by Fiona Lowe
“Can you spare five more minutes?” Nicole asked as she pulled out into the road. “I was feeling so sick this morning that I totally forgot to pack Max’s lunch. I promised to bring it to him at school.”
“Sure, why not? I haven’t been to Whitetail Elementary in years. Do they still hang the kids’ art in the corridor?”
“They do. Mrs. Lindem is still teaching fourth grade too, so you better be careful.”
Melissa grimaced. “She wasn’t my biggest fan and then I got Mr. L at middle school so of course he never believed anything I said.”
Nicole pulled up in the school parking lot, which was located between the elementary and middle schools. At the far end, in stark contrast to the other utilitarian, brown brick buildings, was the preschool and kindergarten campus with its brightly painted fence and adventure garden and play equipment. “Are you coming in?”
“And risking the wrath of Mrs. Lindem? I think I’ll stay here.”
“Okay, I’ll be back in five.” Nicole walked quickly toward the double doors of the elementary school.
Melissa checked her phone for messages and found three. Amy had texted to say she might have to put back the first planned fitting by forty-eight hours. Emily wanted her to water her house plants because she was staying in Madison longer, and a supplier had dispatched the two wedding gowns Melissa had ordered to add to her slowly growing collection for future brides.
Her eye traveled to the text from Scott that he’d sent at 8:45 this morning. “How do you take your coffee?”
A shimmer of bliss ran through her as she remembered how he’d arrived at her door ten minutes later with coffee and a kiss that had led to her almost being late for her meeting. He’d mentioned he was working tonight but the bar closed early on a Tuesday so she wondered if he might want her to bring him over some pizza and beer. Or wine. Did he drink wine?
She shook her head, realizing how little she knew about him and then promptly reminded herself that she knew enough to know she didn’t need to know more. He was Johan’s single nephew, an unemployed classical musician working two jobs to meet rent like most people who failed to make it in the arts. All of it added up to him being a bed buddy only and, in that respect, he checked all the boxes and then some.
She glanced up from her phone and noticed the preschool and kindergarten children were out playing. They looked so cute and the increasingly familiar pang she got whenever she saw babies and little children burned her. As her gaze moved along the fence, she noticed the high security gate opening and a child wearing jeans and a sweater ran out. From the distance, it was hard to tell if it was a little girl or a boy.
A man hurried out, catching the child around the waist. He swung him or her up in the air, both stopping the kid from running away and creating delight at the same time. A moment later, he lowered the child back to the ground and with a firm hold of his or her hand, they started walking toward the sidewalk.
Melissa’s breath stalled and she blinked three times but nothing changed the image. She’d recognize that fluid gait anywhere. Dressed in his Udder Bar polo shirt and jeans, Scott Knapp was collecting a child from preschool.
Her mind lurched from point to point like a drunk trying to absorb and translate the messages from her eyes. Maybe he was helping Johan? She instantly ruled that idea out because she knew Johan’s grandchildren weren’t old enough for preschool. She squinted trying to see the child’s face but they’d moved farther away not closer.
As they reached the curb, Scott stopped and bent down as if he was instructing him or her on road safety. As his head touched the child’s she saw the identical chocolate-brown match. A hundred different emotions hit her at once making her nauseous and dizzy. The guy she was having no-strings-attached sex with was a father.
* * *
When the last customer said good-night at a conveniently early ten-thirty, Scott was pleased. As tonight’s shift had been unexpected due to staff illness, it meant his high school babysitter could get home before eleven and her parents wouldn’t be calling him saying they didn’t approve of her working for him midweek. It also meant an earlier night for him. When he’d done bar work in the past, he hadn’t been a dad so he’d been able to sleep late the next morning. No such luck now. In fact, he had a load of washing to do because this morning he’d allowed himself to get deliciously distracted with Melissa.
Melissa. What an unexpected gift she’d turned out to be. There weren’t many gorgeous women out there who just wanted him for sex, but when he’d pulled the no-dating card on her, relief had danced across her cheeks. Uncomplicated sex was usually an oxymoron, but this thing with Melissa seemed to be the real deal and as straightforward as the agreement they’d made. She wanted sex but not a relationship and as that fitted in with his needs and desires, who was he to argue?
He commenced the locking-up process, starting with the interior door, just in case someone decided they’d try to stop by for that one last late beer while he was still tidying up. As he flicked the latch he heard tapping on the outside door and he glanced up. Surprise and delight whipped through him. Melissa stood on the stoop, wearing a tightly sashed midlength trench coat, sheer stockings and high-heeled shoes.
Oh baby. She was a fantasy come true. He quickly opened both doors and pulled her in against him. “Perfect timing, Missy.” He kissed her neck and whispered, “I hope you’re naked under that coat.”
“No,” she said, her eyes a chilly blue, matching her tone.
The last time he’d seen her thirteen hours ago, those eyes had been slightly unfocused and full of post-sex euphoria.
She pressed her palms firmly against his forearms and pushed him away. “We need to talk.”
“Okaaay.” In his experience when a woman spoke those four words, it never meant good news would follow. He walked directly back behind the bar. “Do you want to argue with me with or without a drink?”
“You’re a father?”
Her rising infliction bounced around the empty bar loud, incredulous and accusatory, slamming into him with the velocity of a bullet. Uncomplicated sex? Who was he kidding?
He poured a finger of whiskey into two glasses and pushed one toward her. “I am.”
“Are you married?”
He raised his glass to her as fury simmered deep down inside him. “And thank you so much for the vote of confidence in my moral compass.”
She slammed her purse on the bar. “You don’t get to be self-righteous here, Scott. I would never have had sex with you if I’d known you were married.”
There was no point doing anything other than telling the truth. “I’m divorced.” He drained his glass and poured another one.
Relief crossed her face but then her shoulders straightened even more. “I don’t get it. Why didn’t you tell me you were a single dad?”
Where to start? “It isn’t relevant to us.”
“Relevant?” Her brows shot to her hairline. “This is a small town, Scott. Did you really think you could just hide your child away?”
She’s an embarrassment. Margaret’s words burned him and he slammed his fist on the bar. “Hell no. I didn’t tell you about Lily because you’re never going to meet her.”
She stared at him as if she didn’t recognize him and then she gulped down the whiskey and stood up, clutching her purse close to her body. “Thank you for making it perfectly clear that I’m good enough to screw when the need hits, but I’m not worthy enough to meet your daughter. Goodbye, Scott.”
Fuck! He heard the pain in her voice—pain he knew he’d put there. All the reasons he’d known so clearly as to why he should never have given in to the chemistry that swirled between them came home to roost.
“Melissa, wait.”
She kept walking. He strode out from behind the bar and caught her arm. “I’m sorry. It’s complicated, is al
l.”
She stood perfectly still, her shoulders rigid, but she didn’t turn around or say a word.
This was his worst nightmare. This was why he hadn’t mentioned Lily. “Lily’s special.”
She turned around and her mouth, which that morning had kissed him so thoroughly, was now rigidly tight. “All children are special, Scott.”
He sucked in a breath and spoke the words that always hurt. “Lily’s got Down syndrome.”
He watched for the expected judgment, distaste and pity to shine in her eyes but instead he got speared by blue-and-silver anger.
“You really don’t think very much of me, do you? What did you think I was going to do if I ever ran into the two of you on the street? Cross to the other side?”
Weariness flooded him and he sighed. “This isn’t about you, Melissa. This is about Lily.”
Scott’s quiet words, heavy with resignation and grief, shattered Melissa’s anger like a hammer against china. “I get that you’re protecting her but I would have liked to have known she existed.”
His jaw jutted and he brought his fingers up to make quotation marks. “‘Definitely no relationship’ were your words, remember?”
“Yes, of course I remember, but, God, she’s your child. A huge part of your life. Even if I never meet her, don’t you want to talk about her? I mean, if I had a kid I think I’d be boring everyone stupid with stories.”
He closed his eyes for a brief moment. “It’s not quite the same when your beautiful little girl doesn’t fit neatly into the normal bragging box. When I get excited that she built a four-block tower, it usually evokes sympathy not celebration.”
She realized that some of the lines around his eyes had been put there by sorrow and heartache. “Next time she does something you want to celebrate, tell me. I’ll high-five it.”
He stared at her as if he didn’t recognize her and then he quickly pushed his glasses up to the bridge of his nose. “I have to get home and relieve the babysitter.”
He sounded isolated and tired and she didn’t want him to go home alone. “I’ll walk with you.”
He rolled his eyes. “In those shoes?”
She opened her purse and pulled out ballet flats, quickly exchanging them for her heels.
He ran his hand through his hair. “I won’t be inviting you in, Melissa.”
The fact he’d used her full name underlined how serious he was. “I don’t expect you to, but it’s a clear, crisp night out and I can do with a walk to blow away the head of steam I’ve worked up over the day.”
“How did you find out?”
“It was an accident. Nicole was dropping off Max’s lunch and I was waiting in the car when I saw you come out of the preschool.”
He flicked off the lights and opened the door for her. “Lily’s five.”
She walked past him, catching the scent of beer and laundry powder. “Pretty name.”
“I think so.” He locked the door behind them. “Nancy thought she’d do better in kindergarten if she took an extra year in preschool.”
The moon shone on the dewy sidewalk. “Sounds sensible.”
There was so much she wanted to know, like who and where was Lily’s mother and how long had he been doing this sole parenting gig, but she knew enough that if she peppered him with questions, he’d tighten up faster than a Maine clam. She let the silence continue even though it almost killed her.
He broke it as they turned into his street. “How’s your piano practice going?”
“I’ve been playing straight after breakfast each morning, only today I was interrupted.” She elbowed him playfully in the ribs.
He elbowed her back. “You need to get your priorities sorted out if you want to reach your goal.”
“I promise I’ll practice as soon as I get home tonight.”
“Or in the morning.” He shoved his hands in his pockets. “I’m guessing our deal is off?”
Disappointment rolled her gut. “I’m sorry I got all bent out of shape. It was mostly the idea of you still being married that did my head in.”
“Yeah.” He rocked back and forth on his heels. “I can see how that would be a sticking point but I promise you, there’s nothing else. What you see is me. Divorced classical pianist, music teacher and bartender, Lily’s dad and home renter.”
Excess baggage in every shape and form. The sort of baggage that had destroyed her sister’s marriage. She clearly pictured the massive line of red Xs marked in every box on her list, but then again, she’d known that from the start.
She met his gaze and the moonlight cast shadows on his face, only not all of them were caused by the moon. Some were always there and now she knew why. It accounted for his mostly serious demeanor.
Except when he’s flirting with you. Except when he’s in bed with you. He was the single dad of a special-needs child. Fun probably didn’t feature that much in his life. And even though he wasn’t the guy for her, he was a great lover and after her self-imposed celibacy since the new year, she wasn’t about to walk away from it just yet.
“Up until I bit your head off were you having fun?”
He brought his hand up to her cheek. “The most fun I’ve had in a very long time.”
She smiled at him, oddly glad that she lightened his load in some small way. “As long as we’re both really clear on what we want and what we don’t want, I can’t see any harm in keeping the deal on the table.”
She turned her mouth into his hand and flicked her tongue out, drawing a wet and lazy circle on his palm.
He groaned and she grinned, stepping quickly away from him. “Sleep well, Scottie.”
“Very funny, Missy.”
“See you around.”
He pulled her back in against him. “See you in the morning?”
“Yes, please.”
Chapter Fifteen
“I wonder if all Australian young men are as thoughtful as Ben,” Ella said to Al as they waited by the truck. “If I was thirty years younger...”
They’d spent the afternoon at the quilt and car fair and now Ben had gone to find Lisa and Todd so they could head back to Whitetail.
Al crossed his arms. “You wouldn’t have given him a second glance because he rides a bike and they’re far too dangerous for you.”
She crossed her arms right back at him. “I can’t believe you’re still going on about that, Al Swenson.”
“I can’t believe you won’t even give it a try. I’ve ridden it every day this week without incident, just like the last forty years.”
“I know you’ve ridden it,” she said testily, thinking of how the noise had woken her up with a start every morning, making her heart race and leaving her feeling both alive and terrified all at the same time. “Exactly why you feel the need to kick-start it outside of my house escapes me.”
“Just giving you the chance to change your mind.”
“That’s not going to happen anytime soon,” she said, waving to Ben who was walking back with Amy’s parents.
“So we’re good to go, eh?” Al asked, opening the truck doors.
They all piled in and the men started talking engines, each one of them as enthusiastic as the other as they waxed lyrical about the simplicity of the Model Ts. She’d noticed it was the only time Todd seemed warm toward Ben.
She caught Lisa’s eye. “I have to hand it to Hayward. The organizers sure knew what they were doing staging the quilt show at the same time as the vintage car fair. They got double the attendance because of it.”
Lisa laughed. “That’s true. I know it made me want to get out my quilt board again and do some fussy cutting.”
Ella nodded, thinking the same thing. “I’ve been so busy with wedding cakes I haven’t done any quilting in a long time. Did Amy get her sewi
ng talent from you?”
Lisa looked surprised. “I suppose but she hasn’t sewn anything in years.”
“But she’s—”
“My mother’s a keen quilter,” Ben offered up, suddenly breaking away from the engine conversation. “Although today she would have been torn between going to see the quilts or the cars. She met Dad when her Beetle ran out of petrol...gas...and she’d forgotten to close off the emergency tank. He gave her a ride on the back of his motorbike and they’ve been together ever since.”
“See, Ella, some women ride bikes, eh?” Al said pointedly, his eyes finding hers in the rearview mirror.
Ella pursed her lips. “I imagine Ben’s mother wasn’t in her sixties.”
“She is now,” Ben said cheerfully. “She and Dad have graduated to a Gold Wing, which is really luxurious and my brothers and I give them heaps because it’s not a Harley. Dad just laughs and says he and Mum are growing old disgracefully and busy spending our inheritance. I think it’s great.”
“Actually, Todd and I bought a motorcycle this summer,” Lisa said with a quiet smile.
Ella didn’t understand the attraction at all. “Why?”
Todd chimed in to the conversation. “We had our kids pretty young so we’re catching up on the things we didn’t do in our twenties.”
“You can borrow Red if you like,” Ben offered, adding at Lisa’s confused expression, “my vintage Harley.”
“Weather’s looking good for the next few days. Maybe we could take the rustic road up by Lost Lake, eh?” Al suggested. “It’s a real pretty ride with the fall colors, and I’ve seen wolf packs up there.”
“Oh, I’d love that,” Lisa said, leaning forward enthusiastically and putting her hand on Todd’s shoulder.
Todd turned around to face the backseat, giving Ben a quizzical look. “Are you certain you’re okay with us riding your bike?”
Ben tapped his slinged arm. “Someone should be riding her. I’ll run through the whole kick-start process but apart from that the only other thing you need to know is she’s thunderously noisy so I’m not sure you’ll see any wolves.”
