Chapter Eleven
“Do you want to say goodbye to your friends before we leave?” I ask him after we leave his family.
He hesitates and gives me a long look, scanning me briefly, in that magnetic way I’ve come to appreciate. The soft and amused laugh that escapes his lips makes my skin tingle everywhere. “No, I’m good. They’ll understand.”
Lupe was telling the truth. He does like me. A little? A lot? The warmth of his skin as he takes my hand lights a tiny flame in my chest, and the heat it creates spreads like a wildfire through my body. He leads me through the crowd all the way down to Central Avenue, as we hear the first few fireworks being set off.
We find a spot in the crowd standing in the section of the boulevard that’s closed off. Esteban stands next to me, with a hand placed on the small of my back.
The fireworks keep rising in the sky, slowly at first, followed by louder and faster displays. People around us cheer, and the brilliance of the artificial stardust paints the blue of the night, the popping sound echoing in my ears and my chest. My heart has been galloping ever since Esteban and I left the square. My stomach twists as I notice his eyes dance between me and the display of colors in the sky.
The blooming hope in my chest wants me to believe these fireworks are just as auspicious as New Year’s Eve displays. Part of me knows I should be careful, but I can’t remember the last time I’ve felt this electrified by being near someone I liked.
We exchange a few looks and smiles, but we’re both quiet while everyone around us seems determined to be as loud as they can be.
The final part of the show is an eruption of colors and sparks and it’s such a well-timed crescendo that my jaw drops, and I cover my mouth with my hand, almost giggling in ecstasy. I’m sad when it’s over, because once again, I hate the idea of saying goodbye to Esteban.
It’s a weekday, and everyone is in a hurry to go back home after celebrating the last couple days.
I’m thankful that the apartment is only a few blocks away. Even though they’re rather comfy, my red suede sandals are hurting my pinky toes.
“I’ll walk you home.” Esteban’s deep and confident voice penetrates all of my senses.
Nodding, I wrap my arm around his, and he rewards me with the most charming, satisfied grin I’ve ever seen.
We talk a bit about my family, his family, and we compare past Fourth of July experiences. When we reach the Old Town square on the way to my apartment, most of the people have gone and the band has stopped playing.
Stopping in my tracks, I take in the view I’m more familiar with, the one of the sleepy, quiet square.
“What is it?” Esteban asks, as a knot forms in my throat. I breathe deeply to dissolve it and blink away the tears that have formed in my eyes.
“It’s just strange.” I smile. “It’s strange the way you get attached to a place so quickly. One day you look at it as a tourist, as an outsider, and suddenly it becomes part of who you are.” Esteban listens intently. “Want to know something funny?”
He nods. “Of course.” His green eyes are darker than usual, but they sparkle just as bright as the fireworks we were watching a few minutes ago.
“Did I tell you which town my parents were from?”
He shakes his head, his full lips pressing in a line.
“They were from a town close to Granada, the original Santa Fe.”
“No way.”
I laugh. “No, it’s true. It’s a small rural town. Honestly, I don’t know much about it. Except, now that I’m here, I keep asking myself if I was destined to end up in New Mexico one way or another. I also keep wondering if maybe I should move to Santa Fe. Have some sort of full-circle moment,” I say, taking another look toward the square and staring at the light illuminating the church of San Felipe de Neri.
“Please don’t,” he says, distracting me from my monologue.
“Don’t what?” Confused by his words, I smile.
He exhales, his bottom teeth grazing his full upper lip, as if he needs to muster up the courage to say whatever he needs to tell me.
“Don’t move to Santa Fe.”
I stare at him partly confused, partly amused, hoping that his reason is the one I want to hear. “Why? You don’t think it’s the right place for me?”
“No, it’s not that. I’m sure you’d do well anywhere…” His tone has softened, and his words make me smile. “And sure, Santa Fe is beautiful and fascinating, but long-term might have less opportunities for you.”
“Less opportunities for me? I don’t understand what you mean by that. You know I work remotely.” I can’t hold back my smile, even though I try to do that by biting on my bottom lip.
“Fine,” he exhales. “I would rather you not move to Santa Fe.”
“Why is that?” I press, stifling a laugh.
“Because I like you and I’d like to get to know you, Ines,” he says in a lower tone. It’s too dark to tell out here in the square, but I’d bet he’s blushing. His mouth is lightly ajar, his pupils are wide, eyes fixed on me like I’ve just about hypnotized him. I let out a loud, joyous, and amused laugh, because this is too good. The look of embarrassment on his face is one of the most endearing things I’ve ever seen. If I weren’t trying to exert some type of restraint on myself, I’d kiss him stupid right this second.
“You do realize you sound like a character from a Jane Austen novel, don’t you?” I tease.
“Is that a bad thing?” he asks, shyly.
“Nope, it’s not in my book,” I answer. His lips are pressed into a thin line and he scratches the back of his head.
“Stop, you’ll mess up your stylish do,” I tease him, reaching for his hair and brushing my fingers against his. He takes my hand in his and pulls me closer to him, and it’s so unexpected that I have to steady myself, placing my other hand on his hard, solid chest.
We haven’t been this close since we were dancing earlier, but now there’s hardly anyone around us, and the more I try to tell myself I shouldn’t, the more I’m dying to kiss him. He takes me in his arm and doesn’t let go.
“Did you hear what I said?” He scans my face impatiently.
Nodding, I reply, “I like you too, Esteban.” The words come out of my mouth fast and jumbled, and I feel like a schoolgirl confessing her feelings to her crush, but in all fairness, he started it.
“I mean it, Ines. I don’t know if it’s too soon for you, but I would like to get to know you better,” he whispers.
Yes, please.
How about right now? I almost want to say, but I’m afraid to scare him by being too forward and I also don’t want to betray the promise I made Lupe. I’m not going to play with Esteban’s heart. In order to keep my promise, we need to take things slow. This alone poses a challenge. Right now, I want nothing more than to throw caution to the wind, I want nothing more than to forget about everything and get lost in him.
“I’ve got good news for you.” I smile, a little smugly. His responding smile is nothing short of glowing. Whispering, I say, “I think I’m going to stay put and remain in Albuquerque.” Adding a saucy wink and leaning closer.
“Good.” He brings the hand he’s still holding to his mouth and kisses it.
“I want to get to know you too, Esteban. But I also promised your sister I wouldn’t treat you as a rebound, and I think we need to take it slow…despite not really wanting to.”
His eyes widen in surprise, and then a laugh escapes from his lips.
“Of course. Leave it to Lupe to somehow meddle in our business.” Esteban shakes his head, but I can tell he’s elated. Sheer euphoria overtakes my body, electrifying every muscle with new energy.
“Our business?” I tease.
He nods silently, his gaze as bright as the stars out in the desert.
“I like the sound of that,” I admit, my voice trembling with excitement and impatience.
I want to be closer to him. I need to be closer to him. He’s right to laugh. Taking it slow
is not going to work. He looks down at me with a serious expression, long eyelashes framing his pretty eyes, but he can’t hide the mischief in them.
“Why would you ever make her such a promise, Ines?”
I shrug. “I had to. Do you think she would have ever left us alone, otherwise?”
“So, is it presumptuous to think you’ve been thinking about me, even though we haven’t seen each other? As you might have guessed, my sister bullied me into staying away from you for the time being. I didn’t want to.” And there it is. There’s the confirmation that I’m not alone nursing a huge crush, which is a pleasant surprise.
Esteban Garcia has been thinking of me.
His words leave me flustered, and my knees go weak, but I have to pull myself together. When he gives my hand a tug, I turn slightly to resume walking, but instead, he pulls me toward him and leans down and holds my chin, tilting it up gently toward him. He pauses for a second, looking down at me through the slits of his barely open eyes, as if looking for confirmation. I close my eyes, inebriated by the feeling of excitement running through my veins. I tilt my head back and pucker up slightly. A moment later he presses his soft, full lips against mine.
We stay like this for a couple of seconds, before my lips part, welcoming his tongue, ready to surrender. Esteban’s kiss is so much more than I expected. It’s hello and goodbye at the same time. It’s discovery, excitement, and longing all at once. As his tongue wraps around mine, he kisses me deeper, taking my breath away. I know I’m in heaps of trouble.
I hoped he would be a decent kisser. I didn’t expect him to be a great one. The more his tongue wraps around mine, tasting and sucking, makes me believe this man can put a spell on me with his tongue. This is the kind of intoxicating kiss that seeps into your memory and every cell of your being. This is the kind of kiss I will hopefully still remember when I’m wrinkly and old. I’m swept away by his mouth moving with mine, and I’m so desperate for more. His hands come up, one cupping my jaw, the other at the nape of my neck. He breaks the kiss and looks at me for a second before he starts placing gentle kisses all over my mouth, worshipping my lips. His fingers sift through the hair on my neck, tugging on it gently. I lift myself on my tiptoes even though I’m wearing heels because the need to be closer to him is stronger than anything else. I run my fingers through his hair, messing it up just as he was a moment ago. His hands travel to my waist, pressing me closer to him. His tongue parts my lips again and it circles and explores my mouth until I’m nearly breathless, but I don’t want him to stop. He does, and I mourn the loss of him immediately.
He presses his forehead against mine, catching his breath. I look up through my lashes.
“I don’t know how we’ll ever take this slow,” I pant. The low rumble erupting from his chest is the most delightful sound.
“You can say that again,” he mumbles and then kisses my forehead. Taking a step back, he offers me his arm and smiles at me. “Come on. Let’s get you home.”
Chapter Twelve
A few days after our Fourth of July encounter, Lupe and I are back to being the best of buddies. So much so that she’s been on a mission to help me get more work.
Maybe that’s her way to make amends. I let her run with it. I do feel a little bad about keeping my kiss with Esteban a secret, but I don’t want her mad at me again after I’d promised her we wouldn’t rush things. If I think about Esteban’s kiss the other night, I’m surprised we were able to stop at all. He kissed me again when we got to my apartment. Twice. Actually, three times, and each time was better than the last. With my back pressed against the wall in the courtyard and his body flush with mine, I could have kissed him for another two hours. Feeling him hard against me was no help, either. I was moments away from pulling him by his shirt upstairs.
Determined to act like a gentleman, he regretfully left after kissing me on the bridge of my nose. Letting go of him was nothing short of torture.
Needless to say, I’ve replayed his kisses on a loop in my head. I’ve been in an Esteban-daze for days, but I know that around his sister I need to snap out of my daydream…if I don’t want to risk compromising things.
On the business front, Lupe convinced me to get business cards to display on the counter in her store, advertising my services. She also persuaded me to hit up a few more establishments around Old Town to let them know I’m available for website design, graphics, logos, or general re-branding.
She talked about redoing the logo for their restaurants, and I stop her before she calls Esteban, telling her there was nothing wrong with the current logo.
I lied. The logo for El Chile Verde is a bit outdated, in that classic, old-fashioned way, but from what I witnessed personally and the reviews I read online the chain doesn’t need any help with advertising or rebranding.
I didn’t want Lupe to call Esteban, even though I haven’t seen him since the Fourth of July.
I’m afraid I won’t be able to control myself if he comes around, and we agreed to keep things low-key. At least for the time being.
We exchanged numbers and have texted on and off. He wanted to make plans but warned me he has a couple of busy weeks and might not follow through. I had to wonder if this was his way of taking things slow. He gave me a taste of his lips, and now he was letting me simmer. I felt like a pot full of hot, spicy green chili stew. If this was his way to get me worked up, it was working. I knew if I saw him again right away we would have moved entirely too fast. But even so, there’s no way to tell how long I’ll be able to hold back when I finally see him again.
It’s puzzling the magnetic force with which I’m attracted to the beautiful, mysterious local. Every day that goes by, I grow more and more restless with thoughts of him. I’ve been thinking only and exclusively about Esteban when I should have been more preoccupied with the dissolution of my marriage. What am I doing?
I wanted to stay here to get some distance from everything, not look for trouble, or even worse, an affair. As much as I try, it seems I can’t control my thoughts or my dreams because all I’m able to do is fantasize about when I’ll see him again. I can’t shake the memory of his mouth on mine, and I swear the memory is so vivid, I can almost taste it in my dreams.
The dreams are varied, and they range from romantic to filthy. I sometimes dream of him telling me we’re destined for each other. In the dream, it’s usually the two of us against the gorgeous backdrop of a purple and blue Albuquerque sunset, his hands cradling my cheeks and my hair blowing like I have wind machines at my disposal a-la Beyoncé. The filthy dreams are, well…filthy. Most of the filthy versions are of the two of us, naked in my bed, in a variety of positions. Or on the armchair. Or on the desk. Or on the counter in Lupe’s store.
Esteban’s kisses have done a number on me. I’ve woken up several times with my body quivering, nipples hard. Flashes of my dirty, dirty dreams about Esteban appear before my eyes. I dream of his mouth on mine, his eyes roaming my skin like a hungry animal, his hands exploring my body. I dream of the most glorious of orgasms and I’m pretty sure I wake up one morning mumbling his name like I’ve just come…in my dream. The proof is all over my underwear. It’s a good thing I haven’t seen him around, because with the amount of x-rated dreams I’ve had, I might pounce on him the next time we meet.
Like I said, I’m restless. Restless to see him, even though there’s a part of me that tells me I shouldn’t even think of him.
I’ve never been this boy crazy in my life, and it makes no sense.
He did apologize for being too busy and not being able to make solid plans. On the other hand, that sounds like an excuse, and I honestly don’t know what to think. Maybe I should have asked Lupe to call him about rebranding the logo for the restaurants after all, just to see if he’d come around then, but I killed that chance.
For some reason, if I have to see him, I want to run into him on my terms. What if he regrets kissing me? What if he realized he shouldn’t be shacking up with a married woman?
As days go by and my restlessness becomes unbearable, I resort to stupid, juvenile tactics, and decide to casually drop by his workplace. I ride my bicycle by the restaurant where I first met him, and they tell me he hasn’t been around at all, which sounds weird, since he’s been so busy with work. I glance at the table where I sat that night, and it’s like a million years have passed. The events of that night still hurt, but part of me has made peace with it. I’m not the same person anymore, and I’m working toward a happier version of me.
But back to Esteban. Where is he? I don’t want to ask Lupe now that we’re getting along again. If I start talking about him, I’m afraid I’ll let it slip that we kissed, and I don’t know how she’ll react to that. She’s a little more trusting toward me after our argument, but I sense that she still expects me to pack up my stuff and move back to California at a moment’s notice.
In the end, I suck it up and ask Lupe, “How’s Esteban? I haven’t seen him since the fireworks on Fourth of July!” I try to sound casual and nonchalant.
“Really? You haven’t seen him at all? I know he’s been busy with work. He has a lot going on right now.” She shrugs, arching one eyebrow.
As the days go by, and Esteban’s texts become fewer and farther between, I panic. I’m an idiot. What if he has someone else? What if he rekindled things with that ex-girlfriend Lupe was talking about?
“You said Esteban had gotten out of a relationship recently. Are you sure he doesn’t have a girlfriend?” I flat-out ask Lupe at the next chance I get, unable to phrase it any other way.
“You sure are curious about him, aren’t you?”
“What’s so strange about me asking questions about him?” I shrug. “He’s the only person I know here, other than you and your family. And he’s been so nice to me. You should have seen him when he ran off the asshat that’s soon to be my future ex-husband.”
Enchanted By You Page 9
