by A. C. Arthur
She joined him in the living room a few minutes later. The fire was already blazing and he was about to walk across the room to the bar when she shook her head.
“I don’t need a drink for this discussion. But if you do, please help yourself.” She wore dark gray leggings now, with a pink shirt that hung off one shoulder and barely scraped the upper part of her thick thighs. She’d pulled her hair back into a ponytail and on her feet were fluffy pink socks that reminded him of cotton candy.
He decided to forego the drink and instead, moved to the couch where she’d just taken a seat. There were four couches in this room, abstract designed rugs on the wood-planked floor, glass end tables and crystal-based lamps. Myles sat less than three feet away from her on the same couch.
She began the conversation without preamble. “When we first met up in April and our circumstances changed the way they did, we discussed what this “thing” between us would look like.”
“We did.” Because Myles was all about rules—the ones he’d put in place in his life to be able to function as he did.
“We weren’t attached to each other in any way. I wasn’t your woman and you weren’t my man. We owed each other no explanations for any missed calls or unanswered texts. We accepted our attraction to each other and agreed on appeasing a physical need when it suited us.”
Somehow, he hadn’t recalled their agreement sounding so sterile, functional and rigid.
“Right after that you met someone else and started a more serious type of relationship and I respected that.” Now this guy’s name he remembered—Shad Henry.
She nodded and sat back against the pillows on the couch. “The next time we met up was when Shad and I were on a break.” She used her fingers to mimic air quotes as she said that last word.
“And we again appeased…fulfilled a need for each other.” He still didn’t like her words.
By June when they met for a weekend at Virginia Beach, Myles’s need to be inside her had morphed into an addiction, one he’d worked like hell to keep in check when she told him she was giving Shad another chance.
Gemma and Shad had taken a second “break” in October and she’d called Myles to meet her at a bed and breakfast in Alexandria. Never in all his life had Myles considered himself a man who’d be at a woman’s beck and call, but he’d gone because he’d missed her more than he cared to admit.
“I settled for all the bullshit lines Shad fed me throughout this past year. Every lie or half-truth, every brush off, all of it. Just like I did for the four years I was with Howie. But I’m done with all that now. I’ve had enough.” She turned so that she was now sitting sideways on the couch, one leg tucked under her butt, her hands in her lap as she looked up at him. “I’m not going to turn into some cynical man-basher, but I’m also not going to settle for anything less than what I need at this time in my life.”
“Gemma—”
“No.” She shook her head and interrupted him. “Let me finish.”
He nodded.
“I’m not asking for too much nor am I checking off some list in my mind making sure the man meets every last one of my criteria. But at the same time, I’m not putting my needs on the backburner any longer. I want to be married and have children one day. Family means everything to me. Period.”
Family meant everything to Myles as well. He just never thought about having one of his own.
“I want all the things that my mother couldn’t have because my father decided to sleep with a production assistant and the backlash of being in the spotlight put too much stress and distance between them for any hope of a reconciliation.”
Her voice hitched as she spoke of her parents and he wanted to reach out and touch her, console her for what he knew had been a tremendous loss for her. But he also knew that she needed to do this, she needed to speak her piece and the best thing he could do for her right now was to just listen.
“I like you, Myles.” She shook her head again and gave a half smile. “I like you a whole lot. I like how you can make me laugh when I’m feeling down, how you pamper me not because you’re trying to impress me, but just because it’s the way you are. I like hearing the sound of your voice when you call or waking up to see your good morning text messages because you’re such an early bird.”
He smiled then too because she always made jokes about how early he got up in the morning. She had no idea it was because he preferred being awake and busy.
“I like being in your arms and having you inside me. Man, I like that so much.”
They both chuckled, but she sobered quickly.
“But that’s not enough anymore. It’s not what I want this next year to be.”
“What do you want from me?” That hadn’t been what he’d contemplated saying and yet those were the words that just slipped out.
“I want more of a commitment. I want us to act like this is going somewhere other than the next weekend getaway for terrific sex. I want to see if there’s more to us than just “like”.”
She wanted what was impossible for him to give.
Five
He was taking too long to answer and Gemma knew what that meant.
“But if you’re not willing to give me, or rather us, that chance, it’s fine. I understand, you’re not built for relationships. That’s what you told me one night when we were on the phone and I admire you for owning your limitations and making them known. It’s just time for me to do the same.”
She’d started to move like she was going to get up from the couch when his hand on her arm stopped her.
“I admire you for knowing what you want,” he said when she looked over at him again. “I thought we were on one track and now you’re shifting directions.”
Remaining still she sighed. “I know it might seem abrupt to you, but these last couple of months have been a lot for me. I’ve done so much soul searching ‘til I think my ancestors have weighed in on the next steps I should take.” She chuckled wryly even though she had actually broken down one night and asked her mother for guidance. Still missing Olivia Taylor eleven years after her death, Gemma often called on the only woman she’d ever looked up to.
“I don’t have that many people I can discuss my next steps in life with.” Myles may have come from a large family, but more often than not he acted like a loner.
There’d been many times she’d felt sad for him after one of their conversations, sad for how all he basically talked about was work. Even when mentioning his family, it was always through the lens of his business or one of his other family member’s business. Never in terms of just spending time with the people he loved, even though she got the sense that he loved his parents and sisters very much.
“You’ve mentioned your sisters and your mother, don’t you talk to them? About something other than work, I mean?” she asked.
He hadn’t moved his hand from her arm, but now, he eased it down to take her hand, staring at her fingers as if it were the first time he’d seen them. Luckily, she’d gotten her nails done before making the trip to Temptation. The red and white snowflake design on every other nail was festive and appropriate considering the way the snow had picked up outside.
“I don’t talk about my personal life with them very much. Even though they’d love it if I did. Especially my mother and Cee-Cee, they’re always trying to hook me up with some woman they know.” He laced his fingers through hers.
“And they haven’t been successful yet? I find that hard to believe.” In fact, thinking back over the last year while she’d been very open about her dating life, Myles had never once told her about a woman he was seeing. “When’s the last time you were in a serious relationship with a woman?”
“When I was seventeen,” he said and then looked up at her as if he didn’t believe he’d said that aloud.
“Seventeen? You’re thirty-five now.” She couldn’t hide the incredulous tone in her voice, then she narrowed her gaze. “Are you being serious with me? Or are you just saying that
because you don’t really want to talk about this?”
He sighed. “I don’t really want to talk about this. I’ve found it much easier to live my life without muddying the waters with talk about emotions and commitments that aren’t business related.” When she attempted to ease her hand away from his, he held on to it tighter. “But I’m not lying to you. I would never lie to you, Gemma.”
The serious tone of his voice held her still. “Then it’s just me. You don’t want to try to have a serious relationship with me?”
He released her hand this time and stood. Clasping his hands behind his head he took a deep breath, exhaled and let his arms fall to his side. “To be honest, I don’t know why you’re thinking like this now.” He’d started walking toward the bar again but stopped and turned back to face her. “I mean, I do know sort of. You want the family you believe your mother was denied.”
She liked knowing that he actually listened to her. Shad hadn’t even been good at faking that part of their relationship.
“But at the same time, you’ve spent months in a dysfunctional situation, enduring one ridiculous scenario after the next with a guy who wasn’t good enough for you from the start.”
And Myles didn’t know the half of it. He had no idea that six weeks ago, Shad had her arrested for theft and vandalism. To be clear, she hadn’t stolen anything from the trifling bastard. She’d paid for those tags on his truck and after he’d put her out of said truck, leaving her stranded on the side of the road she’d decided he no longer deserved the privilege of driving around on her dime. After calling an Uber to take her home she’d gotten into her car and went back to his house. Once there she’d pulled out the pink toolbox she kept in her trunk and went to work removing the tags from the front and back of his truck. As for the vandalism, well, it wasn’t her fault he liked to smoke in the truck and left his windows cracked to air out the interior even when he was parked. The hose that was in his driveway had just been lying there as if in wait for her. If he hadn’t come to his front door shouting obscenities and threats at her, she probably would’ve kept it moving, but Shad never did have the good sense to shut his damn mouth. So she’d shoved that hose through the opening in the window and while he’d ducked back into the house to get his phone to call the police on her, she’d run back up the driveway to the side of the house and turned on the water.
It wasn’t until she was pulling off and spotted Shad’s ten-year-old daughter standing in the doorway looking confused that Gemma felt like a total idiot for letting a man take her to that point.
“And before that you were in another bad relationship,” Myles continued. “Why in the world would you want to put yourself through that again?”
She cleared her throat and stood. “Because my mother believed in love. And after a while, my father realized what he’d lost in her and wanted to find that love again, but it wasn’t meant to be. They both died after losing so much time not embracing what they had. I don’t want that for myself. I want the soul-searing love I see between Gray and Morgan, Garrek and Harper, and Gage and Ava. They’ve all found it and they’re living their best lives in the place where we were all born. I want that kind of happiness too.”
He closed the space between them. “So you want to move back to Temptation?”
She hadn’t said that, or she hadn’t thought she’d said it. That didn’t mean she hadn’t considered it, especially not after seeing how easy it had been for some of her siblings to go back to the town where it had all begun.
“I want to be on the path to finding my happy, Myles. Meeting you only when we both get the itch to sleep together is a dead end.”
He stuffed his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants and looked as if he didn’t know what to say next.
“But no worries,” she said. “I told you in the beginning that I’d let you know when this arrangement had run its course for me and I’m telling you now.” She stepped closer, lifting a hand to cup his cheek. “But first, I’d like to close out this year here at this lovely cabin.” Leaning in close, she touched her lips lightly to his. “I’d give anything to spend six more minutes with you.”
Six
Myles was certain he’d surpassed that six-minute mark two days ago and then again numerous times, including this morning before the sun had come up over the mountains. Now, hours later, he was standing near the door dressed in jeans, black Timberland boots, coat, hat and gloves, sweating his ass off while he waited for Gemma who’d insisted they didn’t have time for any sex play while they’d showered.
He grinned at the memory. She was completely uninhibited and immodest, moving freely around him whether she was naked or fully dressed. Goofing around with him as if they’d known each other for years, bringing out a side of him he hadn’t known existed. That last part was what really got him to thinking. None of this was something Myles had ever thought he’d be doing. Spending long weekends with a woman, sleeping in a bed beside her, waking up not only ready to slip his dick inside her warmth, but also to hear her voice, to see her smile. To learn something new about her and to marvel at how good all those things made him feel.
When a heavy weight formed in the center of his chest, he coughed it off. Then shook his arms and rolled his neck. If he couldn’t ignore the weird sensation, he’d physically shake it off.
“Okay, come on. I’m ready.”
He turned at the sound of her voice and paused just to look at her. He’d been doing that a lot in the days since they’d been at this cabin, just watching her move, doing really mundane things like operating the remote to the TV, taking a glass of water from the nightstand each morning so that she could take her birth control pill and the high blood pressure medication she’d been prescribed two years ago.
Today she wore black pants with dark gray snow boots laced tightly up her calf. Her coat was also gray, the white hat with what looked like the world’s largest snowball on top, matched her scarf and gloves. Her pretty face was free of make-up except for a light pink shine to her lips. The grin that spread across his face was simultaneously instinctual and what was fast becoming his natural reaction to seeing her.
“I’m going to show you the best frozen lake in the world. And then, if you’re good I’ll fix you a nice lunch when we return from our little excursion.” She moved past him as she talked, going to the door as if she hadn’t noticed him standing there like an awestruck goofball.
Following behind her Myles stepped out into the frigid December air, closing and locking the cabin door behind him.
“This is a great location,” she continued to talk as they walked down the front steps and she turned opposite the direction of the shoveled driveway. “It’s not too far from the heart of town so that people will feel like it’s a road trip to get here, but it’s just far enough that nothing impedes the grandeur of the resort and scenery.”
He fell into step beside her as their boots crunched over the new snow that had fallen yesterday. They’d been watching the news and weren’t at all shocked by the daily snowfall that was hitting the region. It was Virginia after all, not any of the warmer locations where they’d both lived before.
“How do you still know about this place? You left when you were seven.” He could just imagine how precocious and bossy a seven-year-old Gemma would’ve been.
“We had babysitters, or I guess your family might call them nannies. Anyway, they’d plan little outings for us during the times when the show wasn’t taping but our parents needed to be on hand doing adult things, I guess. In the winter we always came out this way because Ms. Belle said the snow was better out here. She was right.”
If by right she meant the amount of snow out here, then that was accurate. For as far as he could see there was snow covering what he knew were rolling hills beneath. The sky was heavy with clouds so the mountains he was certain were in the distance weren’t visible. “You sure you’re going the right way? I don’t see any lake.”
She looped her arm through his and pul
led him along. “Don’t doubt me, Mr. Donovan.” She chuckled as streams of smoke billowed from her lips.
He grinned too and shook his head. If there was one thing he knew for certain it was that he’d never doubt Gemma Taylor. Not her tenacity, her strength or her resilience. There was just no other way to explain how she’d gone through the tumultuous year of make ups and break ups with Shad, watched her brothers find the love and happiness she coveted, listened to him all but tell her he didn’t want anything more with her than sex, and still remain not only smiling, but in good spirits.
In the days since their conversation about the future, she’d been the exact same as she had any other time they’d been together. There was no attitude, no freeze out, no arguments. Myles was well aware of what it looked like when a woman was pissed off. He had sisters and during their teen years he’d been privy to more than one emotional blow up over some boy acting like an idiot or some girl who’d pissed them off because she was getting in the way of their pursuit of a boy, who eventually still acted like an idiot.
“See,” she said just as they walked through a group of trees.
His breath caught at the majestic sight. Tall trees with patches of white stuck to the sides, covering long thick and thin branches. The snow-covered ground broke off about twenty feet ahead into a perfectly round lake now covered with a sheen of gray-blue ice.
“This is amazing. It’s like something out of a movie.”
“I know, right.” She sighed and leaned into him. “We used to come here to ice skate. I don’t think the lake is completely frozen over yet. They usually have signs around here somewhere to let you know when it’s safe.
Myles didn’t see any signs, then again, he wasn’t looking for them. They weren’t equipped to go ice skating anyway. Still, just the sight of this magnificent piece of nature and the crisp tingle of wintry air moving through his nostrils filled him with a feeling of rejuvenation and newness that he couldn’t quite explain.
