My Sister Jodie

by Jacqueline Wilson

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  more anyway. I just can’t make the effort. But maybe . . .’ She smiled at me. ‘I’ve had a little idea.

  I’ll mull it over. Now off you go. Bravely beard Matron in her den and ask if you can play with Harriet.’

  Beard was the appropriate word for poor Matron.

  She didn’t have a real beard, but she had whiskers on her chin and heavy down on her upper lip. She was fat, but she squashed her very large chest and stomach and bottom into some kind of corset so that she didn’t wobble when she walked. She had surprisingly slim legs with elegant ankles and little pointy shoes. She looked like a well-upholstered sofa on tiny wheels.

  I’d always scuttled out of her way, imagining she’d be ultra-scary. The door to the girls’ house was open so I wandered in uncertainly. I knew Sakura’s bedroom was upstairs but I didn’t have a clue where to look for Harriet.

  I could hear laughter and a television somewhere but I didn’t like to barge in uninvited. I stood shifting from one foot to the other until Matron suddenly shot out of a room at the end of the corridor, balancing an enormous pile of pillowcases and sheets and duvet covers. She peered at me from over the top.

  ‘Ah! You’re Mr and Mrs Well’s little girl . . .

  Jodie?’

  ‘No, I’m Pearl.’

  ‘Yes, that’s right, Jodie’s the one with startling hair. Lucky she’s not boarding with me. I’d have held her under a hot tap until I’d scrubbed all that purple out.’

  ‘Mum tried that,’ I said.

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  ‘Oh dear. Perhaps it’s indelible, like those pencils.

  They’re purple, aren’t they? Anyway, my darling, how can I help?’

  I wondered if I could play with Harriet?’ I asked timidly.

  ‘Of course you can, you silly sausage! Her dorm’s on the second floor. You’ll find it easily because it’s the noisiest, what with Harriet gassing and poor little Freya grizzling and Sheba singing and Clarissa showing off.’ She laughed fondly. ‘You can carry these sheets up for me and pop them in the airing cupboard, there’s a darling.’

  I staggered up the stairs, found the airing cupboard, stuffed the sheets in as best I could – and then listened. Matron was right. I could hear all the girls laughing and playing very loud music. I went over to their door, wondering whether to knock or just stick my head in. I licked my lips, rehearsing in my head what I was going to say.

  Can I play with you? sounded so young, like I was six and wanting to play with Barbies. In the end I tapped once on the door. The music stopped. I heard squeals and giggles and a lot of scuffling. I waited, heart beating. Then Harriet opened the door a few centimetres.

  ‘Oh, Pearl, it’s only you! Come in, come in,’ she said, grabbing hold of me and pulling me into the dorm. ‘We thought you might be Matron!’

  Harry had a dressing gown on and the other three were in bed, their duvets up to their chins.

  ‘Oh, sorry! I didn’t realize you went to bed this early,’ I stammered.

  ‘We’re not in bed. We’re hiding,’ said Clarissa, jumping up from under her duvet. She wore her 330

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  knickers and a silk scarf tied round her chest and fishnet stockings on her skinny legs. I stared at her open-mouthed.

  ‘We’re playing at being lap dancers,’ she said.

  ‘Well, I’m a fan dancer,’ said Sheba, kicking off her duvet. She was wearing her swimming costume and had a big feathery fan in her hand.

  ‘I’m a dancer too,’ said Freya. She wore a proper bikini and she’d crayoned roses and hearts around her belly button.

  ‘Tra-la!’ said Harry, flinging off her dressing gown. She was wearing her school knickers and a little lacy bolero over her flat chest. She twirled around, bumping and grinding her hips. ‘You do it like this, don’t you, Pearl? Funny old Freya thought lap dancing was actually dancing in someone’s lap, but they’d get all squashed, wouldn’t they?’

  ‘You don’t think we’re terribly rude, do you, Pearl?’ Freya asked anxiously.

  ‘Don’t tell Matron!’ said Sheba.

  ‘Of course I won’t. Look, my sister Jodie and I often mess around like this. Hey, it was soooo embarrassing when we first moved here. We were painting our room and getting all messy so we stripped off down to our knickers, and guess what, Harley walked right in and saw us!’

  ‘Harley saw you in your knickers!’

  They all exploded with laughter.

  ‘Did he see your sister too?’ asked Clarissa.

  ‘Yes, but she didn’t mind. She doesn’t get fussed about stuff,’ I said.

  ‘I’ll say,’ said Clarissa.

  I swallowed. ‘What do you mean by that?’

  ‘She didn’t mean anything, Pearl,’ said Harriet.

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  ‘I just meant that your sister truly doesn’t seem to care about anything. My cousin Anna’s in Year Eight and she says she’s . . . incredible.’

  ‘Yeah, well, that’s Jodie,’ I said.

  I stared hard at Clarissa, silently daring her to say any more.

  ‘You’re so different from your sister,’ said Freya.

  ‘I know,’ I said. ‘I wish I was more like her.’

  ‘I’m glad you’re like you,’ said Harry. ‘OK, are you going to lap dance too, Pearl?’

  I felt a total fool, but I dared to whip off my skirt and shoes, and then I pranced about a bit, winking and wriggling, copying the way Jodie danced. The others all laughed and clapped and joined in.

  When we got tired of lap dancing, I suggested we pretend we were a new girl band and we made up our own dance routine. Matron really did come knocking on the door because of all the thumping, but she didn’t come in, she just called out for us to quieten down because she was starting to put the little ones to bed.

  I decided I’d better get back myself. Harry begged me to come and play with them the next day.

  ‘It’s such fun when you’re here, Pearl,’ said Harry, giving me a hug. ‘I wish you were a proper boarder and could sleep in our dormie.’

  I almost wished it too. I skipped back along the path, waving at the bungalow in case Mrs Wilberforce could see me. I slowed down when I got near the little trail to the badger set. There was a brown smudge on the lane which might have been blood from the poor badger cub. I went to see if Harley was crouching by the set, but there was no one there. I went and knelt by the main entrance.

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  ‘I’m so sorry,’ I whispered into the darkness. ‘You must be missing your cub so much. I hope you have lots and lots more children and they all live long happy lives.’

  Then I went back to our flat. Mum had a bad migraine headache and had gone to bed early. Dad was watching sport on the television, his shoes kicked off, his belt unbuckled. He was sipping beer straight from the can and eating a packet of salted peanuts.

  ‘Don’t tell Mum!’ he mouthed.

  Jodie wasn’t in our bedroom. I didn’t know where she could be. I wondered if she might be taking Old Shep for another walk. I waited and waited. It was past our bedtime now. Mum was asleep, thank goodness. I crept into the living room and saw that Dad had nodded off too, his hand lolling over the arm of his chair so that the dregs of his beer can dripped onto the carpet.

  I wanted to climb up onto Dad’s lap, but if I woke him, he’d fuss about Jodie, maybe even wake Mum.

  I tiptoed back to our bedroom, worrying about the back door. When Dad woke up, he’d bolt it and then Jodie would be locked out all night. It was raining outside. I could hear raindrops pattering steadily against the window. I thought of Jodie trud
ging through the dark, getting drenched.

  She slipped into our bedroom at long last. I threw my arms around her in relief. She was warm and bone dry.

  ‘Where have you been?’

  ‘Just around and about,’ she said vaguely.

  ‘But where? I was so worried. I wish you wouldn’t go off without me.’

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  ‘ You do!’ said Jodie. ‘I went to meet you at the Wilberforce house but you weren’t anywhere. What were you up to? Badger-watching with Harley?’

  ‘No.’ I hesitated. I felt so guilty having friends when Jodie didn’t. ‘I was just playing with Harriet.’

  ‘What, she came calling for you?’

  ‘No, I went to the girls’ house.’

  Jodie raised her eyebrows but didn’t say anything.

  I swallowed. ‘You don’t mind, do you, Jodie?’

  ‘Of course not,’ she said. ‘So, did you have fun?’

  ‘Well, sort of. We played this lap-dancing game and then we made out we were a girl band. That was my idea, actually.’

  ‘Good for you,’ said Jodie.

  ‘Well, it was all a bit silly really. We have much more fun,’ I said.

  Jodie shrugged.

  ‘You know we do,’ I said. I pulled her nearer to me. ‘Jodie, where were you? Don’t have secrets from me. I hate it so.’

  Jodie tapped me lightly on the end of my nose.

  ‘Nosy!’ she said.

  ‘Were you seeing Jed?’

  ‘ No! Look, I wasn’t seeing anyone, I just went for a walk.’

  ‘No you didn’t. It’s pouring with rain outside.’

  ‘I didn’t say I was outside. I went for a walk inside.’ Jodie made her two fingers walk upwards.

  ‘You were upstairs? You didn’t go up to the attics all alone?’

  ‘I went all the way up to the tower room.’

  ‘You didn’t! How did you get the door open by yourself?’

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  ‘I moved a trunk out of one of the rooms and stood on it to reach the bolt. We didn’t relock it after we went up there, you and me and Harley. So I could get in easy-peasy.’

  ‘In the dark?’

  ‘Yeah, I should have taken your torch. But I was OK once I got up the stairs. It was so weird up in the tower room by myself.’

  ‘Weren’t you scared, Jodie? What about the ghost?’

  ‘I wasn’t scared,’ she said. Then she grinned at me, tucking her mad hair behind her little pierced ears. ‘Well, of course I was scared at first. So scared I was practically wetting myself. All the way up those dark stairs I kept thinking that the ghost would be up there, waiting for me, reaching out with her pale hands—’

  ‘Stop it! Oh, you’re so mad, how could you still go up!’

  ‘I wanted to see if I had the bottle. It was like a test. Could I risk the Curse of the Tower Room! The more frightened I got, the more I simply had to make myself. When I got up to the tower room at last and stepped out onto the carpet, I felt something trailing over my face and I just about died. I screamed like a total nutcase and swatted the air, shrieking, “Get away from me! ’’ Then I realized it was just a stupid cobweb and I started laughing at myself and then I wasn’t scared at all. I felt fantastic, up there all on my own, with the rain beating against the windows. I walked round and round in a circle. I even started running round until I felt completely dizzy.’

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  and creaky. You could have fallen right through.

  Oh, Jodie, please, please don’t go up there ever again, promise me.’ I clung to her, nearly in tears.

  ‘OK, OK, don’t get in such a state! I promise.’

  But we both knew Jodie didn’t always keep her promises.

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  Mum sat me down carving pumpkins.

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  I decided I wouldn’t go and play with Harriet and the others after school no matter how much I wanted to. I wouldn’t even go off with Harley. I’d find Jodie and stick with her, no matter what.

  I saw Mr Wilberforce go over to the Year Eight table at tea time the next day. Jodie was lolling on the end of the bench, staring into space, taking no notice of the girls giggling opposite her. Harley was sitting beside her but she was ignoring him too. She was staring up at the ceiling. I wondered if she was imagining herself up in the tower room. She jumped when Mr Wilberforce came up behind her and put a hand on her shoulder. He murmured something in her ear and then walked off. Jodie slid off her bench and followed him, everyone staring at her.

  I scuttled over to Harley.

  ‘What’s happening?’

  ‘Mr Wilberforce just said he wanted to see her in his study,’ said Harley.

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  ‘Your sister is so much trouble,’ said Jessica, her eyes shining maliciously. ‘You should have heard what she said to Mr Michaels today! I shouldn’t wonder if she gets expelled. I mean, the way she acts, the way she looks!’

  I took no notice of their silly tittle-tattle. I turned and went to follow Jodie. Harley came with me. We sat on the stairs, waiting for her to come out of Mr Wilberforce’s study. I kept picturing him, stern but still kindly, cataloguing all Jodie’s crimes, minor and major. I saw her cheeking him, trying to make him laugh. He’d get fiercer then, cutting her down to size. I turned his big pink hands into scissors going snip snip snip at my sister, so she got smaller and smaller until she was just little shreds of skin and purple fluff.

  I craned my head, listening anxiously. Harley dared to creep right over to the door and put his ear against it. He tried listening for a while and then tiptoed back.

  ‘I can’t really hear anything,’ he whispered.

  ‘There’s just the buzz of Mr Wilberforce’s voice but I can’t make out what he’s saying.’

  ‘And Jodie?’

  ‘She doesn’t seem to be saying anything at all.’

  This seemed a very bad sign. I started biting my nails.

  ‘Don’t,’ said Harley, pulling my hand away from my mouth and keeping hold of it.

  ‘He wouldn’t really expel her, would he?’ I whispered.

  ‘I don’t know. I’ve been expelled, because I never fit in anywhere.’

  ‘Jodie doesn’t want to fit in here,’ I said.

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  ‘But you do. You’ve made friends with that funny girl with the plaits.’

  ‘Harriet.’

  ‘And all her cronies.’

  ‘Yes, Freya and Sheba are OK. I suppose Clarissa is sometimes.’

  ‘And you’ve made friends with me too. I’m OK-ish, aren’t I?’

  ‘You can leave out the ish,’ I said. ‘You know I like you best, Harley. I like it here, ever so. But if Jodie gets expelled, we’ll have to leave and Mum will be so cross with Jodie, and Dad will be so hurt and it will be just awful for her.’

  I pictured Jodie, pale and defiant, trying hard not to cry. I felt my own eyes getting watery. Then the study door opened and Jodie bounced out, positively beaming. She saw us, shut the door behind her, and then strutted over to us, grinning all over her face.

  ‘Hey there,’ she said, giving us a little wave.

  ‘What are you doing here?’

  ‘Waiting for you!’ I said.

  ‘Oh, sweet,’ said Jodie. ‘Well, I’ve got to run.’

  She started striding off down the hall to the main door.

  ‘Where are you going?’ I said, running after her.

  ‘Oh, Jodie, are you really all right? What did Mr Wilberforce say t
o you? Did he get really cross with you?’

  ‘No! We’re like friends, you know we are. Oh, he said a bit of boring stuff about working harder and not cheeking that sad sap Michaels – but mostly he’s ultra pleased with me.’

  ‘Who are you trying to kid, Jodie?’ said Harley.

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  ‘It’s true! He said he’s noticed how good I am with the little kids, Zeph and Sakura and Dan, and how they’re all a bit unsettled now that term’s started, so he wants me to spend more time with them, especially after tea. Not just our three: all the littlies under seven. He wants me to read them bedtime stories and make a fuss of them.’

  I wondered if Mrs Wilberforce had had a word with her husband.

  ‘That’s a brilliant idea,’ I said.

  Harley pulled a face. ‘More like crazy,’ he said.

  ‘Jodie’s not exactly Mary Poppins.’

  ‘Jodie’s better than Mary Poppins,’ I said firmly.

  Harley’s eyebrows hitched an inch up his face.

  ‘No, truthfully,’ I said. ‘Jodie was always wonderful to me when I was little.’

  ‘You’re still little now and Jodie’s frequently horrible to you,’ said Harley. ‘She bosses you about so.’

  ‘No she doesn’t, she just looks after me. She was like a second mum to me, always playing with me and teaching me stuff. She was magic,’ I said.

  She proved herself magical to all the little ones.

  She went along to tuck them up that evening. She told them she was a purple princess and she gave every small child a tiny purple tattoo to show they were her special princelings.

  Zeph wanted an elephant tattoo. Jodie did her best. It didn’t show up very well on his dark brown skin so she outlined it with silver. Sakura wanted a purple lotus flower, which was easy enough. Dan wanted a daisy, even easier. The other children were also easily pleased, the boys mostly wanting flash cars and jet planes and guns, the girls 342

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  wanting cuddly teddies or birds or butterflies.

  Jodie told the boys a bedtime story about a superman schoolboy who drove his own limo, and then she went to the girls’ house and told them a story about a baby teddy called Little Paws. The boys loved her, the girls loved her. They all begged her to kiss them goodnight.