“Mother, you know that isn’t possible, and really, it isn’t the time to discuss this. Please, Mama. You’re making everyone most uncomfortable.”
“Please don’t censor yourself on my account, ladies. It’s refreshing to have a real conversation in an English drawing room. And since we are talking candidly, let me just say I would be the happiest man alive if your daughter agreed to let me court her. I am already completely besotted by her.”
I remember blushing. This wasn’t the first of this kind of conversation I’d had in my mother’s drawing room. But it was the first time I’d blushed.
“Well, Jack,” I said, still trying his name on for size, “even if I were to let a man court me, let alone marry him, my mother knows I cannot take my future husband’s name. It’s a condition in my father’s will. I am the last of the De Vil line, you see, and it was his wish I carry on his name. I’m sorry she misled you.”
“Well, I never really cared for my name. Lord Jack De Vil sounds a heck of a lot better than Lord Shortbottom,” he said, laughing. “Don’t you think?” And I did. I thought it sounded very well indeed. And I couldn’t have been happier to hear it. But the mood shifted in the room after his declaration. Perhaps Mama had too much to drink, or she was exhausted by Anita’s behavior, or the news of Perdita, or all of it, but she spiraled into one of her dark and brooding moods. The sort that would likely have her in her room for days, complaining of a headache. The evening ended on such a strange note, but not before Jack and I said our goodbyes in the drawing room. Mama had invented a reason to usher Anita out of the room, leaving us to part on our own.
“It was lovely meeting you, Jack,” I said, feeling so awkward about how the evening went, yet so thrilled to have finally met a man who captured my imagination.
“I hope I will be able to see you again,” he said. I shouldn’t have been surprised that he just came out and said it. He was such a direct man. So unlike the other men I was used to, endlessly talking around subjects.
“Will you be in London again soon?” I asked.
“If it meant I got to see you.” He flashed me one of his magic movie-star smiles.
“You’re not at all like the men I’m used to,” I said, almost blushing again.
“I hope that’s a compliment, Cruella. Should I invent a reason to come to London again?”
He always made me laugh, even from that very first night.
“It is the highest compliment. And I’d like it very much if you came to see me again, Jack,” I said, making him smile again.
“I know it’s early days, Cruella, but I know you feel the connection between us. You don’t seem to be a lady who suffers fools. Tell me I haven’t been foolish this evening.”
I looked at him, realizing I could fall in love with him—if I hadn’t already. “No, Jack, the very last thing I would call you is a fool.” And with that, he kissed me lightly on the cheek and wished me a good night.
All of this probably sounds foolish … unless you have fallen in love. If you have been lucky enough to have love hit you like a lightning bolt then you don’t need any convincing. It was as if my dear, sweet departed papa had tapped my mama on the shoulder and whispered in her ear to bring this man home to me. He was absolutely everything I wanted. The exception to my rule.
After Jack left, I replayed the evening over and over in my head, wondering why Mama and I spoke so candidly with him. Perhaps Jack’s cavalier American style was rubbing off on us already. I didn’t know. But what I did know was there was something between Jack and me. Something I had never expected to happen. For the first time, I was actually contemplating marriage.
But Anita had other notions.
After Jack left and my mother went sulking to her room, Anita and I stayed up chatting in my bedroom before we went to sleep. Anita had Paulie bring Perdita up to my room, and the three of us sat on my bed together. But no matter how cute and cuddly Perdita was, she couldn’t wipe the scowl from Anita’s face. I thought she was sour about having to go back to school the next day. Or perhaps she was regretting her decision to go to typing school rather than travel the world with me. I wondered if she thought I would wait around forever for her to change her mind. It was quite possible she’d seen her chance fly out the window when she saw how much I fancied Jack. But if anyone should’ve been feeling sour, it was me. Anita had acted horribly at dinner, and quite possibly ruined my chances at fixing things with my mama.
“Anita, what’s wrong with you? Why were you acting that way at dinner, needling my mama like that?”
“You see what she’s doing, don’t you?” she asked, making a pretense of playing with Perdita, though her gaze was fixed on me.
“What exactly do you think she’s doing, Anita?” I was losing patience with her. Honestly, I was starting to feel glad she was leaving the next day.
“She’s trying to marry you off. Even you can see that, Cruella,” she said, clearly trying to tick me off. I wasn’t going to take the bait.
“It’s no secret she wants to see me married. This isn’t news, Anita. She’s been parading me around all year. Besides, all mothers want to see their daughters married.”
“But does she have to be so mercenary?” she said, rolling her eyes.
“Mothers have been hunting men with fortunes for their daughters since the beginning of time, Anita. You’re a fool if you think my mother is any different. It’s her job.”
“Cruella, she’s clearly trying to get her hands on your fortune. Look how she made such a point of saying your name would be Shortbottom.” This time she had crossed the line. I was truly angry with her.
“You’d better take that back, Anita! That isn’t true. You have the wrong end of the stick!”
“I don’t think I do. I thought even you would see through your mother’s sudden interest in spending time at home, Cruella. And that comment about making Perdita into a muffler was horrifying.”
“Clearly you don’t have a high opinion of my mama if you think she was serious. And what do you mean that even I can see what she’s up to?”
“Oh, Cruella, I’ve been waiting for you to see her clearly for years. And I thought you did after the scene she made at Christmas. I’ve put up with your snobbish attitude for a long time because I love you, and because I knew in my heart that wasn’t who you really are. And you proved it at Christmas, when you started treating your staff like a family, and stopped, well, acting like your mother. I thought I had my old Cruella back. And now she’s home for one evening, and you’re back to acting like her. Defending her. It’s sad, Cruella.”
“You’re just upset that I’ve met someone! You’re jealous!” I said, getting up from the bed. And I was sure I was right. Anita had been acting strange ever since I’d asked her to travel the world with me, but once she met Jack, she’d started acting like an insolent little brat.
“Jealous of a man you just met?” She laughed. “Cruella, please think about this clearly just for one moment. This isn’t about Jack. It’s about you and your mother.”
“I do think it’s about Jack. He’s a remarkable man, Anita. Did you ever stop to think that I might actually really like him? Or that my choosing a life with him, on my own terms, pushes my mother even further away from me? I never thought I would meet a man like him, Anita. Never! He’s everything I’ve ever wanted or wished for. He’s exactly the sort of man Papa would have wanted for me. And if you can’t see that, well, then you don’t know me as well as I thought you did. I think this is about you regretting your decision, choosing a mundane life over the life you could have had with me. That’s what I think this is about, Anita.”
“Oh, Cruella. He’s funny and charming, yes, and a bit like your father. They have the same smile. But you hardly know him. Don’t let your mother manipulate you like this. Forcing you into marriage and out of your inheritance.”
“You heard him. He doesn’t mind taking my name,” I said. Looking back, I don’t even know why I was trying to defend mys
elf or my mother to an in-between like Anita. Why it was so important to me that she believed me. I suppose I still loved her.
“Why were you even talking about marriage? You just met him, Cruella. You have so many plans for yourself. You wanted to travel the world. You said you would never marry, and now in one evening everything has changed. It doesn’t make sense. It’s like your mother has some sort of hold on you, Cruella. You’ve been acting so strangely lately. Like wearing the furs she gave you somehow makes you act like her.”
I laughed. “That’s nonsense, Anita. By your logic, then, wearing the earrings my father gave me would make me act like him? None of this makes sense. My mother isn’t trying to control me. And she isn’t trying to take my fortune. It’s insulting.”
“Cruella, you saw how your mother reacted when she found out he was willing to keep the De Vil name! I don’t think she counted on Lord Shortbottom relinquishing his name so easily. He’s thwarted her plans, Cruella. And now she’s threatening you with leaving again if you keep Perdita. She’s trying to erase your father. His gifts to you, and his name!”
“I won’t give up my father’s name, Anita. I promised I wouldn’t.”
“Because you love your father, or because you love his money?” Anita was getting angrier by the moment. I couldn’t understand how she could have gotten it all so wrong. Neither of us were paying attention to Perdita, so the little beast acted out in the only way she knew how to get our attention. She peed on my fur coat! Can you believe it?
I’d had it. “Get out of my room, Anita. And take that mongrel with you!”
“Mongrel? What’s wrong with you? She’s your sweet puppy and she’s just nervous because we were arguing, Cruella.” I couldn’t believe she was defending the wicked creature.
“Bloody dog!” I said, ringing the bell. “Now the maid will have to get my coat cleaned! Hopefully it’s not ruined.”
“The maid? Her name is Jean, Cruella! Do you hear yourself?”
“I don’t care what her name is as long as she saves that coat! Now get that beast out of here! Take her downstairs, and be quiet about it. I don’t want my mama seeing the little menace upstairs.”
I remember seeing the sad look on Anita’s face when she left the room with Perdita. She looked heartbroken. I was heartbroken, too. I couldn’t believe what she’d said about my mama. To think Mama was scheming to take my money. The entire idea was scandalous, and beneath my mother. Beneath her dignity. Hunting down a man, bringing him home to meet me with the hopes I would take his name so Papa’s money would revert to her. It was out of the realm of possibility. I wouldn’t believe it.
Anita and Perdita were gone the next morning. Even though I was angry with her, part of me was sad to see Anita go. I was still stinging over the things she’d said about Mama, and still hurt she wouldn’t travel the world with me. I still loved her. But I was happy she was gone. And I was relieved she was able to take Perdita with her. As much as I cherished Papa’s gift, I knew that if I wanted to have a friendship with my mama I couldn’t keep her. My papa was gone. There was nothing I could do to bring him back. But if I wanted my mama in my life I had to do something to make her happy, to make her love me again, and the only thing I could think of was to get rid of Anita and Perdita. It broke my heart to see Perdita go, but I wasn’t going to let anything stand in the way of my relationship with my mama. Not an in-between like Anita, and certainly not a puppy.
After that, Anita and I wrote to each other less frequently. I used Perdita as an excuse to check in from time to time to see how she was faring. Anita’s letters made it clear she had made a cock-up of her life, just as I expected.
Of course, she didn’t see it that way. She was quite happy, or at least said so in her letters to me over the years. She went to typing school just as she’d planned and found herself a little flat near a park where she spent her idle time with Perdita, who by all accounts was thriving in Anita’s care. Most of our correspondences were about Perdita, with little bits of news of our own lives peppered throughout our missives. Anita eventually met that jingle-writing fool Roger, when his Dalmatian got his leash tangled with Perdita’s at the park. Can you believe it? How disgustingly adorable.
The two of them now lived in poverty with only one servant to speak of, who I could only imagine was a dumpy-looking woman, old enough to be Anita’s grandmother. Of course, that’s not how Anita described her. She said she was a sweet, older, and very jolly woman. Well, if that doesn’t sound like a dumpy old woman, then I really don’t know what would.
Besides, I honestly didn’t have much time to devote to thinking about Anita, her idiot musician, and their pair of spotted beasts. I was too busy living the life of luxury with Jack. Whatever had happened the night Mama brought him to dinner couldn’t have been all that bad, because he called on me the very next day. It wasn’t long before we became an item, and his arrival in my life just as Anita left it felt quite written in the stars.
Let me tell you about Jack. My Crackerjack! Oh, he was a handsome devil! Even more handsome than the leading men in films. He was the love of my life, and it wasn’t too long before he was my husband as well.
Jack De Vil!
Yes, duckies, that’s right, he took my name, just as he said he would. And I never thought less of him for it. All my ideas of a man not willing to take his wife’s name flew right out the window when I met Jack.
Jack joined me on my travels instead of Anita. Oh, the adventures we had together! The places we saw. The glamorous life we led. His personality could fill an entire room, so I am sure you can imagine what we were like together. We were the it couple. Always dressed to kill, always making it into the papers. Always the funniest and smartest couple at any event. We were a force of nature. It was as if Anita leaving my life changed it for the better. I was becoming the woman I was meant to be.
I was Cruella De Vil! The heiress. The lady of the manor.
And I was living my life exactly how I wanted.
I suppose you want to hear about my wedding day. Oh, but I’m so eager to jump ahead to the events that have brought me to Hell Hall, where I am now. And I want so much to share my latest plans with you. But I mustn’t skip any of my story, and what is my story without my Crackerjack?
Of course, he (and Mama) arranged the most magnificent wedding imaginable. It was a glittering affair. And Jack, well, he insisted on paying for all of it. He was sweet that way, my Jack. Always wanting to make people happy. Always showing them he loved them. And oh, how he loved me. Our wedding rivaled the royal weddings. To be honest, I do think if it was within his power he would have crowned me queen. But he did manage to make me feel like one, and not only on our wedding day. He did so for the entirety of our marriage, right up until the end. He did everything he could to ensure my happiness, from suggesting I keep Miss Pricket on as my lady’s maid to helping me make amends with my mama, and encouraging me to invite Anita to the wedding. He even helped me see where I went wrong with her.
He often suggested reconnecting with Anita, but I couldn’t bring myself to betray my mama in that way. I could never forget all those horrible things she’d said. Writing to Anita on occasion didn’t feel like betrayal, but seeing her, bringing her into my home, I felt would be the ruin of everything. Ever since I decided to marry Jack, life was magical with my mama. She had a purpose. Something to focus on. And for the first time, I was her focus. She helped Jack and me with all the wedding preparations. Of course Jack wouldn’t let her pay for a thing, but he let her have a say in all the planning, which made her sublimely happy.
We decided to make the rehearsal dinner a small affair. Just Jack, Mama, and myself. We had it at home, and Mama arranged for a lovely evening. The dining room was filled with candles and flowers. Sitting around that table where I’d had so many dinners with Anita, I have to admit I missed her that night. I wished she were there. My heart hadn’t hardened completely to Anita. There was still a soft spot for her even then. But I couldn’t
bring myself to invite her to the wedding, let alone the rehearsal dinner, even if I did feel her absence keenly. Even though I was nervous about the idea of talking with Anita again, and worried it would ruin things with Mama if I did, there was an empty space in my heart reserved for Anita.
It was going to be my last evening as an unmarried woman. Though I hadn’t been the sort of girl who daydreamed about the night before my wedding, the evening wasn’t as I had imagined. I’d always thought I would spend it with Anita.
“What’s the matter, my darling?” Jack took my hand. “You should be happy. What has you so vexed?”
“Nothing, Jack. It’s nothing. I am exceedingly happy. I promise you,” I said, but he wasn’t convinced.
“I can’t have my Cruella sad the night before her wedding. I know what’s the matter. You regret not inviting Anita.”
“I suppose I do,” I said.
“Oh, Cruella. Don’t give that girl another thought,” said my mama. But Jack didn’t agree.
“I say you call her. Call her this moment and tell her you want her there. Hell, tell her you want her in the wedding! I made sure Miss Pricket arranged a dress for her in case you changed your mind. Do it now, my love. Do it before you lose your nerve.” He was really quite convincing, my Jack. His smile always won me over.
“Do you really think she would come?” I was so excited. Jack’s goodwill and optimism were infectious.
“I do think she would come, my love. Now skedaddle and make that call.”
“I think I will!” I said as Jackson came into the room to see if Jack would like to sit in the dining room with his port while we ladies went into the drawing room.
“Yes, Jackson. I will sit in here for a spell while Cruella makes her call. Can you arrange a line for her in the sitting room? She would like to call Miss Anita,” he said. Then he gave me a big kiss right in front of Mama. (Americans. You have to love their audacity.) Mama and I left Jack to his port, and I poured Mama and myself some tea.I waited for Jackson to come back and arrange my call to Anita.
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