by Anne Rice
"No, you care, " he said, smiling. He was deeply fascinated. "You're just confident that it's going to be exciting, and that whatever the battle, you'll win. " I bowed my head. I laughed. I slipped my hands into the pockets of my pants the way mortal men did in this day and age, and I walked on through the grass. The field still smelled of sun even in the cool California night. I didn't tell him about the mortal part, the vanity of wanting to perform, the eerie madness that had come over me when I saw myself on the television screen, saw my face on the album covers plastered to the windows of the North Beach record store. He followed at my side.
"If the old ones really wanted to destroy me, " I said, "don't you think it would already be done? "
"No, " he said. "I saw you and I followed you. But before that, I couldn't find you. As soon as I heard that you'd come out, I tried. "
"How did you hear? " I asked.
"There are places in all the big cities where the vampires meet, " he said. "Surely you know this by now. "
"No, I don't. Tell me, " I said.
"They are the bars we call the Vampire Connection, " he said, smiling a little ironically as he said it. "They are frequented by mortals, of course, and known to us by their names. There is Dr. Polidori in London, and Larnia in Paris. There is Bela Lugosi in the city of Los Angeles,, and Carmilla and Lord Ruthven in New York. Here in San Francisco we have the most beautiful of them all, possibly, the cabaret called Dracula's Daughter, on Castro Street. " I started laughing. I couldn't help it and I could see that he was about to laugh, too.
"And where are the names from Interview with the Vampire? " I asked with mock indignation.
"Verboten, " he said with a little lift of the eyebrows. "They are not fictional. They are real. But I will tell you they are playing your video clips on Castro Street now. The mortal customers demand it, They toast you with their vodka Bloody Marys. The Dance of les Innocents is pounding through the walls. " A real laughing fit was definitely coming. I tried to stop it. I shook my head.
"But you've effected something of a revolution in speech in the back room as well, " he continued in the same mock sober fashion, unable to keep his face entirely straight.
"What do you mean? "
"Dark Trick, Dark Gift, Devil's Road-they're all bantering those words about, the crudest fledglings who never even styled themselves vampires. They're imitating the book even though they condemn it utterly. They are loading themselves down with Egyptian jewelry. Black velvet is once again de rigueur. "
"Too perfect, " I said. "But these places, what are they like? "
"They're saturated with the vampire trappings, " he said. "Posters from the vampire films adorn the walls, and the films themselves are projected continuously on high screens. The mortals who come are a regular freak show of theatrical types-punk youngsters, artists, those done up in black capes and white plastic fangs. They scarcely notice us. We are often drab by comparison. And in the dim lights we might as well be invisible, velvet and Egyptian jewelry and all. Of course, no one preys upon these mortal customers. We come to the vampire bars for information. The vampire bar is the safest place for a mortal in all Christendom. You cannot kill in the vampire bar. "
"Wonder somebody didn't think of it before, " I said.
"They did think of it, " he said. "In Paris, it was the Theatre des Vampyres. "
"Of course, " I admitted. He went on:
"The word went out a month ago on the Vampire Connection that you were back. And the news was old then. They said you were hunting New Orleans, and then they learned what you meant to do. They had early copies of your autobiography. There was endless talk about the video films. "
"And why didn't I see them in New Orleans? " I asked.
"Because New Orleans has been for half a century Armand's territory. No one dares to hunt New Orleans. They learned through mortal sources of information, out of Los Angeles and New York. "
"I didn't see Armand in New Orleans, " I said.
"I know, " he answered. He looked troubled, confused for a moment. I felt a little tightening in the region of the heart.
"No one knows where Armand is, " he said a little dully. "But when he was there, he killed the young ones. They left New Orleans to him. They say that many of the old ones do that, kill the young ones. They say it of me, but it isn't so. I haunt San Francisco like a ghost. I do not trouble anyone save my unfortunate mortal victims. " All this didn't surprise me much.
"There are too many of us, " he said, "as there always have been. And there is much warring. And a coven in any given city is only a means by which three or more powerful ones agree not to destroy each other, and to share the territory according to the rules. "
"The rules, always the rules, " I said.
"They are different now, and more stringent. Absolutely no evidence of the kill must ever be left about. Not a single corpse must be left for mortals to investigate. "
"Of course. "
"And there must be no exposure whatsoever in the world of close-up photography and zoom lenses, of freeze-frame video examination-no risk that could lead to capture, incarceration, and scientific verification by the mortal world. " I nodded. But my pulse was racing. I loved being the outlaw, the one who had already broken every single law. And so they were imitating my book, were they? Oh, it was started already. Wheels set into motion.
"Lestat, you think you understand, " he said patiently, "but do you? Let the world have but one tiny fragment of our tissue for their microscopes, and there will be no arguments anymore about legend or superstition. The proof will be there. "
"I don't agree with you, Louis, " I said. "It isn't that simple. "
"They have the means to identify and classify us, to galvanize the human race against us. "
"No, Louis. Scientists in this day and age are witch doctors perpetually at war. They quarrel over the most rudimentary questions. You would have to spread that supernatural tissue to every microscope in the world and even then the public might not believe a word of it. " He reflected for a moment.
"One capture then, " he said. "One living specimen in their hands. "
"Even that wouldn't do it, " I said. "And how could they ever hold me? " But it was too lovely to contemplate-the chase, the intrigue, the possible capture and escape. I loved it. He was smiling now in a strange way. Full of disapproval and delight.
"You are madder than you ever were, " he said under his breath. "Madder than when you used to go about New Orleans deliberately scaring people in the old days. " I laughed and laughed. But then I got quiet. We didn't have that much time before morning. And I could laugh all the way into San Francisco tomorrow night.
"Louis, I've thought this over from every angle, " I said. "It will be harder to start a real war with mortals than you think- "
"-And you're bound and determined to start it, aren't you? You want everyone, mortal or immortal, to come after you. "
"Why not? " I asked. "Let it begin. And let them try to destroy us the way they have destroyed their other devils. Let them try to wipe us out. " He was watching me with that old. expression of awe and incredulity that I had seen a thousand times on his face. I was a fool for it, as the expression goes. But the sky was paling overhead, the stars drifting steadily away. Only precious moments we had together before the early spring morning.
"And so you really mean for it to happen, " he said earnestly, his tone gentler than before.
"Louis, I mean for something and everything to happen, " I said. "I mean for all that we have been to change! What are we but leeches now-loathsome, secretive, without justification. The old romance is gone. So let us take on a new meaning. I crave the bright lights as I crave blood. I crave the divine visibility. I crave war. "
"The new evil, to use your old words, " he said. "And this time it is the twentieth-century evil. "
"Precisely, " I said. But again, I thought of the purely mortal impulse, the vain impulse, for worldly fame, acknowledgment. Faint blush of shame. It was al
l going to be such a pleasure.
"But why, Lestat? " he asked a little suspiciously. "Why the danger, the risk? After all, you have done it. You have come back. You're stronger than ever. You have the old fire as if it had never been lost, and you know how precious this is, this will simply to go on. Why risk it immediately? Have you forgotten what it was like when we had the world all around us, and no one could hurt us except ourselves? "
"Is this an offer, Louis? Have you come back to me, as lovers say? " His eyes darkened and he looked away from me.
"I'm not mocking you, Louis, " I said.
"You've come back to me, Lestat, " he said evenly, looking at me again. "When I heard the first whispers of you at Dracula's Daughter, I felt something that I thought was gone forever- " He paused. But I knew what he was talking about. He had already said it. And I had understood it centuries ago when I felt Armand's despair after the death of the old coven. Excitement, the desire to continue, these things were priceless to us. All the more reason for the rock concert, the continuation, the war itself.
"Lestat, don't go on the stage tomorrow night, " he said. "Let the films and the book do what you want. But protect yourself. Let us come together and let us talk together. Let us have each other in this century the way we never did in the past. And I do mean all of us. "
"Very tempting, beautiful one, " I said. "There were times in the last century when I would have given almost anything to hear those words. And we will come together, and we will talk, all of us, and we will have each other. It will be splendid, better than it ever was before. But I am going on the stage. I am going to be Lelio again the way I never was in Paris. I will be the Vampire Lestat for all to see. A symbol, an outcast, a freak of nature-something loved, something despised, all of those things. I tell you I can't give it up. I can't miss it. And quite frankly I am not the least afraid. " I braced myself for a coldness or a sadness to come over him. And I hated the approaching sun as much as I ever had in the past. He turned his back to it. The illumination was hurting him a little. But his face was as full of warm expression as before.
"Very well, then, " he said. "I would like to go into San Francisco with you. I would like that very much. Will you take me with you? " I couldn't immediately answer. Again, the sheer excitement was excruciating, and the love I felt for him was positively humiliating.
"Of course I'll take you with me, " I said. We looked at each other for a tense moment. He had to leave now. The morning had come for him.
"One thing, Louis, " I said.
"Yes? "
"Those clothes. Impossible. I mean, tomorrow night, as they say in the twentieth century, you will lose that sweater and those pants. "
The morning was too empty after he had gone. I stood still for a while thinking of that message, Danger. I scanned the distant mountains, the never ending fields. Threat, warning- what did it matter? The young ones dial the telephones. The old ones raise their supernatural voices. Was it so strange? I could only think of Louis now, that he was with me. And of what it would be like when the others came.
The vast sprawling parking lots of the San Francisco Cow Palace were overflowing with frenzied mortals as our motorcade pushed through the gates, my musicians in the limousine ahead, Louis in the leatherlined Porsche beside me. Crisp and shining in the black-caped costume of the band, he looked as if he'd stepped out of the pages of his own story, his green eyes passing a little fearfully over the screaming youngsters and motorcycle guards who kept them back and away from us. The hall had been sold out for a month; the disappointed fans wanted the music broadcast outside so they could hear it. Beer cans littered the ground. Teenagers sat atop car roofs and on trunks and hoods, radios blaring The Vampire Lestat at appalling volume. Alongside my window, our manager ran on foot explaining that we would have the outside video screens and speakers. The San Francisco police had given the go-ahead to prevent a riot. I could feel Louis's mounting anxiety. A pack of youngsters broke through the police lines and pressed themselves against his window as the motorcade made its sharp turn and plowed on towards the long ugly tube-shaped hall. I was positively enthralled with what was happening. And the recklessness in me was cresting. Again and again the fans surrounded the car before they were swept back, and I was beginning to understand how woefully I had underestimated this entire experience. The filmed rock shows I'd watched hadn't prepared me for the crude electricity that was already coursing through me, the way the music was already surging in my head, the way the shame for my mortal vanity was evaporating. It was mayhem getting into the hall. Through a crush of guards, we ran into the heavily secured backstage area, Tough Cookie holding tight to me, Alex pushing Larry ahead of him. The fans tore at our hair, our capes. I reached back and gathered Louis under my wing and brought him through the doors with us. And then in the curtained dressing rooms I heard it for the first time, the bestial sound of the crowd-fifteen thousand souls chanting and screaming under one roof. No, I did not have this under control, this fierce glee that made my entire body shudder. When had this ever happened to me before, this near hilarity? I pushed up to the front and looked through the peephole into the auditorium. Mortals on both sides of the long oval, up to the very rafters. And in the vast open center, a mob of thousands dancing, caressing, pumping fists into the smoky haze, vying to get close to the stage platform. Hashish, beer, human blood smell swirled on the ventilation currents. The engineers were shouting that we were set. Face paint had been retouched, black velvet capes brushed, black ties straightened. No good to keep this crowd waiting a moment longer. The word was given to kill the houselights. And a great inhuman cry swelled in the darkness, rolling up the walls. I could feel it in the floor beneath me.
It grew stronger as a grinding electronic buzz announced the connection of "the equipment. " The vibration went through my temples. A layer of skin was being peeled off. I clasped Louis's arm, gave him a lingering kiss, and then felt him release me. Everywhere beyond the curtain people snapped on their little chemical cigarette lighters, until thousands and thousands of tiny flames trembled in the gloom. Rhythmic clapping erupted, died out, the general roar rolling up and down, pierced by random shrieks. My head was teeming. And yet I thought of Renaud's so long ago. I positively saw it. But this place was like the Roman Colosseum! And making the tapes, the films-it had been so controlled, so cold. It had given no taste of this. The engineer gave the signal, and we shot through the curtain, the mortals fumbling because they couldn't see, as I maneuvered effortlessly over the cables and wires. I was at the lip of the stage right over the heads of the swaying, shouting crowd. Alex was at the drums. Tough Cookie had her flat shimmering electric guitar in hand, Larry was at the huge circular keyboard of the synthesizer. I turned around and glanced up at the giant video screens which would magnify our images for the scrutiny of every pair of eyes in the house. Then back at the sea of screaming youngsters. Waves and waves of noise inundated us from the darkness. I could smell the heat and the blood. Then the immense bank of overhead lights went on. Violent beams of silver, blue, red crisscrossed as they caught us, and the screaming reached an unbelievable pitch. The entire hall was on its feet. I could feel the light crawling on my white skin, exploding in my yellow hair. I glanced around to see my mortals glorified and frenzied already as they perched amid the endless wires and silver scaffolding. The sweat broke out on my forehead as I saw the fists raised everywhere in salute. And scattered all through the hall were youngsters in their Halloween vampire clothes, faces gleaming with artificial blood, some wearing floppy yellow wigs, some with black rings about their eyes to make them all the more innocent and ghastly. Catcalls and hoots and raucous cries rose above the general din. No, this was not like making the little films. This was nothing like singing in the air-cooled cork- lined chambers of the studio. This was a human experience made vampiric, as the music itself was vampiric, as the images of the video film were the images of the blood swoon. I was shuddering with pure exhilaration and the red-tinged sweat was p
ouring down my face. The spotlights swept the audience, leaving us bathed in a mercuric twilight, and everywhere the light hit, the crowd went into convulsions, redoubling their cries. What was it about this sound? It signaled man turned into mob-the crowds surrounding the guillotine, the ancient Romans screaming for Christian blood. And the Keltoi gathered in the grove awaiting Marius, the god. I could see the grove as I had when Marius told the tale; had the torches been any more lurid than these colored beams? Had the horrific wicker giants been larger than these steel ladders that held the banks of speakers and incandescent spotlights on either side of us? But there was no violence here; there was no death-only this childish exuberance pouring forth from young mouths and young bodies, an energy focused and contained as naturally as it was cut loose. Another wave of hashish from the front ranks. Long-haired leather-clad bikers with spoked leather bracelets clapping their hands above their heads-ghosts of the Keltoi, they seemed, barbarian locks streaming. And from all corners of this long hollow smoky place an uninhibited wash of something that felt like love. The lights were flashing on and off so that the movement of the crowd seemed fragmented, to be happening in fits and jerks. They were chanting in unison, now the volume swelling, what was it, LESTAT, LESTAT, LESTAT. Oh, this is too divine. What mortal could withstand this indulgence, this worship? I clasped the ends of my black cloak, which was the signal. I shook out my hair to its fullest. And these gestures sent a current of renewed screaming to the very back of the hall. The lights converged on the stage. I raised my cloak on either side like bat wings. The screams fused into a great monolithic roar.
"I AM THE VAMPIRE LESTAT! " I shouted at the top of my lungs as I stepped way back from the microphone, and the sound was almost visible as it arched over the length of the oval theater, and the voice of the crowd rose even higher, louder, as if to devour the ringing sound.
"COME ON, LET ME HEAR YOU! YOU LOVE ME! " I shouted suddenly, without deciding to do it. Everywhere people were stomping. They were stomping not only on the concrete floors but on the wooden seats.
