Stealing Allie

by H S Russell

  For once, they do as they’re told.

  I walk the lonely halls, missing her. I miss her so damn much I can barely stand it. For the last eleven months I’ve thought of that woman as mine. She’s practically all I’d thought about. Finding her, getting my revenge, fucking her into loving me…

  Now that everything between us is settled, I still think only of her. But she wants me to leave her alone, so I leave her alone.

  Two Months Gone

  Lucas

  I lasted a little over a month and a half before I started looking for her again, telling myself that I just needed to know she was okay.

  Not sure if she’s still hiding from me, I start with her alias. Bean finds her—once again—pointing out the obvious. She was back in her apartment. She even had a job at the same department, minus the on-site calls. I’d have lost my ever-loving mind if she was back to doing that.

  Once I took in the fact that she isn’t hiding, I start doing what I always did before: I watch her, settling into the habit, a junkie for her, my drug. I watch her going to and from work, proud of her for still hitting the gym. There are a hundred different times I want to get out of my SUV and bash in some guy’s head for looking at her wrong, but I take comfort when I see that Allie doesn’t even notice them checking her out.

  She looks lost…sad. Could she possibly be missing me the way I’m missing her? I think she does. In fact, after watching her for a week, I’m sure of it. Does she realize it though? Has it hit her that the reason she looks so dispirited and wan is because I’m not there to stir her up?

  Part of me wonders if she seriously thinks I won’t come for her, or that we’re ever going to be over. There’s no way in hell this thing between us is over.

  I just don’t know why she hasn’t figured that out yet.

  But she will, because I’m going to get her. And this time, I’m going to keep her. We’ll talk and I’ll make her see that I need her and that she needs me. Then, if reasoning doesn’t work, I’ll remind her the good old-fashioned way of where she belongs and who she belongs to.

  Then, if she’s still resistant after I’ve fucked her into a hundred orgasms, I’ll lock her in her room for the next fifty years or so.

  Either way, I’m getting my Allie back.

  Two Months Gone

  Allie

  It’s Tuesday, two months to the day that I left, and I still miss him. I’m still in love with him. It infuriates me that I could be in love with someone who held me captive, hunted me, and then used me so ruthlessly.

  And who’s now made me late.

  I’m late and I don’t know what to do. Do I tell him? Do I even want him to know? Or do I keep this to myself and hope he never finds out? He doesn’t deserve to know, not after what he did. And god knows his world is no place for a family. Besides, I remind myself, he hasn’t come for me. If he wanted me, he’d come for me.

  Thoughts of Lucas and the baby going round and round my head as I walk to my car, I never sense anything’s wrong until I feel an arm grab me around my waist and hustle me to the street. I gape in shock but barely have time to react before I’m dumped into an SUV. A very familiar-looking SUV.

  Lucas.

  I look at him, my jaw open, speechless at what is happening. He gives a “Thank you, man” to the person who nabbed me and is buckling my seat belt, while Lucas and I eye each other and the differences that two months have made.

  He looks good, damn him, but rough. Like he hasn’t slept. His hair is unkempt, his face has scruff—which is really pretty hot—and his clothes are kind of wrinkled. Very unlike him.

  He hits the door locks, slaps on the blinker signal, and pulls into traffic.

  “Allie,” he says, calm as you please, in a voice neither apologetic nor repentant. “It’s good to see you again.” He speaks like we’re mere acquaintances having lunch. As if he hasn’t just grabbed me off the street and tossed me into his car.

  I finally break out of my trance and find my voice—my very loud voice. “Lucas, what the fuck are you doing?” I reach over and start slapping at him, not caring that he’s driving. He’s a big boy; he can multitask.

  The rat bastard doesn’t even try to hide his grin as I’m going ballistic on him. His obvious glee only makes me hit him harder.

  “What do you think you’re doing?” I screech, getting a good jab in near his ear. He’s just fast enough to grab and hold my wrist.

  “Fuck, Allie, what do you think I’m doing?” He glares at me as if the answer isn’t completely obvious. “I’m fucking kidnapping you, woman.”

  A thrill goes through me, but I know better than to believe him. This man has a lot of making up to do before any of this is happening.

  “Woman?” I parrot, trying to yank my wrist free. “Don’t you woman me. I’m not your woman, Lucas Rutherford Grayson!”

  Oh but I am, my heart sings, I am. I tell it to shut up.

  He’s smiling like a fool. “Damn I’ve missed you…woman.” His eyes rove over me quickly. “You look amazing. I like your new work clothes.”

  I’d gone shopping for a whole new set of clothes when I got home. I’d had to with all the weight I’d lost. I tried to tell myself with every purchase I made that the sleek, sexy clothes weren’t being purchased with Lucas’s tastes in mind.

  His comment makes me growl in return, literally growl. “You. Cannot. Be. Serious!” But I stop struggling, because why. We both know it was a token beatdown at best.

  “Are you going to come willingly, or do I need to get the syringe?” he asks me, looking briefly in his rearview mirror. “’Cause there’s a red light coming up, so I only have a small window of opportunity here if that’s what you prefer.”

  I finally yank my wrist free and put my head in my hands to calm down and gather my wits. I feel the vehicle slow to a stop while I’m counting to ten.

  “Okay, syringe it is,” he says as I feel him reach behind him.

  “No!” I shout, my head popping up from my hands. “Don’t. I’ll stay, I promise. I’ll do anything, but no drugs.” I don’t say anything about the baby, but he seems to take me for my word and leaves the drugs wherever they are.

  He maneuvers us through traffic, both of us quiet until after he’s merged onto the interstate.

  “Where are you taking me?” I finally ask, refusing to look at him.

  “I’m taking you home and locking you in your room until you give me what I want.” He gives me a side-eye look. I know this because I’m giving him the side-eye as well. “Unless we can skip over that part and you just give it up to me now.”

  Not his room? “My room?” My hopeful heart deflates. “And give you what exactly? I don’t have any more of the money. And I’m not paying back the little bit I used. You owe me that much for what you put me through.” I snort. “More, actually.” He’s just lucky I didn’t take his ass to civil court.

  He shakes head, never discerning my thoughts. “You know exactly what I want, little girl. Don’t play stupid. We’re way past that.”

  I keep looking out the window. Ten minutes ago I was walking down the street, moping about how I miss him and still love him and blah blah blah. Now I’m in his car and he’s taking me to his home. All my dreams are coming true, but I don’t know why he’s doing this. If it’s out of a need for more revenge…

  I can’t even go there. It would hurt far too much. I have to stop this, right now, and there’s only one way for me to do that. Just as I’m about to play my get out of jail free card, Lucas asks me a question first.

  “Did you steal Mrs. Dorsey’s car? It was registered to her, not you,” he finally asks. His question takes me by surprise. Of all the things, that’s what he wants to know first? I sigh, not bothering to hide my disappointment.

  “I bought it for her with your money. She agreed to keep it ready for me if I ever needed it.”

  He rubs a hand over his mouth and jaw. “That car was there the whole time? You hid the fob in your apartment?”

/>   “Yes, the car was there the whole time. She drove it, but yes. The fob wasn’t in my apartment; I hid it in the building.” Forethought that paid off for me.

  “So the whole time I was there, if you’d managed to get out the apartment door, you’d have been able to get in the car and leave.” It’s not a question, because he’s not really asking me, but I answer him anyway.

  “Yeah.” I shrug. “Pretty much.” I look out the window again, thinking. “I don’t know why I didn’t. I had a chance that first night when I slept on the couch, but I wasn’t prepared. I figured there would be other chances.”

  The admission startles him. “Damn, that’s right, you almost got out that first night,” he says quietly, as if he’s forgotten that night. I blush at the memory of everything he did and said to me, before and after I made a break for it. He must be remembering it as well because he adjusts himself.

  Debating on whether to tell him now, or never, he interrupts my thoughts. “Don’t say anything else, okay? Let’s get to the house, and then we can talk as long as we need. Hash all of this out once and for all.”

  I know I should protest if only on principle, but I’m tired of fighting this. Of fighting him. Plus his suggestion actually sounds kind of nice.

  “Okay,” I agree. He reaches over and puts his palm on my thigh, keeping it there for the remainder of the forty-minute drive. Beyond that touch, we don’t interact while we’re going back to the beginning, or almost the beginning. One year later, we’ve come full circle.

  Chapter 40

  Lucas

  She didn’t leave. She could have left that very first night, but she didn’t. There were other times she could have snuck out—I can think of at least five. But she didn’t.

  Did she stay because she felt that same pull that I did? Because she wanted me? She told me that one time in bed that she didn’t want to leave, but it wasn’t long after that before I’d done what I did, so I hadn’t thought much of it. Now, I’m hoping there’s a meaning to her having stayed in the apartment, willingly.

  She walks slowly through the house, looking around even though she’s seen this part before. I’ve taken her to the rooms where we had our first kiss, and our first fight.

  I hope to god that all those firsts don’t turn out to be the lasts as well.

  Heading to my office, we sit down in our familiar chairs, facing each other. She seems awkward, nervous at being here, at being around me.

  This won’t do.

  Going to her, I pull her out of her chair and seal my lips on hers. I kiss her like I’ve dreamed of kissing her these last two months—deep and long and hungry. She opens her mouth for me—to me—and I taste her while I pour out my heart through this kiss.

  After a few moments of tasting and feeling each other, we pull away and sit back down. The awkwardness is lessened, just as I’d wanted.

  “I came for you today because this is where you belong, Allie. It’s where you’ve always belonged. Surely you feel the same way.”

  She hesitates for only a second. “No, I don’t. I wasn’t a welcome guest here, Lucas, remember? I was a nuisance that you never wanted.”

  The words I once said to her come back to haunt me.

  “You quit being a nuisance long before you ever left.”

  “I did? Then when was it exactly? When did you start feeling differently?” She gets up, not letting me speak. “This is ridiculous. Take me home or call me an Uber. I’m not doing this with you.”

  I stand up as well. “Oh hell no. You’re not leaving until we get this shit sorted. You knew I felt something for you.”

  She snorts. “Oh sure, a massive boner.”

  “Goddammit, Allie, it was more than that.”

  “Okay, fine, whatever. It was more than that. But how will we ever trust each other in the here and now? How do I know you’re not doing this out of some sort of sick one-upsmanship revenge? How will you trust that I won’t pretend to care only to turn you in to the authorities?” she asks.

  With nothing more to lose, I trust my gut and go for broke. “Because this isn’t about revenge. That part is done.” When her beetled brow doesn’t smoothen, I know I still haven’t said the right words. “The revenge was over before you left your apartment two months ago. And I can’t help but think that you knew it when you were leaving. You left to punish me, pure and simple. But whatever, it’s over.”

  The memory of her leaving me makes me angry all over again, but I keep my calm. “I’m not worried about you turning me in because I trust you. I trust you because that’s what people do when they love each other, Allie. They trust each other.”

  She jerks back and plops down in her seat, wide eyes staring up at me.

  I’d laugh if this wasn’t so serious. “I fucking love you,” I tell her. “I have for longer than you might imagine.” I get down on my knees in front of her chair, reaching for her hand. “I want to be with you, and I want you here with me.” I wait, my heart bleeding out with every second that goes by. “Talk to me, Allie. Tell me you care for me, that you might even love me. Tell me there’s hope…”

  “But…you.” She looks at me, obviously confused. “You were playing me at my apartment. That’s what you told me. I don’t understand, Lucas.”

  I sigh, knowing this would come back to bite me in the ass. I just hope it doesn’t ruin us forever. “The only part that I lied about was the part where I said I’d been lying all those times I was showing you how much I cared.” I look down and rub my hands down my face. I’m confusing myself with this; heaven knows how confused she must be. I have to find a way to explain this better.

  “The money became a symbol for me—a symbol of defeat—a symbol of you leaving me after I’d opened myself up to you here at the house. I was humiliated, Allie. I had feelings for you, real feelings, and you left me and took the money. I needed the revenge to balance the scales, even though they were already weighted in my favor. But all of that was just an excuse to go after you, to get you back.” I hope my words are making sense to her, so afraid that I’m making things worse. “I used the denial to get you to break, and when you didn’t break, I started throwing out anything I could think of. You started to respond when I turned mean, so I went there with you. When I was standing over you, telling you that I’d been lying the whole time, that was the lie, Allie. I’m a sick, mean bastard when I need to be, but I promise you that I was lying when I said all of that. And I’ll never do that to you again. Ever. I love you, Allie. I swear to you on my mother’s grave, I love you.”

  She sits back in her chair, stunned. “Why didn’t you tell me that you’d lied after you’d gotten the money?”

  I groan out a small, insecure laugh. “God, Allie, I thought you knew. I thought you’d figured it out, or would figure it out. It didn’t occur to me that you still believed all of that. When you left, I thought it was you punishing me again. And damn if I didn’t deserve to be punished.”

  She crosses her arms over her chest, some of her fight coming back. God, she’s adorable. “You could have said something when I was still upset.”

  “I wanted to, but you were so fragile, so vulnerable. I was afraid anything I said would make it worse. Plus I’m a guy, so denial is always the go-to response.”

  Her eyes fill with emotion, so she stands up and starts pacing. She’s got the back of her hand on her forehead. “I can’t believe this…”

  I twist around so I can watch her. She doesn’t look as happy as I’d thought she’d be. In fact, she doesn’t look happy at all. And are those tears? I wasn’t expecting tears. Not sad tears at least. A happy tear would have been okay.

  “Allie, you know you and I are good together, that we belong together. We have something, you and I, and I want it. I want it all. With you.”

  She stops her pacing and shakes her head no. I sit down in the chair she vacated, stunned that I’d misread her so completely.

  “Allie, what…”

  “No.” Her words and those tear
y eyes fill me with dread. “Do you realize I’ve never seen your bedroom?” The tears fall faster now as she struggles to speak through her emotion. “I don’t know where you sleep, Lucas. I don’t know what you like to eat, or where you grew up. I don’t know what your closet looks like, or who your best friends are.”

  I shake my head at her, confused. “I’ll show you…tell you right now. Let’s go and—”

  “No, you don’t understand, Lucas,” she says, taking another step away from me. “You say you loved me all this time, but I know nothing about you other than your mom dying when you were ten. I don’t know what you really do for a living, or how many people you’ve stolen from…how many innocent people you’ve harmed. Have you kidnapped other women? Are you in with the mob or the black market? Do you traffic women or sell drugs?” She stands by the door leading to the pool. “I don’t even know how you take your coffee or what side of the bed you sleep on.” She pierces me with those glittering eyes. “I know nothing about you. You’ve given me nothing of yourself. Just sex and lies and…nothing.”

  I start to smile because I think she’s joking—then I realize she’s not. She’s serious, and she is seriously upset about these things that don’t mean anything. I don’t get it…

  “You never even gave me the courtesy of a house tour. You outright refused me when I wanted to see it. I’d been here for weeks, but I wasn’t worth enough to show me your life. You know everything about where I lived, and I know nothing about your home.” She uses her palms to wipe the tears off her cheeks. “God, Lucas, I don’t even know if you want kids or not…and here you think we know each other enough to have a future? I’m sure it makes sense to you because you don’t have any of these questions about me; you know all the answers. You know all these things because I answered your questions. But to me, you’re a stranger. A stranger I’ve had crazy sex with. We’re enemies with benefits, nothing more than that.”

  “Allie,” I murmur, trying to placate her enough so she’ll listen.