“What?” I blinked up at him through watery eyes.
“Tell me truly, my dove, for I shall only ask you this once. Do you wish to marry me? If you’re only going to say the vows so that you will have a home, let me assure you that I never would leave you out in the cold. I can arrange a place for you. You’ll have to learn to work to earn your keep, but marriage isn’t something you should enter into because you feel forced to do so.”
If it wouldn’t have been so unladylike, I would have gaped at him. Antony may not have been of noble blood, but I didn’t think I’d ever met a more chivalrous man. It was that, combined with how safe I felt in the shelter of his arms, that allowed me to confess. “I’m afraid of marriage.”
“Afraid? Whatever should you have to fear, Cecily?”
“I… I lied to you, before.” Knowing that I’d just been punished for that very thing, I swallowed hard before I continued. “My marriage to the duke… it was not what I said. He… he did not much care for me, I think.”
“I find that hard to believe,” he murmured, his mouth soft against my ear and his words softer still.
“No, I fear it’s quite true. I caught him in bed with a maid, and he humiliated me for it. He reveled in my humiliation, in fact.”
“Oh, my poor, poor little dove,” Antony cooed, his arms going tighter around me. “You have had to endure so much.”
“For that reason,” I continued, keeping my voice as strong as I could manage despite the tears that threatened, “I can’t say I relish the prospect of being a wife once more.”
“I see.” He began to stroke my hair and, like a cat, I tilted my head back to allow him access. “I can’t promise you that you will always enjoy being my wife, my lady. There is the matter of discipline, which I insist upon, as you know. And you will have to work hard, I won’t deny it. But I will always strive to make you happy, if I can.”
It would have to be enough. I knew that, in every fiber of my being: what Antony offered would have to be enough for me. Besides which, he truly was the kindest man I’d ever met. I honestly believed that other than a hot backside, he would never hurt me. In the end, wasn’t a smacked bottom better than a bruised heart?
“Yes, my lord.” It was the first time I’d ever said such a thing, and I could feel Antony’s smile even if I didn’t look up to see it. “I shall be your wife.”
Chapter Six
The farmer’s wife had sent us off with saddlebags full of bread, apples, a side of meat, and even a small jug of ale. From the moment she looked at me, I was sure that she’d heard my wailing as Antony had spanked me, and I couldn’t bear to look her in the eye.
Antony had thanked her and pressed a few coins into her hand as payment before helping me into the saddle. “Are you feeling well?”
I considered the question. My arse throbbed horridly, and I sensed that it would only grow worse after long hours in the saddle. Yet, despite that, my heart felt lighter than it had in days. I’d cried until my eyes were red and my throat was raw, but somehow I found myself smiling shyly at Antony when I woke in the morning. “Yes, thank you.”
“Good.” He gave my waist a squeeze before he released his hold on me. “We won’t be riding too hard today considering your… ah… condition.”
I blushed to hear him mention my spanked bottom and was thankful that the farmer’s wife had already departed and wasn’t there to witness my flushed cheeks. “Thank you.”
“I thought we’d stay at an inn tonight. Would you like that?”
The prospect of an actual bed and a fire, perhaps even a bath, was too wonderful for words, though I was sure my beaming smile was sufficient a message of gratitude.
“Then, after we break our fast, we will ride for my farm. We should be there before dinner time.”
I watched as Antony mounted his animal. He had such a fluid, easy grace. How had I never noticed it before? He straddled the animal with confidence—the same way he did everything. My eyes took in his long legs and traveled upward, to the hard thighs I’d been bent over to take my punishment the night before. I caught myself wondering what he would look like out of his jerkin and trousers. No sooner than the question crossed my mind, Antony looked back at me and I dropped my eyes, feeling my face flame with heat as though he could read my thoughts.
I shouldn’t be thinking of him in such a manner! Yes, soon he would be my husband, but even so, it was indecent! I’d certainly never thought of Wallace in that way, even after we’d bedded many a time. My shame was only heightened when I recalled that the nobility had always talked—behind closed doors, of course—of the peasants’ wantonness. Surely that was why they had so many children—more than they could ever hope to feed! Was that what was happening to me? Was spending time with Antony and coming to have feelings for him changing me?
“Are you ready to ride, my lady?”
His husky voice broke me out of my thoughts and I found myself smiling even before I’d begun to nod my assent. If Antony was changing me, I decided, it was only for the better.
* * *
Though we stopped riding long before we normally did, by the time we reached the inn my backside felt like it had been lit on fire. I was grateful when Antony came to lift me out of the saddle. “Do you think a bath might be possible?” I ventured as we walked inside.
“Tonight, you shall have anything that is within my power to give, sweeting.”
His words warmed me and I was smiling by the time we approached the innkeeper. “I require a room for the evening,” he told the wizened man. “And perhaps you might tell me where I can find a priest?”
His eyes darted back and forth between the two of us, seeming to read my flushed cheeks and Antony’s smile in but a moment. “Ye’ll be wanting to speak to Bishop Williams, then.” He gave us directions, chuckling as Antony took my hand and guided me from the inn.
“Let’s walk,” he suggested once we’d gotten outside. “It’s close by, and it will give the horses a rest.”
I nodded my assent. I couldn’t imagine how walking could be any worse than riding. Though Antony seemed content to walk alongside me without a word, I found my nerves mounting with every step we took. A marriage contract was nothing to enter into lightly, but somehow knowing that I had feelings for him made it almost more difficult. It was true that I had few options available to me, but the more my heart warmed toward him, the more I worried. Inevitably, he would tire of me, and what happened when the sweet words and kind smiles were nothing but a distant memory? This time, my heart would truly bleed, for I would have already given it to him.
Yet, I found that I could not say any of these things. When the time came, I did as I’d vowed to and stood beside him, saying “I do” in a voice that was clear and rang through the room like a bell. The smile Antony gave me as he squeezed my hand made my heart flutter with hope.
It was done in minutes, finished with a prayer led by the bishop, and then we were once more on our way back to the inn. It had taken no time at all, certainly not the amount of time that should be required to commit yourself to one person for the rest of your life. Antony was so cheerful he practically strutted, the veil of silence seeming to have lifted now that the deed was done.
“A hot meal will do us both good,” he commented as we made our way back to the inn. “I would love a good piece of fish, but it will probably be stew.” I could feel his eyes on me but couldn’t bring myself to reply. “Come, now.” He bumped me playfully with his shoulder. “It’s your turn to guess.”
“I don’t know. Mutton, perhaps.”
“I can see you’re not in the spirit of the game.” His eyes shone at me, filled to the brim with a happy light. “Are you alright?”
“Yes.” I made myself smile for his benefit. “I’m fine.” Truth be told, I was fine—it was only that I was consumed with thoughts that had nothing at all to do with food. In fact, for the first time in a fortnight I felt like I wouldn’t be able to eat a bite. The only thing I could think of was the wedding night. I
hadn’t very much enjoyed performing the duties of a wife, but I knew that it must be done.
Antony and I were greeted by the innkeeper with hearty congratulations and the news that a small cake had been prepared in our honor. The man pinched my cheek and laughed as I blushed. Antony was full of smiles and kind words for every person that stopped us to offer congratulations.
When Wallace and I had married, we’d had a wedding feast, as was the custom. The meal that Antony and I shared together could hardly be called such, and yet, it was a warm, enjoyable affair. All the patrons of the inn gathered around us and filled the evening with lively conversation and innocent jests that, after a time, made me forget my fear. It was not long before the cake was served, which Antony cut into small pieces so that everyone present could sample some.
I watched my new husband with awe. He was among his people now, and it was clear to see that he was a true leader. He could make them laugh, and he listened with rapt attention each time anyone spoke and genuinely seemed to care about each and every one. Long before the meal was over, I found myself feeling a certain sense of pride concerning Antony.
After the cake had been eaten, my cup was filled with wine and I was urged to drink. It went straight to my head, which seemed to be the point as the guests present laughed at my flushed face. I joined in the laughter, happy to be a part of the merriment. One man began to play a fiddle and another had a flute. Before long, the room was full of dancing and Antony was quick to pull me to the center of the room and spin me around until I was dizzy with the dancing and drink.
“Oh ho!” he exclaimed, cradling me in his arms when I swooned. “Not too light on your feet tonight, my dove?”
“It’s your fault,” I accused, my words slurring slightly. “You only wanted a reason to catch me.”
He leaned forward until our lips were nearly touching. “Guilty as charged,” he murmured, moments before his mouth met mine. In another life, I would have been horrified to cause such a scandal. Yet, in this moment, with this man, I knew no shame. I kissed him back with all the passion I felt, hardly hearing the hoots of laughter and encouragement that surrounded us.
When we pulled apart, Antony’s eyes sparkled brighter than before. “I think it’s time we were to bed, wife.”
“As you wish, my husband.”
Antony thanked the people who had dined with us, waving off their invitation to see us to bed. Then, with an arm protectively around my waist, he led me to our room. “I got you a gown,” he surprised me by saying.
“You did? When?”
“You recall I bought a replacement harness for your mare? I picked up a few supplies while I was there.”
“How thoughtful,” I remarked, pleased that he’d thought of me. When he showed me the gown, nothing more than a plain cotton garment with only a strip of lace for decoration, I thought it the prettiest thing I’d ever seen, simply for the thought he’d put into it. I began to unbutton my dress but quickly found that my fingers were slippery and useless.
“Here, let me,” he suggested huskily as he stepped behind me.
“I normally have someone to help me,” I admitted.
“Now you have me to help you. There is no shame in asking your husband for help. That is why I am here.”
True to his word, Antony unbuttoned me from top to bottom and helped me step out of the gown without complaint. Wallace had much preferred to rip the fabric from my body. Though I tried to push thoughts of my first husband out of my mind, today of all days it was hard not to compare them.
Antony said nothing as he helped me from my chemise and then slid the nightgown over my head. Only when it was in place did he smile and lean forward to kiss my lips. “You look beautiful, my dove. I knew it would suit you.”
“Thank you.” I dipped my head, humbled by his gesture and the compliment.
“You must be exhausted, sweeting. Let’s put you to bed.”
It was not until he’d tucked me into the soft bed—which felt remarkably better than the hard ground, particularly where my sore arse was concerned—that I realized that he truly did intend to sleep. I waited for him to say or do anything that would show another intention, but when he slid underneath the blankets alongside me I realized that he was not planning on bedding me. To my surprise, I found myself feeling disappointed. Did he not want me? How could that be possible? Surely he’d only married me so that he could lie with me as a husband would.
“Are you unwell, my dove?” Antony asked as I shifted in bed for the tenth time. “Can you not sleep?”
I wasn’t sure that I was going to say anything, but when I opened my mouth to reply, I found the words tumbling out. “I thought you would wish to consummate our union.”
“I see. I thought given your… condition, and the long ride today… I assumed you’d rather not.”
“Our marriage is not valid before the eyes of God until we lie together as man and wife.”
“Is that what worries you, Cecily? I told you that I would honor you and protect you as a husband should. I will keep that vow regardless of whether or not we consummate our union this night.”
“You don’t want me then,” I said flatly.
The bed shifted as he sat up. “Is that what you think, wife? Don’t let such falsehoods sully your lips again, or I am afraid I will have to clean them with soap.”
The threat made me shiver in a way that I found strangely erotic. “You are the one who is talking of sleep,” I pointed out.
“Yes, I wanted to have a care for your condition. Forgive me, next time I shall simply pull your gown up and have my way with you.”
“Indeed,” I rejoined, catching his teasing tone. “Do you intend to marry me a second time?”
With a sound somewhere between a growl and a primal yell, Antony lunged for me. In mere moments his mouth seized me and I knew at once that this kiss would be quite different from the other. It was a hard, possessive kiss that stole my breath and left my heart fluttering madly. When Antony pulled away, I could see his face in the light of the candle by the bedside and he looked decidedly unrepentant.
“Wait here,” he commanded, his voice throaty. “I have something that will teach you to mind your tongue.”
I smiled in the darkness, my heart feeling lighter still as he climbed from the bed and padded across the room. I did not know what he was in search of, but it did not matter. The only thing that mattered was the way he looked at me, the way he kissed me—as though he would never get enough of the sight of me, the feel of me. I’d never been loved like that.
“Did you miss me?” he asked upon his return.
“The loneliness was horrid,” I said with a breathy little giggle that made him lean down and kiss me once more. When he sat back up, I saw that he held a black strap in his hand. The sight of it made me gasp. “Husband?”
“Don’t worry, my dove,” he crooned, caressing the side of my face. “You aren’t being chastised tonight. Well, only lightly, at any rate.”
“What is it for?” I asked, awed at the sight of it in the candlelight. It looked so hard and inflexible, yet somehow pretty as the light shone off the leather.
“You shall see, my lady. Indeed you shall.” With that, he slowly began to lift the hem of my gown. He kept moving it higher until every inch of me, even my breasts, was bared.
My breath hitched in my throat as I waited, my eyes wide with expectation. I flinched when I saw him raise the strap, but I needn’t have bothered. When it flicked my breast it was as light and gentle as a caress.
“Do you like that?”
I could not find my tongue, even if it wouldn’t have been indecent to answer. When he brought it down again, the contact was only the slightest bit harder. To my surprise, the nipple he’d struck became a hardened bud of desire. I writhed in shame to see it, but he only chuckled. The next slap came down on my other breast, and I found myself arching my back and mewling.
With each flick of his wrist he showed my breasts attention—the
stinging, teasing kind that somehow led to a moisture developing between my thighs.
“I think you do like it, lady wife.” His smile was wolfish and so handsome that I squirmed on the bed beneath his eyes, wanting things I didn’t even know how to voice.
“Please.”
“Please what, sweeting? Do you want me to spank your naughty quim next?”
I gasped to hear him say such a thing, at the way his eyes crinkled with pleasure when he said it, and the deliciously naughty way it made me feel. “Antony…”
“I love it when you say my name, Cecily.” He bent down and kissed my lips, gently teasing my bottom lip with his teeth. “Pray say it again.”
“Antony.” The moment the word was out of my mouth, he flicked his wrist and the strap landed with a soft thud on my sex. The feelings it sent coursing throughout my body, so ripe with need, made me shudder.
“Again, my sweet.”
“Antony.”
Down came the strap, its touch feather-light, yet with just enough force to make it sting the tiniest bit. The lady I was raised to be was horrified at how much I enjoyed it. She was further shocked when I spread my legs invitingly. “Antony,” I repeated, just to feel the leather make my whole body tingle once more.
On and on we played our game until his name was nothing more than a moan on my lips. When he finally set the strap down, I was flushed from my hairline down to the very tips of my toes and his breathing was nearly as ragged as my own. I watched in fascination as his hands went to his trousers. When he pulled them down, my eyes were drawn to his member as it sprang out eagerly, long and hard.
“Are you certain, my lady?” he asked in a throaty murmur.
One look at him, at his handsome face and shining eyes, and I knew I could not deny him anything. “I am certain.”
When he entered me, I found that it hurt not at all. I’d been tensing for it, but all I felt was unfettered pleasure at being made one with him. With him inside me, somehow I felt as though I’d been made whole. When he began to move, thrusting slowly in and out, I gave myself to him with abandon, vaguely aware that I had found something I hadn’t even known I’d been missing.
The Conquered Brides Collection Page 55
