by Holly Hood
Life sometimes seems simple when you’re on the outside looking in. I was watching two young guys battling the most dysfunctional thing anyone could ever imagine, and I probably didn’t even know the half of it. Maybe Kenny was so messed up because of this family.
“I told you no, and I hope you respect my wishes,” Evan said, crossing the room and coming into the kitchen with me. He sighed, resting his hands on the counter and hanging his head.
Kenny watched me coming closer. “He is a good person Eve, but we have been through some messed up things. I killed a kid for that man, a little snot-nosed kid.”
“Kenny, she doesn’t need to know this,” Evan said.
I didn’t react; I just stared at Kenny in awe, waiting for him to say more.
“She wants to be with you so why not tell her everything? Evan worries about Tony offing us if we go seek something out for ourselves. But did he tell you that he usually offs you anyways at a certain point in your life?”
I gasped; Evan tossed a glass at Kenny.
“Evan, stop. If that is true, why do you care so much about what he is trying to do?!” I said breathlessly.
“It’s not true.”
“It’s not?” Kenny asked him. “Doug, Jon, Seth, Morgan. I could name about five more. Where they at?”
Evan shook his head. “I got his word that it wouldn’t turn out that way and I am going to believe him. As long as I am doing what I should be, I am not going to worry about it.”
“Well, you know what? I got that same word. I’m not waiting to see if he holds up his end of the bargain. I’m out.”
He slammed the door, tires squealing moments later as he sped away.
Evan flung another glass across the kitchen. I flinched at the noise and his behavior. I touched his arm, he pulled away.
“Stop. Really, calm down. Is he stupid enough to really do all that he says?”
“Absolutely.”
“Well you’re not involved, so why do you think it would affect you?”
“I’m his keeper. I live with him. We are brothers. That’s the way things work. I should have known and acted in accordance. Blah, blah, blah.” He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket, flipping it open and staring at it.
“Are you really going to call your dad and tell on him?” I scoffed, getting irritated.
“What other choice do I have?”
“Let it be. If you have so much trust in your so called dad, then trust he won’t punish you for Kenny screwing up. And let Kenny get a chance to do something he wants.”
“Why, because you feel for him?” Evan asked. “Because you see that this is a messed up situation finally?” he snapped, shaking his head in disbelief.
“Yes, because one person should not be allowed to dictate everyone else for frivolous reasons. And you’re okay with him doing that. And I don’t care if he thinks he can just because he is your father!” I screamed in his face.
“Well, I’m glad you don’t care!” he screamed back.
This was a side I hadn’t seen and that I didn’t think even existed. I wasn’t backing down, no matter what he said. I cared about the Evan I knew, monster or not, he needed someone to tell him when he was wrong. That’s what I would want someone to do if I needed it.
“You can be mad at me, but I think you’re looking at this all wrong. You’re letting your dad hold your life in his hands. You’re letting him tell you to commit crimes and murder and you’re okay with that! Would you kill me if he said to?” I asked him. His face softened. “Would you?!” I yelled at him again, hitting him in the chest to make him speak.
He looked at me in disbelief turning away from me. “I don’t need to worry about that because that would never happen.”
“Just like Kenny probably never thought he would ever kill a kid because he thought that would never happen?” I asked, sickened. “It’s all good. Just do me a favor when you do have to kill me. Could you make it peaceful?” I hurled the words at him, his body seemed to react.
“I am not going to kill you. He isn’t going to ask, and I really wish you would watch how you talk about him to me,” he said, staring at me in sheer agitation.
“I’m glad one of us is so confident. Because to me, I think he thinks I am a pawn, and as long as I do what he wants, he is alright for the moment. Do you know he told me he wanted me to make you happy and be with you? Or is that part of all of this and you already knew?”
“No, I didn’t. And no, it’s not. I am here with you because I want to be. My dad, he just sees what I see. That we are good together.”
I was beginning to feel he was brainwashed and I was starting to get a clear view at how sick of a person Tony was.
“Is there anything else you want to share with me?” I asked him, picking up a stray piece of shattered glass near my foot.
“This whole thing is bigger than you know. It’s not dishonesty, it’s just hard to imagine,” he mumbled, practically in a zombie-like state.
“What are you even talking about? I swear to you Evan, just open your mouth and spit it out already!” I yelled. I was getting so tired of trying to understand something that seemed to have so many different angles.
“Do you believe in higher beings,” he asked me, his eyes becoming more alert.
“Like what, God or something?”
“Yeah, like God or Satan? Or if there is one, how is all of this running,” he said.
“I’ve been to church. I’ve heard the bible. Doesn’t mean I have an exact answer to what it all means or how it all works,” I said, staring at him.
“Okay. Well, if there is a God and there is a Satan, then how are all these people getting to where they need to be?”
I half laughed at him for asking me this. “Now is not the time for philosophy.” I crossed my arms, becoming uncomfortable.
“I’m not trying to philosophize with you! I’m trying to explain what Tony, my father, is!” he yelled, slamming his fist down on the counter, glaring at me, his face going pale.
“What is he?” I asked quietly.
“Who do you think gets all that done around here?” he asked. “And maybe it doesn’t make that much sense to you or anyone, but I’ve explained this already to you in the past. But what Tony is doing is not the Mob; it’s a process of elimination. It’s a way of life. It’s all a big cover for something so much bigger going on underneath everyone’s noses.
“Tony is no different than any of us who help do all of this. It’s just what is meant to be. Kenny may not understand as well as I do, but even if I am tired. I can’t quit because that’s what I’m here for.” He kept on talking, spilling his words all over the place. I sat there, stunned, listening to something I never in a million years would have believed if I wasn’t there for it.
“It’s not a matter of him so called offing us. It’s a matter of us doing what is right when it’s right, and if we don’t, it’s Tony’s job to get rid of the bad.” He sat down on the barstool.
“I guess the only way I can explain this to you is think of it as a Grim Reaper. You know, like in the movies, the guy with the dark cloak and the scythe? Well that’s what all of this is about, and that’s what we are. It may not be explainable, but we are the unimagined people that everyone always wonders about. They walk on Earth just like everyone else.”
It’s one thing to believe what someone tells you, and it’s another to process it and move on. I was moving on but I was feeling like I was no longer there. My body felt as if it was there, my being above it floating, maybe in shock, I don’t know. It’s something unexplainable.
“So are you human?” was all I could think to say?
“Basically, yes, I am. I’m stronger than most humans. My soul is different.”
“What does that mean?”
“I really don’t know. I never understood. Creation of you took place between two human beings. Creation of me took place between two, um, marked humans.”
This was all so complex my head hurt. �
��You can die like me?” I asked.
“I guess you could say I live. It’s basically like being dead now. If I died it would be like I live for the first time. No one really dies.”
I held my head in my hands. Evan came over to me. Holding my hands, he looked me in the eyes. “Do you have faith in me Eve?” he asked, searching my eyes for answers.
“Yes.”
“Then all I need you to do is trust in me and that I will do the right thing for you.”
Chapter 16
Unexpected Guest
In the morning, I lay staring at Evan while he slept. I didn’t move a muscle; I didn’t want to wake him. Last night was very stressful and he was dealing with a great deal. He still did not know what to do about Kenny. And Kenny never came home, Evan waited up late calling Kenny’s phone again. He told me at one point, if he wasn’t there by morning, the only reasonable thing to do was to tell Tony. He said that even if Tony didn’t punish him for the mess up, it was still very bad for Kenny.
He explained to me how, although it seemed like a money based business, this was just code for the truth, and the truth was they were given names and it was their job to go and create the situation for this person’s life to be over. There was no way to stop them, and that is why the fear of the law would never change what they had going on. He said the world saw them as a bad thing and tried to punish them for something, but they would never get anything to stick because it was the way of the world.
I had a million thoughts in my head as he told me all this last night; I wanted to know so much. Things like, did they know when each and every one of us were set to expire? Did he know when it would be my time? And Marcus. Was Marcus taken away from us because of the way things just naturally worked, or did someone decide they had so much hate that they wanted to kill my brother? It was just so much to try to understand. But I wanted to.
I didn’t see Evan as a bad person anymore. I saw him as almost an Angel of Death who didn’t want to be the way he was but it was just his destiny. He was a truly caring person, and he cared about me. I didn’t even know how much of our relationship was real to him and how much was just a ploy. I hoped it meant as much to him as it did to me.
Staring at his face, he looked peaceful. I could only imagine what was going on inside his head. I touched his cheek, his skin was warm. He moved a little, his eyes still closed. The house was quiet, not a sound. I hadn’t even seen Ari. I sighed to myself. Things were going in the wrong direction.
Evan finally opened his eyes, looking around the room. “Have you seen Kenny?” he asked me, sitting up, still half asleep.
“No, still nothing,” I said, getting up myself. I followed him out of the bedroom, curious to see what was next. He dialed a number, waiting, and then shutting his phone. His face was back to the same troubled look he’d had before bed.
“He’s still not answering.” He bit his lip, staring off.
“Have you tried calling Ari?” I offered.
“Yeah, I called her a few times last night. I can try her again. I got a feeling she won’t know anything even if I did get a hold of her.” He dialed the phone again, waiting. Nothing.
“What are you going to do?” I asked.
There was a loud wrapping on the door. I jumped. Evan walked over, peering out the peep hole. He turned the lock real slow so to not make any noise.
Turning to face me, he brought his finger to his lips. “Stay where you are,” he whispered.
The sides of the door were glass so whoever it was at the door only had to peer through to get a glimpse into the house. Evan walked a straight line away from the door. I kept my eyes fixed on the glass waiting to see a face. The knocking continued. Evan made his way to me, grabbing my arm. He moved into the hallway toward his bedroom.
“What who is it?” I asked, feeling scared.
“My dad’s people. They’re here for Kenny, I know it. He probably didn’t show up.” Evan crossed the room and began nervously pacing, biting his fingernail.
“Can’t we just answer and tell them we haven’t seen him?”
“I really don’t think that is a good idea.”
“Well, don’t they know you’re here? Your car is right outside,” I said, starting to panic. Evan sighed, heading back out. I followed behind him.
“Eve stay in the bedroom, I can handle it,” he said quickly.
“No. I want to make sure you’re okay.”
He didn’t have time to argue. “Hold on a sec!” he yelled, pausing, doorknob in hand before he opened it up.
Two large men stood at the door, their faces completely emotionless. Dressed in regular clothes and looking a little rough around the edges, they didn’t look out of the ordinary. The first man was equal to Evan in size, slicked back black hair, with stubble on his face. The other man a little more round, was bald with no facial hair whatsoever.
They came in without an invitation, standing (more like looming) in the room. They looked around the house and then to me, sizing me up from the looks of it. I slipped into the kitchen, staying behind the counter.
“Where’s Kenny?” The one with the slicked hair asked Evan in a deep voice.
“I haven’t seen him since last night. He left. I’ve called his phone, no answer,” Evan belted out. The men were quiet, looking at Evan.
“Where is it you think we can find him?” the bald one asked, walking over to the hallway that led to the bedrooms. He looked down the hall for signs of anyone else and then came over to me, blocking the kitchen doorway. I moved back, feeling intimidated by his glare.
“Have you seen Kenny?” he asked me.
“I saw him last night. He hasn’t come back,” I stumbled, crossing my arms.
The man came closer to me, keeping his eyes locked on mine. He stopped nearly inches from me, reaching into his pocket. I looked down, hoping it wasn’t a gun and hoping it wasn’t time to die. He pulled out a pocket knife, flipping it open. Although it looked like a pocket knife, it was way sharper-its blade glistening in the light of the kitchen. My whole body tensed. I didn’t care to move for fear he would gut me right there.
“I’ve always thought of Evan as an honest kid. Is there anything you want to tell me?” he asked, studying his blade.
Evan seemed to notice instantly. His face became enraged. “Leave her alone!” he yelled. It didn’t seem to affect him at all.
The other guy grabbed a hold of Evan, stopping him from coming to my rescue. He pulled a gun, hitting Evan in the face. I screamed out in shock. Baldy seem to be a little more upset at this because next thing I knew he’d knocked me into the cupboards. I was no match for his strength and I hit with such a force, it knocked the wind out of me. I fell to the ground, crumpling in a ball. I didn’t care to see what was next.
I heard Evan tussling and fighting with all he had in him to get to me, but it was no good. Two men against just him was not going to work. I kept my eyes shut, waiting for gun shots or something. I didn’t think these guys even cared if they killed us or not. I prayed Ari or someone would come in at the right moment and scare them away. But if Tony sent them, it probably wouldn’t matter.
I pressed my palms against the floor, feeling the coolness, trying to get my mind away from what was going on. I kept still, afraid to lift my head to even look. I heard one of them tell the other to get his phone. Evan grunted and groaned.
“You, get up!!” He snatched me off the floor, dragging me across the room to stand a few feet from Evan. Evan was on his knees not being restrained anymore. I looked at him quickly and then away as the bald man brought his face close to mine.
“When you see Kenny, you give him our words,” he said, grabbing a hold of my hair so tight it felt like he was about to rip it out of my head.
Evan shot up off his knees, lunging for the bald guy. This time, the other man didn’t stop him. Evan gave one quick punch to the side of his head and he fell at my feet like a big bag of bones. I gasped, jumping back, tears streaming down my face. Eva
n grabbed me, smoothing my hair, pushing my head into his chest to shield me from everything.
“Get him out of here. If I see my brother I will be the first to mention it, believe me,” Evan said, holding me tightly with one arm.
“Look kid, I’m doing what I was told.” the big thug said. I turned to look at him. He eyed me nervously. I think now that he was the last one standing he didn’t feel so tough. I moved away from Evan, feeling furious. I wanted to get a good kick to the guy on the floor’s head. Evan grabbed my hand stopping me from entertaining that thought. He grabbed my waist, holding me close to him. I think he felt the anger. The man got the other one off the floor, heading to the door. We watched them head out before Evan let me go. I stood in my place quietly, just staring. Evan shut and locked the door hurrying back to me and he surveyed my face, head, back, all over. I swatted at him.
