by H S Russell
“Good morning,” he says, his morning voice deep and sexy.
“Morning.”
He looks around the room, taking stock before focusing back on me. “Do you need anything?”
I shake my head, confused. He seems oddly considerate this morning. “Um, other than the obvious, no. I think I’m good.”
We stare at each other for a few moments before he responds. I wish I could tell what he’s thinking, but I can’t. I don’t have a clue. “Okay then. I’ll see you in a few hours.” He turns to go but then stops at the doorway and turns back. “Do you know how to play chess?”
Chess? I rear back a second, surprised at the out-of-nowhere question and the memories it brings up. In a flash, I remember the times my father and I played. Taking a steadying breath, I don’t let those bittersweet memories overwhelm me. “A little. My dad tried to teach me, but it was years ago.”
An odd look flickers across Lucas’s face as he winces at me. It’s like he’s sorry he brought it up, but I can’t figure out why that would be. “Well,” he finally says, “if you’d like to play, I can bring a set up at lunchtime and we can start a game.”
Despite my wish for him to stay away, I can’t say that the idea doesn’t sound good. Anything to break up the monotony would be welcome.
Plus if I’m ever going to get on that delivery van, I have to get out of this room first.
“Okay,” I finally tell him. “I’d like that.”
He pats the doorframe as he gives me a slight smile. “Great, see you then.”
✤ ✤ ✤
A while later, Lucas brings up the set. Lucas is patient while he reteaches me the mechanics of the game. Some of it I pick back up fairly quickly, but the nuances of it are taking more time. We pass the hours in surprisingly comfortable manner. In fact, they’ve really been quiet nice. We’ve managed to not argue or butt heads, instead settling into the roles of teacher and student. It feels good to put aside our roles of captor and captive for a time.
Or rather, it was nice. But now, after at least half a dozen games, I’m not any better than I was when I started. Which is another way of saying I’ve lost every single game to him.
“Checkmate.”
I look at the board to confirm that he’s right. Dammit! In jest, I pick up one of the few pawns I won from him and chuck it at his head. He laughs as he catches it, seemingly surprised at me. “Sore loser? I never would have pegged you as one of those, Allie.” Lucas hasn’t laughed in front of me before, I suddenly realize, his smiling face all but taking my breath away. Because of course he has a beautiful smile.
Then, in typical male fashion, he says the wrong thing. “Maybe I should make you play strip chess next time, see if that’ll help your losing attitude some.” As if the comment isn’t bad enough, he says it with a smarmy little know-it-all smirk.
Furious, I get up and stomp away, the good mood from earlier completely gone. “If you ever consistently lost at something, Lucas, you might understand what it’s like.” Would it hurt him to lose every once in a while? I know I’m being a baby, but dammit, I need a win. I need to have something to feel good about, even if it’s a stupid game of chess.
His smile slowly fades from his face, making me sorry for my outburst. His smile was truly wonderful. Maybe if I’d stopped sneaking peeks at his handsome face I would have played a little better, I grouse to myself. Maybe I should ask him to try to ugly himself up a little bit. It might help.
His quiet voice carries across the room, surprising me. “You think I’ve never lost before, Allie?”
Not over my fit, my bad temper still leads the way. I spread my arms out to take in the spare room that’s now my home. “Look around you, Lucas. You have what looks to be a beautiful house. You have a career that, while completely illegal, appears to be quite lucrative. You’re handsome, which probably gets you any woman you want. You’re charming, fit, and despite having kidnapped me, you seem relatively intelligent. And at the moment, you have complete control over me and my life. You’ve taken everything away from me. I’m at your complete mercy.” I take a deep breath. “So yeah, I think you don’t know what it’s like to lose, or to be at someone else’s mercy.”
His expression sobers as he listens to me. I know that I’ve now effectively killed his good mood as well as my own. I’m instantly sorry for it and the tension I’ve caused, but I refuse to apologize. Knowing this whole thing is just ridiculous, I turn away but not before I see him frown at me.
“Is this how your father allowed you to behave when you lost? Maybe he should have spanked your ass more.”
His comment is so surprising that it stops me in my tracks. Turning back, I glare at him. “My father is dead,” I tell him through a clenched jaw.
“I know. Your mother is too. I know everything about you, Allie.”
I take a step back, feeling like I’ve been physically pushed. “You know? How could you possibly know?”
Lucas grimaces and rakes a hand through his hair, then holds the back of his neck with one hand. It’s obvious he doesn’t want to answer my question.
“How, Lucas,” I ask him, taking a step forward. “How do you know that? And what else do you think you know?”
He watches me as if gauging me for something before answering. “I looked into you, Allie. I know everything about your life. Your situation.”
“What?” I whisper, already starting to feel invaded. “My situation?”
“Your parents were John and Alice Jenson. Your father was an engineer, your mother a lab technician. You’re an only child who was orphaned when your parents were killed in a car crash that wasn’t their fault your junior year of high school. You were traumatized by their deaths and became a shadow of who you were before they died. You lived with neighbors before heading off to college, a couple you’re not close with, but in college you began to come out of your shell. You graduated with honors and have been working as an engineer since graduation. You’re well liked by your coworkers, but most of your close friends live far away. My guess is that you keep people away so that if—when—you lose them, it won’t hurt so bad. You’ve had a small handful of boyfriends, none of them worthy of you.”
He goes on to tell me my bank account number, my salary, my 401K balance, what kind of birth control I’m on, and then lists all the vehicles I’ve owned. He touches on my favorite restaurants and all of the places I’ve lived. It’s as if every part of my life has been invaded by him, all without my permission.
I stare at Lucas, watching his mouth move has he strips me bare with his words, tears threatening at the overwhelming sense of invasion. I’ve never felt so exposed or vulnerable in my life.
“How…” I start, but he interrupts me as he comes toward me.
“Did you seriously think I wouldn’t learn everything about you? That I wouldn’t dig into every aspect of your life?” He cares nothing about how this makes me feel, and just like that, in the blink of an eye, I’m once again reminded who Lucas is. He’s my captor. Not my captor, not my lover…he’s my kidnapper.
I head into the bathroom before he can see the tears fall. “Get out,” I tell him, hoping for once he’ll do as I ask.
“Allie,” he calls out. I don’t know if he comes after me or not. I barely make it to the toilet before I’m leaning over and throwing up everything in my stomach. Once I’m done, I clean myself up and go back out to an empty room. Crawling into bed, I close my eyes and let sleep take away my pain.
Chapter 10
Lucas
I knew as soon as I started talking that I was going too far. Telling her everything I know about her was a tactical mistake. A critical one. My goal is her compliance, her allegiance, and I was making progress. Then I teased her about being a poor loser, and everything went to hell from there.
I watch her on the video feed, wondering what to do next. After she got sick, she’d gone to bed and slept a good part of the day. She’s been up for a while now, stalking around the room, at times
shooting the chess set looks that are sometimes angry and sometimes sad.
Frustrated, I get José on the phone and explain the situation.
“What exactly is your endgame, Lucas?” he asks.
“I want to stack the deck, José. I want us to plant every bit of evidence we can against her, but I also want to get her on our side so she won’t want to go to the authorities.”
“You want to manipulate her feelings so she falls for you?”
“If that will buy us another level of allegiance, yes.”
“You want to take her to bed?”
“Of course I do. I’m a guy, and she’s a challenge.” Plus it’s been a while, but I don’t mention that. He’s smart enough to know that having a little captive in my house does not allow for much in the way of seduction.
He sighs and I know he’s shaking his head at me. “She’s not exactly your type, Lucas. In fact, she’s the exact opposite of what you normally go for.”
“I know, but I’ll take one for the team if I need to.” I’m smiling, but even as the words leave my mouth, I realize how mean they sound.
José is silent for a few moments, like he knows I realize I’ve stepped over a line. “Have you considered that instead of trying to take her to bed, you befriend her instead? A scorned ex-girlfriend could have dire consequences. But if you make her a friend, then your parting wouldn’t upset her so much.”
I get up and start pacing as I think over his advice. “You’re telling me to friendzone myself?”
José laughs. “You’ll survive. And yes, that’s exactly what I’m saying. Plus since she isn’t your type, there’s less chance of you hurting her if you sleep with her.”
I know he’s right, but there’s one problem. “I like her,” I tell him, surprising myself as the words spill out of my mouth as if someone else is speaking. “She’s real. There’s nothing fake or artificial about her. Her reactions are honest, like she’s not interested in playing games.” Well, accept for admitting to wanting me. She hasn’t given in to that yet, but given her situation, it’s not unexpected.
“Then perhaps friendship is the way to go.”
“Do you think men and women can be friends?”
“For some men, yes. But you see her as a challenge, so I’m not sure. But it would be in everyone’s best interest if you kept it in the friendzone.”
“Aren’t you the one that told me to seduce her?”
“It seemed like a good idea at the time.”
“Yeah, it did.” I stop pacing and head back to my desk. “Regardless, what’s your advice on how to get back on her good side.”
“Despite having kidnapped her and holding her against her will?”
Smart-ass. “Yes, despite that.”
“She’s told you what you need to do. You need to give her some freedom. She’ll think you’re doing it to make up for earlier, but it’ll make her lower her guard faster if she feels like you’re sorry.”
I am sorry for hurting her. I never dreamed my words would cause such a strong reaction.
“It means something to women when men spend time with them,” José continues. “That’s all you have to do. That, and apologize. An apology will go a long way toward fixing this.”
“I’m not fucking apologizing.”
“Try, Lucas. Be charming, dammit. This is our lives you’re playing with, hers and ours. Surely even you can play nice for once.”
“Fuck you,” I grumble, but I hear him laughing as I disconnect the call.
Too restless to sit still, I start pacing again. José said to apologize to Allie, but that’s not who I am. I don’t apologize. I haven’t since I told my dad I was sorry after I’d gotten caught swiping a copy of the test. Besides, I’m not wrong to have done what I did.
And that’s when it hits me. I’m down here thinking I haven’t done anything wrong, when everything I’ve done to Allie is the very definition of wrong.
I’m an idiot to sit here and feel this self-righteous. José is right. Allie deserves an apology. She’s truly innocent in all of this, yet she’s paying the highest price of all. I pull up the feed again, watching her as she stares moodily out the window. I don’t like the way her shoulders slope inward, as if she’s caved under the weight of something too heavy to carry.
I don’t like seeing her look so beaten. While I want her obedience, I don’t want her to lose that fighting spirit of hers. Determined to help her get it back, I head up the stairs before I can change my mind.
I knock on the door to let her know I’m coming in, but she doesn’t turn away from the window when I close the door behind me. She doesn’t acknowledge me at all.
Letting instinct guide me, I walk over and gently turn her by her shoulders. Cupping her cheek so she’ll look at me, I meet her red-rimmed eyes. Some part of me clutches in remorse for putting that lost look on her face and making this sweet, innocent girl cry.
I lean down until my lips are barely pressing against hers. “I’m sorry,” I whisper, closing my eyes as I wait to see if she’s going to push me away. When she doesn’t, I lean into kiss her, gentler than I’ve ever kissed any woman before. I keep the pressure light, nonthreatening.
For a kiss that’s not passionate, it still knocks me to my knees by how much it makes me yearn for more.
Still holding her face in my hands, I feel Allie’s hands finally reach out to grab my biceps to hold herself steady. I hear her little intake of breath as her fingers tighten on my arms. I want to take this further, to press more to see how far she’d let me go, but I remember that I have a goal here, so instead, I pull away.
It’s a few seconds before she opens her eyes and looks at me. Her look isn’t nearly as dazed as before, which makes me confident of my attempts to get on her better side again. Even more than that, though, the defeated look she’s been carrying around is leaving. I lean my forehead against hers, my hands still holding her soft cheeks. “It’s easy for me to forget your point of view in all of this. You were right earlier. I don’t often lose, and I’ve forgotten what it feels like.” I pull away to look at her again. “But you were wrong too. I have lost before, but it’s been a very long time since it’s happened. And I’d vowed to never let it happen again.”
Allie’s hands fall from my biceps, and I take a step back to give her some room. She takes a deep breath, then straightens her shoulders a little more, seeming to rally herself. I’ve never felt so proud of someone in my life.
“I don’t like that you know all of that about me,” she finally admits.
I walk over and grab her a water, opening it before handing it to her, giving myself some time to figure out the best way to say this without harming our tentative truce. “I know you don’t. But you’re smart enough to realize that it’s something I would do given this situation. I shouldn’t have spilled all of that out to you like I did. You didn’t deserve that.”
“I don’t deserve any of this, Lucas.”
Feeling a moment of guilt, I want to look away, but she deserves for me to look her in the eyes. “I know, Allie. You’re innocent in all of this. I’ll try to keep that in mind from now on.”
“Thank you.” She glances over to the chess set. “But maybe we forgo the chess for a while.”
“Agreed.” I grin at her. “How are you at poker? That can be a fun game for two.”
Allie laughs and pushes away from the window. “I cannot believe you’d even joke like that after you’ve just apologized for your bad behavior.”
I slide my hands in my pockets, still grinning. “I’m a guy. I’m always going to try to go there.”
I watch a blush spread over her skin. I love how she can’t hide the effect I have on her. That telltale blush makes me feel confident that I haven’t ruined everything with her. That I’m getting her back to where I want her. “I’ll be back later today. You good until then?”
She looks around the room and nods. “I am, thanks.”
I want to lean in and kiss her on the cheek, bu
t I hold back in case it’s too much, too soon. I have to keep the endgame in mind.
“Then I’ll see you in a while.”
Chapter 11
Allie
I look over at Lucas, my gaze caressing his handsome albeit severe face.
For once, he’s not looking severe because he’s angry at me. He’s intent because he’s helping me look for a specific puzzle piece that I’ve been searching for for hours already.
Puzzle piece, as in jigsaw puzzle. Lucas is helping me with a jigsaw puzzle.
The morning after he apologized to me, he surprised me by coming in with a one-thousand-piece jigsaw puzzle. Later, when he saw me working on it on the floor since I’d had nowhere else to lay it out, he brought up a card table along with two folding chairs.
Now, here we sit in our little folding chairs, our heads only inches apart as we look for a specific piece.
A piece I found over an hour ago.
But he doesn’t need to know that.
Finally feeling my gaze on him, Lucas glances up at me. “All these puzzle pieces are looking the same,” he grouses.
I look down at the scattered pieces, biting my lips between my teeth to keep the grin back. “You got a black, gray, and white M. C. Escher puzzle, Lucas. Of course they look the same. There’s only three basic colors and—” I put my pinky up to the corner of my lips to do my Dr. Evil impression. “—one thousand pieces.”
Lucas laughs before putting his head back down. “Maybe next time I’ll get one with some color,” he mutters. “One with cats or something. You’re single—you like cats, right?” he asks, looking up at me with a smarmy grin.
I can’t help the small grin in response. “Are you insinuating that I’m a cat lady? I’ll have you know that I’m only thirty-one.”
One corner of his mouth scoot upward. “I’m well aware. When was the last time you went on a date? And how many cats do you have? Or wish that you had?”
I roll my eyes at him. “I’m not a cliché, at least not yet. And my dating life is none of your business. Besides, if you want to know badly enough, I’m sure you and your goons can find out.”
