Once I get a theory in my head, it’s hard to shake it.
“You know I wasn’t touching you like that,” I breathe, squeezing the strap of my book bag. I try to keep the hurt from my voice, but it comes out anyway, and Chasm falters, cursing and mumbling in Korean. It shouldn’t be so cute, but it is. I try hard not to like it and fail. Actions not thoughts. Actions. “You seem stressed, and you never messaged me back. Your dad was visibly upset last night. Now, you seem gun-shy about being touched.” I look him straight in those amber eyes of his. “So, did he hit you?”
Chasm lifts the edge of his lip up and then growls something out that I don’t understand. I’m going to learn this boy’s language someday, I swear it—and I don’t just mean Korean.
“No, he never hits me …” Chasm starts, but then he sighs and tosses his book bag to the ground, stripping off his blazer and undoing the buttons at his wrist. He shoves the left sleeve of his black dress shirt up, revealing a sea of tattoos and, upon closer inspection, a few finger-shaped bruises. “He didn’t like me missing class yesterday.” Chasm doesn’t look at me when he talks, but he lets me touch his skin carefully as I inspect the damage.
Fury fills me a in a violent wave of heat. I could kill that bastard for hurting his son.
Kill.
Could I though, really? Kill someone?
Like father, like daughter, a voice whispers in my head and I shiver, shaking the dreadful feeling off and letting it burn beneath the heat of spring sunshine.
“I’m sorry, Chasm.” I trace my fingers over his bruises, and he jerks back from me.
“No offense, but I’m not going to class pitching a tent. Stop touching me,” he breathes out, yanking his shirt down his arm angrily. If he’s that upset with me now, wait until he hears about the condom situation.
I feel like such an asshole, almost … almost like I made the wrong choice. But I know I didn’t. I know that. So what’s this? I’m in love with two boys instead of just one?
Oh.
Mm.
Sometimes the answer to a tricky problem lies outside of convention.
“Tess never messaged you last night?” I hazard, honestly surprised that she didn’t. Actually, if I think about it, that scares me even more. What if she’s waiting to talk to him in person?
Chasm throws me a wary look as he pulls his blazer back on.
“Fuck. What happened now?”
“You remember that condom you helped me dispose of?” I begin, and he just stares at me.
“You’re fucking shitting me?” he chokes out, making the connection like the soon-to-be valedictorian that he is. “She found it?”
“Actually,” I start, watching as he picks his book bag up and tosses it over his shoulder like an anime character. Oh yes, Chas would be the mean-spirited school bully with a heart of gold who only shows his soft side to the heroine. “The FBI found it.”
More staring from him.
I can only imagine what he’s feeling right now. He came over to confess to me. More specifically, he brought me flowers. Instead, he ended up giving me and Parrish a condom and covering for us not once, not twice, but three times now. He’s not the one who had sex, and he’s being punished for it.
I don’t just owe him big-time; I’ll give him whatever he wants.
“Tess implied it might be DNA tested unless …” I rub at my face with my right hand. “Unless it was mine. She remembered you throwing the trash out, and I was wearing your clothes last night …”
Chasm just turns away from me and heads for the front doors of the academy, shoving his way through them and running right into Lumen.
“In a hurry, Kwang-seon?” she challenges, giving him a cocky smile. “Test results were posted today; I’m beating you by a fraction. Catch up, kid.”
He curses at her, shoving past and disappearing down the hall while I slip in the doors and wish I could just sleep for an entire year. Better yet, I’d like to sleep through the rest of high school.
“What the hell is his problem?” Lumen queries, tapping at her glossy lower lip with a single finger. I may as well tell her: it doesn’t violate any of Justin’s rules.
“Tess found the condom I used with Parrish and since I can’t exactly admit the truth, I threw Chasm under the bus.” Was that the right choice to make? Maybe I should’ve just told Tess the truth?
Lumen pauses for a moment, her perfect full mouth making a small ‘O’ of surprise. And then, because she is Lumen Hearst, queen of the school, she cackles at me. The sound echoes down the hallway, causing shifty eyed looks to be sent our way.
Why didn’t I realize until now that I was playing in a pit of vipers? These people aren’t nice; I’m a curiosity, protected by Lumen and Parrish and Chasm. I need to remember that. Their reactions to Parrish’s disappearance are disturbing.
I can’t forget that I screamed to Tess that I was dating Lumen. Now she thinks I’m sleeping with Chasm. What a clusterfuck. At least she didn’t bring up the former part of that equation last night. I can only deal with so much embarrassment in a single evening.
“Oh, honey, you should’ve stuck with me.” Lumen leans down to whisper in my ear. “You don’t need a condom with a girl. No evidence.” And then she licks the shell of my ear, and I’m slapping her away while she laughs again.
“Parrish is still missing you know,” I remind her, and she gives me a look, reaching up to check her ponytail for perfection.
“I’m sure he’ll be fine,” she says, but some of her usual confidence is missing. “How do you know he didn’t just take off for some sun and space? Tess is like a wisteria vine, one of those ones that strangles the trees it attaches to.”
I mean, she isn’t wrong about the Tess part, and I don’t have the energy to argue with her about Parrish, so I let it go.
At lunch, Chasm appears outside my classroom looking annoyed but resigned.
“You made the right choice, Little Sister,” he tells me grudgingly, holding out a cold soda can like a peace offering. I take it and pop the top, taking a sip so he has time to think about what else he wants to say. It’s clear he’s been thinking about this all day. “Tess can’t find out. What if she does something crazy like … I don’t know, ship you back to New York?”
I pause with the soda halfway to my lips for a second drink. Just a few months ago, I would’ve done literally anything to go home. Now, Parrish is counting on me, and I cannot fuck this up.
“You think she’d do something like that?” I whisper as people pass by us on either side, their assessing gazes and whispers so prevalent that Chasm eventually snaps.
He gives this harsh, mean laugh that raises goose bumps on my arms and legs.
“Y’all better keep that shit to yourselves. I know enough to bury each and every one of you under a pile of scandals.”
“Get fucked, Kwang-seon,” someone bites out, and I recognize him as the boy that tried to throw garbage into the lake near Chas’ place. “Unlike everybody else, I don’t think Parrish is just on vacation. He’s probably lying in a ditch somewhere.” The guy makes a slicing motion across the front of his throat. “Slayer probably cut him into little pieces. Even the gamer geek thinks that.”
Chasm just laughs softly and then, before I can even think to stop him, he’s throwing a punch that knocks that guy’s head back, dropping him to the floor in a heap. Blood runs from his nose as he clutches desperately at his face and groans pitifully.
Nobody steps in to help, not even the guy’s friend. They all just sort of … watch?
“You think Parrish needs to come back for you to get your ass kicked, bro?” Chas squats down next to the guy, shaking out his hand. He purrs something in Korean, but it may as well be the language of demons the way it sounds.
The guy’s eyes widen, and he scrambles to his feet, swiping at his bloody nose with his tie.
The crowd disperses with a caucus of disappointed grumbling.
Apparently, they expected a better show.
Chasm stands up and turns to me, rubbing his knuckles on the front of his shirt like they might be sore.
“I have an idea,” he tells me, as if he didn’t just clock some dude in the face. He looks down at me and smirks as I gape back at him. “I think I can get ahold of Mr. Volli’s keys.”
“Are you insane?” I whisper back, looking around for an administrator. No way that guy doesn’t rat Chasm out. He could get expelled, suspended at the very least. Assault charges might even be on the table.
Chas blinks at me for a moment and then glances over his shoulder at the small spatters of blood on the floor. He reaches out with his shoe and sort of rubs them away.
“Better?” he asks, almost like it’s a joke. But then he offers up what I can only describe as a pitying sort of smile. “Didn’t I warn you about Whitehall? I said you had bite, but I wasn’t sure if it was enough. Prove me wrong, Little Sister.”
“Everyone warned me about Whitehall,” I murmur back warily, realizing not for the first time how damn lucky I was to fall under the protection of the school’s royalty. Jesus. As much as I’d like to press for more information, we have better things to do. “You can get his keys, how?”
I’d really like to head to the theater to help with the rest of the cleanup, but Parrish comes first.
“Follow me,” Chas says, heading down the hall toward the elevator. He swipes his student badge, and I cock a brow. “Perks of being one of Ms. Miyamoto’s favorite students.” He swings the lanyard around in his hand and smirks at me, holding out his bruised hand when the doors ding open. “After you, Little Sister.”
I step in and he follows after me, pressing the button for the bottom floor and sending us back to the office space I saw on my first day here. Ms. Miyamoto greets Chasm in Japanese when she sees him, and he responds in kind, seemingly fluent in a third language.
Why does he have to be so smart? It’s … undeniably attractive.
“Miss Banks,” Ms. Miyamoto greets, nodding her chin in my direction. “What can I help the two of you with?”
“Well, we were actually just hoping to get that volunteer form from you …” Chasm begins, gesturing in my direction. “That way I can officially record my hours tutoring Dakota. For my college applications, of course.”
My eyebrow twitches, but it isn’t a bad excuse for coming down here, and he really has helped me with my classes. I’m not failing a single one anymore.
“Absolutely. Let me go and grab it,” she says, standing up from her desk and disappearing down a stone hallway to the right. Chasm waits for the sound of a door opening and then moves around to the back of the desk.
“You keep watch,” he murmurs, grabbing her purse and digging around in it. I hate to betray a woman who’s arguably the kindest and best teacher on campus, but this is life-or-death. It’s fascinating how things that once seemed so important mean nothing in the face of such drastic consequences. “Bingo.”
Chas pockets the keys before I have much of a chance to contribute, waiting at the entrance of the hall until he’s safely back on the appropriate side of the desk.
“Found it,” Ms. Miyamoto declares, waving the page around in her right hand. “You’d think they’d want this sort of thing to be recorded digitally,” she murmurs under her breath, scribbling some things down on the form and then offering it up to us. Chas fills out a few fields, and I’m left to initial all the times that he says he’s been tutoring me.
Just seeing all those hours there on paper makes me realize just how much time this boy has invested in me. And all he asked in return was for me to keep a secret about how kind he is to drunk girls at parties. That doesn’t seem like much of a fair trade at all, does it?
“Take this with you and continue to fill it out for any additional tutoring days. I’ll sign off and collect it on the last day of school.” She smiles at us, her red lipstick reminding me of my Grandma Carmen, and guilt sweeps over me in a wave.
I’m going to have to get used to that, aren’t I? Feeling guilty … There’s going to be a hell of a lot more of that before this thing is over.
“I appreciate you,” Chasm says, giving a respectful bow before we both climb back on the elevator. He’s likely the only student in the school whose badge can call the elevator. Guess I really am choosing my pawns wisely, huh?
“What happens when she finds her keys are missing?” I whisper as soon as we’re off the elevator. Chas just shrugs and slips his hands in his blazer pockets.
“Uh, we’ll toss them in a plant and walk away? Let fate decide.” He guides us down the hall to Mr. Volli’s classroom, putting his back to the security camera before surreptitiously removing the keys. “I’ll go check with my CSC girls later to deal with the security footage,” he tells me, referencing the computer science club.
“Chasm,” I start as he unlocks the door, grabbing my wrist and yanking me inside before he closes and locks it behind him. He makes his way over to the office door immediately, trying the handle and then cursing when it doesn’t unlock. He starts trying keys as I move up beside him. “You don’t have to pretend there are girls when there aren’t.”
“There are plenty of girls,” he tells me, moving through the massive ring of keys in quick succession. “Why wouldn’t there be? Just because I don’t sexually assault drunk girls doesn’t mean I don’t have friends.” He finally lands on a key that works, turning it and giving a little fist pump at the sound of the deadbolt sliding free.
“Personally, I think you’re a virgin,” I tell him, and he pauses, one hand on the doorknob, his face turning to look at me. We’re standing a little too close, but I tell myself it’s because we’re on a secret mission to catch a serial killer. Nothing else. There cannot be anything else. “I don’t know why, but all your slutty guy talk just sounds like bravado to me, like cover.”
I turn around, reaching for the knob and expecting Chasm to let me take it. Instead, he stays where he is, and my hand closes over his. I can even feel his breath stirring my hair against my neck, making me shudder and squeeze my hand even more tightly around his.
“You know I love Parrish, right?” he says, and I nod, because I do. He wouldn’t be doing all of this if he didn’t. Wouldn’t have moved a dead girl’s body. Wouldn’t have tackled a man with a gun. Wouldn’t have shot a rapist’s corpse. “If you were with any other guy—I mean really, any other guy except maybe Maxx—I would try to take you from him. Shit, it would be war. I would wage it, Dakota.”
He exhales, and my hair flutters again, teasing me, making me wish it were his lips instead.
I tell myself it’s because of all the trauma, like I’m leaning into Chasm because I miss Parrish. In reality, it’s because I realized yesterday that I liked them both the same. Parrish was simply first. If the world were different, if I could have a harem like an anime girl, then I would invite Chasm in.
“I would never betray Parrish,” I promise him, and I mean that, turning around abruptly and once again, expecting that Chasm will step back to make space. Instead, he stays right where he is, looking down at me, a boy who brought me sunflowers and ended up giving me condoms to use with his best friend. “Never.” This word, it’s a whisper.
“Do you want to know what I said to him that day?” he asks me, and I vaguely remember Chasm saying something to Parrish in Korean after giving us the condoms.
“I do,” I breathe back, but before he gets a chance to speak, the door to the classroom opens and there’s Mr. Volli, sweet, well-dressed, glasses-wearing Mr. Volli who loves Sylvia Plath and constantly quotes Emily Dickinson during his app development lessons.
“Ms. Banks, Mr. McKenna.” He moves into the room, closing the door behind him as Chasm steps to the side, pushing me behind him like he’s willing to die to protect me. I can’t think about that, so I just step up beside him and ignore the angry look he tosses my way. “If the two of you would like to sea
rch my office, go right ahead.” He opens the door for us and pushes it aside, holding his hand out in invitation.
I notice right away that there’s a walking stick in the corner. It reminds me of that day that I passed by the teacher’s lounge and got a glimpse of a walking stick then, too. Was it the same one? Is this the one that was used to attack Maxx during our hike?
Mr. Volli notices the direction of my stare and smiles pleasantly. Could he really be my father? Could he really be the Slayer? My gamer brain tells me there’s no way. You don’t fight the boss on the first level. It just doesn’t work that way. Another sub-boss. A dungeon boss. Not an endgame boss.
“Do you like the souvenir I took from Mr. Fosser? It’s beautiful, isn’t it? I’m fairly certain that the wood is blackthorn.”
“What the hell are you playing at?” Chasm snarls, squeezing his hands so hard around the keys that I worry he might be hurting himself. “What’s the point of all this?”
The teacher turns his head to look at me instead, studying me with those light brown eyes that I always thought held such kindness. Either I’m a terrible judge of character or Mr. Volli is a consummate actor. Maybe both. How could I have sat in his classroom for months and not picked up on anything? That other guy—Mr. Fosser—he just smelled wrong.
“If you’re looking for clues, you’ll have to be a bit cleverer,” Mr. Volli says, moving past us into the office and taking a seat at his desk. He rifles through some papers, and then turns to his computer, as if we aren’t even there. As if he didn’t catch us trying to break into his office. Not that it matters anyway. He can’t exactly report us, right? We’ve got dirt on him, too. “The Slayer is meticulous. I hope to learn from him as well.” He gives me another smile, one that feels too genuine to be fake. I start to wonder if he isn’t crazy, if he really means what he’s saying. “You’re lucky to have such an intelligent and careful man for a father.”
Payback Princess (Lost Daughter of a Serial Killer Book 2) Page 4
