Evan nodded. It was one of about three things he could genuinely recall of what seemed like a million instructions regarding Sam’s plants, flowers and trees.
Oh, and the suc…suc…
Evan pursed his lips. Sam didn’t call them cactuses, he’d said something else, but Evan was too embarrassed to ask him what it was again. It seemed to him that all he did was ask questions, as opposed to ever actually doing anything. He needed to get a different job and either pay Sam and Aaron rent or find somewhere else to live all together.
I hate this town.
As he picked up the wooden ladder then carried it long ways—how Sam had shown him—he attempted to get his anger under control. He needed a strong man to give him a good thrashing. No one had touched him in close to two weeks. Gabriel had acted strangely toward him those final few days. He hadn’t been flogged or spanked or anything. That should’ve been an indicator as to what he could expect regarding his immediate future with his soon to be ex-Master.
His situation was ridiculous. There was a supposedly wonderful sadomasochistic club right down the road where he could go. Sam claimed he would love it, yet he refused to attend because his first Master was there with his new boy. He didn’t even care that Thomas and he weren’t together anymore. He was glad Thomas had someone who really did seem like a nice fellow. So why was he acting like such a juvenile?
He stopped at the end of the neatly planted row of orange trees. He was a bit spooked by the bumblebees that hovered over the blossoms that hadn’t turned into fruit yet. When he’d helped at his parent’s diner growing up, all he’d ever done was prepare and serve the food. He’d never gone out in the local fields to get it. In hindsight, he wished he’d been allowed to—then maybe he wouldn’t feel so useless at Aaron and Sam’s place. But his father was very strict and believed everyone had their own specific job to do within their large family. Other than his education, that his father had been adamant about, Evan had his tasks, and that was all he’d been allowed to concern himself with.
After checking to make sure that the ladder was as stable as he could get it on the uneven ground, Evan took a deep breath. He slung the canvas bag that he would use to collect the citrus over his shoulder, then hoisted himself up the rungs. When he reached the oranges that hung the lowest, he paused and eyed the immediate vicinity around them. There didn’t seem to be anything buzzing nearby, so he decided it was safe to pluck the first piece of fruit.
Gradually, he relaxed in the activity. He always made sure there were no bees flying too closely when he reached his hand to grab an orange. If one flew near him, he would still and wait for it to move on once it realized he wasn’t a flower.
Sam was right.
He’d explained that if Evan didn’t upset the bees, they would leave him alone. He’d said to be extra sure he didn’t go near a hive. If he saw one, he was supposed to let him or Aaron know. Apparently, there was a beekeeper nearby who they could call to come and remove the hive.
He climbed up the next rung to get to the higher fruit. There were some tucked farther in behind the other oranges and the dark green shiny leaves. He bit the end of his tongue, his brow furrowing as he concentrated on getting to the piece of citrus he was certain was ready to be picked. Right as he grasped the orb, something crawled across his hand. He yelped, yanking his hand back. The momentum sent him flying backward, the canvas bag sailing off his shoulder as he flailed his arms, desperately trying to keep from tumbling to the ground.
“Evan!”
He gasped as Thomas grabbed the ladder on either side, steadying it from behind him then leaning it back against the tree. He’d been prevented from falling and was safely encased in Thomas’ arms, except that his backside was level with Thomas’ face. The awkward position was rectified by causing an even more awkward one. Thomas encircled his waist then lifted him off the unwieldy ladder. He placed him on the ground then turned him around so they faced one another before letting him go.
“I’m not sure this is the best job for you.”
Thomas didn’t appear sore, only concerned. Evan glanced around furtively, wondering where Linus was.
“Linus is working right now.”
Evan lowered his eyes. Despite Thomas telling him not to behave as if they were still Master and boy, it seemed odd not to be that way with him.
“I see. So why are you here then?”
He cringed. He hadn’t meant for it to sound so unfriendly—especially since Thomas had maybe saved him from a broken bone or two. Thomas’ aggravated sigh caused him to lift his gaze.
“I’m sorry, M…Sir. I mean, Thomas.” He frowned. It was all so unnerving.
Thomas crossed his arms over his chest as he regarded him. He didn’t appear very happy.
“Come sit with me over here for a moment.”
Thomas indicated to a couple of wicker chairs shaded by a small oak tree nearby. Evan lowered his head again as he followed Thomas to the seats. Once they’d both had a moment to relax, Thomas cleared his throat.
“How are you getting on?”
Thomas had always been a very good man, and Evan had no reason to believe that had changed. He was certain that his ex-Master had stopped by because of a genuine interest in Evan’s well-being—to guarantee that he was…happy? Guilt over how he’d turned his back on Thomas still lived deep within him. Even if he’d never meant to, he’d hurt Thomas very much by believing Gabriel and the other club members’ lies. Yet Thomas had not only made sure he had somewhere safe to stay, but he’d purchased him clothing and bought him food. Evan’s lower lip trembled right as all of his bottled up emotions spilled out of him.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, Thomas.”
He dropped his head into his hands then let all the pent-up sadness, guilt and regret pour out through convulsive sobs. A gentle touch on his shoulder only made him cry harder.
“There, there. Let it out. Let it go.”
He wasn’t sure how long he went on weeping, but Thomas’ hand remained on his shoulder as more soothing words were uttered. After what must have been several minutes, he saw a white handkerchief swimming before him in his blurry vision. He nodded, taking it, not trusting his voice yet. After inhaling several deep, hiccupping breaths then wiping his face clean, he balled up the wet cloth in his fist.
“I-I’ll wash it then give it back.”
He dared to glance up at Thomas, who regarded him with a worried but kind expression. “That’s quite all right, Evan. You can keep it.”
Evan grunted. “More that I owe you.”
Thomas had removed his hand from Evan’s shoulder, and he found he missed it. Regardless of any past association or their mutual lack of interest in one another currently, it had been nice to have the physical connection with someone whom he was certain still cared about him as a person.
“Evan, you don’t owe me anything. You also mustn’t blame yourself for everything that happened between us. We all played our parts.”
Evan straightened. It didn’t make any sense. Of course it was all his fault.
“But you didn’t do anything wrong. I was the one who walked away, the one who didn’t trust you.”
“And I didn’t specify that you shouldn’t say anything to the club members about the piercing, nor did I go to them ahead of time to ascertain how they might react to it. If I’d pierced you before you told them, they would’ve obviously seen it the first instance we went back to the club. Instead, I left you vulnerable by not discussing all of that with you. There was a lot of miscommunication on both our parts.”
“Oh.” Evan wiped his nose with the handkerchief again. Thomas’ words were startling. “I…I never thought of it that way.” He peeked up at Thomas. “But I shouldn’t have believed what they said about you.”
Thomas regarded him with slightly narrowed eyes as if trying to uncover something hidden and buried. “You weren’t sure, were you?”
Evan shifted around on the scratchy seat. “Sure?”
; “About us. Did you need everyone to know before I did it—just in case?”
A sick feeling settled low in his gut. It wasn’t true. He’d wanted it, had been so excited about it he’d wanted everyone to know. “I…” His damn lip started quivering again and he couldn’t even begin to imagine why.
“It’s okay, Evan. I think it would be good for both of us to discuss this so we can let it go. My life is filled with so much joy now and I don’t ever want you to feel bad for me. I also want your happiness as well, I really do. Maybe if we can talk about what happened, you can move on and find a Master who’s worthy of such a wonderful boy.”
Evan gasped. “W-wonderful? But…how can you say that after I…I…” He bit his lip to hold the stupid thing still.
Thomas arched his eyebrows. “We both played our parts, remember? We had some beautiful years together, but in some ways, I think you needed more as a submissive than I was ever going to be able to give you as a Master. Perhaps I was anxious to mark you as mine out of fear that you might find someone more suited to your needs.” He locked eyes with Evan. “Perhaps you told everyone because as much as you ached to be claimed and may have genuinely loved me, somewhere inside you there was the fear that I wasn’t the right one.”
More. I’d always wondered if there was more.
Evan pressed his lips together. He wanted to stop himself from saying the truth, from agreeing with Thomas. He didn’t want to admit out loud that maybe the man he’d thought was the love of his life had not been that at all. Thomas was one of the best people he’d ever met, perhaps the best. It didn’t seem possible that he could ever hope to find someone as amazing as him again. Even if their relationship hadn’t included whatever mysterious component Evan longed for, it had been damn good. And there were very few opportunities for the type of relationship Evan desired—particularly with a man who would be ‘worthy’ of him the way Thomas had said.
Evan let out a mournful sigh. “Maybe.” He lowered his head, shame filling him.
Thomas laid a hand on his shoulder again. “Look at me. Come on.”
Evan lifted his gaze.
“That’s it. It’s done, Evan. You’re so very young. You have plenty of time to find a good Master—one who deserves you.”
The sick feeling came back. “Not young enough.”
Thomas sputtered out laughter then seemed to catch himself as if reacting to what must’ve been Evan’s grave expression. He scrunched his eyebrows together, examining Evan as if wondering whether his remark had been a jest or not.
“My God, Evan. Is that what Gabriel told you?”
He shrugged one shoulder. “Albert’s five years younger than me, and he’s a virgin.” Evan snorted. “Well. At least he was at the time.”
Thomas covered his lips with one hand as if hiding a smile before lowering it. “And you believe this makes you less attractive to a new Master?”
Evan didn’t want to get snippy, but he couldn’t believe that Thomas—the man who’d excitedly taken Evan’s virginity—was honestly asking such a thing. “You don’t need to pretend, try to make me feel better. Sam told me he was a virgin when Aaron claimed him, and there’s Linus—”
“Stop.” Thomas actually appeared angry, his cheeks flushed. “I told you before that I’m not discussing mine and Linus’ relationship because that’s our agreement, but you have no idea what you’re talking about in general. I think part of the problem is that you haven’t been to the club yet. Because if you had, you’d have met submissives who are with loving, adoring men who I hold in the highest of regard—and who were far from being virginal when they met their masters. In one submissive’s case, he’s also at least seven or eight years older than I am. Don’t allow that brute Gabriel to poison you with his horseshit. You’re a beautiful boy, Evan, and I know what you need.” Thomas leaned back in the rickety chair, crossing his arms in front of him again. “And I certainly can’t help you with it.”
Heat rose to Evan’s face. He knew what he needed too.
“Dammit, Evan. Why haven’t you come to the club all week? You could’ve at least had a good spanking by now. You’ve got yourself all tied up in knots. You need a strong hand to untie them.”
Evan chuckled in spite of himself. Thomas regarded him with a stern expression.
“Have you been hiding out here because Linus and I might be at the club?”
He was certain there was much more than a blush at Thomas’ words. His cheeks felt as though they’d caught fire.
Thomas nodded. “I thought so.” He tapped his fingers along the wicker armrest. “I need to make a telephone call in the morning, but I want you to plan on attending Hampton Road tomorrow night. If all goes as I think it will, Linus and I will come fetch you and give you a ride there.”
“But…won’t Linus…?”
“No, Evan. Linus isn’t worried about you coming between us. As a matter of fact, he knows I’m here right now. We discussed it before I came over. I would’ve left this for him to say to you, but in the interest of getting your stubborn behind to cooperate, he’s been concerned that you’re too isolated out here. He also felt that his relationship with me might be keeping you from the club and wanted to reassure you himself that he didn’t want to stand in the way of you meeting someone new.” Thomas took a deep breath. “Regardless, there’s a potential new member who has some concerns about the club. Well…about me that he needs addressed before he agrees to join.”
“You?” Evan couldn’t believe what he was hearing. It sounded like the old club members all over again. “If he’s new, what could he possibly have to be concerned about when it comes to you? He doesn’t even know you.”
“Which is exactly why he wants to talk to someone who does. He heard about the stories of me from Santa Barbara and he wants to verify that they weren’t true. If you don’t want to speak with him though, that’s your choice.”
Of course, I knew Thomas and I still believed the lies.
He lowered his gaze again. It would take a long time for him to forgive himself.
“Evan? Eyes up.”
“Yes, S…Thomas.”
God, he needed that. He needed someone to answer to.
Thomas sighed. “Once you’re at the club, you can go back to calling me ‘Sir’ like all the other boys there.”
There was the faintest of breezes, but it merely blew the warm air around. He caught the hint of the sweet smell of orange blossom before it dissipated.
Yes. The club.
“So, are you willing to speak with him? His name is Ned.”
“Is he…is he looking for a boy?”
Thomas paused, looking thoughtful—as if running a remembered moment through his mind. “Yes. Actually, I believe he is. You’ll meet with him then?”
Evan gave a little shrug to his shoulder again. “Sure. I can meet with him.”
Maybe Thomas was right. Maybe there were men out there who wouldn’t want a virgin after all.
* * * *
Ned waited in the library of the Hampton Road Club, the very same room he’d met with Saul and Thomas in only a couple of nights before. Thomas had rung him that morning to give him the delightful news that Evan had agreed to meet with him. In truth, he’d been close to throwing caution to the wind, signing the rules and purchasing a membership regardless. The admonishments contained in the list that Saul had given him were the most stringent he’d ever come across. He’d certainly never had to sign anything where he agreed he could be banished from an establishment for any slight toward a submissive he worked with. That, in and of itself, had spoken volumes to him. But his curiosity remained, and so he waited for Thomas’ ex-submissive to appear.
He’d made sure to get a stamp the moment he’d arrived. He’d waited long enough to play, and if the young man was attractive and amenable to a pairing for the evening, Ned was anxious to enjoy his charms. There was a timid knock at the library door and Ned’s heartbeat accelerated.
Yes. Too long.
; He stood. “Come in.”
A lovely young man entered the room, his eyes lowered. At first, Ned was taken aback to see Thomas following him, but then remembered one of the rules that stated the submissives were not allowed to wander about the mansion unescorted.
“Good evening, Ned. I won’t be staying, but I needed to show Evan to the library. I don’t know if you recall, but he can’t be left unattended. When you’re finished, would you mind calling for Javier to escort him to the submissives’ den?”
“And if I should wish the pleasure of his company tonight? I believe I would need to sign the rules first.”
Thomas noticeably brightened at his words. Ned took it as a good sign.
“Yes, correct. Then when you ring Javier, ask him to fetch Saul. He, or one of the other available board members, will come with me to the library to witness. Then after you’ve signed, he’ll file it away and you’ll be free to take Evan to a room with you.” Thomas jerked his head toward Evan. “If he agrees, that is.”
“Absolutely.”
Evan hadn’t so much as twitched throughout the discussion between him and Thomas and Ned had to admit he was impressed.
“Splendid.” Thomas directed his attention to the boy before him. “Evan, this is Ned Wilkinson.” Thomas raised his head. “Ned, this is Evan Baumgard.”
“Good evening, Evan. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”
As he regarded the partially clothed young man standing before him in perfect posture, shoulders straight, unslicked sandy blond hair hanging down his forehead, he ached to see his face. His lithe body was magnificent, his skin a sun-kissed gold. He was only a couple of inches shorter than Ned’s six feet.
He’d be perfect…
It was a bit soon to think beyond a night’s pleasure, but Evan seemed like an excellent choice for that. Evan still hadn’t responded. It was already obvious that he’d been meticulously trained. The boy hadn’t even flinched when spoken to. If Ned had trained him though, he would’ve expected him to respond immediately if another Dominant man spoke to him. It was one of the reasons Ned had already concluded that he needed to begin fresh with someone.
Mastering Love Page 4
