“Then I’m sure you’ll find no shortage of men willing to help you in that department.”
Linley took his free hand into hers. “I’m not concerned about other men. I would like you to be my lover.”
“Me?” Patrick was genuinely shocked.
“Yes, why not?”
He rolled the idea around in his brain for a minute, and then shook his head. “Being someone’s lover is a very complicated business.” When she started to argue, he cut her off. “But if you would like for this to be a trial run, we can go home when this is all over, and then discuss it the next time we see each other.”
“The next time we see each other? When am I ever in London?”
“When am I ever going to be in Malta? Or Egypt? Or South America?” Patrick asked her. “These are all things we would have to work out.”
He did have a point. How could they be lovers if they never saw each other? Linley thought it would be worth it just to see him once every six months or so, but she knew that was unfair to both of them.
“I don’t want to think about all that right now,” she said. “Can’t we just enjoy each other’s company while we have it?”
Patrick pulled her closer to him. It would have been a perfect time to tell her about Kyre House. About the money, and how he planned to spend it. Yes, that would have been the perfect time, but it just did not feel right. After all, that was not the kind of thing a man springs on a girl after taking her virginity. Her thoughts were probably all muddled and she would more than likely get emotional. So, to avoid making things any more difficult than they already were, Patrick tucked his little plan back into the corners of his mind. He would tell her later, and they could talk it over then.
Cradled in his arms, Linley had no idea of the struggle taking place in Patrick’s head. She assumed he was as calm and content as she was at that moment. If she had it her way, Patrick would never be more than an arm’s length away from her for the rest of his life. But she knew better to think that was possible.
She ran her hand over his hip and down his leg. He was warm, and sticky, and wonderful. And, for the night at least, he belonged to her.
“Aren’t you glad you quit resisting me and accepted the inevitable?” she asked.
“Inevitable or not, I never wanted to pressure you into doing something you would come to regret later.”
“Just because your first time was horrible doesn’t mean everyone else will have the same experience,” Linley said. She traced her finger along his jawline and smiled. “I think making love with you is absolutely wonderful.”
Linley already wanted him again. She wasn’t sure if that was normal, or even acceptable behavior, but as she nibbled the base of his throat, she felt Patrick’s blood rise, and knew he was more than willing for another round.
“If this is to be a trial run between us,” she said. “Then I intend to find out exactly what I can expect from my future lover. And no more of that timid lovemaking business. When I stayed with the Howards, I heard them in the room next to mine. How ever they were doing it, I thought they were going to knock the walls down. If you’re feeling up to it, I’d like to try something like that.”
Patrick kicked up one of his dark brows. This was turning out to be quite the adventure. And if it was a lover Linley really wanted, he hoped she could keep up with him, otherwise, she had her work cut out for her.
“Turn over,” he told her. “Hands and knees.”
Linley did as he asked, more than a little self-conscious to be so naked and so…visible…in front of him. When he was on top, covering her, that was one thing, but this was another matter entirely.
He slipped into her from behind. There was very little pain this time, and Linley actually felt a little jolt of pleasure hitch in her throat as Patrick plunged himself all the way in with one slow sweep of his hips.
And as he dragged himself out of her, then drove in again, Linley bowed her back and took every inch he offered. Patrick, more than encouraged by this, quickened his tempo and intensified his thrusts until the sheer force of them made Linley brace her palm against the cool wall.
It hurt. She wasn’t going to deny it. She also wasn’t going to deny how good it felt, pain and all. Patrick thrust so hard that her head nearly smacked the wall. This time, Linley put both hands against the wall and pushed back, causing him to slam into her with enough force to make her cry out.
Patrick pounded her almost as hard as he could. Linley’s bony backside dug into his hips, and he thought that if this beautiful young woman wanted sex without the expectation of marriage, he was the luckiest man alive.
Reaching around her hip, Patrick brought his hand down and began to stroke her. This time he wasn’t stopping until she found her own release. Thankfully, their earlier lovemaking session took care of any pent up urges on his part, and now Patrick was ready to go for quite some time.
The magic he worked with his hands and his body became almost too much for Linley to handle. He slammed into her as deep as she let him go. Again. And again. And again. All the while, he stroked her with his fingers hard and fast.
She uttered a filthy word.
Bit her lip until it nearly bled.
Arched her back and gnashed her teeth, and fought for something that came toward her like a freight train. Bearing down on her. Crashing into her with enough force to knock her backward. Linley’s entire body convulsed in wave after wave of pleasure until she collapsed from the sheer intensity of it all.
Patrick caught her before she fell, her body so weak he almost had to hold her up.
When Linley’s spasms subsided, and she returned to the world of the living, where things like time and gravity still existed, she became aware of the way Patrick stared at her. He knelt, suspended in half-thrust behind her, his mouth agape. Linley tossed her hair back out of her eyes, turned her head to meet his, and muttered the very first thing that came to her mind.
“Don’t stop.”
***
Linley was surprised at the lack of blood. It was her understanding women bled significantly after their first time, but except for one red smear on the inside of her thigh, there was none.
Alone in her own room, she examined her body. The water from the pump was very cold, but she hadn’t bothered to heat it. She liked the shock of the freezing water against her bare skin. She splashed some on her face, and between her legs, wincing. Her body felt sore, but as many times as they made love that night, she wasn’t surprised.
Linley felt drained from it all, but was absolutely, deliciously happy. This was the adventure she’d been waiting for! This was her one chance at really living, and she had every intention of making it count.
After all, she was no longer a virgin. She had given her innocence away, and could not take it back. Not that she wanted to—Linley had no regrets about the night before. She had only sweet memories and the prospect of many more ahead of her. But she did not make light of the situation. They took a very great risk. There would be consequences, no doubt. Linley only hoped they lay farther down the road.
Much farther.
***
In the courtyard below, Patrick sat in quiet meditation. For the very first time, his head was clear.
Nothing like an hour or two of sex to put everything back into perspective! He must have been very bad off, indeed. But that was not why he did it. Patrick knew it was more than mere desperation that led him to abandon his principles. To do the unthinkable.
Yet he thought about it plenty enough.
There had been no finagling. No seducing. Yes, he broke his own rule—to stay away from innocent young girls who always expected more than he could offer—but Patrick justified it by telling himself she practically forced him to do it. How many times had Linley begged him?
But that wasn’t entirely true. He wanted Linley just as badly as she wanted him. She was an amazing young woman. Not beautiful. Not even his type—if he actually had one—but there was something about he
r…
In truth, there were so many things about Linley Talbot-Martin that Patrick could not put a finger on just one of them. She was intelligent, but she was not cunning. She was witty, yet her jokes were never hurtful. She never did anything at anyone else’s expense. And she did not lie.
Most of all, she did not lie.
And while Patrick had to admit that Linley was no beauty, he found her irresistible. He loved her tangled hair, her gangly limbs, her flat bosom, her bony hips, and those ridiculous school-girl freckles spattered all over her face—and over a good deal more of her, if his memory served him right.
Patrick opened his eyes. It was a beautiful morning. The best morning he’d seen in years. Or, at least, the best one he actually bothered to pay attention to. He’d made plans earlier to hike up to the top of the mountain with Linley. The lama had told him that he should see it. The view, he said, was breathtaking. Sometimes all one needed was a different perspective.
CHAPTER FORTY-THREE
“Are you sure you feel up to it?” Patrick asked, staring at the winding path leading up the side of the mountain.
Linley fixed her eyes on it as well. “I am if you are.”
“Not too sore?”
She smiled, but did not blush. “Oh, I’m sore.”
Patrick held out his hand, and Linley took it. Together, they walked up the path. The morning mist clung to the mountain, shrouding the monastery. Trees grew fewer and far between the higher Patrick and Linley climbed. They could see the place where the waterfall dumped over the edge of one of the mountains. Someone had placed prayer wheels along the dirt path, and Linley gave them each a spin as she passed by.
Did she feel purified? Was she any closer to enlightenment?
No, Linley felt none of that. She only felt tired. So very tired.
“How much farther?” she asked.
Patrick looked up to see the tip of the mountain. “Are you bored of this already?”
She walked silently for a few steps, not knowing exactly what to say. Things were very different between them now. She felt a little nervous, a little shy. “Patrick, how are we supposed to act now? How should we behave toward each other?”
He squeezed her hand. “How do you want to act?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never been in this situation before.”
Of course she hadn’t. Patrick smiled to himself, relishing in the fact that, for now, she was his. No man ever touched her before, and for as long as he could help it, no other man ever would. “I think it’s best we act the same as we always have. At least when we’re in the company of others. And when it is just you and I, we can behave any way we like.”
“I don’t want anyone to find out about us.”
“Neither do I,” he said. “Not for a long while, at any rate.” Patrick stopped to point out a large rock in the path so Linley wouldn’t trip over it. “Your father is bound to find out once I start showing up in random parts of the world. I don’t know how many excuses I can make for visiting Machu Picchu.”
She laughed. “Will you really come visit me?”
“I will if you want me to.”
Linley squeezed his hand very tightly, and brought it up to her lips. “And I’d like to come and visit you from time to time,” she said, kissing each of his knuckles. “Surely I can manage a trip to London once or twice a year.”
“But where will we stay? You forget I sold my London house,” Patrick explained. “We cannot very well stay at your father’s cousin’s home, or at my sister’s…I suppose I could sleep at the club, but that would defeat the purpose of sleeping with you.”
“If I come to London, you are definitely not staying at your club.” Linley rummaged in her pocket with her free hand for her handkerchief. The weather was not at all warm, but beads of perspiration gathered on her forehead and at the back of her neck.
Patrick watched her dab at her skin, which was flushed dark pink. “Are you all right? Perhaps we’ve overdone it for today. You did have quite a night last night…”
“I am fine.”
They reached the top of the mountain half an hour later. She and Patrick stood on the peak, looking out across the tops of all the other mountains. Beyond their green tips, the white heads of the Himalayas cut through the otherwise endless blue sky. They were so tall and so vast that they hardly seemed real.
Amazing, really—the valley of the monastery so lush and green against the startling white of the mountains in the distance. It was as if they were two different worlds rubbing against each other. Linley and Patrick stood in silence, wondering how long it could last. How long could two opposite environments exist so closely?
Linley looked down into the valley below, but she could not see anything. The clouds shrouded the monastery, blocking it from above. It seemed to exist in a purgatory somewhere between the ground and the sky. The green and the white. Here and…where?
Seeing this had a particular impact on Patrick as well. How peaceful he felt at the top of the world. How utterly at home he seemed.
“I never imagined it would look like this,” he said. “Of course, I’ve seen pictures. But no photographs can compare.”
“Speaking of photographs,” Linley said, reaching into the small bag she carried across her shoulder. “I brought my camera.” She took the small black camera out of her bag and opened the little door at the front, which folded down to reveal the accordion-like bellow and lens. When she pointed it at the horizon, Patrick stepped out of the way.
“No,” she said. “I want you in it.”
Patrick stepped back into the frame. “How should I stand?”
Linley looked up and motioned with her hand. “Look out that way. At the mountains.” She glanced back down at the camera in her hands, holding it about chest level. When she felt she had the right shot, she pressed the shutter release button.
The shutter snapped, capturing the image of Patrick staring out at the Himalayas, his hands resting in the pockets of his trousers.
She wound the film and moved in closer, snapping another shot of him at close range.
“Let me take one of you,” Patrick said, holding out his hand for the camera.
He and Linley switched places, only this time, she faced the camera with the mountains in the background, her brown hair tousled around her face in the wind.
“Beautiful.” He took the photograph, and then closed the camera, handing it back.
They both sat down on the ground, looking out over the horizon. Their shoulders brushed, and Patrick put his arm around her. He held her for a long time before either of them spoke.
“Do you regret it,” he asked. “Do you regret last night?”
“No.”
Patrick barely waited for her to answer. “Because what’s done is done,” he continued. “And if someday you meet a man you’d like to marry, you will have to tell him about me. About this.”
“If I ever meet a man I want to marry, my lack of virginity will not change the way he feels about me,” Linley said. “He would be the sort of man who would accept me as I am.”
“A man wants to be his wife’s first.”
“But that’s not fair. Women have to accept the fact that our husbands will not be virgins on our wedding night.”
Patrick shook his head. “That is different.”
“How so?”
“I don’t know. If I married, I’d want to know that my wife…” He let out a long sigh. “It doesn’t matter. I am not getting married, so what do I care?”
“You want your wife to be chaste. You can say it, I’m not offended.”
“Linley…”
She smiled at him as best she could. “You’re right, a man expects his wife to be a virgin. I made my decision. I sealed my fate. I understood what I was getting myself into, and I am happy with my choice.”
“Truly?” He looked straight into her eyes.
Linley nodded. “Truly.”
Patrick bent his head down and kissed her. Linley
snuggled her head on his shoulder, again staring out at the mountains.
“You must think I’m awfully fast,” she said, watching the clouds swirl around some distant peak. “I threw myself at you like a chorus girl from the Gaiety.”
He laughed and hugged her tighter. “Gaiety girls appreciate a seasoned man.”
“I didn’t say I did not appreciate your experience. I just said it was unfair that men were not expected to be virgins. Women have to lay back and spread their legs, knowing that their husband has kept a mistress or lain with whores, and pray to God he doesn’t have a venereal disease.”
Patrick coughed and sputtered. “What do you know of venereal diseases?”
“I know I don’t want one.”
“Well, I don’t have any.”
Linley smiled. “Of course not, Patrick. I never meant to imply you did.”
“No, really. I take precautions,” he said. “I mean, I usually take precautions, but I didn’t bring any with me this time. I hadn’t expected anything to happen, so why would I? But, I’m normally very careful.” Patrick lifted her head off his shoulder and looked her hard in the face. “And you should be careful, too.”
Linley had no idea what he was talking about, but she nodded.
“Don’t just let some chap…”
“What?” she asked “Don’t just let some chap what?”
Patrick sighed. “I’ll teach you about that another time.”
Linley dropped the subject, thinking since Patrick was the one who knew all about those sort of things, he would tell her what she needed to know when the time was right. She did wonder who taught him about such things—his father? One of his friends? Maybe even Lady Wolstanton.
CHAPTER FORTY-FOUR
They intended to make love on that mountaintop. Patrick stripped down to his underclothes while Linley struggled with the buttons of her blouse. He did not see her hands tremble as she unfastened them, but once she slid the shirt over her head, he saw something else.
“What is that?” he asked, pointing at a patch of dark pink spots across the top of her chest. “A rash?”
A Love That Never Tires (Linley & Patrick Book 1) Page 26
