“I’m going to bed,” Lance said. “You two should get some rest.”
After he was gone, Kyle took her hand. His knuckles were red and bruised. “You sure you’re all right?” he asked.
“I will be. He scared me. You scared me too. I thought you were going to kill him.”
“Seeing him with his hands on you made me lose my mind.”
She smiled. “My knight in shining armor?”
“Hardly.” He rose to his feet and brought her with him. “Let’s get you to bed.”
They walked down the hallway. Her room was on the left, just off the living room. His was further down the hall. They stopped in front of her door.
She didn’t want him to leave her.
“Goodnight,” she said. Don’t go.
“You all right to be alone tonight? Because I can stay with you. I’ll sleep on the floor.”
She looked up into his eyes. “Would you?”
“If you want me to, yes, of course I will.”
Dangerous. He was dangerous. But her need for his presence outweighed the risk.
“I’ll go brush my teeth,” he said. “That’ll give you a chance to change, then I’ll come join you.”
She nodded and went inside her room. Numbly, she brushed her teeth and put on a pair of flannel pajamas. Surely they couldn’t get into any trouble if she was wearing these.
When he returned, he’d changed into sweats and a t-shirt, and carried a stack of blankets and a pillow. She crawled into the king-sized bed and pulled the covers up to her chin.
“Are you still cold?” Kyle spread a blanket onto the floor next to the bed.
She nodded.
“You’ll be warm in a minute. Especially in those granny pajamas.”
“They’re not granny pajamas,” she said.
“You rock them.” He plopped onto the floor.
She rolled to her side to get a better view of him. His blue eyes looked up at her.
“How’s the floor?” she asked.
“Hard.”
“You should just come up here. This is a huge bed. There’s room for both of us.”
“You sure?”
“If you promise to keep to your side of the bed and not steal all the covers, then yes.”
He grinned. “Deal.”
She scooted to the other side of the bed. He slipped under the covers. This is what it’s like to have a man in my bed.
They lay there for a moment. From the street below, a siren interrupted the silence. She shuddered, remembering how they had to pull Kyle off the man.
“Are you still shivering?” he asked.
“Yes.”
“Come here,” he said. “I’ll warm you up.”
Her heart pounded. Kyle’s arms around her? Could she allow it? She closed her eyes and took in a deep breath before deciding.
Chapter Nine
Kyle
* * *
KYLE THOUGHT SHE’D say no to his offer. The minute it was out of his mouth he regretted saying it. For what seemed like minutes, he lay there holding his breath and waited for her rejection.
Instead, she moved closer. He put his arms around her and brought her to his chest. Her hair tickled his nose. She snuggled against him, like it was the most natural thing in the world. “Better?”
“Yes.”
He stroked her hair. “I’m sorry I scared you tonight. The thought of anyone hurting you made me temporarily insane.”
“If anyone tried to hurt you, I’d be the same way. That’s what friends do.”
He let that sink in for a moment. What did that mean? Friends? Yes, he would have done the same if it had been any of the other women in his life. But would rage have consumed him like it had tonight? Or was it just because of the way he felt about Lettie? I have to keep her safe.
“Have you ever talked so much to another person in your life?” she asked. “We never run out of things to say, have you noticed that?”
“I have, yeah. But I bet there’s a lot more to know,” he said. “I bet we could come up with some questions.”
“Okay. What did you ask Santa for when you were in third grade?”
“Same thing I asked for every year. A train set. I never got one. Christmases were lean around our house.”
“That makes me sad.”
“I’m making up for it now with fast cars.” He smoothed her hair away from his nose. “You?”
“Third grade? A baby doll. The kind that ate and drank and you had to change their diapers.”
“I gave you one of those a couple months ago,” he said.
She laughed. “Yes, and she’s way cuter than the baby wetsy or whatever her name was.”
“What was your favorite subject in school?”
“That’s easy. History.”
“I should’ve guessed that one. Math for me.”
“What was your major?”
“Business. Kind of boring when you think about it, but it served its purpose,” he said.
“I didn’t finish college. My dad cut me off when I changed majors from religion to environmental sciences.”
“Do you ever think about going back to finish your degree?”
“Not since Dakota. No time or money.”
“Would you, if you could?”
“Maybe. Probably not. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I don’t seem to have much ambition anymore. Since I lost the shop, I feel so deflated. I like being your nanny. Being with Dakota and Mollie every day gives me a better sense of purpose than I’ve had in a long time. After our year is done, I don’t know what I’ll do. Honestly, nothing sounds appealing.”
He knew what he wanted her to do. Stay with me and Mollie. Let us be your purpose.
“Why did you stop teaching yoga?” he asked.
“I couldn’t make it work with Dakota’s schedule. The only time slots they had were in the early mornings and evenings.” She played with the sleeve of his shirt. “I feel bad about myself. Compared to Maggie and Kara and Honor, I’m such a loser.”
“That’s not true. You ran a business. Sure, it didn’t work, but that doesn’t mean you can’t figure out something else to do. You’ve had Dakota all by yourself. Jeez, one night alone with Mollie and I was a mess. Seriously, I don’t know how you’ve done it alone.”
“Okay, next question.”
“If you could go anywhere in the world where would it be?” He breathed in the scent of her hair. God, she smelled so good. Focus on the questions before something happens below.
“Europe. All over, so don’t make me choose. Like the trip Kara and Brody took.”
His heart hurt as he realized how hard it must be for her. All her closest friends were having careers and trips and money dripping from trees and here she was without even the joy of teaching her yoga classes. He would change that. Dammit, he would. This woman would have everything she wanted.
“How about you?” she asked.
“I’d like to go to Europe. And maybe Africa and see an elephant. I love them.”
“Me too. When I was a kid we took a trip to the San Diego zoo, and the night before we got there, a baby elephant had died. They didn’t know what was wrong with him. The mother was out in the open that day and I could see how sad she was that she’d lost her baby. She was listless and wouldn’t eat. That broke my heart.”
“They have burial grounds where they visit their ancestors,” he said. “I always thought that was so cool.”
“They have a great sense of family.”
He chuckled. “No wonder we’re drawn to them.”
“Because we don’t have any?”
“Something like that.”
“Have you ever been in love?” she asked.
Sheri Swanson. With her green eyes and blond curls and a face like an angel, it would have been easy for her to be a mean girl. But she wasn’t. She was the only one in school who called him by his real name. His name was Daniel back then. Daniel, not Pig like everyone else. Her voice had been like a feat
her trailing his skin. She smelled of flowers and sunshine.
Pig.
“There was a girl. Sheri Swanson. When we were little, she was the only one who would sit with me on the bus. I loved her, but sadly it was unrequited.”
“She just thought of you as a friend?” Violet asked.
“It was more complicated than that.” The friend zone was something for normal people, not Pig. “She looked out for me, even though she was beautiful and rich. There was no reason she had to be nice, but she couldn’t stand cruelty to any living creature. She stood by her principles, which made her brave. Like you.”
Violet sighed against him.
“Her family was probably the wealthiest in town. They had this big white house with pillars and a wraparound porch.” He closed his eyes, seeing Sheri walk up the steps of her front porch—her pigtails and those shiny black shoes—the bows in her hair that matched the pink hydrangeas. “Their house, it was like this symbol to me of the American dream. The perfect house and family.”
“Do you know what happened to her?” Violet asked.
“Yeah, I know.” He swallowed, remembering their last conversation. I’m going somewhere no one can hurt me. “Turns out she didn’t have the perfect family. There was a reason she always wore long sleeves.”
Her breath caught. “Oh no.”
“I worked at the diner in town and she used to come see me almost every day. The ladies I worked for always let me give her a free soda. One day she came in, crying. I’d never seen her cry. I remember just standing there feeling helpless and small. When I asked her what was wrong, she lifted the long sleeves of her shirt all the way up to her shoulders. Cigarette burns on the inside of her upper arms. So many. New ones. And scars and scars of old ones.”
“Her dad?”
“Her mom.”
“No.”
“She told me she was going somewhere no one could hurt her. She’d come to say goodbye.”
“Did she run away?” Violet asked.
“She took a bottle of her mother’s sleeping pills and never woke up.”
“Oh no. That’s what she meant by a place no one could hurt her.”
He nodded, unable to speak.
“I’m sorry, Kyle.”
“It was a long time ago.”
“Is she one of the things you wanted to forget?” she asked.
“Yes. But I never could. When someone is kind to you and loves you for who you are under all the scars and dirt and poverty, you never forget them.”
“It makes you think, though, doesn’t it?” Violet asked. “What we assume about people’s lives.”
“Everything that glitters is not gold,” he said.
“There’s more to my family than people knew. Things no one would believe.” She grew still in his arms, her breath moving the hairs on his arm. “My dad’s an angry person. I’m not sure why. Nothing I did was ever good enough. He never hurt me physically or anything like that, but there were punishments inappropriate for the crimes.”
“Like what?” His stomach clenched. What had he done?
“His favorite was to deny me food for twenty-four hours. I had to stay in my room, stomach growling, as the scent of my mother’s Sunday dinner crept up the stairs.”
“Wow,” Kyle said.
“Any small failing riled him. A ‘B’ on my report card, smiling at a boy in church, spreading too much butter on my bread. I couldn’t go to any of the dances at school or join any clubs, regardless if I had good grades or not. Strangely, he wanted me to be a cheerleader. He insisted that I try out. If I hadn’t made the squad, I don’t know what would have happened.”
“That doesn’t make sense.”
“I know. That’s how he was. Irrational and manic. I was so anxious all through high school that my hair started falling out. When I left for college, I thought I might be free, but it was the same. After he cut me off, I went to work for Cole Lund’s church, hoping to make enough for tuition. But you know how that turned out.”
“Why did you come back to Cliffside Bay? Wouldn’t it have been better to stay away from them?”
“If you can believe it, I actually thought they’d want me to come home…that they’d want to be part of Dakota’s life. No matter what, I still wanted them to love me.”
He tightened his arms around her and kissed the top of her head. “It’s their loss.”
“This town was my home, not my family. I see that now.”
This town was my home. No wonder she didn’t want it to change. She needed some aspect of her life to be steady and loyal. I can be her home.
Could he? Was he strong enough to be her rock? Dakota’s dad?
He didn’t know the answers to those questions. All he knew was that everything in his world had changed the moment Mollie came into his life. She’d brought Violet and Dakota to him. She’d changed his heart.
With everything in him, he wanted to be the kind of father the other Dogs had, but what tools did he have? An image of his sister’s mangled body came to him, followed by the article in the local paper about Sheri. He hadn’t been able to shelter either of them from harm. How did he think he could do it now?
If she knew the truth about the accident would she be able to love him?
Violet’s breathing had changed. She was asleep. “Goodnight, my sweet Lettie.”
He stared at the ceiling, wide awake, ashamed of his earlier behavior, not for beating the crap out of that jerk but for scaring her. She deserved a nice night out with dancing and drinks, not an escort who acted like a lunatic. Furthermore, he shouldn’t have left her alone. He knew better.
For the first time in years, he prayed.
Please God, give me the strength to do right by this woman. Give me the courage to tell her everything.
When he finally fell asleep, he dreamt of Violet and Sheri hand-in-hand, pink bows in their hair. From the window of the bus, he watched as they walked up the stairs to Sheri’s front door. The door opened. A black cloud of smoke sucked them inside the house. He banged on the bus window, shouting for them. It was too late. They were gone. The bus pulled away.
Chapter Ten
Violet
* * *
A WEEK LATER, Violet sipped a mineral water in the parlor of a couture wedding dress shop in the city with Maggie and Kara beside her. Honor was currently inside the dressing room, with an attendant, trying on the first dress of the day.
“I’m so glad you could come with us,” Maggie said.
“Me too,” Violet said.
“Kyle’s a softie. Who knew?” Kara asked.
After learning that Violet had told Honor she had to work and therefore couldn’t go into the city to help find Honor a dress, Kyle had demanded she go with the rest of the girls to San Francisco. “The maid of honor has to go dress shopping. End of story.”
He’d even offered to take a day off and stay with the kids. Since the night they’d slept in the same bed together, life had gone on as usual, only Kyle seemed distant. Not avoiding her exactly, but more like something weighed heavy on his mind. Last night, he’d seemed antsy and agitated, like he wanted to tell her something but couldn’t quite get it out. He’d stopped and started a few times with vague references to events in his past he’d like to share with her. They’d been interrupted when Mel arrived early. Of course. She had impeccable timing.
“Hey, what’re you thinking about?” Maggie asked, pulling Violet from her musings.
“That I can’t wait to see what Honor picks out.” One little white lie never hurt anyone, right?
“Nothing like waiting until the last minute,” Kara said with a laugh. “She’s going to pay a fortune for rush alterations.”
“I told her not to order that short one,” Maggie said. “It had no romance to it.”
“So did I,” Kara said. “But she never listens.”
“I can hear you,” Honor called out from the dressing room. “This is why Violet’s my maid of honor and not one of you bitches.�
��
They all doubled over in a fit of giggles.
The original dress Honor had ordered online arrived two days ago. She’d called Violet in a panic. “It’s awful. Like the worst ever.” Apparently, the short skirt she’d thought she wanted turned out to be exactly opposite of what she imagined it would be. “I thought it would be all flirty and whimsical and great on my small frame, but it looks like a prom dress for a slutty chick.”
The ladies had quickly hatched a plan to go into the city. Kara insisted they go high end or they’d never find one that didn’t need a hundred alterations. Violet wasn’t so sure. From what she could tell this shop was filled with dresses covered in elaborate lace or layers of tulle. They wouldn’t be easy to alter.
The wedding was scheduled for three days before Christmas. Brody and Kara had offered their house. After convincing Zane to have it there rather than a church, Kara and Honor had jumped into arranging every detail. The guest list was small. Just the Dogs, Doc and Janet Mullen, Flora and Dax Hansen, plus Mary and Sophie.
“It’s official that Doc’s officiating,” Kara said. “He ordered his license over the internet.”
“Something about that seems wrong,” Maggie said.
“And yet so right,” Kara said.
“Was Brody touched that Honor asked him to walk her down the aisle?” Maggie asked Kara.
“There might have been tears, but I’m sworn to secrecy,” Kara said.
“Speaking of guys that cry.” Maggie rolled her eyes. “Jackson’s taking his best man role way too seriously. He’s been working on his speech for weeks.”
“That’s adorable,” Kara said.
“Not after the seventh or eighth time you’ve heard variations of the same speech,” Maggie said.
Kara went on to tell them she’d hired a group to decorate the house for the wedding. “Trey recommended them. They have every type of decoration you can imagine and just come in and do it all at once.” The interior designer, Trey Mattson was everywhere lately. He’d decorated Maggie and Jackson’s remodeled home and was currently working on Lance’s beach house on the Mullen property.
“Wait, that’s someone’s job?” Violet asked. “Just to decorate for the holidays?”
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