“You.” Cross understood now why the man felt familiar to him.
“Me,” Gabriel agreed.
“You’re my father.” Cross didn’t need him to confirm it. He understood that much. He could feel it.
“Guilty. I always preferred to call it a biological contribution.”
“You bred her like an animal. You used her as a means to an end. You threatened her family if she didn’t agree. And after we were born you threatened her with our safety if she didn’t play nice.” Cross got all that in one huge mental info-dump from Gabriel.
“And when we didn’t need her anymore, she took matters into her own hands. I found her hanging in her quarters a few months after you and Kale were taken away.”
Cross was grateful for the comforting numbness that wrapped around him. He understood that was Gabriel’s doing as well. Whatever he had done to keep his mind from tearing itself apart, also kept him from feeling the outrage, the injustice, the anger he knew he should. It was as if he was learning about a fascinating story instead of his own life. A life that had been taken and then hidden from him for the last ten years.
“The images I had.” Cross said.
“Memories.” Gabriel confirmed. “When you were fourteen you decided you had enough of us. Or as you put it –”
“I was tired of being a lab rat.” Cross could remember the words but it was as if they belonged to someone else.
“Yes. You wanted out. You convinced Kale that you could both just leave. You didn’t care what the cost of your freedom was, you were going to leave. You have to understand Cross, we thought you had no abilities. Kale had inherited his mother’s pushing abilities and believe me when I tell you he was not afraid to use them. He also was a mildly gifted psychic. We had no idea you had been holding out on us.”
“What abilities? I’m psychic to some degree, but nothing more than that. Lately not even that, just ask Coben.” Cross wished he could see Coben’s face to see if he got the jab.
“There was that one incident with the kid in police custody,” Coben said.
Cross struggled for a memory and then it hit him. “That was one time. It never happened again. The department cleared me.”
“You nearly incinerated the station. You have no idea the red tape I had to go through to explain what happened. We almost brought you in then, but Finn convinced us to wait and continue to watch you.”
“Finn?” Cross’s attention shifted to where he knew his partner still sat next to his bed.
“And this is where this gets a little tricky,” Gabriel said.
“Yeah, like it’s all been fairly straightforward so far.”
Gabriel ignore him and continued. “We discovered what you could do only when you used those abilities to try and escape.”
“What exactly am I supposed to be able to do?” Cross asked.
“You have the ability to manipulate energy.”
Cross snorted. “Come again?”
“You are able to gather up ambient energy and using your own body as a conduit, use that energy in any number of ways.”
Memories slammed into his mind, shadowy images of melted metal, heat and heady power. The same images he had before collapsing in Coben’s office. “We tried to get out.” He wasn’t talking to Gabriel. He was trying to sort it all out in his own head.
“You did.” Gabriel agreed.
Cross wiped beads of sweat that had popped up on his brow away from his eyes. “I did that to them. I killed them?” He didn’t want to believe that he was capable of such an act, but he needed to know.
“Yes,” Gabriel said. His voice sounded calm, so matter of fact. How could he sound so calm? Cross remembered something else. “It was you, wasn’t it? You were the one who shot me.”
“You surprised us. We had no idea that you and Kale were synergistic. When linked together the power the two of you wielded was staggering. Over a dozen agents died trying to stop you. Some of them so badly burned by the energy you killed them with, they had to be identified with dental records. They were good men and women simply doing their job and you killed them with no thought or remorse. They were in your way and you thought you had the right. I confronted you. Kale was scared, but he would’ve done anything for you and you even used that.”
Cross shook his head. “No.”
“You can deny it all you like. I know you can feel the truth of it. You come by your psychic abilities honestly. I got in your head that day and knew what you planned, which way you chose to get out and I headed you off. I gave you a choice. You could stand down and let me take you back –”
“Or you would kill me,” Cross could almost grasp the memory. “I tried to kill you.”
“And I tried to kill you back. Kale shoved you out of the way. The bullet meant to take your life put you in a coma for over a month. When you woke, you were blind.”
“So why keep me alive at all? You had the choice.” Anger, betrayal and confusion were beginning to work through the numbness.
“If it had truly been my choice you wouldn’t be here now. I would have finished what I started. Whether you remember it or not, you are a dangerous man, Cross.”
Coben spoke up again. “Tanya wanted you alive, but you were unpredictable, volatile.”
“Imagine that, a hostile fourteen-year-old, especially one who’d been kept hostage his whole life.”
“That attitude is exactly why we did what we did,” Coben said.
“And what exactly did you do?”
“We needed you alive, we wanted to study how you did the things you did, how you manipulated energy, but we also needed you to control Kale. The one thing we absolutely could not allow was for you and Kale to get together again. If you knew he was alive we knew you would stop at nothing to get to him.”
“Kale is alive?” He hoped but he didn’t want to believe it, not if it wasn’t true.
“Yes,” Coben said.
Cross let out a shuddering breath, he gripped Niko simply to have something to ground him. “You let me believe he was dead, all this time.”
“It was necessary. Kale would work with us if we agreed to keep you safe. So we made a choice. We gave you a new life. Wiped all your memories and gave you new ones. Ones we thought you could live with. Ones we thought would make you complacent. Your entire life has been carefully orchestrated, Cross. From the implanted memories, to your foster parents, home schooling, colleges. Your placement in the department. All of it planned, all of it played out according to script. Even Finn.”
He turned once more to Finn. “What about Finn?”
Coben’s voice sounded as if he might actually be enjoying destroying Cross’s life with nothing more than words. “Finn was put in place when you were hired as a profiler for the department. He is, for lack of a better word, your babysitter.”
Cross felt heat spread through him. He was breathing faster than he should. He felt like he was floating. His reality had been turned inside out and upside down. “My babysitter?”
His partner remained silent. No denials. No outrage at what Gabriel had said.
“Technically your job was real. Finn and you are partners, but his main job was to watch you. He wrote monthly reports on any problems with the psychic blocks or your implanted memories. Everything was going smoothly until last night.”
“Why tell me all this now?” His voice sounded hollow. He couldn’t deal with Finn’s betrayal right now. “Why not just do what you did to me ten years ago? Why the big reveal. If everything you told me is the truth, then you want something from me. Something I couldn’t give you the way I was.”
He heard Gabriel grunt. “We knew this day would come. When you collapsed yesterday my vote was to kill you before you woke up.”
“At least you’re consistent,” Cross said. “So why am I still alive?”
“Your brother has been in contact with you,” Coben said. “Don’t bother to deny it. He already admitted it. He had one rule, no contact. He broke that rule beca
use he understood what was happening to you. He also told Tanya he would refuse to cooperate if we hurt you. For the last ten years, he’s done everything we’ve asked of him just to keep you safe. He wasn’t happy when he found out we brought you back in.”
“I want to be with him.” To Cross it wasn’t a request. Kale was alive. After ten years, he learned his brother was alive. All he wanted was to be sure, to touch him, to make sure he was real.
“Not happening,” Coben said.
Cross swallowed down the sudden anger that flooded through him. He wanted to smash Coben’s face. He wanted to smash something. Instead he took a breath to calm himself.
It didn’t work as well as he would’ve liked. “Fine, it would be easier with your help. But I can find him on my own. I remember we had a psychic connection when we were kids. What do you want to bet we still do?” He flipped the covers off and put a hand on the bed rail with every intention of getting out of bed, and with Niko’s help, finding his brother. He didn’t know how, but if Kale could contact him, then Cross would sure as hell figure out a way to find his brother. He heard Niko jump off the bed and then in the next instant he felt cold metal encircle his wrist. A harsh ratcheting sound and then the clang of metal on metal.
He moved his hand and was brought up short. Handcuffs. Someone had just handcuffed him to the bed. Cross yanked hard on the cuff. It hurt his wrist and he didn’t care. The anger he’d tried to push down flared to life. “What the fuck? Get these off me, now.” He didn’t raise his voice. He didn’t need to. His barely contained rage was in every word. Niko whined, obviously distressed.
“We don’t need to do it this way, Cross. It’s up to you.”
“It’s up to me? Fantastic. Unlock the cuffs.” Panic begin to take the place of the anger. “Coben, you can’t just lock me up. I didn’t do anything!”
“It’s not what you did,” Coben said. “It’s what you’re capable of doing that concerns me.”
“And if I don’t agree? What then? You going to have Gabriel shoot me again?”
“I don’t think it will come to that, but we do have Kale. It might be in his best interest if you cooperated.”
And just like that everything changed. He didn’t even consider that. Coben’s words froze Cross to the core. We have Kale.
“You said you needed him,” Cross said, hoping they really did.
“We do. I didn’t say we would kill him. Perhaps we’ll only make him wish we did.”
“So what, you put me in one of the glass walled rooms down in the containment unit? So, I’m one of the freaks, now?” Panic definitely was winning out over anger. Cross didn’t like that. Anger felt much better.
“You were always one of the freaks,” Coben said. “You just never knew it.”
Cross pulled on his wrist again. “Jesus, Coben. I work for you.”
“Not anymore. If you behave, we’ll keep you in medical until they clear you. Finn will stay with you. If you’re good. Maybe we’ll even set you up in one of the secured witness apartments. Call it a professional courtesy. If you give Finn a hard time, your brother will be the one to pay. That, and perhaps we might make one of those glass-walled rooms available. As I said, your choice.” Cross heard Coben leave, his soft-soled shoes scuffing the floor as he walked away. He paused. “Oh and the dog…”
That got Cross’s attention. “What about her?” Everything was on alert now. Coben had managed to find the one thing that meant more to Cross than his own life.
“Can’t let you keep it.” Niko’s tags chimed on her collar as she whined. Her claws scrabbled on the smooth flooring as she was being pulled or dragged out of the room.
“Wait, Coben, no. You can’t take Niko-” the thought of being without her had Cross in full-blown panic mode. Begging was not beneath him. “Coben, please. Don’t do this. She’s my eyes, man. I’ll do what you want, whatever you want. Please just don’t take Niko.”
“I’m sorry, Cross. For whatever that’s worth, I truly am sorry.” He heard shoes on the floor, heading to the door, two pair, Gabriel and Coben he assumed.
Cross tried to jump out of the bed but both Finn and the cuffs keep him there. Niko whined once as she was being led away from his room.
“No, God, Coben, please don’t do this. Finn stop him, you have to stop him.” Tears streamed down his face with the pleas. He didn’t care, any pride he might have had left with Niko. Cross listened, but Niko was gone. He shoved Finn’s hand off his chest. “Get the fuck off me,”
Finn took his hand away. Cross gave one last futile yank on his cuffed wrist, pulled his knees up and lowered his head into the crook of his free arm.
“Cross…” Finn’s voice cracked.
“Just tell me one thing,” Cross said, his head still buried in his arm. “Was any of it real? I trusted you, I thought…” Cross didn’t know what he thought anymore. “Fuck it, just fuck it all.”
“It’s not like Coben said. It was real, it is real. You and me, that’s real.” Cross heard the emotion in Finn’s voice. He could’ve looked in his head to understand exactly what was real, but he honestly didn’t care. He was pulled apart and didn’t know how to put himself back together again.
“So Coben lied, you’re not my babysitter? Your real job wasn’t to keep an eye on me?” A sudden thought occurred to him. “Jesus, you knew, didn’t you? You knew Kale was alive.”
“Shit,” Finn sounded miserable which only made Cross furious. What right did he have to be miserable?
“Leave me alone, Finn. Leave me the hell alone.”
“I can’t.” The words were barely more than a whisper, but Cross heard him.
“Right. Babysitter.” Cross lay back on the pillow and tried to figure out what the hell happened to his life. Two days ago he was finishing up his report on the King kids. Yesterday he was fighting for his life in an abandoned cemetery and today… Holy hell, today…
“What happens now?” he said.
“Exactly what Coben said. He’s planning on housing you in one of the vacant secured apartments. If you were anyone else, he’d put you in containment.”
Containment was where the department placed new acquisitions until it could be determined how dangerous they were. One room with a front glass wall. Security depended on what abilities the person housed there had. No privacy, no contact. Food and water delivered through an anteroom.
The secured apartment was no less of a prison, but a gilded one. A small living space with a bedroom and bath. The door opened with a key card and cameras recorded live feed from every room. The illusion of privacy was just that, an illusion. The apartments were only a step up from the containment units and were earned with good behavior. It didn’t give Cross any comfort that Coben wanted him there. “Yeah, I’m lucky like that.”
The spectrum of raw emotions he had just been through in the last few moments left Cross exhausted. He despised self-pity, but thought he was due one moment. “I thought you were a friend.” Cross angled his face toward where Finn stood by his bed. “Was any of it real? I thought…” His voice trailed off, he didn’t know what he thought anymore. He wasn’t sure if Finn’s answer even mattered.
“That part was real. I am your friend.”
Cross choked out a laugh. “I could almost handle the rest of it, but you Finn,” He lowered his head and grinned. “I wasn’t expecting that. I gotta give you credit though, you played the part to perfection.”
“You don’t understand.”
That brought Cross’s head back up to face Finn. “Really? What part do I have wrong? I might be blind, but the ears work just fine. So let me recap, basically I’m an experiment that went wrong –”
“Cross –”
“No, no let me finish. My entire life has been a lie. Everything I remember, my childhood, my parents. All lies. The father I remember grieving for has been instrumental in wiping my past away to keep me, what? Malleable?” Cross pulled on the handcuffs as he spoke. “And you, Finn. My friend, who turns out to
be nothing more than a glorified babysitter, hired to keep an eye on me. Did they pay you extra to get me to trust you? They should have, because let me tell you, you did a hell of a job.”
“That’s how it started, man. I won’t lie to you, but it’s not how it ended. I am your friend. You have to believe me on that.”
Cross laughed. “You won’t lie to me? I have to believe you, trust you? That’s good, Finn, that’s really good. Coben threatened my brother if I don’t do what he wants, that’s the only thing I trust right now. That’s what I believe.”
He was tired and done with talking, done with lies. He turned away from Finn as much as he was able with one hand restrained, closed his eyes and tried like hell to shut the world out for a little while. He needed quiet, he needed peace. He needed to find his center to make sense out of the mess he was in. It was doubtful any of that was going to happen, but he refused to say another word to Finn.
Sometime in the night, sleep took pity on him. He wished he could have said the same for his dreams.
Chapter 5
TANYA SANTIAGO SAT behind Jenner Coben’s desk with her feet propped on the polished wood because she knew it would piss him off. A live feed of Cross Delancey freaking out in medical played on Coben’s computer. That she accessed his computer would piss the man off as well. She sincerely hoped so. Technically, as the department’s director, Coben was her boss. Tanya was one step below him as the head of the containment unit. She considered it a temporary inconvenience. Someday this office would be hers.
Her chief of security wrapped his arms around her from behind and bent down to nuzzle her neck. “Think we have time for a quickie before Coben comes back?” He turned her around in the leather chair to face him. “We could do it right on his desk,” his hands fondled her breasts. “The fat prick would never know.”
Tanya trapped him between her long legs and considered Robert’s less than subtle request for a half a second. She turned back to look at the monitor again and saw Coben take Cross’s dog and leave medical. She reluctantly freed Robert and smoothed her skirt down. “As much as the thought delights me, Coben seems to be finished with Cross.” She stood and was nearly as tall as Robert’s own six- three. “Coben and I have business to discuss. So, go stand in the corner, put on your stern face and pretend your job is just to keep me safe from all those scary freaks down in containment.”
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