by Holly Hood
“Just got back from the mall. How are you?”
“Good, everything is good. And you, Mr. Cardwell?” he asked my dad, bending down a little to see him.
“I’m great Evan, thanks for asking. Are you staying for supper?”
Evan looked at me for approval. I rolled my eyes.
“Actually, I was thinking about taking Eve out for dinner,” he said, totally understanding me.
“Too bad,” Gray said, walking to the other side of the car.
Evan nodded at him, staring him down. I knew so much more now than I did then, and it amused me even more to know that I knew Evan was capable of way more than Gray could imagine or stand up against.
Evan leaned into the hood to look it over as well, his hands running along the mustang. He always tried his hardest to get along with my dad. He said the more my dad trusted him, the more he would be able to see me with no problem. It was more of a tactic though because I think even he was growing bored with my family.
His hair was messy as usual, his clothes tidy. He always was so nice looking even with that casual way he had about himself. He didn’t have to try hard to look good, his looks were just gorgeous. And every time I seen him I grew more enthralled with everything about him.
I came up behind him, tugging at his back pocket, his wallet there as usual. I fiddled with it, pulling it almost out. He swatted at me. I waited about two seconds before he was following behind me up the porch and into the kitchen- he had to say hello to my mother or she would be offended.
“Hello Kay,” Evan said, hugging her briefly. My mother’s small frame seemed to disappear beneath his massive body. She patted him hard on the back, and then went right back to chopping.
“It’s always nice to see you Evan.” She glanced at me as she said this to let me know that she had used the proper name.
“I’m making salad with dinner. Is there anything you don’t like in yours?”
“Oh, thanks, but I was wondering if you cared if me and Eve went out to eat. I sort of wanted to take her out tonight,” he said so sweetly that I don’t think anyone’s mother would have objected. He shot me a smirk from behind her. I blew him a kiss. He was my hero.
“Oh, for any particular reason?” my mother asked in awe.
“A little celebration. Got a promotion at work.”
She nodded, smiling at the both of us. “Alright, you have fun. And congratulations.”
We headed out to his truck. I was pleased I had gotten out of there so easily.
“Are we really going out to eat?” I asked him, looking in his visor mirror.
“Anything you want to do,” he said, speeding down the main road into town.
“I don’t want to eat. Let’s just go somewhere quiet.”
“My house?” He rumbled over the road, the road bumping us as we barreled past people standing on the street. They were blurs, nothing but meaningless people to me. All that mattered at that moment was us.
“That’s fine with me. I just want to relax.”
“For such a young person you sure want to relax a lot. Why is that?” he asked me, taking my hand in his, his fingers interlocked mine and he squeezed them gently.
“I don’t know. I got so used to the chaos that I think it just made me want to remain slow. My parents have always been constantly going my whole life.”
“Remain slow.” He always repeated my words. It was sort of funny, like I was a foreigner or something and my English was off to him.
“Yeah, as kids we had a nanny, like, almost all day long. My parents were hardly ever home.”
“How did that make you feel?”
“Honestly? Severely emotional. I was always miserable and crying when I was a kid. Then I figured out, no matter what I acted like, it didn’t matter. So I gave up on hoping they would change. And the greatest surprise….”
“What’s that?” he asked, dropping my hand as he pulled into his driveway.
“They never did.” I opened my door, giving him a glance before hopping out. Evan’s face was puzzled. My mood was starting to become a little dark- I never liked to discuss my family. I barely did that with Vanessa. It was a great deal to wrap your head around.
Inside his maintained and orderly house, he tossed his keys on the table in the foyer as usual and headed in the kitchen. I set my jacket on the arm of the couch.
“So, now that we are alone, are you thirsty? Hungry?” He opened his fridge, staring in at an array of things.
“Not really,” I said, heading to the living room.
“What?”
“Nothing, I’m fine.” I plopped down on his couch bringing my bare feet up on the cushion. Evan sat down as well. He took a sip of his bottled water then set it on the glass table.
“Okay, good. What’s the greatest or biggest thing that ever happened to you? I know it seems strange to ask something like that out of the blue, but sometimes you get the best stories.”
I rubbed my forehead, feeling horribly flustered. I bit my lip staring at him. Was there anything he wasn’t afraid to ask me?
“What is it you want me to tell you?”
“Whatever you want.” He leaned back on the couch, hands behind his head, staring at me with an amused grin. I wasn’t feeling too amused.
“I had another brother,” I said, staring down at my toes. This wasn’t something I liked to share with just anyone, but I thought by chance it would make him shut up.
“Older or younger?”
“Older than me, younger then Gray. His name was Marcus. He was a lot like me, hardheaded and didn’t want to be anything like our family. He had it all mapped out for himself. But I guess you can’t always be sure you will get to that place you’re striving to get to.”
“What do you mean? What did he want to do?”
“He planned on just taking off after he graduated, traveling all over the place. Like a rolling stone or something. He wanted to be free, do what he wanted.”
“That’s a great attitude to have. Sounds like an awesome person.” He stared at me. I could tell from his face that he was getting a little nervous. He wasn’t sure what was coming next.
“He was the best. He, out of anyone, could have done it, too.” I laughed, remembering my brother, Marcus, with his toothy grin, wavy hair… those green eyes.
“He was always laughing and bounding around. Thinking always thinking. He had a huge heart. He cared about us. He told me every day that, no matter what, I always had him. But he was cheated out of keeping his promise to me, and a little part of me hated him and the world for that. But I kept my feelings hidden. I hid them for fear my mother would throw me into more therapy sessions.”
“Why didn’t he,” he asked, sitting up and putting his arm around me.
I shrugged. “You haven’t lived here long enough to have heard about it. My brother worked at a carry out farther out past Denver. These young kids came in there to rob the place. He was working with a girl and they pulled guns, shot them both in their heads. He survived for a bit. We got to come up to the hospital and see him, but he was barely awake, or there, I don’t know. His heart stopped, like, ten minutes or so after we all got there.”
Evan pulled me to him. I didn’t cry. I was tired of crying about the heartless kids that now sat in jail. How I believed that them serving twenty something years for murdering my brother wasn’t good enough. I had cried so much and it didn’t change a thing. I gave up.
Marcus wanted to be with us and now all I had left was just bitter memories. Sometimes I thought about how, even if he were here, he would be gone traveling, so, either way, I wouldn’t have him.
“I’m really sorry, Eve,” Evan said, rubbing my arm, trying to make me feel better.
“Don’t be, you didn’t do it. You don’t say sorry for something you didn’t do. I don’t like sorry,” I insisted, leaning my head on his chest.
“No, but I do apologize. You don’t have your brother- probably a brother that was better than Gray.” He mumbled the last part
under his breath.
“Yeah he was a lot better. Tell me something about you now.”
“Okay, see this scar?” He pulled me off him and lifted his shirt. There was a large mark right below his bellybutton and a scar, one that seemed almost like a burn or something, and the other like an old wound of some sort. I touched the scar. It wasn’t smooth like the rest of his skin.
“Wow, pretty gnarly. You have a great battle story to go with it?”
“I never told you I met my real dad when I lived with my mom. Well, my replacement mom. He came to see me when I was like, five. Took me out on his bike. No helmet or anything. He was plastered and we crashed into a ravine. I don’t really recall everything, I just know that I skidded on my stomach.”
“Wow, you’re lucky to be alive.”
He nodded. “Yeah that’s not all. Once we crashed, he tried to drown me.” He laughed a nervous laugh, pulling his shirt down.
I pulled it back up, touching the scar again, and then looked up at him. “You were one tough kid. Your bastard dad couldn’t even kill you as a five year old. That’s truly amazing.” We laughed.
“I just never could figure out why a man would want to drown his own kid. I mean, Donna said he was like, eighteen or something when I was five, so that would have made him way young. But still I could never hurt my own kid.”
He put his hand over mine on his stomach. I kissed his hand and nestled my head back into his chest.
“Your scar makes you who you are. I really don’t have any, but I think yours is super cool.”
Chapter 10
Stumble
It was so dark outside of Evan’s house. I stayed close to him as the wind howled and the rain beat against the windows. Evan was asleep snoring lightly, his chest rising and falling. I listened to the clock tick until it became so rhythmic I started to doze off myself. I kept fighting it because I wasn’t sure I wanted to stay. I hadn’t told my parents I was not coming home, nor would they appreciate me being out this long with Evan.
My phone buzzed in my pocket, which was between Evan’s body and me. He jolted up, giving a small groan. I flipped the phone open, the light blinding me in the darkness.
“Hello?” I whispered into the phone. Evan cleared his throat sitting up even more, I tried to stay leaning against him but he moved me off of him getting up.
“Eve, it’s Gray. Mom and Dad are locking up and want to know where you are.” He more stated this than talked to me like a human being.
“I’m over Evan’s. He fell asleep. It’s late so …I, uh, just think I’ll sleep on his couch and come home tomorrow.”
“You’re not coming home? Are you nuts?” he asked me, scoffing into the phone.
“No, it’s a long drive to expect someone to make when they’re half asleep.”
“Yeah, well, maybe he should have thought about that before he had you out so long.”
“Well maybe you should just respect my choice and leave me be Gray,” I snapped, punching Evan’s couch pillow.
Evan came up grabbing my phone in the blink of an eye. I jumped almost out of my skin as he flew out of the darkness at me like a bat out of hell. I grabbed his arm, but he batted me away.
“I can bring her back, it’s not a problem, but I think she just told you that she doesn’t want to come back there. So, yeah, if I bring her back how about you are on the porch when I get there…Why? Because you have beyond gotten under my skin….Yeah. Yeah….Alright see ya.” He snapped my phone shut tossing it on the couch next to my leg and sat down.
“What was that?” I asked, annoyed at his manly pushiness.
“It was me getting really irritated with your brother,” he snapped.
“Geez,” I said, curling up on the couch. Evan laid down wrapping his arms around me, his body pressing against my back.
“I don’t like it. He doesn’t need to treat you like that.” He kissed the back of my head.
“He is just a moron.”
“It won’t end well for him is all I’m saying,” he sighed, probably realizing that it meant more than he realized.
“Goodnight, Evan.” I fell asleep.
Loud banging startled me awake. Evan was nowhere to be found, at least around me. I sat up in the dark- apparently it was still night. Half asleep, I held onto the wall stumbling to find my way through the house. There was a light coming from a doorway. I made my way, eyes adjusting slowly, and turned the knob.
“Please, Evan,” an older man pleaded on his knees.
Evan stood in front of the fellow with a look of blankness on his face. Another guy around the same age as Evan with dark hair and blue eyes, stood there casually. My arms erupted in a million goose bumps. The door was barely open, but all three of them seemed to notice my presence and stopped what they were doing.
Evan stormed forward, yanking the doorknob from my hand. I stood frozen, my hand suspended in midair, staring into his wide eyes.
“What are you doing awake?” he asked, somewhat startled.
I stared past him at the older man in a suit still kneeling on the floor. The man didn’t look back at me, just stared at the ground, his face cut and bloody. His shirt was ripped at the collar and one of his black shoes was missing.
“I heard a noise, it woke me up. Is everything alright?”
“Eve, its fine,” he said, stepping out and pulling the door shut behind him.
“Who is that man and why is he bleeding?” I demanded.
“He works for my dad. It’s a whole lot of nothing and I am sorry you had to see this.” He grabbed my arm.
“You’re not going to…you know?”
Evan laughed at me pulling me back down the hall. He opened another door and brought me inside the room.
“Come here,” he said, motioning with his finger. I stared at him for a beat, searching for something, but I wasn’t sure what- a hint of crazed behavior maybe.
“What?” I said, slowly walking up to him. He pulled me to him drawing my face up to his; I stood on my tiptoes to reach his lips. His lips were warm, his kisses so soft they made my heart skip beats. It was a thrilling feeling even if I wasn’t sure what was going on.
“This is my bedroom, you can sleep in here. It’s more comfortable. And I’ll be back.”
I grabbed a hold of his belt buckle not letting him go. “Kiss me again and don’t go.” He very much obliged backing me up against his bedroom wall- my head hit with a soft thud. He ran his hand along my face, down my neck and to my chest stopping before he got too touchy.
“I got to. I’ll come back, though, and we can fall asleep together, promise.” He kissed my forehead before heading out of the bedroom.
I crawled into the huge bed with its down comforter and snuggled against all the big fluffy pillows. It was one of the most comfortable beds ever.
Evan blew my mind with his stern behavior, but at the same time, he was so hard to take my mind off of because he was just so good looking and charming. I didn’t know if things would get physical, it was never something I thought about that hard. I knew that maybe one day it would happen, but I wasn’t thinking too much on it. I don’t think he was either. He seemed to be the sort of guy who could wait it out, and he had a great deal of patience.
I stared at the ceiling. I couldn’t see it, but I stared anyway. It was hard to fall asleep when you were unaware of what was going on in the room next to you. The thought of what might be going on was thrilling and scary all at once. I was never one to like power, but in the back of everyone’s mind, you secretly wouldn’t mind having some at one point or another. To be able to make things the way you wanted them would be was an amazing thing.
A lot of people don’t want to be perceived as a heartless, uncaring person, but if you could have your way and you could physically threaten those around you to get what you wanted and it would work, it would be an amazing thing. I was a young girl who hadn’t always gotten her way and this sort of style or way of doing things seemed appealing to me. It was no
thing like I had ever known.
I imagined if things turned out well that I would be brought into the family and I would know all the truths and I would be just as valuable to them as anyone else. I secretly liked the thought of that. Maybe power was the key to all my problems, a simple solution. It must have been enough for Evan to stay with a family who wasn’t even his. Somewhere in him was a person that enjoyed the dangers and excitement of it all. Or maybe not. It was hard to say. Maybe he had been brainwashed all these years into feeling it was right.
Power was the one thing that I lacked. Power to change the way I felt about my family and my life. If I wanted out, I needed a good reason to change the way things were. It was a complicated thing; most people would see my life as a great wholesome family who cared about each other. I didn’t because I lived it and knew the truths behind it. I knew things that would make them think twice about it all.
