feet on the floor. Sure fingers eased under the elastic of her black underwear, pushing them down until they slid past her thighs, and she stepped free.
His boxers were next and, in one swift motion, he stripped the comforter back and laid her down on the bed. Taking full control, he began a slow, tortuous exploration of her body with his hands and mouth. Writhing under his devout attention, impatient for the feel of him inside her, she moaned his name and pulled on his shoulders, urging him up.
Face to face again, he paused, poised above her. Stripped bare of every single defense, aching with need, Kendra’s sense of exposure rocketed to a whole new level. At the same moment he took a breath, clearly intending to speak, she saw her own naked vulnerability reflected in the gleam of his eyes and panicked. She quickly palmed his jaw, placing her thumb over his slightly parted lips.
Words would only remind her of what had been and what wouldn’t be. All that mattered was this moment.
A shake of her head added to her silent plea. Colton’s lashes lowered to conceal a heart-stopping gleam of remorse. Rough stubble abraded her skin when he turned his head to press his mouth to her palm.
You have him now. For this moment. Take what you can.
She slid her hand up to tangle her fingers in his still-damp hair and pulled his head down. Under the guise of passion rising out of control, she poured all her love into the kiss. When finally, he joined his body with hers, the storm outside paled in comparison to the emotion that overwhelmed her at the moment of her climax, followed seconds later by his.
She had only the one other experience she’d consider comparing it to, and to her amazement, this even surpassed that night in Colorado. Was it because they were married? Or because she knew she’d love him until the day she died and she feared this would be the last time she’d lay in the warmth and security of his arms?
Who says this has to be the last time? Tell him you love him.
Her pulse shot right back into overdrive. Would the casual guy who’d never wanted to get married freak out? Or did him marrying her back in Colorado mean he’d had a change of heart?
Colton eased his weight off to lie beside her, his breathing gradually becoming even. For a moment, she wondered if he’d fallen asleep, until he opened his eyes and turned on his side to look at her.
He cleared his throat. “Kendra.”
Her heart dropped into her stomach at his unhappy tone and the serious look on his face. Wishing the lights were off, she squeezed her eyes closed. But his expression remained with her. Somber eyes filled with regret. The eyes of the man who’d left her alone on the steps of the courthouse.
The eyes of a man who didn’t want to be married.
“Don’t.” She absolutely couldn’t bear it if he apologized right now.
“Kendra, I—”
“Please…don’t,” she whispered, her throat constricting painfully. She felt the mattress shift and, sure he was leaving her again, quickly opened her eyes.
She had a split second view of the sheet slipping low on his hips before the room plunged into darkness. She stared into the blackness, wanting to call him back until she realized he hadn’t left the bed, only turned out the light.
A flash of lightning revealed him on his back, arms up behind his head as he stared at the ceiling. She wished she could pillow her head on his chest, listen to the steady beat of his heart and be lulled to sleep. Another flash of light indicated the storm was strengthening and the deafening boom of thunder that followed rattled the windows and vibrated the bed. She rose up on one elbow for a better view of nature’s glory.
“Does the storm bother you?”
With the next lightning strike, she caught a gentle look on his face. She almost lied and told him it did, then realized she didn’t even want to add that little white one to the list. But it turned out she didn’t need to.
“Come here,” he said softly, touching her shoulder.
She snuggled against him just as she’d wanted to, completely conscious of their nakedness. His arm closed in as his other hand tucked her head under his chin before drawing the covers over her shoulder.
She wanted to watch the storm, lying like this next to him, but the steady beat of his heart lulled her to sleep within moments.
****
A brilliant sunrise roused Colton from restless dreams, but when he took stock of his surroundings and the skyscraper skyline through the window, he realized the evening before hadn’t been a dream at all. The crimson sky brought forth an immediate frown.
Red skies in the morning, sailor’s warning.
The last time that saying had echoed in his mind, he’d been naked then, too.
He slipped from the bed, letting his gaze linger on Kendra’s sleeping form. How fitting that this time she was naked along with him.
Quietly moving to the bathroom, he showered, shaved and dressed. Then he returned to the bedroom to sit with his back to the window, ignoring the splendid view of the rose-tinted sunlight illuminating the newly cleansed city below. He only had eyes for the sleeping beauty in her bed.
Last night he’d almost told her he loved her. That’s why he followed her; he hadn’t lied about wanting to talk. But the moment he’d entered the room, he’d been distracted by the sight of her standing in front of the bed. That and the courage robbing thought…what if he was reading the whole situation wrong? So he’d taken the easy way out and given in to his desire to hold her in his arms.
It’d been amazing. And immediately afterward, he regretted not talking to her first. Once more, he gathered the nerve to lay his heart on the line. But the moment he spoke her name, she’d looked at him with that dismayed expression, then begged him not to say anything.
Colton shifted restlessly in the chair and looked outside. There was no doubt she expected him to head back to the ranch this morning. So what if they were great in bed together and she’d simply sought comfort during the storm? Maybe to her that’s all this was—maybe he’d simply been therapy, and the thought of him reading more into it horrified her.
So, what did he say to her now? Did he really need to hang around for her to spell it out for him? The red sky mocked him and his father’s favorite saying repeated in his head as if on an endless gol’ damned loop.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Kendra woke with a smile. Stretching her arms overhead as she rolled onto her back, she couldn’t hold back a soft, satisfied purr of pure bliss. She hadn’t slept so well since…the unfamiliar slide of cool cotton sheets against her naked skin registered at the same time as the end of her thought.
…since the last time Colton made love to me.
Memories from the night before washed over her, and she turned to his side of the bed with a shy smile. It faded in a rush of disappointment. The only evidence that he’d shared her bed was the faint scent of him on the sheet and a dent in the pillow.
Raising her head to scan the room, her gaze caught the time displayed by her unused alarm clock on the dresser next to the bathroom door. Eight thirty-seven. Her eyes widened. She honestly couldn’t remember a time she’d ever slept this late. Even as a child without the insomnia, she’d been an early riser.
Looking around once more, she saw all his clothes were gone. The implication made her heart skip and propelled her from the bed. In the bathroom, a wet towel hung over the shower door. She’d slept through him showering?
After a fast shower, her towel joined his before she dressed, combed her damp hair and applied a quick swipe of lip-gloss. In the hall, she laid a hand on her stomach to ease her nerves, took a deep breath as she shook back her curls, and stepped into the kitchen with a carefree smile.
Two steps into the empty room, her determination to be casual evaporated as fast as her smile. He hadn’t even made coffee. The band around her heart tightened. He always had coffee in the morning. In the living room, the first thing she noticed was the empty space where his duffel ba
g had been.
He’d left. Just like that. No explanation, no kiss goodbye after the amazing connection they’d shared, not even a casual, ‘It’s been fun, take care now.’
Her legs felt unsteady as she made her way over to the window and braced her hands on the sill. She drew in a lungful of air, counted, and released it. Repeating the process, she wondered why it was so much worse this time. He’d left before. She’d get through it again. Right?
The ragged ache in her chest cast a long, dark shadow of doubt, but she didn’t really have a choice, especially since Noah would be up soon. She closed her eyes against the pain. Thank God for Noah; she had to take care of him.
Mechanically, she returned to the kitchen to start a pot of coffee. When it was done, she carried a cup out to the living room to wait for Noah to wake up. Prayed it’d be soon—she didn’t relish a single extra second of alone time with thoughts of Colton.
Halfway to the couch, she heard the apartment door handle rattle and stopped in alarm as the door swung open.
And there he was. All six feet three inches of him dressed in a slightly wrinkled white shirt and faded jeans with a frayed hole worn in one knee. Tears sprang to her eyes.
He didn’t leave.
Beneath the rugged tumble of his hair their gazes collided…but he wasn’t smiling. Her hands shook. Coffee sloshed over the rim of her cup and scalded her fingers. She gasped at the pain, hand jerking in reaction, and the cup slipped from her grasp to bounce on the Persian rug beneath her bare feet.
“Careful!” Colton warned, at her side in a second. He seized her wrist and lifted her hand for inspection while he simultaneously towed her toward the kitchen. “You okay?”
Mortified by her emotional response to just the sight of him, all she could manage was a mute nod.
Once at the sink, he yanked the faucet handle up, spun it to cold, and thrust her red, throbbing fingers under the cooling stream with his right hand. “Better?”
With his hand cradling hers and the tall, strong length of him pressed against her side, and the fact that he was here and not gone, she was swept right back into the maelstrom of emotion from last night. Her watery gaze locked on his left hand where it rested on the edge of the sink.
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