by Barb Shuler
“Deep breaths,” he reminded me. I nodded as we started forward.
I'd chosen to go barefooted because my dress was long and I wasn't one for heels. Why intentionally try to make myself bust my ass in front of everyone? When we got to the altar I grinned at Jackson. Gabe kissed my head again and took Ryan from Jackson. She wasn't happy at first, but her Gramps was a good substitute it seemed.
The next few minutes passed in a blur. My heart raced the entire time. I met Jackson's gaze as we exchanged vows. Tears were slowly sliding from the corner of my eyes. When the preacher pronounced us husband and wife, I melted where I stood. Jacks moved closer and at the words “you may kiss the bride” he dipped me and my entire body went to jello. His kiss was hot and hard. If all of these people weren't here… I swear….
“Now, the new journey begins,” Jacks said as he kissed my nose. I sighed and grinned.
“Yep, and at least you already know nothing will ever be the same. We have the house, the kids and now, each other,” I stretched up on my tiptoes and kissed him again. Soon we were surrounded by family and friends. I may not have had any ‘family’ here but they'd all taken me in as theirs, and for that I was grateful. Ever so grateful. I belonged with this man, my heart and soul knew it.
After we ate it was time for our first dance as husband and wife. John Michael Montgomery “Life's a Dance” came on and as he and I moved with the music I knew it was time. I bit my lip and giggled when he dipped me at the end of the song.
“I love you, Jackson Landry. You've made me and the kids so happy. I know when it's time for our baby to be here, he or she will be just as happy,” I grinned as a tear slipped from my eye. It seemed to take him forever to catch the meaning of what I said. When it clicked he lifted me up, whooping as we spun in a circle.
“Oh, God baby, are you sure?”He asked, standing behind me, with his hands on my belly. I nodded and laid my hands over his.
“I'm sure,” I said, softly.
“You're okay with this?” he asked. I nodded. I knew why he was asking. It had taken a bit to get out of the mind frame I’d lived with for so long. I still had bad days, but this little life was a miracle I wanted. A piece of me and a piece of Jackson. A piece of us. The first of many firsts for us.
It was the next step in the start to our forever. A forever I knew would be full of surprises and new adventures for us all. As we stood and watched the crowd dance there was a loud siren sound. I saw a few heads pop up. Phones came out and men and woman were standing quickly.
Jackson kissed my cheek and whispered, as if he didn’t see what was going on around us. “I can’t wait to get you out of this dress, Mrs. Landry.
“We got a fire boys and girls!” I heard someone yell out and people really started moving.
“Shit, I’m sorry, baby,” I frowned as Jacks squeezed my hand and pulled me back to him. “I'll be back soon.”
“For fuck sake,” Gabe muttered. I looked around.
“I love you, Mrs. Landry.”
“I love you, too, Mr. Landry,” I said. His kissing my nose pulled a small smile from me. I knew he had to go, it was his job…. but I didn’t have to like it, or pretend I wasn’t gonna worry myself to death until he was back and I could see for myself that he was okay.
“I expect you to be in bed and naked when I return!” He swatted my ass after we kissed again and he was off, running to his truck with Drew, Charlie and another fella on his heels.
I would be waiting for him, alright. But for now, I had a now screaming toddler to deal with. Her daddy was leaving her and she was not happy about it. I scooped her up and gave the boys a wave as they sped down the drive.
I kissed Ryan’s tear stained cheeks and said a silent prayer that they all returned to us, safe and sound. This was my life now and no matter what we would take each day by the short hairs and make it the best we could. Interruptions and all.
SHATTER ME WHOLE ~ PLAYLIST
A Different World - Bucky Covington
Before Your Love - Kelly Clarkson
Born Country - Alabama
Broken - Lindsay Haun
Come As You Are - Nirvana
Daughtry - Superman
Going Under - Evanescence
Holdin Out for A Hero - Ella Mae Bowen
Hysteria - Muse
I'm not a girl, Not yet a Woman - Britney Spears
Kick the Dust Up - Luke Bryan
Kryptonite - 3 Doors Down
Last Dollar (Fly Away) - Tim McGraw
Lithium - Nirvana
Lose Control - Evanescence
Love like That - Blaire Hanks
Made of Glass - Trapt
Make Me Wanna - Thomas Rhett
Nothin' like the First Time - Lady Antebellum
One Last Breath - Creed
Pain - Three Days Grace
Paranoid - Black Sabbath
Piece by Piece - Kelly Clarkson
Roundtable Rival - Lindsey Stirling
Scars - iPrevail
Shatter Me - Lindsey Stirling
Still Frame - Trapt
Stronger (What Doesn't kill You) - Kelly Clarkson
Taking Over Me - Evanescence
Tears of Yesterday - Hoobastank
The Chance - Julie Roberts
The Phoenix - Fall Out Boy
These Four Walls - Sara Evans
Thunder Rolls - Garth Brooks
Wagon Wheel - Darius Rucker
Wasted - Carrie Underwood
Who I am - Jessica Andrews
Sparks of Deception (Book 4)
SNEAK PEEK
Prologue
A lot can happen in life but until you live through it, you don’t fully understand the consequences of your actions. Yes, actions have consequences. Who knew, right? Those can be either great or small, some can even be dire. It all depends on you and the way you carry yourself in life up to that point.
Growing up in a small town you’d think that would save you some of the real world drama. Small towns are supposed to be safe, quiet places to raise families. Kids can be out in the street and not have to worry about getting snatched, or killed by gang bangers. Or your common drug dealing assholes. You know the kind. My town should have been that way, but it wasn’t. I should have had a loving family, but I didn’t. I grew up in a home that sucked. Like seriously sucked monkey balls. My Gran was a mean old bitch, who if you did something wrong she whacked you with the bible while shouting “Jesus will save your rotten soul”. Maybe it was just me she did that too. So, yeah, fun times, man. Not.
Let’s not mention the drug using, dealing and alcohol consuming parents of mine. I have no idea where my biological dad is. The one that was supposedly my father was always out partying and selling my mom off to the highest bidder. Saddest thing of all… she let him. She had no respect for herself at all. None. The few times in my life that I can remember her being ‘sober’ she treated me as bad as Gran, if not worse. It’s as if it was all my fault. She got drunk or high, had a child and all but abandoned me, yet it was all my fault. I was left to fend off Gran as a kid. I had to believe life could be different.
My life changed though when I was chased down - and I mean that literally - by Deputy Drew Landry. One of Burke’s Deputy finest had come to get my help on on a case. I put my computer knowledge to work. In the long run that day changed my life for the better. It’s also managed to put me in danger a few times, but you know it’s experiences like those that teach you what is real in your life. It’s the difference in what matters and what doesn’t. The who and why of it all, if you will. One day I was hungry and scared to sleep, ‘cause, lets face it, you never knew what Gran was gonna do next if she was having a bad day. My so called parents were seldom around cause they were always drunk or high off their asses. What role models I had. I wonder if I could get away with whacking people over the head with a bible? Might could be some fun. Ya know? Until they died. Sad thing is.. I don’t miss them, I don’t miss that part of my life. I have gro
wn and moved on from it all.
Life has many roads and paths to follow and I am grateful mine has lead me to a place where I’m not only safe, but protected (not that I need that now) and loved. I have a family - though they do not share my blood - that loves me for me. I have parents that give a shit about me. And siblings that I love with all of my heart. Tyler and Elijah will always have a big brother to watch out for them, and kick ass for them when it’s needed.
I have two best friends that are the best. We’re thicker than thieves in the bank vault after dark. Alana “Lana” and Carter are all I had for a while, now that I can share them, and grow with them in a positive light, things have gotten so much better for us all. Lana, Carter and I have had our fair share of troubles over the last couple of years. A lot of that stems from years of not being confident in asking for help. Not being able to feel comfortable standing on our own two feet to say, “fuck you’ to the assholes bothering us. That has changed for the most part. It won’t let us revert back to those kids. I’m in the mind set to knock you on your ass, then ask what the problem is. This is why we get into a lot of trouble now.
The fact that I happen to have fallen in love with my best friend doesn’t hurt. Wait, I don’t mean Carter. Let’s just clarify that. Not that it would be wrong but, no, definitely not Carter. Though I do love him - just not in the “I want to kiss him stupid” kind of way. I mean Lana. My beautiful blonde haired butterfly who literally holds the key to my heart. She owns it and I will always do anything and everything in my power to keep her safe. That has no boundaries. I will not sleep until I know she is safely home and tucked into bed. She isn’t eighteen yet, so there are limits to what is respectful for us to do in public and private. Not that I would ever disrespect her in that way, but a guy can hope that one special day will come. And it will because she is my one. The one. The moment she decides it’s right. Until then I am her best friend, her boyfriend and her protector.
There is a new threat on the horizon, one none of us saw coming but I can guarantee you this, I will not rest until I uncover all the dirty little secrets this town holds. One by one I will peel them back and display them for all to see. The longer it takes me to find her, the longer this search will go on.
No one is safe until I have the woman I love back in my arms.
Hell isn’t big enough to hide in. I will find her. I will find the man that took her and I will have justice. My kind of justice.
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**The above sneak peek is unedited and may not reflect the final copy.**
About the Author
I’m a Carolina Girl by right and a Texan by birth... so I have a Texas sized temper. Living and working in both states I’ve learned a lot about hard work, adapting to your surroundings and making the best of the path that you have been led down. My grandma Dollie once told me I would know what I was meant to do when it happened. She was right, as always.
As with most book lovers, I am an avid reader. Reading as always been a hobby - a passion, really. Reading helps to expand the perimeters of one's mind. That is what got me to writing as a kid. If I had paper...or a wall... I was writing. Words are a part of us all. Why not use them, right?
During the day I work as a ‘desk jockey’ and help the residents of my county navigate themselves around our little, but not too little country town. By night I am either blogging, doing PA work for some of my favorite authors or I am fighting with the voices in my head. (They can be stubborn at times.) It’s a way to cope and make the troubles of the day disappear, only if for a few hours. It’s a blessing and I am cherishing every moment. For what is my creation, can become someone else's treasure.
Tomorrow is never guaranteed so I want to make sure I live the day as fully as possible.
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