by Simon Archer
“Thank you, oh wise and benevolent ant queen.” Abdul began to bow incessantly as he backed away.
“Your thanks mean nothing to me, Abdul.” I glared hard at him. “I expect to be rewarded for this.” I shifted the candy in my mouth. “Richly.”
“And so you shall be.” He swallowed nervously before tucking his strange beaver tail between his legs and shuffling off. I watched him go as I sucked on my candy, and when he reached his compatriots, he began gesticulating wildly. It seemed that his fellows were upset with whatever he said, so he just turned and pointed at me.
I gave them the smile I reserved for disciplining unruly ants, and oddly enough, they all began to shiver at the sight of it. Not that I cared because they got back to work.
Satisfied, I turned back toward the field and surveyed the work we had done to remake the battlefield. It had barely been half a day, but already my ants had dug out many pits with which to hide traps as well as greatly widened the trench that surrounded the town.
Still, it was only half the width master had indicated, and there were only a third of the pits dug. It would be awhile yet until that was completed, but my workers did not tire. They would work until it was done, unlike those silly townsfolk with all their breaks. Why, if I’d had it my way, I’d have whipped them, but master had bid me not to, so I would not even though I was sure it would improve morale.
I suppose the townsfolk meant well, but as I made my way over to where my Hobgoblins were busily knapping arrowheads from stone while others were attaching the heads and fletching to the arrows, I couldn’t help but notice that they had produced over twice as many arrows as the archers that Jane had assigned to me had done. Still, at least, they were marginally useful, I supposed… though not by much, really.
Even as I watched them work, it was obvious the only way this town would be saved would be because of master and his plans because the vast majority of these people were not fighters or really anything but merchants. I had been told this was some kind of trade hub, and while I sort of understood the concept, it did not seem a worthwhile endeavor. After all, what was the point of amassing wealth when they were weak and could not defend their wares from attack?
Then again, I suppose that had been why Jane had been so happy to have master’s help because without it, well, they would be doomed.
I twitched my antennae, doing a quick survey of my workers. We had ants cutting down trees and digging holes while Hobgoblins did more intricate work. The golems were busy hauling around heavy materials to where the town’s crafters required them while the scouts searched for more raw material, mostly metal and certain kinds of stone.
We had even managed to find the strange ingredients master had asked us to deliver to the town chemist. While the sulfur had taken a bit of doing to locate, it hadn’t taken long to find a cave filled with bats and collect their guano, though I wasn’t sure why master had wanted it. Still, I had done my best to gather the sulfur and bat guano and give it to the chemist who had done nothing but burn wood to make charcoal all day.
Still, he had been delighted when we’d given him our findings and had set straight away to mixing the bat guano with various other components and then boiling it, which had caused a terrible smell that made me glad I’d had other tasks to occupy my time.
It was a rush of activity, but I had been created to command thousands of warriors, so I managed… though it was harder than I’d have liked. Perhaps it would be easier once I leveled up more, but there was no use in worrying about it now.
I took a huge breath and then blew it out to calm myself, and as I did, I heard the goblins begin to play their music. I quickly turned toward the direction of the gates in time to see master walk out with the goblins hot on his heels. Only there weren’t just the two strange goblins now. There was a whole menagerie of musicians playing a whole host of instruments I could not begin to understand.
Still, the sound of it was nice enough. I suppose that was the point because no sooner had they started playing then I felt master’s magic in the ground beneath my feet. It thrummed and pulsed and caused the earth to groan.
Then, as master’s magic spread further and wider, the dirt my ants had stacked up in crude walls behind the moat began to solidify and grow. It compacted itself into hardened stone as it grew taller and taller and taller until it had to be at least a dozen meters in height. Jagged, sharpened points sprang from all over its surface, and I wondered if that were so the enemy wouldn’t be able to scale it with ropes. If they tried, the sharpened edges at the top would soon cause the ropes to fray and break.
Even better, master had managed to make a wall almost twenty feet in length this time, which must have been why he’d brought the musicians out. When it had just been the two goblins, he had only managed five feet between rests.
It made me wish I could help more, but all I could do was gather materials for him to use. He’d briefly explained that having the raw materials made it easier, so I did the best I could to move all the dirt we dug to the walls, but it was hard because there was so very much to do.
“Queenie, I have brought you something,” Jane said from behind me, and when I turned toward her, she offered me a sugar plum which I greedily took and stuffed into my mouth. Only I did it with panache.
I was a queen, after all.
“Thank you, Jane,” I said with a nod before turning back to my work, only, before I could, I realized Jane was holding something out to me.
“Garrett asked me to have this identified and present it to you,” she said as she offered me the Dagger of the Ant Queen I had used in the time before I had been bound to master. “He said it would be a fitting gift for you.”
“A gift from master?” I said, and I could barely contain my happiness as I took it from her. The moment my hand wrapped around its silver hilt, I felt a surge of strength rush through me in a way I couldn’t quite explain, and better still, my control over all the ants seemed to increase.
“This will be perfect,” I murmured and made a mental note to thank master for his generosity later. “I had forgotten about this weapon, actually.” I held it out so that the blade glittered in the sun, and instantly, I felt a lot better. Or I would have if Jane wasn’t staring at me with concern on her face. “Is there a problem, Jane?”
“Queenie,” she said as she shuffled uncomfortably from foot to foot for a moment, which was most unlike the stoic warrior woman. “Is everything okay?”
“Everything is going well.” I swept a hand out at the field. “We have completed nearly a third of the pits.” I scowled over at the beaver-like creatures. “Once they stop building those stupid dams and get to work on the spears, master will be able to cover them with a thin sheet of dirt and rock so that they will look indistinguishable from the ground.”
“I will speak to Abdul.” Jane frowned. “That’s not what I meant, though.” She reached out like she would touch me and then stopped with her fingers inches from my shoulder. “Are you sure everything is okay?”
“Why would it not be?” I asked, suddenly confused. “My only source of frustration is from the laziness of your workers…”
“You cannot whip them,” Jane said seriously, and I sighed.
“Master has already forbidden it.” I sighed again. “Perhaps he will be more amenable to it if you speak to him after your next mating?”
“That…” Jane flushed. “That’s what I mean. You don’t mind that we’re, um…” She made an “O” with her fingers and then shoved another finger through it.
“I do not understand.” I frowned. “You are doing what?” I waved a hand at her strange motions.
“You do not mind that we are having sex?” The question seemed to embarrass her. “I mean, I know the two of you…” She looked like she was going to do her strange gesture again, but I waved it away.
“I only care that you satisfy him fully as he rightly deserves.” I stared at her in confusion. “I would only be upset if you failed in your dut
ies in that regard.”
“So, you do not mind sharing him with me?” Strange. She seemed a touch shocked by the idea.
“No. He is my master, and my only desire is to fulfill his every desire.” I met her eyes. “So, no. There is no problem.”
“Okay, then.” She nodded at me. “I don’t have a problem either.”
“Yes, you do.” I swept my hands at her people. “They are all so lazy.”
36
We'd barely finished the preparations when the Hobgoblin King's horn sounded across the land. As I looked up from my work beside the dozen Hobgoblin Archers I’d summoned to line the walls I’d erected, I couldn’t help but smile. Those walls had very nearly been the end of me, but I’d somehow managed it, even if I’d made all the town musicians play for like twenty hours a day for the last three days.
To be fair, they were much better now, and when they’d complained about not knowing that many songs, I may have taught them a few of my favorites.
Still, nothing could prepare me for the sight that approached us from the west because it wasn’t all hobgoblins. No, in addition to what had to be hundreds of well-armed hobgoblins, there were sixteen Forest Giants. While they, thankfully, weren’t armored, each one stood twenty feet tall and carried uprooted trees in their massive hands.
There was also a whole host of dire wolves and dire bears too, most of which were being ridden by armor-clad Hobgoblin Knights with giant lances. From the look of things, those with dire bear mounts appeared to be significantly more powerful than their dire-wolf-riding counterparts because their names were orange as opposed to yellow which meant that they were all within a level or two of me, and since I was level twenty-eight, I was guessing that they were all between level thirty and thirty-two.
What worried me wasn’t all of that. It was the massive golden throne that appeared behind the army. It was where the Hobgoblin King no doubt sat, though I couldn’t see him because he was shrouded from view by an orange curtain with a massive silver skull stitched into its center. In fact, the entire throne was covered from head to toe in bejeweled silver skulls, so it sort of reminded me of those weird sugar skulls I’d seen girls collect.
The throne was so massive that despite being on wheels, the entire thing was being towed by a team of four black-as-night giant scorpions that were each being ridden by golden-armored, skull-covered Elite Hobgoblin Knights. I swallowed a bit at that because each knight’s name was red. They were all significantly higher level than me. As my gaze flicked from them to the scorpions, I found that their names, Elite Giant Night Scorpion, were also a dreadful shade of scarlet. That wasn’t good because it meant that whoever sat upon that throne was no doubt even higher level than them.
Assuming, of course, I’d even get to fight them because as more and more armed Hobgoblins poured out onto the battlefield, I realized that Jane had been correct. This town had stood no chance of stopping the Hobgoblin King’s assault. In fact, even with me here, it was likely we’d get steamrolled, even with the few handfuls of troops the local duke had supplied earlier today.
Still, I was glad for them as it would make defending the place a fair bit easier.
“What do you wish to do, master?” Queenie said as she chewed thoughtfully on a piece of lime green taffy. She stood to my left, and when I turned to look at her, I saw her right hand clenched around the Dagger of the Ant Queen while her left hand held a large sack over one shoulder.
“We need to draw them into the main field between the treeline and the walls,” I said. Already, I could see them stopped on the edge of the battlefield, no doubt because they hadn’t expected to see the massive stone walls, but I hoped that the army would attack us soon.
“Perhaps we should just start firing at them?” Jane asked from my right, and I saw that the slime girl had used her body to create a sort of telescope with the slime around her left eye. “I have no doubt many of the duke’s archers can make shots from here.
“No.” I shook my head. “That will just make them either bunker down where they are or move back, and we need them to come into our killing field.” I was about to say more when what sounded like a trumpet blast erupted from the Hobgoblin King’s army.
I turned toward the sound to find a lone Hobgoblin with a wolf skull on his head and dressed in brightly dyed furs marching toward the gate. In one hand he held a horn that looked like it had come from a ridiculously large animal, and in the other, he held a rolled piece of parchment.
“The Herald,” Jane said, clearly catching my look of confusion. “The Hobgoblin King must want to parlay.”
“No doubt he wishes us to surrender,” I said, and at my words, Queenie nodded. “He probably wants to keep the wealth for himself and keep as much of the infrastructure intact while ensuring the minimal loss to his men.”
“Either way, as the Adventurers’ Guild representative, I should go meet the Herald,” Jane said, and as she spoke, her face turned into a stony mask of calm serenity that might have made me shiver if I’d not known her better.
“I think we should all go,” I said, and without waiting for a response, I turned to make my way down the walls. Queenie followed quickly after me with her large sack slung over one shoulder. I’m sure Jane said something about it, but I was already halfway down the wall by the time she caught up to us.
“You do not have to go,” she said, her eyes full of worry. “It could be a trap meant to kill us.”
“It isn’t,” I said, and I wasn’t sure why I was so certain the Herald wouldn’t attack us outright, and even if he did, his name was white, so I was sure I could kill him with ease.
“They may have snipers in the forest we cannot see who will shoot you dead,” Jane insisted. “They cannot hurt me because I am made of slime. You, on the other hand--”
“Master is strong and wise,” Queenie growled. “If he says he wishes to go, it will be so.” She glared at Jane. “Now act your rank and do as master says so he can save your town.”
Jane wisely just nodded to the Ant Queen as we hit the bottom of the walls where I found Morlaon, Jay, and all the town’s musicians, jugglers, and other assorted performers standing in the small square where I’d asked them to assemble.
“Morlaon, can you and your associates lay out a beat as we talk with the Herald?” I asked, and though the goblin bard swallowed hard with fear, he gave me a nod.
“We will play until we can no longer gasp even a single breath,” he said and then smacked a fist to his chest. “For we are bards, and we must play until the end.”
Jay gave me a quick thumbs up before unslinging his ukelele and strumming a tune that sent a wave of magic into the air. The others soon followed, and as I heard their sound rise up into the air, I couldn’t help but feel empowered by it both magically and on another more nuanced level, for the song they played was one of hope and courage, but most of all, it was a song of defiance.
Satisfied, I made my way to the giant stone gates I’d hewn from the very rock that my golems had torn from the earth. With a gesture and a bit of musical magic, I used my power to open them enough for my procession to step out.
The Herald was even uglier up close because his face and neck were covered with grotesque scars that looked like they’d been done on purpose. They created detailed scenes that should not have been etched into one’s skin.
“It’s a bold move to tattoo a man getting his head lopped off on your cheek,” I said as I nodded to the man. “Is it supposed to scare me because if it is, well, it’s not paying off, sorry to say.”
The hobgoblin’s beady, orange eyes narrowed into slits before he smacked his horn onto the dirt. “You will not be so bold once the King of Kings has ripped your tongue from your skull and used it to lick his ass.” The Herald gave me a grin that revealed his gold-capped teeth. “Which is precisely what will happen if you do not throw open your doors and surrender everything down to the last stick of straw in your pathetic little settlement to him. Then, if your town’s tri
bute suits him, you will be given the glorious option of serving him for as long as you can draw breath.”
He smiled evilly. “And if you should refuse, we will raze your village to the ground so that not even a single stone of it will remain.” His leering gaze fell on Queenie then. “Your women will be raped, and your men slaughtered. As for your children, you may ask?” He licked his lips. “We will roast them over a spit and have ourselves a feast.” He rubbed his belly. “For raiding works up a powerful hunger… for flesh.”
“Does that speech actually work?” I asked with a quirked eyebrow. “I mean, you’re really trying to sell it, but, I mean, how can I possibly agree to just let you have everything?” I shook my head as I took a step toward him. “Successful bargains usually have both sides getting what they want, and yours is particularly one-sided.”
“You have nothing with which to bargain because we are strong and will take what is ours.” The Herald spread his hands wide. “This all belongs to us, even if you do not realize it yet, because we are strong and you are weak beyond words.”
“Is that so?” I asked and then snapped my fingers.
Queenie struck out in a flash, driving her dagger to the hilt in the Herald’s belly before tearing it violently sideways and spilling his entrails across his feet like so much bloody jump rope. Then as he fell to his knees, eyes wide in shock, he tried to speak, but all that happened was blood burbled up his lips.
“It probably goes without saying,” I said as I gently tucked his insides back inside him before taking his bloody, spasming hands and using them to cover his wound. “But we refuse.” Then I whipped out my dick and pissed on him. When I was fully relieved, I glanced at Queenie. “We will wait for a better offer.” With that, Queenie opened the sack she’d been carried and dumped the desecrated heads of all the Hobgoblins we had killed during the siege onto the still-dying Herald.
