They separated, and Kyle kissed Garrett’s cheek before sitting back against the cushions. He looked relieved and careful, mirroring what was going on inside Chase’s head and in his heart. The day could still go to shit with one careless word.
Garrett thought about that for a few seconds, then reached for Chase’s hand again. “Maybe I don’t need to see it.” He took a slow, deep breath and then visibly relaxed. “What’s Bran doing out there?”
“Meeting a crew to get some work done on the house.”
“When he comes back, I still want to go up to the West Hills. If I’m going to be a glorified housepainter, I need shots of that work to get my next job.”
“You’ll wait and let us go with you?”
“Yeah.” Garrett turned toward Chase and waited until their eyes met. “Will you stay here while I go up with Bran?”
Kyle didn’t move but he spoke before Chase could tell Garrett no. “She broke up with him. He won’t be there, so it’ll be safe.”
“How do you know?”
Chase wanted to tell Kyle to stay the hell out of it, to stop trying to make it easy for Garrett to put himself in danger. In danger of what, he didn’t really know. But he didn’t say that, and he wouldn’t. Kyle was Garrett’s friend. It wouldn’t be right to muscle in on that. Besides, he wanted the answer to the question too.
“Because we were there, in court, for his sentencing,” Kyle said. He speared Chase with a sharp look and then turned back to Garrett. “We wanted to be there in case you showed up. In case you needed someone to stand in front of you. She said she tried to call but wasn’t able to reach you. She asked us to apologize for her.”
They let that sit for a moment. Chase turned to Garrett and added his free hand to theirs, rubbing gently. Garrett didn’t seem to need much emotional shoring up, not anymore, but Chase did. It hurt that Garrett didn’t want him to go. Almost as much as thinking about Garrett going back up there, being in that house again.
“Why?” Chase asked Garrett. He tried to keep the pain in his chest from riding out on his voice, and enjoyed marginal success. He was just glad he hadn’t said no.
Kyle stood and went over to the bar separating the kitchen and living room and started rifling through the massive stack of mail sitting on the end nearest the front door.
“I need to do this. Without leaning on you. If you’re there… it’ll feel like I’m hiding behind you.”
Chase watched Garrett’s fingers tighten around his own. They looked too clean, a sure sign Garrett hadn’t been working lately. If going back to the house would help, would let him relax and work again…. He had said he’d do anything and meant to honor that promise. Chase lifted his head and tried to smile. “Okay.”
Kyle came back and stood on the other side of the coffee table, the dark wood oval that had probably sat in the same place for over fifty years. He handed a legal-size envelope to Garrett. Chase relaxed when he saw it wasn’t from the courthouse, but only a little.
Garrett opened the envelope, let the letter drop to his lap, and stared at the check. “Holy shit. This is double what she agreed to. Even with the last additions.”
Kyle headed for the kitchen, shaking his head and grinning. Garrett leaned over and kissed Chase.
“You didn’t see anything else for me in there, did you?” Garrett held Chase’s eyes but turned his head enough to speak toward the kitchen. “Like an arrest warrant or a hospital bill?”
“Don’t worry about the bill.” Chase kissed Garrett’s lips and then nuzzled the spot behind his ear that made him hot.
Garrett sank back into the couch, his head falling back as he sighed. “That’s not going to make me forget…. Oh, that feels so good.”
A moment later Chase found himself pulled to his feet. He trailed behind Garrett, toward the bedroom. “Don’t you want the letter?”
“No.” He turned and molded his body against Chase and turned his face up, lips parted and begging to be kissed. “I want you.”
Before they continued into the bedroom, Garrett told Kyle dinner was on him tonight—“But no getting smashed again.”
Chapter Ten
GARRETT WASN’T at all sure he was up to going to Ms. Nelson’s house. Geri’s house. She asked me to use her first name, so it’s time to get over that aversion once and for all.
But fear won’t stop me.
He knew he would be safe—intellectually he knew neither Kyle nor Bran would let anyone assault him, probably wouldn’t even allow anyone to so much as give him a dirty look with impunity. Not that he expected anything like that to happen.
If she had really broken up with him.
If she hadn’t taken him back.
Big ifs.
They rode in Bran’s car without speaking. Even Kyle and Bran’s usual banter was absent and that made Garrett a little nervous. He almost asked why they were so quiet, more than once, but what came out when he finally spoke was, “Do you guys think something is going to happen up there?”
Kyle turned and looked him over before answering. “No. I called ahead to be sure. If you’d rather not go just say the word. We can turn around. No harm, no foul.”
“That’s not why I’m asking. You’re just really quiet.”
“Oh. Yeah, I guess so. I’m a little preoccupied today. It doesn’t have anything to do with this trip.”
“Is it about school? You have finals coming up, right?” Garrett had been avoiding thinking about what would happen when Kyle finished his massage therapy program, but it would happen whether he paid attention or not. A better friend would know Kyle’s schedule.
“Yes. I’m a little stressed.”
“Maybe someone needs to give you a massage to ease that tension.” Garrett found himself grinning. It felt damn good.
“Got it covered.” Bran shot a grin of his own over his shoulder.
“I bet you do.”
Kyle chuckled, softly, but Garrett heard a lot in that sound. Love and anticipation and a lot of things he didn’t have names for.
Garrett pulled his phone out and sent Chase a quick text: Almost there. Thx for understanding. Love, G.
The answer came fast: Love back.
He looked up in time to see the house. “Right there, with the Ducks wind sock.”
“Gotcha covered.” Bran sounded tense, or maybe that’s what he had sounded like going into a “situation” when he’d been a cop.
For a split second, Garrett considered turning around and leaving. The embarrassment that came with being a grown man who’d never held a job for more than a few weeks overtook the fear that he’d see the boyfriend again. But he realized he didn’t hold anyone else to that standard. Kyle, one of the kindest and smartest men he knew, was on his third career. Garrett thought about Andy the cop and his mysterious job offer, but by then Bran was pulling into the driveway. He stopped the car and looked at Garrett in the rearview mirror for a second, and then turned to face him. “We can still turn around.”
“Thanks. I mean it. Thanks for bringing me, for coming with me.”
“Not a problem. If we’re going….”
“Let’s get going.” Garrett felt a stirring of anxiety and fear but didn’t hesitate to open the door and get out of the car. It got easier to stand tall and head for the house after he pushed the car door closed and his hand wasn’t shaking. The smile he aimed at Kyle and Bran, meant to reassure them that he was okay, had a calming effect on him as well.
The door opened before he had a chance to knock, and Geri stepped onto the porch as Garrett reached it. She looked like she was working to keep from hugging him, and if that was right, he was glad. Geri Nelson was a pretty woman, and all he needed was to pop some wood in front of Kyle and Bran. He did like blondes but generally preferred women with more curves.
Stop thinking like this. It might be distracting, but it’s really not helping.
“Hi, Geri. Thanks for letting me come by and take a few pictures.”
“Of course. I’m so sorry, Garrett. I n
ever thought anything like that would happen. I shouldn’t have—”
“It’s not your fault.” He closed all but the last step of the distance between them and lightly touched her shoulder. He wanted to ask if her boyfriend had ever been violent toward her but was afraid it would sound like he thought she should have known, that it would imply the fault was hers somehow.
After an awkward moment, Garrett asked if she remembered Kyle and Bran, and Geri said yes as she invited them inside with a gesture. “I’m preparing for a case, so I’ll be in my office. Your things are here—” She opened the seat of the bench in the foyer, and inside was Garrett’s messenger bag. “Just give a shout if you need anything.”
He kept from grabbing the bag and lugging it through the house with him only with a great effort. Chase had given him the bag nine years ago last Christmas, and he’d been afraid someone might have gotten rid of it. He did grab his digital camera. It still had a little charge and took better pictures than his phone.
Kyle and Bran followed him upstairs silently, like two bodyguards. Garrett wasn’t interested in the texturing, but he did want pictures of the murals on the guest bedroom walls. Geri had nieces and nephews, and that was their room when they visited. If the project hadn’t been the second one Geri asked for, Garrett probably wouldn’t have continued painting in her house and—
Nope. Not productive thinking, G. Stop right there.
Garrett stood in front of the wall depicting a mountain scene for a moment before starting to photograph it—a slightly cartoonish version of Mount Hood in the background with eagles soaring above and deer and coyotes and a regal lynx living below the tree line. He already had pictures on the camera he held in his hands but wanted to take more just in case.
“My God,” Bran whispered. He sounded shocked, so Garrett whirled to face the doorway, expecting to see the boyfriend back for round two. Instead he saw Bran and Kyle staring openmouthed at the walls in the room.
Two walls were taken with the usual bed, dresser, and closet, but two were set aside for the murals. The only things in front of the mural walls were a few beanbag chairs covered in fabric that made them look like large rocks.
Garrett’s face heated, and he turned back to the murals. He had borrowed Chase’s surreal style for them and still felt a little embarrassed by that. Which didn’t exactly make sense, but there it was anyway. He hadn’t expected kids to appreciate his own style, which had been called sharp and violent by the handful of critics who had noticed him a few years ago.
He took a panorama photo of the whole Mount Hood wall and a couple of close-ups of the animals, and still neither Kyle nor Bran had spoken again. Garrett turned to find them inspecting the beach mural, Bran’s arm around Kyle’s waist and Kyle resting his arm across Bran’s shoulders.
“Do you need us to move?” Kyle asked. He smiled at Garrett and then rested his cheek against Bran’s head.
“No. Thanks.” He almost said he didn’t really need the pictures at all, that he was there because of a vague fear that if he never went back that meant he was too weak to face the place where he’d had his ass kicked. Garrett knew they would have come without him if he’d asked, to pick up the bag, but he was glad he’d done it himself. A few more minutes and he could leave with his head held high and never look back. Maybe I’ll talk to Chase about all that.
He started taking pictures, and Kyle and Bran backed away to give him room.
“This is amazing.” Bran still whispered, and when Garrett glanced over, his face was a little slack. “That sand castle, the dragon…. So cool.”
He looks and sounds like a little kid.
“Thanks.” He was proud of the murals but still found things he would change if he could. The designs on the buckets are cliché and the shovels and umbrella would look better if they popped from the background more. The seagulls look a little too sentient, the starfish in the tide pool not sentient enough.
“This is amazing. I almost feel like I could step onto the sand and run into the water. The kids who live here must love this room.”
“The room is for Geri’s nieces and nephews when they visit.” For some reason he couldn’t pinpoint, that fact made Garrett sad. When they left the room and went back downstairs, he thought he wasn’t the only one.
Geri met them in the foyer. “Thank you, Garrett. The murals are lovely. If you’re ever interested in doing the Greek mural in the dining room I would love it. We could renegotiate your fee.”
“Thanks, Geri. I think I’ll be taking a break from walls and going back to paper and canvas for a while. Thanks for keeping this for me.” Garrett hefted his messenger bag and slung it over his shoulder.
They left, and Garrett held the bag on his lap while he texted Chase: Done. Thx. <3
He and Chase had a short conversation via text, and Garrett realized the car had been silent the whole time. “Is everything okay?”
No answer came for so long Garrett started to worry. It was a nameless, faceless worry, but no less upsetting for being unfocused.
Kyle turned and smiled. “Everything is great. Did you get what you needed?”
Garrett nodded.
“We’re just thinking about those murals. They’re… I’m speechless. They’re not your usual style, I know that, but….”
“Thanks.”
“Did you mean that, about going back to work on canvas?”
“Yeah. That check means I can pay my way for a while and still have some left over for supplies.”
Kyle looked uncomfortable but didn’t say anything. Garrett silently thanked whatever was keeping Kyle from speaking. I went too far.
Before he could say anything else that would make his friends uncomfortable, Garrett changed the subject. “When are your finals?”
“Only a couple of weeks left now.”
“When you get your certificate, will you be moving out to the coast?” The question had felt casual before he’d flung it out into the car. As soon as he heard it, his gut clenched. He’d miss Kyle, and Bran too, but it would be harder for him to take time to work on his own art if only he and Chase lived at the condo.
“That’s the plan. I’ll miss you guys, but now you’ll have two places to stay at the coast.”
Garrett laughed a little, and it sounded nervous.
“Really. It’s a three-bedroom house.”
“You aren’t going to fill the other bedrooms with kids?”
All three laughed at that, but Garrett wasn’t quite sure why. He’d been partially serious. Kyle and Bran would make great parents, but maybe they thought they were too old or had other plans for how to spend their time.
Kyle reached over and squeezed Bran’s shoulder. “I was thinking we could adopt a dog. I’ve never had a dog.”
“Never?” Bran sounded like he thought that was impossible, that everyone had had a dog at one time in their lives. “Even when you were a kid?”
“I thought about getting one when I was in tech but spent so much time working it wouldn’t have been fair to the dog.” Kyle twisted on the seat to face Bran. “Can you see my dad with a dog? I would have had to walk around behind him with a shovel—trained the dog to go on the shovel.”
They laughed, and Garrett pretended to be absorbed in his phone. He did reread Chase’s last text that said he was heading out to the Thai food cart and would see them when they got back, but mostly he wanted to stop thinking about Kyle’s dad.
Mr. Shimoda made Garrett think about the parents’ party and the fight he and Chase had had on the drive home. He probably shouldn’t have been driving at all, but Chase was a horrible driver, so he had. It was a miracle he wasn’t pulled over, driving seventy-five and passing cars at every opportunity while they fought at full volume. Over their parents.
Really, over how horribly my mother was acting at the party. Hanging all over Chase’s dad. It was mortifying.
Of all the stupid things to fight about.
It hadn’t helped that they’d seen Mr. Shim
oda and Bran’s mother kissing before Garrett’s mother latched on to Chase’s father and ruined the whole day. The whole weekend. Maybe the whole month, which was how long Garrett had stayed gone after their two-hour-long argument in the car.
By the time Bran stopped the car in the parking garage beneath the condo, Garrett had wound up thinking about that argument. He was so tense he couldn’t enjoy the beef pad kee mao, and couldn’t bring himself to talk to Chase about why he’d had to go to Geri’s without him.
Chapter Eleven
CHASE WASN’T thrilled about helping Kyle and Bran move out to Lincoln City but wasn’t about to flake again. His hesitation was mostly due to how much he would miss sharing the condo with them, with only a slight aversion to lifting and carrying thrown in. Kyle had a surprising amount of stuff considering he’d been living in one room in the condo for a couple of years. Chase tried not to seem outwardly depressed about the whole deal—for Garrett’s sake is what I’m telling myself—without much luck. They could have waited upstairs for Bran to return with the truck, but Garrett had wanted to go down, so they did.
Garrett might have looked disappointed when Bran pulled up in the U-Haul. Bran opened the door to the parking garage and then rolled down the window and beckoned them over.
“I’m pulling in. Kyle still has my car, so both spaces are empty. It’ll probably be easier to load up from there.” Bran sounded as happy as he looked. And why wouldn’t he? His husband was moving into their house.
“Where is Kyle?” Chase knew he was stalling, and judging from Bran’s frown, he knew it too.
“His father wanted to give him some things. Shouldn’t be much longer.” Bran looked from Chase to Garrett and then back. “Everything okay here?”
“Yeah—” Before Chase could get anything more out, Jess appeared on the other side of the truck, smiling in through the window behind Bran. She waved, and Bran turned to face her. Chase was surprised to see her but at the same time wondered why he would be. When Jess came around the back of the truck, Chase told Bran, “We’ll see you upstairs in a minute.”
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