by Sadie Jacks
His smile was sad. “That’s what I was afraid of, mate.” He lifted a gun. Shot me dead in the chest. “But hopefully ye’ll still like me when ye wake up.”
The silver nitrate bullet sank into my body. The liquid silver spilling into my flesh. “Tavis, you arsehole.”
“Like I said.” He walked over, stood over me with a sad smile on his face. “I’ll be here waiting for both of ye to wake up.”
The poison was fire in my veins. I would have been okay with it. Been okay with what he did. Except the silver chased away the taste of her.
In the end, he took her from me anyway. And that, I couldn’t forgive.
Chapter 11 – Vari
I woke up with a jolt and a terrible headache. As if the castle masons were working on a new wing in my brain. The constant thump, thump, thump of pain against my eyes made my belly swish and wiggle.
“Good, ye’re awake.”
I looked over to see Tavis. I hadn’t expected to see him through a cage, though. “Tavis, what did you do?” I rolled over. Screamed as I fell before I crashed into the floor. The pounding in my head ratcheted up a notch. Even my groan made my head hurt.
“I had to put ye in iron, Vari. Don’t worry. Koehn’s in silver.” He pointed to the other side of the room.
“Koehn!” I jerked forward, felt the hiss of iron as piercing agony shot through my arm. I yanked away. Rubbed at the rising blister. “Tavis, what the feck?”
He shook his head. “I’ve got food for ye. I’ve also got someone coming over. So mind yer manners. If ye insult her, I’ll be very angry.” His face closed down.
I saw his resolve to kill me if necessary. I knew what my death looked like in the face of others. I’d witnessed it enough times to recognize the cold reality of it. Even if we barely knew each other, I saw my death written on his face. I nodded.
He gave one hard dip with his chin. “Sit tight, lass. I’ll get yer food.” He spun on his heel and walked away.
I looked around the room. It wasn’t quite as bad as the catacomb, but it was close enough to make the breath back up in my lungs. No moisture inched its way down the walls, but I could feel the cool humidity in the air. It smelled fresh and clean, but I knew that wouldn’t last if he kept us down here for very long. I was just thankful there weren’t any rats scurrying by.
I shuddered. I hated rats. Loathed them—refused to eat them even when I was starving. They were that bad.
Tavis’s footsteps preceded him. He carried a huge platter. Even from my lower position on the floor, I could see the mountain of food he’d piled on it.
My belly growled. So did Beastie. We were so hungry. Famished. Licking my lips, I practically vibrated while I waited for him to lower it enough that I could reach through the cage bars and grab something to shove in my mouth.
“Don’t make yerself sick, please.” His voice was wry.
“I make no promises.” My eyes widened when he finally lowered the dish. There had to be an entire feast on that one large plate. Stacked about eight inches high with every possible meat and vegetable I’d ever seen.
He stepped back as I fell on the food like the dog my father typically called me. Too hungry to worry about manners, I grabbed up food by the handful and shoved it in my mouth. Barely chewing, I swallowed it down and inhaled the next bite.
“Easy there, Feathers, ye’re going to hurt yerself.” He squatted down. A pitcher of water appeared out of nowhere.
I didn’t bother to stop and tell him I would be fine. He’d find out soon enough for himself. Reaching out, I grabbed up the pitcher, took a swallow.
“I’ve got some chocolate for ye, so make sure ye save some room, eh?” he sank the rest of the way to the floor and settled himself back against the far wall.
He’d gotten me chocolate? All for me? Tears backed up in my throat as I tried to wash down the food. The lump in my throat threatened to make me lose the precious meal. But I shoved it down. All of it. When I could speak again, I nodded at him. “Thank you, Tavis.” I tried to eat with more decorum. Instead of shoving steaks into my mouth whole, I took bites of them. That was about as good as I was going to get.
He smiled at me. “I’ve not seen a lass eat so much and be so little.”
I shrugged. Figured he didn’t really want to know how long it had been since I’d had a true meal.
We passed the next while in silence—except for the occasional groans of nirvana that escaped from me. I gulped down the rest of the water. Smacked my lips together. Fell back against the bed and let my body try to deal with the massive amount of food I’d just shoved down my gullet.
With my ‘enhancements,’ I knew I wouldn’t have to wait too long. Then I’d be ready for another banquet feast.
The small food baby that was bulging my stomach brought a smile to my face. I’d never get to have my own children—father had taken care of that long ago. But it was nice to see at least some meat on my bones. I snickered mentally.
Oh, gods, that was bad. Even for you.
“Oh shut up, you thought it was funny.”
“What did I think was funny?” Tavis asked. “And I didn’t say anything, so why tell me to shut up?”
I looked up, embarrassment hot in my cheeks. “Sorry. I wasn’t talking to you.”
Tavis looked around the room. When he looked back at me, a new knowledge had settled in his eyes. “But ye were talking to someone, yes?”
I nodded.
“Ye never answered Koehn’s question earlier. Do you have multiple personalities inside ye?” he asked softly.
“When is Koehn going to wake up?” I looked over at the vampire. “Did you hurt him?”
“Not too terribly bad. I had to shoot him with AgNo. But I got him the chelating treatment, so he’s recovering pretty well. I’m almost surprised he’s not awake yet.”
I nodded. “That’s good then.” I sat in silence while I waited for Koehn to rise from his recovery state.
“After Koehn gave ye a bit of his blood, the sun didn’t kill him. Can ye explain that?” Tavis asked softly after a while.
I shook my head. “No. But I’m glad he’s not dead.” I turned to Tavis. “After I took his blood, nothing has been the same inside me. Can you explain that?”
Tavis mirrored my movement. “No. Neither of us can. That’s why we need answers. Why my friend is coming.”
“Who is your friend?” I got up onto the bed, sat on it cross legged. We definitely didn’t have beds in the catacombs. This was a luxury.
“She’s a...seer. Will be able to help us see inside ye if ye don’t know some answers.”
The food baby in my belly turned sour. “Why would I work with her? I don’t want her peering in my head. In my soul.”
“Because no one has answers and we do have lives to live. Ye set them off their courses when ye came through the portals.” He looked at me steadily. “No one will share what she tells us. But we need the answers.” He opened his mouth as if he were going to ask me something else, but then shook his head and closed his mouth.
I looked over at Koehn. “Does he have a family? A wife?”
“Not anymore. She died a long time ago, but I know he still loves her.”
I nodded. More than anything, I wanted a love like that. Someone to call my very own. Someone to claim me, just as I claimed him.
Chewing on my lip, I was tempted to use some of my magic to see if Koehn was truly okay. But I didn’t. Tavis was right. We had no idea what was going on, and I needed to not make things more difficult for all of us until we had some real answers.
“Would ye like yer chocolate?” Tavis asked.
I whipped my head in his direction, my eyes wide. “Yes.” I got up from my bed and walked to the iron bars that stood between us.
He got up, handed it through. “I got ye a Hershey’s. I didn’t know if ye had a preference or not.”
I snatched my hand back, the precious chocolate my prize. Without ceremony, I ripped the wrapper off. Chocolate.
Human chocolate. Humans were weird beings, but they had the best sweets. I’d only ever had it once, but it had been emblazoned on my memory.
I broke off one of the little rectangles, settled it on my tongue. A moan trilled through me as the sweet taste broke over my senses. It was sweet. Creamy. Thick and rich. Moving my tongue over the roof of my mouth, decorated the inside of my mouth with the delicious treat. Then wallowed in the slowly fading flavor.
“Uh, lass. Maybe a little less on the vocals, yeah?” Tavis said.
I lifted my heavy lids, looked at him.
He was leaning against the wall, one leg bent. Hands shoved in his pockets, his brow was furrowed as he looked everywhere but at me.
“Sorry.” I swallowed the last traces of the chocolate piece. “It’s so good. Thank you.”
He nodded, but didn’t look at me. In the low light, I thought I detected a slide of pink across his cheekbones. He shifted slightly before settling back down.
I broke off the next rectangle and raised it to my nose. There was no scent like chocolate. Had it been possible, I would have made a bed of it and slept every night in its embrace.
Sliding the little brick of sweetness into my mouth, I tried to keep a lid on my moaning and groaning. From the shuffling and aggrieved sighs from Tavis, I wasn’t successful. But what else was I supposed to do? It was mind-blowing. Better than sex.
“Vari.” Koehn’s voice was weak.
I swallowed the remainder of the tiny block of chocolate. “I’m here. Are you okay?” Carefully wrapping the rest of the chocolate back in its wrapper, I laid it down on the bed next to me.
Koehn didn’t say anything else.
I looked at Tavis. “What happened to him?”
The bigger man shook his head, straightened. “I don’t know. I’ll check on him.”
I nodded and got up on my knees so I could see Koehn more easily. The height of the iron cage was about a foot too short. I could see his body, but I couldn’t discern his features very clearly.
Biting back the snarl of outrage, I bit my lip. “Well?”
Tavis looked over at me. “He’s fine. Just sleeping, it looks like.”
My brow furrowed. “He’s sleeping?”
Tavis walked back over. “Appears that way. Yer moaning probably soaked through to his…mind.” He had a wide smile on his face.
A smile lit my heart for a brief moment.
Wait. What the hell was going on with me?
“What’s got ye glowering?” Tavis asked.
“I’m not happy.” I looked up at him. Clearly he should be able to tell that.
Tavis shifted his gaze back and forth. “Okay. I’m sorry?”
A snort drifted out of my mouth. “I meant in general. I’m not a happy person. In fact, happy people tend to piss me off. Like I want to rip their heads off and drink their spinal fluid.” I glared in Koehn’s direction. “I’ve smiled more in the last day than I have in my entire life. And it’s his fault.”
Tavis stepped forward. “Ye’re a Grumpy Gus, too?”
My brow furrowed. “No. I’m usually pissy. Who’s Gus?”
Tavis jabbed a thumb in Koehn’s direction. “He’s usually grumpy all the time. He’s been nicer today than in all my time of knowing him. And I’m sure it’s yer fault, lass. Or at least when ye two touched or something. Set off some kind of magic that no one can figure out.”
I glared at Tavis. “You’re saying he was bitter and angry like me, but since touching me he’s become a ray of bloody sunshine?”
Tavis snickered, nodded. “Aye.”
“What the feck, Tavis?!”
His laugh was huge and moved his entire body. “That’s what we need to figure out. Can I ask ye some questions?”
I settled back down on the bed. Crossed my arms. “Yes.” This was a load of supernatural shite, that’s what it is. None of this made any sense, and it was pissing me off.
Finally. The coos and smiles were starting to freak me out, Beastie said.
“Right? And now that I know it’s his fault, we can get to bottom o—”
Tavis was watching me intently.
I winced. “I’m talking out loud again, aren’t I?”
He nodded. “And it sounds like an interesting conversation. Who are ye talking to?”
“What questions did you want to ask me?”
Tavis lifted a blonde brow. “Who ye’re talking to, lass. That’s what I want to know.”
I shook my head. “Next question.”
“Why did ye come through the portals?”
“I couldn’t stay in Faery anymore.” Ha, that was an understatement.
“Why not?”
“Because reasons.”
His lips firmed. “What reasons?”
I growled low in my throat. “Reasons reasons. Next question.”
“What color was the portal when ye came through it?”
I studied Tavis, certain the poor man had lost some sense along the way somewhere. “Did I hit you?”
He blinked. Stared at me for a moment. “Excuse me?”
“Did I hit you at some point? Is that why you’re asking me about the portal colors?”
Confusion dug furrows into his eyebrows. “Well, yes, ye did hit me. But that’s nothing to do with my question.” He licked his lips, leaned forward. “My family is part of the portal keepers.”
Ooooh. I nodded. That made a lot more sense. “You’re one of those MacDougals.” I nodded again.
He smiled. “Aye. So what color was it?”
“Verdant green to sky blue, just like usual.”
His face lost all color. “What did ye say, lass?” He shoved his pinkie finger in his ear, shook it.
I repeated my words. “That’s what colors they always are for me. I’ve been out more than a couple times.” Okay, fine, I could literally count on one hand how many times I’d found an open portal, but he didn’t need to know that.
He stood up quickly, backed away. Waving his hand in a complicated set of motions, I heard him utter “open” in the Old Language. He moved his hands about a foot apart. In the middle of the wall in Koehn’s home, Tavis opened a portal to Faery.
And it was nothing I’d ever seen before. “B-b-but…” I shook my head as I peered through the small portal. Shining like the sun on a clear summer day, it was yellow. It soothed something inside me.
Until the wrongness of what I was seeing finally sank into my brain. Horror washed through me. My toes went numb as my stomach revolted. This couldn’t…this couldn’t be happening. I shook my head.
Tavis nodded. “Ye didn’t come from Faery, Vari.”
My brain ground to a halt. Emotions rushed through me, too fast to track. Thoughts swirled and shattered as I tried to figure out what...
He slapped his hands closed. This time when he moved his hands, it was a different pattern. But when he said “open,” and threw his hands wide, I saw my version of normal.
Dark and desolate, everything was rundown and in disrepair. Thunder boomed and lightning cracked off in the distance through the doorway to the other realm.
Tavis walked towards me, his hands still outstretched. As he neared my cage, the portal changed into a pretty sky blue that I’d always associated with freedom.
I cowered away. Hating the truth that stared me in the face. “Stop.” I held up my hands in surrender. My flesh sizzled as I backed into the iron bars that made the back of my cage.
Vari, steady. Steady. You’re safe. We’re safe, Beastie said inside me.
I shook my head. We would never be safe. Never. My vision started to bend at the edges as my body flashed white hot, then burned with ice cold. The staccato thump, thump, thump of my heartbeat in my ears were the drums of the coming enemy.
With a sharp clap of hands, the portal disappeared. Tavis stood on the other side of the bars, agony and wretched pity on his face. “Ye’re one of them, aren’t ye?”
My nails lengthened into claws as my body bent into angles that rip
ped my muscles from my bones with hard snaps.
“No!” I tried to stop it. Tried to get it under control, but they slipped out of my grasp. Out of Beastie’s grasp.
Tavis’s eyes widened as all the color drained from his face. “Vari?”
“Run, Tavis, RUN!”
I fell to the floor as the creatures I carried inside me all clambered to get out. In a coordinated effort, they rushed the steel barrier that I’d created. Knocked it down as if it were no more significant than a spider’s web.
“Help me, Danu. Help me.” My body was tossed up and smashed against the top of the cage, only to be forced down into the cement floor. A cloud of dust and loose stones plumed into the air around me. Bones broke and more muscles ripped. My mouth could no longer form words as my top lip was yanked up and over my skull.
With one hand, one of the creatures who shared my form reached inside my mouth and ripped out my tongue. Threw it to the floor like a dead animal. My other hand clawed through the fragile skin of my neck and crushed my vocal cords.
“By the saints,” Tavis whispered before he opened a new portal and ran through it.
I was alone. Again.
Don’t be so down, sister. We’re here with you.
Yesss, we are finally out.
You shouldn’t have locked us away, Variance. You shouldn’t have tried to—
“Vari!” Koehn shouted from the other cage.
The beings inside my body threw us onto the floor. He was still here. He was going to die. And it would be my fault.
No. It’sss father’s fault. He’sss the one we punisssssh.
I gritted my mental teeth, trying to get a grasp of all the pieces and parts of me. I tried to shove them back into the box. Into the deep dark pit inside me where they couldn’t hurt anyone.
Most especially these two men who had saved me.
The bloodsucker, one of the creatures sniffed the air. A low shiver ran over my abused and broken body. The bloodsucker has touched us.
No. No, he hasn’t. He’s done nothing wrong. He’s innocent. I pleaded with her. Knew if she got her hands on him, he would simply cease to exist.
