Stella scanned through some clothes as Russel and Cedric looked together. She found a cute pair of leggings, a white sweater, boots, a scarf, a coat, a hat, every warm fuzzy piece for a cozy and cute winter outfit. She always loved those patterned leggings and long dressy coats with buttons on the front. The boots she found went just below her knees and were black leather. God, this stuff was expensive.
She should have put it all back, but she held on to it while she proceeded to pick out some items that were actually reasonable—or what she thought was reasonable. She couldn’t remember the last time she handled money. Even so, she couldn’t bring herself to put down the winter outfit she picked out because she couldn’t stop wondering what it would be like to dress in something nice again. She did have faint memories of doing that once, of her parents spoiling her.
It had been years since she had experienced that. Eleven years to be exact. That was almost half of her life.
She could at least try it all on.
Stella slipped away into one of the dressing rooms and put everything on, including the boots and the hat. She examined herself in the full-body mirror. She looked good in this. No one could tell how skinny she had become when she was all bundled up. Then again, this kind of skinny wouldn’t last long if Cedric kept providing them with excellent food. They had a full-on breakfast smorgasbord before they left for Kids Fun ‘N Stuff. She was still full, but oh so satisfied.
Stella frowned. Cedric had seen all of her scars. She showed him. He knew how skinny and weak she was too, but he didn’t say anything. She was sure he had questions, but he didn’t ask them. Was he worried she would get angry? He was probably right. She probably would have gotten angry if he had tried to pry further. Maybe not anymore though. Maybe it would feel good to tell Cedric everything that happened. Would he be able to help her carry that pain?
Wishful thinking. That was definitely wishful thinking.
Stella sighed and moved to take off the cute winter clothes, but then she wondered what Cedric would think. She wanted to see his reaction to her wearing something that fit, something she picked and was confident in. Would he get hard for her again? The billionaire snowy owl had bizarre taste. How anyone could find her attractive in this state was a mystery to her. God, but it felt good. It felt good to be desired by a gentleman who never pushed. She had her suspicions he never would. He tiptoed around her. Any advances would have to come from her.
Did she want that? Advances could lead to sex. Sex had never been enjoyable, but she had never had it willingly.
She frowned and shuddered at the thought of Tyler. She pushed the unpleasantness away and walked out of the dressing room. Cedric was hanging around, waiting for her and Russel as they tried things on.
“You look nice,” Cedric said immediately. Flatterer.
But she totally did look nice, the best she had in eleven years. She nodded her head at his comment because she didn’t know how to say “thank you” to this man or anyone besides Russel really.
“I don’t need it,” she commented. “It’s all expensive.”
“Money isn’t really an issue where I come from. If you want it, you should get it.”
“Why? Why would you do that for me?”
“Because I want to. Because you look really happy.”
Mr. Snow was wearing sunglasses, a double-barrier for his already hard to read eyes. Stella looked at herself in the full-body mirror outside of the dressing rooms. She really did like it.
“You’re sure you don’t mind?” she whispered.
“I want to,” he repeated.
Well, Stella wasn’t going to bother saying no to that. She could sense his sincerity. What harm could it do?
Once she and Russel had tried everything on and picked out the things they wanted to keep, they joined Cedric at the register as he paid. Stella questioningly held out the clothes she picked as Cedric placed it all on the desk in front of them. He took it without hesitation. He wasn’t having any second thoughts then.
When they were all checked out, they left the clothing store and Stella insisted on carrying some of the bags so Cedric wasn’t hauling everything.
“I really don’t mind,” he said when she insisted again.
“Well, I do,” she muttered.
Sighing, Cedric gave in and handed her a couple of the bags.
“Thank you,” Stella said under her breath, but she found the words. “For all of this.”
Cedric grabbed her arm before she could turn away. A thin layer of fabric was the only thing stopping the bare skin of his palm from touching her Lunas Sigil. His touch was warm all the same.
“Sorry,” he said quickly and let her go. “Just… you’re welcome. No problem. I’m happy to do it.”
So Cedric Snow could get flustered. Stella smiled at that.
Russel looked at the two of them with crinkled eyebrows, and then he shrugged as he walked ahead of them, peeking into the many stores located inside of the huge mall.
Their next stop was a little shop with way too many choices of chocolate. Naturally, they had hot chocolate in abundance because of the cold and the holiday quickly approaching. The entire store was filled with Christmas, red, green, gold, and silver. It made Stella remember a warm Christmas with her old pack. Recently, the buried good memories were beginning to surface again.
“Which one looks good?” Cedric asked.
Russel’s eyes were as wide as saucers as he looked at all the choices. “Uh. What’s the white stuff in this one?”
“Marshmallows. They’re sweet. You’d probably like them.”
“What about this one?”
“It says dark chocolate. It’s kind of bitter.” Cedric paused. “Ever do much reading, Russel?”
Russel dropped his eyes to the ground. “No.”
“That’s fine. I was just asking.” Cedric tapped his shoulder. “How about the marshmallows? This one has snowflake marshmallows. Pretty fancy.”
Russel brightened up again and nodded his approval.
Things like that made Stella marvel over Cedric all over again. He was a rich snob, right? Or he was supposed to be. That was what the world called him, but a rich snob wouldn’t have made a ten-year-old boy feel okay about being illiterate. Now, Stella wasn’t saying Cedric was okay with it, but he certainly didn’t see any value in making Russel feel bad over it. That was something special. She couldn’t believe Cedric Snow cared about her son. Time and time again he showed it. He really did.
He really did.
Their last stop was a store full of what people labeled boy toys. Basically, it was all of those building kits, planes, cars, that sort of thing. Stella was never mechanically inclined, but her son was in heaven. He and Cedric were scoping out the model planes in particular. Russel really wanted something that flew, and he wanted to understand how by building it himself. They ended up picking up a Spitfire model kit, some sort of plane Stella knew nothing about.
“It really flies?” Russel asked again.
“Yeah, Russ.” Cedric laughed. “It really flies. I’ll help you assemble it and explain what I know.” He leaned in close and whispered in Russel’s ear so no one but him and Stella would hear. “I happen to know a thing or two about flying, although planes are different from birds.”
“You can help me start, and tell me what you know, but I want to do most of it on my own,” Russel said.
“You got it.”
Cedric roughed up Russel’s hair as Russel laughed and smacked his hand away.
These two had bonded so thoroughly in such a short amount of time, it was almost like a slap in the face for Stella. A part of her was seriously jealous. The other part of her was enchanted. Every time she looked at Cedric, her Moon Mark reacted now. What it was trying to tell her with that constant flow of warmth, she wasn’t sure. Ah, but he made her heart flutter, and her legs weak. Her sex was tingling, too. That was a new sensation, and one she hoped no one caught on to. Because she didn’t quite understand it herse
lf. She had never been aroused before Cedric came into her life, certainly not with Tyler.
The last stop they made in the mall was for a picture frame. It was a crafty store, so Cedric managed to find one that fit the rainbow unicorn drawing he had done with his daughter. Russel helped him pick out a frame, a white one that stood neutral against all the color. Stella’s heart squeezed at the sight. She was pretty sure it was going to burst out of her chest. Cedric valued the picture he colored with his daughter. He was sweet, kind, and so good. He was drilling his way inside of her heart without trying.
The drive back to Cedric’s cabin was more of Cedric and Russel talking and enjoying each other’s company. The snow was coming down again, and Stella kept quiet. She came to a conclusion, though. Her son wasn’t simply enchanted with Cedric Snow. He loved him. Plain and simple. The way he looked at the man was full of adoration. He admired him, sought his approval. Russel had never had a good male role model in his life, and Stella never thought the one he would find would end up being Cedric Snow, but that was where things led them.
Cedric was a good man. She could say that. She could trust him. He had proved himself to her. He was the kind of man she wanted her son to have as a guide in his life. A snowy owl and a couple of wolves. Who would have thought? But it worked.
When they arrived at the cabin, they grabbed their things, trudged through the snow, and made their way inside. Russel wasted no time setting everything down on the kitchen counter except for his Spitfire model kit, which he held on to as he ran to Cedric’s old bedroom.
“Someone’s excited,” Cedric commented as he removed his hat and sunglasses. He flashed Stella a smile that made her heart beat a little faster. Now she could see his eyes, and they were hiding nothing. Cedric was happy.
“You better get in there, or he’ll start without you,” Stella said.
“Yeah, we’ll see how long he lets me help. He seems determined to do this on his own.”
“Will he be able to if he can’t read?”
“I guess we’ll find out, and reading is something we should start working on. What level is he on?”
“I taught him the alphabet when I got a chance. I wrote the letters in the dirt. I taught him how to spell a few words, but writing in the dirt doesn’t get you anywhere fast, especially when there are large gaps in between learning.” She shrugged. “I’m not that great of a reader or speller myself. I mean, I’m okay. I made it to a ninth-grade level at least. Sometimes I got my hands on a book, so I’m not too rusty, but it never lasted long. Russel’s smart though. If you got him an easy book and worked up from there, he’d catch up quick. I’m sure of it. Right now, if you give him enough time, he can usually sound most words out.”
Cedric nodded his head but didn’t ask about the letters in the dirt or any clarification about the situation. The way his golden gaze lingered on Stella told her he wanted to, though. He was waiting for some reason.
“You said we. How long do you plan on us sticking around?” Stella asked. “You don’t want to get rid of us?”
He shrugged. “You’re both growing on me.”
“Hm.” Stella huffed. “Go, Mr. Snow. My boy is waiting for you.”
“You’re not coming?”
“I am, but I’m not the one he’s waiting for.”
Cedric raised a light silvery eyebrow at her, but he listened and made his way into Russel’s room. Stella lingered in the kitchen for a moment longer. She looked through the bags they brought in and decided to put some things away. She placed that unicorn Cedric had colored with his daughter on the entertainment set and brushed her fingers across it as if she’d be able to draw in some of the warmth that was used to create it. Then she wandered into the room Cedric and Russel were in.
They were well on their way to assembling the plane already. The smiles on their faces were so bright and vivid. She had to smile too, even though she was only lingering in the background and offering nothing in this situation.
Cedric read instructions out loud and helped Russel make a good dent in the complicated kit. There were a lot of little parts. According to Cedric, this was a relatively easy plane to assemble, but Stella was never good at following instructions and building something. Russel was her complete opposite in that. It took him no time at all to follow Cedric’s instructions.
“Okay!” Russel exclaimed. “I’ve got the rest. Both of you get out so I can finish.”
Russel jumped up from the floor, grabbed Cedric’s hand and pulled him up too. Then he proceeded to push him from behind.
“Okay, okay, I’m leaving,” Cedric said as he put his hands up in the air and walked forward. “If you need any help, just ask.”
Stella stepped back in time for Cedric to clear the doorway just as Russel slammed the door shut.
“I guess that’s it then,” Cedric remarked.
“He’ll have it done in the morning,” Stella said.
“I wouldn’t put it past him. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone so enthusiastic about a model airplane before.”
Stella frowned, realizing she got kicked out of her room too. She knocked on the door. “What about sleep, Russ?”
“Pick another room. There’s enough.”
“Russel!” Stella scolded.
“But I’m going to be up late. You won’t be able to sleep.”
Stella’s frown deepened, but she turned away from the door to see Cedric grinning at her.
“He’s never slept by himself before,” she murmured.
“It’s good. It means he’s comfortable,” Cedric pointed out. “He’s ten years old. He should be sleeping in his own bed.”
Stella nodded her head slowly. “He’s getting so tall, growing into a man. I feel like I missed that somehow.”
Cedric’s grin softened. “I’m turning in for the night. See you in the morning, Stella.”
He squeezed past her so he could make his way up the stairs. Their marks brushed ever so briefly. Even with the fabric of their long sleeves in the way, that touch sent a shot of energy through Stella’s body. She looked up at Cedric, and he looked back with molten gold eyes. She was pretty certain she was going to melt into a puddle. Her internal body temperature was off the charts. Her thighs trembled and her sex tingled, begging for this man to do… something.
“Goodnight, Stella,” Cedric said quickly as he tore away from her.
She watched his fleeting form as he disappeared up the stairs. He took the warmth with him, leaving her cold. She had never felt such intense heat, nor had she ever felt so alone.
Chapter 13
PICKING A ROOM TO sleep in alone was no simple matter. The room itself wasn’t the issue. It was finding a way to fight off the loneliness that was hard, and Stella hoped one of the rooms would be able to do that for her. She ended up foregoing a bedroom entirely and lay on the couch in the living room. She had a blanket. She wasn’t cold. She was a little closer to her son and Cedric by lying here, but she just couldn’t fall asleep.
The shadows and faint light of the Moon and stars above danced along the walls, creating monstrous shapes. She closed her eyes to stop thinking about them, but they played across her eyelids. Relentless shadows.
It was four in the morning, and she hadn’t gotten a wink of sleep.
Enough was enough. This was ridiculous.
Stella jumped off the couch and crept to Russel’s room. The light in his room was off. Good. She hoped he wouldn’t stay up all night working on his new toy.
Quietly, she opened the door, casting a block of light into the room. The first thing she saw was a mostly finished model plane sitting on the floor. Russel hadn’t needed any more of Cedric’s help after all. It was definitely a crime that a kid as smart as him had been stifled for his entire life. He deserved the best of everything.
She felt like crying when she glimpsed Russel on his bed, curled up in a blanket. His back was facing her. He was breathing long and deep, fast asleep. She could crawl into bed beside him. She
could make room without waking him up.
She looked down at the Lunas Sigil on her left forearm when it glinted in the light. Russel had one of these too. Both of theirs mirrored Cedric’s.
Cedric.
Maybe Stella could secure a bright future for her boy after all. She could give him the world if she convinced Cedric to keep them. He was a man who had everything. He was kind. If he kept them, she knew Russel would never want for anything again.
She swallowed nervously and closed Russel’s door as she left. She tiptoed up the stairs to the room Cedric had been staying in since he arrived. It was probably his parents’ before. It was big and had its own fancy bathroom, the one Stella used for her bath.
Before she was even standing outside his room, she noticed light seeping through into the dark hall from the small crack underneath the wood door. Why was his light still on? Was Cedric Snow having a hard time sleeping too?
As soon as she made it to the door, the light flickered off. Now he was going to bed?
Stella opened the door without knocking. She wasn’t quiet about it either. It slammed into the wall, announcing her presence with a bang. Cedric was standing at the edge of his bed, about to crawl in. His eyes flashed gold in the dark as he stared at her. She guessed she had startled him, but he had his mask on again. His emotions were unreadable even to her sensitive nose.
He wasn’t wearing a shirt, so his fair and flawless skin was beautifully on display. He was nice to look at. Hopefully, he’d be nice to touch intimately as well.
“What?” he asked. “Is something wrong?”
“I want sex,” Stella said bluntly.
Cedric balked. He replied, “I don’t.”
“Lie. I know how attracted you are to me. I can smell it on you, and I’ve seen it.” Her eyes went to where his cock was once again announcing Cedric’s want for her, his need.
Sighing, Cedric rubbed his eyes tiredly. “Why do you want sex all of a sudden? I thought you didn’t like me.”
Instead of answering, Stella walked up to him, shifted on her tiptoes, grabbed the back of his neck, and pulled him down so their lips met in a fierce kiss. Cedric sucked in a sharp breath through his nose, and Stella was afraid he’d jerk away, so she held him tighter, kissed him deeper.
Her Noble Owl (Marked By The Moon Book 4) Page 10
