‘I think you’d better tell us,’ he said. ‘Tell us what’s going on.’
‘It was while you were in Southampton,’ Don said. ‘Your mum was so worried about you – we both were – and that’s when she told me she was going to email Storm and beg him to come and play the festival. I tried to stop her; I tried to tell her not to meddle but she insisted. She wanted to save the festival for you. I know you and she aren’t as close as you used to be, Willow, but she did it for you, because she loves you.’
‘I don’t understand what you’re talking about,’ Willow said.
‘I just want you to know how much your mum loves you, how much we both love you before I tell you everything.’
Willow felt herself tense, as though her body was getting itself ready for something she’d known was coming since the day she and Luc had listened to the tape in the studio, the day he accidentally called her Lil.
Don began to tell her how he and Cathy really met and about how The Laurels came into being on Storm Tyler’s ill-fated solo tour. He told her about her mother’s affair with Storm Tyler and how that ended before Storm disappeared.
When he finished Willow turned to Luc who was staring at Don, his brow furrowed.
‘You and Cathy have known where he was all this time,’ Luc said. ‘You’ve known even as you’ve watched Willow worry about what to do, worry about the festival.’
Willow felt as though everything around her was spinning out of control, as though all the things she had believed about herself were coming undone.
‘Cathy wanted to get in touch with Storm Tyler from the start,’ Don said. ‘Well, once she’d got over the shock of you promising the council that you’d find him. Even though she knew she’d have to tell you everything about the past, Willow, she still wanted to help you. It was me who tried to stop her. Blame me not your mother.’
Willow pushed herself away from Luc’s hand and towards her father. She felt rage roiling inside her, rage she had been bottling up since Krystal and Annelise knocked on Luc’s door, since she’d found out about Charlie and Kate.
‘I don’t think I can talk about this anymore,’ she said, her voice thin with anger. ‘I think I need some time to think.’
‘I’ll go,’ Don said.
‘I think that’s a good idea,’ Willow replied.
‘Willow.’ She heard Luc’s voice, gentle and soothing from behind her.
Don’s eyes darted towards Luc’s before he turned to leave. For some reason that made Willow even more angry, as though there was something else that her father wasn’t telling her.
‘Why?’ she asked her father’s back as he stood in the doorway. ‘Why did you never say anything?’
‘Your mother never wanted—’
‘You’re my dad,’ Willow interrupted. ‘You should have told me everything years ago. You certainly should have told me as soon as you knew I was looking for Storm.’ She stopped, turning her head to look at Luc. ‘I wish I’d never listened to that bloody tape,’ she said.
When she turned back towards her father he was facing her again, but he wasn’t looking at her, he was looking at Luc as though there was something else.
‘You all love keeping secrets though, don’t you?’ she said. ‘You’ve kept Luc’s little secret from me for the last two years as well.’
‘Willow, come on,’ Luc said, a warning in his voice. ‘That was my fault. I asked him not to tell anyone.’
‘What else are you hiding?’ Willow asked her father. And for a moment he looked as though he might say something before he turned and left.
As her father walked away Willow knew there was more to the story, and she knew that she’d been right all those weeks ago when she felt she’d been opening a Pandora’s box.
*
‘My mother had an affair with Storm Tyler when she was a teenager,’ Willow said, unable to believe it. Her heart was still pounding in her chest from the argument with her father as Luc handed her a cup of herbal tea.
‘So it would seem,’ he replied, his voice neutral. ‘Are you OK?’
Willow shrugged. ‘No. Not really.’
He leant in towards her, draping his arm around her shoulders, but she moved away, pacing the shop floor. She was angry with her father, angry with her mother and she hadn’t made up her mind as to whether she was angry with Luc or not. But she was glad he was there all the same. He looked as shell-shocked as she was.
‘Why has Mum never spoken about any of this?’ Willow said. ‘I had no idea that she got into the Royal Academy let alone that she left to go on tour with Storm and that was where she met Dad and Krystal.’
‘Where did she tell you they all met?’ Luc asked.
‘She always said she met them in a pub in London, that Don and Krystal had been playing there and asked her to join them.’
‘That’s what Mum told me too.’
‘Well at least they got their stories straight,’ Willow said, standing still for a moment to look out of the window towards the sea.
‘Did you ask questions? Did you wonder about your mum and dad and The Laurels before we were born?’
‘All the time,’ Willow replied. ‘I was always asking questions, wanting to see photographs but whenever I talked about it I either got the brush-off or Mum would look so sad that I kept quiet.’ She paused. ‘Did you? Did you ask Krystal?’
He nodded. ‘Yeah, but she never told me much. She was always too busy making me focus on my own music. I stopped asking in the end.’
Willow could feel the anger rising inside her again and took a few deep breaths, trying to calm herself. She heard Luc walk over to her. He stood behind her, one hand on her shoulder. She didn’t move away this time, instead letting herself lean into him, into his warmth and strength.
‘We should have kept asking,’ she said.
‘They should have told us.’
As Luc said those words, something in Willow broke apart. She turned around to look at him.
‘And you should have told me about your daughter,’ she snapped at him. ‘Krystal’s taught you all about keeping secrets, hasn’t she? You know all about not telling people things, about lying to your friends, about hurting the people who love you the most…’ She stared at him for a moment before turning away, walking towards the back of the shop, towards her mum’s workshop, away from him.
He caught up with her before she got to the door, a light touch on her arm. She stopped and turned around.
‘You love me?’ he asked.
She hadn’t meant to say that to him. She hadn’t meant to say any of it. She was taking her confusion out on him, her anger at her mother. Whatever secrets Luc had kept from her, none of this was his fault.
‘I didn’t…’ She paused.
Luc looked away. ‘I’m sorry,’ he said. ‘I never meant to hurt you, not then and not now. I should have told you about Annelise. I…’
‘It’s OK,’ Willow said. ‘I know you’re sorry. So much has happened over the last few weeks and this feels like the final straw.’ She felt tears burning the backs of her eyes again. She didn’t want to cry in front of him but it was too late. ‘Every time I think I know what I want, every time I try to move forward, something falls apart all over again,’ she said.
He took her hand and led her into her mother’s workshop. They sat there together surrounded by the smell of wood shavings, memories falling around them like autumn leaves. She leant her head against his shoulder and let herself cry. She felt his lips brush the top of her head.
‘It’s going to be all right,’ he said. ‘I promise.’
She didn’t know how long they sat there like that or how many customers had tried the locked door of The Music Shop in that time, but she didn’t want to move or let this moment end. She didn’t want to have to face the reality that waited for her.
Eventually, she sat up and rubbed her eyes, that feeling she’d had earlier when her father looked over at Luc had returned. That feeling that her father was keepin
g something else from her, something significant.
‘When did King Silver split up?’ she asked. ‘When did Storm Tyler disappear?’
‘Towards the end of 1987,’ Luc replied.
‘A few months before I was born.’
Luc nodded slowly at the statement as though he knew exactly what she was thinking.
‘Luc, do you think Storm Tyler is my father? Do you think that’s why Mum and Dad haven’t told me any of this? Do you think that’s why Dad left in the end?’
He sighed and leant back in his chair. ‘I don’t know,’ he replied. Willow’s heart sank. She’d been hoping he’d laugh at her, tell her she was being ridiculous. ‘But does it matter? It was Don who brought you up, Don who taught you to play mandolin, Don who loves you.’ He looked away from her. ‘Anyone can father a child, not everyone can be a dad.’
She exhaled deeply trying to let go of the tension she’d been holding on to.
‘Are you still playing?’ Luc asked.
Willow nodded. She’d picked up her father’s mandolin as soon as she’d opened the shop that morning. Playing had calmed her down after everything that had happened in London and Southampton and she knew she’d missed playing more than anything – she regretted the years she’d spent ignoring music. If one good thing had come out of this disaster of a summer, it was picking up the mandolin again.
‘What do you want to do?’ Luc asked.
‘I just need some time if that’s OK,’ she replied. ‘Time to process everything that’s happened. I know I need to talk to Mum but it will have to wait.’
‘Do you want me to be there when you do talk to Cathy?’ he said as he stood to leave.
‘Is that OK?’
‘Of course it is. Anything you need me to do, I’m here. All you have to do is ask.’ He smiled and Willow’s stomach flipped. ‘You never know,’ he said. ‘Some good might come out of all of this. Storm Tyler might play the festival after all.’
*
Over the next week Willow saw Luc every morning when he and Annelise brought her coffee and pastries.
‘I’ve eaten my own body weight in carbs this summer.’ Willow laughed. ‘I’ve finally got my clothes back and I won’t be able to fit in them.’
‘You look amazing,’ Luc replied. ‘Much better than when you first got here, so shut up and eat your croissant.’
Luc and Annelise never stayed for long. Annelise got bored easily, just as Luc had done at that age, and wanted to play on the beach or have another guitar lesson, but they came every day. Each morning Willow watched the bond between father and daughter grow and knew that she could never come between them, that she and Luc could never be more than friends. Even if there was a chance for her and Luc one day in the future, both he and Annelise had a life in America that they were going back to. This summer was nothing more than a hiatus for all of them.
Each morning she told Luc that she’d talk to her mother the next day, but she never found the courage to do it. Cathy must know that Don had told them everything, but she seemed as reluctant as Willow to actually talk about it and the two women danced around each other if they found themselves in the house at the same time. Willow wanted to know how the festival was going, whether her mother had heard back from Storm Tyler but something always stopped her from asking.
She thought about her mum’s past all the time though. She couldn’t imagine having parents who would stand in the way of what you wanted to do the way Brian seemed to have done with Cathy.
Willow had never known her grandfather, but she’d heard about him from various musicians over the years. If she had a pound for everyone who told her they knew Brian Cole she’d be a very rich woman. Either Brian Cole knew a lot of people or a lot of people wished they knew him.
She’d always wondered why Cathy fell out with him and now she knew. But she also knew that there were two sides to every story and she couldn’t believe that Cathy and Brian hadn’t spoken to each other in nearly thirty-five years because of a crazy affair Cathy had with a rock star.
Unless there was more to it than that, unless it was more than just an affair.
The more she thought about it, the more convinced she was that her mother must have kept in touch with Storm regularly over the years to just be able to email him about the festival like this. Storm and Cathy recorded the demo together in 1999. Had Cathy kept in touch with him after that? Did they still have feelings for each other? Was Storm Tyler the reason Willow’s father left seven years later?
And Willow couldn’t stop thinking about the possibility that Storm was her father or connected to her somehow. She couldn’t imagine any other reason for the strange feeling she’d had when she found the tape, the way she’d known right from the beginning how important it was.
She needed to talk to her mother but she could only do it when her father wasn’t there.
One morning Luc arrived at The Music Shop without his daughter.
‘Annelise is with Mum,’ he said. ‘And your dad’s gone to Newport with Rocco so today we’re going to Cathy’s and the two of you are going to talk. You can’t avoid this anymore, Willow.’
*
If Cathy was surprised to see them both together on a Friday afternoon she didn’t show it. Willow felt Luc’s hand on her shoulder, squeezing gently just for a moment, encouraging her.
‘Can I get you anything?’ Cathy said. Her voice sounded strained, as though she knew what was about to happen.
‘Mum, can you sit down?’ Willow asked.
Cathy did as she was told, sitting opposite Willow and Luc, her eyes flicking from one to the other.
‘You want to talk about Storm Tyler I suppose,’ she said, giving Luc a look that Willow couldn’t quite interpret.
‘Dad told me about how The Laurels met,’ Willow said. ‘About you and Storm. He told me that you emailed him. Have you heard anything back?’
Cathy shook her head.
‘You should have told me when I found the tape,’ Willow said. Her mother sat still and straight, her mouth a thin line, her face pale, just as she had in the car after the planning meeting. She didn’t say anything.
‘I tried to talk to you after the planning meeting,’ Willow went on. ‘I tried to get you to tell me what you knew then but you wouldn’t. You’ve known where Storm was all along and you didn’t say anything.’
‘I’ve been in touch with Storm for years,’ Cathy replied. ‘And as I’m sure you’ve worked out, he was here on the Island in 1999 when we recorded the demo. He wanted to start again, make a comeback but it didn’t work out that way.’ She paused but didn’t look at Willow. ‘He was here again the summer before you went to university.’
Don hadn’t told her that and Willow felt a wave of nausea wash over her. She felt as though all her mother’s most well-kept secrets, her hopes and dreams had been spilled on to the floor and she didn’t want to know any more. She wished that she’d never listened to the tape, never made her rash promise at the council meeting in her hope to save the festival.
‘Do you think he’ll come again this summer?’ she asked. ‘Do you think he’ll play?’
‘I have no idea,’ Cathy replied. ‘I thought he would have replied to me by now. Maybe he’s away.’ Willow saw a sadness pass across her mother’s features and she cringed inside as she realised how stupid she’d been promising the council that she’d find Storm without talking to her mother first.
Cathy turned to look at Luc. ‘You should have known better,’ she said. ‘You shouldn’t have helped her in this mad endeavour.’
Luc held his hands up and looked as though he was about to say something.
‘Luc told me Storm probably didn’t want to be found,’ Willow interrupted. ‘But I insisted we try and find him. This isn’t Luc’s fault, Mum; this is entirely on me.’
‘How much do you know about Storm Tyler?’ Cathy asked, still looking at Luc.
‘Not much,’ he replied. ‘I just figured that as he’s been gone so long t
hat he disappeared for a reason and probably liked it that way.’
‘Storm Tyler was the reason your father left in the end,’ Cathy said quietly. ‘The reason The Laurels split up.’
Willow had suspected as much and she closed her eyes for a moment as though that would somehow turn back time and stop this horrible moment from happening. She should never have listened to the tape without her mother; she should never have gone behind her back.
‘Cathy…’ Luc began. He sounded as though he was about to apologise, but Willow thought it was too late when she saw the look of pale resignation on her mother’s face change to anger.
‘Luc,’ Cathy said, turning to look at him. ‘Well you’re very good at keeping secrets too aren’t you? Very good at going behind people’s backs and pretending that you’re somebody you aren’t.’
‘Mum,’ Willow said in shock. She’d never seen her mother like this.
‘Yes, Willow, you should have told me about the tape when you first found it,’ Cathy went on. ‘We could have avoided all of this. But you, Luc Harrison, you should have told Willow about your daughter before you broke her heart for the second time. She had come home to heal, to find herself, not to be broken by you all over again.’
‘It wasn’t like that, Mum,’ Willow said. ‘It isn’t like that.’ She started to stand up but she felt Luc’s hand on her thigh, warm and solid, and she sat back down again.
‘It’s OK, Willow,’ he said. ‘Your mum’s right. I do keep hurting you. I never meant to but I should have done everything differently.’ He paused. ‘Everything,’ he repeated.
He looked so sad and Willow thought her heart would break all over again. She wanted to reach out and hold him, draw him into her arms and tell him that it was OK, that everything was going to be all right. But she didn’t know if that was true. Luc had hurt her and now, between them, they had hurt Cathy. She was furious with her mother for keeping this from her for all these years, furious with her father and Krystal too, but at the same time she was angry with herself for causing her mother pain.
‘Isn’t it better that we all know the truth?’ Willow asked, trying to swallow down her anger, trying to swallow down the question that had plagued her since her father had told them everything.
The Summer Island Festival Page 21
