Copyright © 2020 by Z. L. Arkadie
All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without written permission from the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.
ISBN: 978-1-952101-00-7
Created with Vellum
Contents
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Epilogue
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Chapter One
Penina Ross
Aunt Christine and I didn’t get around to buying those sugary and fatty coffees since we were determined to find my mother. We had dodged such a devastating bullet with the corpse in the morgue not being Mary, and we heeded the warning from on high. We couldn’t let my mom continue to remain missing. We needed to find her, and fast. I also desperately needed to find out who’d fathered me. So Aunt Christine drove us to the airport. After returning the rental car, she returned to Boston, and I was able to catch a four-thirty flight back to New Orleans.
As I waited for boarding, I tried to use my telephone to access the DNA company that had sent the results of my test. Unfortunately, I couldn’t remember my password for their website, and when I tried to reset it, my phone ran out of power. I searched through my purse, trying to find my power adapter, but closed it after remembering that I had packed the adapter in my luggage, which I had checked.
I wanted to scream as I wrung my hands in anguish. It felt as if I couldn’t buy a break, not even with a million bucks. Then boarding began, and that offered some relief as far as making me feel as if I was moving forward.
Soon I was settled in my seat while the airplane climbed the sky. I focused on the trees and muddy plots of water below. Then, out of the blue, words that had been stuck in my brain for many years revisited me.
Know thyself. Always try to be aware of who you are. It’s not going to be easy, but do it.
I finally remembered Christine had said that to me during one of our sit-downs when I was in medical school. Back then, I was ten times more exhausted than I was now. I was also perpetually depressed simply because of the demands of medical school. And missing my mother but not missing her at the same time compounded my misery. Those meals with my aunt were starting to reshape themselves in my mind. I was the one who was lethargic and barely present. She was empathetic to my state and allowed me to sit silently, be still, and just exist in her presence.
I hadn’t realized how widely I was smiling until I turned and met the gaze of another passenger. It was a man, and he was handsome and clearly interested. I ripped my eyes away from his and stared aimlessly out the window. It was too soon to start another relationship. I still didn’t know what was to come of Jake and me.
I wanted to throttle Jake because I disliked Gina so much. She hadn’t had to be so cruel and cold. She’d made me feel as if I meant nothing to Jake and could never mean anything to him. Also, and I so hoped it wasn’t true, we could be siblings. That thought made my heart feel as heavy as a boulder. Then I wondered whether the stranger’s flirtatious ogling was a sign that I should look elsewhere for love.
No way.
Perhaps.
Maybe one day.
I decided to avoid looking over at my fellow traveler even when the flight attendant served my coffee and honey-roasted peanuts. Mostly, I continued gazing out the window, trying to figure out how in the world would I ever be able to put space between Jake and me? Gazing at his face felt as familiar as looking at myself in the mirror. It was as if I’d been acquainted with all his curves, lines, and pores my whole life. Were we soulmates? Or was our connection sparked by a blood connection? I clutched my belly as the possibility of the latter made me sick to my stomach.
When the airplane landed, I was still wide awake, and thinking about Jake. The next day, I would report for my shift. When or if I saw Jake, I would know whether he was my brother or not. It was our row’s turn to exit, and the guy who’d been sneaking peeks at me all through the flight stood back to let me out before him.
“Thanks,” I said, smiling tightly but avoiding eye contact. I didn’t want to lead him on.
The guy continued giving me eye service in baggage claim as we waited for our luggage to roll along the conveyer belt. I felt as if I was standing there wasting time. I certainly could’ve packed lighter and just carried a weekender bag onto the plane, but I’d been in such a panic after I spoke to Christine about my mother that I felt as if I were going to some faraway place where reality didn’t exist. That was why I’d packed everything but the kitchen sink—and my computer, which I’d left at home by accident.
I had to admit it, though, I felt as if the whole world had been lifted off my shoulders, knowing my mom was still alive. I couldn’t say for certain that she was, but Christine had said she was going to hire a private investigator to try to find her. I gave her permission to use all the funds that were sent to her from the trust that was set up to pay restitution for everything my mom had been through.
Then Jake came to mind. I didn’t want to avoid him forever—maybe only a week or two. Then I wondered if I could continue engaging in sexual relations with my brother.
Hell no! My life wasn’t Game of Thrones, which happened to be one of the few shows I used to watch with any semblance of regularity. Asher Christmas being my brother would be a game changer. And the two of us perhaps being related almost made perfect sense. Maybe our electric, out-of-this-world, once-in-a-lifetime connection existed because we were family.
“Holy shit,” I groused as I almost missed my suitcase. I snatched it off the conveyer belt just in time not to have to chase it down.
“Do you need help with that?” the guy from our flight asked.
“She doesn’t need help. I got it.”
My body stiffened as my suitcase was carefully taken out of my hand. Then I turned around to see who the stranger was staring daggers at. “Jake?”
Or should I have said, “Asher”?
Chapter Two
Penina Ross
I almost refused to follow him to the car. First, I wasn’t sure I was ready to see him yet. Second, seeing his face brought back my anger in spades. But regardless of my tumultuous emotions, we rode in the back seat of his spacious, chauffeured car. The glass separating the front from the back was rolled up as we headed toward the city.
“How was your flight?” Jake asked.
That question made a lot of thoughts shuffle through my mind, so I said the one that beat out the others. “How did you know I was flying in?”
He hesitated then readjusted in his seat. “I have my resources.”
I quickly looked away from him. Holy shit, Pen, don’t look at his lips. Don’t want to kiss him. I’d also noticed how far away from me he was sitting. Suddenly, I knew exactly what I had to do—I had to accept that fello
wship in Boston. It was perfect timing. I’d never felt closer to my aunt. I wanted to continue nurturing a good and solid relationship with her. She could be the answer to my bouts with loneliness and hooking up with the wrong people to ease that feeling.
“What are you thinking?” Jake asked.
I wanted to turn and face him, but I didn’t have enough willpower to stop myself from being dazzled by his pale and intense blue eyes. “What should I call you?” I turned and cleared my throat. “Asher or Jake?”
“Jake.” He sounded sure about that.
“But your birth name is Asher Christmas.”
His eyebrows furrowed as his back seemed to hug the corner of the seat even tighter. I wasn’t going crazy—Jake was indeed shifting himself farther away from me. Then I realized that he certainly didn’t know about the possibility of us being siblings, so that wasn’t the reason he was putting distance between us. In his many messages to me, he’d debunked Gina’s claim that she was his girlfriend. Maybe they’d rekindled their bond while I was away. If that was so, I would be heartbroken, but perhaps it would be for the best.
“What else are you thinking, Penina?” Jake asked again, reading my strained expression.
I heaved a sigh. “Jake, I have something to tell you that would probably throw a monkey wrench in all this relationship business between us.”
His jaw flexed, and his eyes narrowed to slits. “Relationship business?”
“Well, you lied to me from day one, so ...”
“No, I didn’t,” he claimed. “I’ve confessed to you that I was hiding something. You allowed me to hold those secrets.”
“But you said your secret wouldn’t hurt me.”
His eyebrows drew even closer together. “Gina is not my girlfriend. I hadn’t seen her in six years.”
I vigorously shook my head. “Not that.” Suddenly, I felt the deep loss of Jake or Asher and what he could’ve meant to me for the rest of my life. “The thing is, you could be my brother.”
“I know,” he said, sighing.
My mouth fell open. “You do? How?”
He turned away to look out the window then glared at my face again.
“What?”
Jake reached into a pouch on the back of the driver’s seat. “Gina wrongfully went through your mail and opened this.” He handed me an envelope.
I pressed my back against the seat before taking it. “It’s my DNA results?”
“Yes.” He almost looked sick saying that.
“It’s not your fault that she opened my mail, Jake. So it’s okay.” My fingers were frantic as they took the contents out of the envelope. “But this was why I was in such a hurry to get home.”
“The letter doesn’t contain the information you’re looking for,” he said. Then he went on to explain that I would have to go onto the website, use a pin that was written on the page, and then use it to unlock instructions on what to do next.
“All of those steps?” I asked, feeling defeated by the process.
Jake nodded then cleared his throat. “I want to be with you when you make the call, if you don’t mind.”
“Sure,” I said, reading the letter. It detailed all of what Jake had just explained to me.
We stared at each other in our usual way. I didn’t know if I smiled first or if he did.
“Was the guy in baggage claim trying to pick you up?” he asked.
I shrugged, even though I knew the answer was yes. There wasn’t a single ounce of me that wanted to make Jake jealous. I also sensed that he was assessing whether I was considering looking elsewhere for companionship.
“The mystery still abounds,” I said.
He nodded with certainty. “He was trying to pick you up.”
“Well, in any case, I’m in no shape to start a new relationship.”
“You’re in a relationship with me.”
We stared at each other again. Jake was still testing me. We both knew that being related would prevent us from moving forward as lovers. And I hated the fact that I wanted to do something like take his hand in mine or gently kiss his lips. However, it was apparent by how far we were sitting from each other that keeping our distance was the more responsible choice.
Jake coughed into his fist to clear his throat. “Why were you in Tampa anyway?” he asked.
I massaged the tension in my neck thinking about the last twenty hours. “The medical examiner’s office in Tampa got in touch with my aunt and asked her to identify my mother’s body.” Thinking about it all made me weary again, so I sighed. “This morning, we learned that the dead woman wasn’t my mom. But she had my mother’s identification and a locket that belonged to her.”
“Oh,” he whispered with a nod. “Do you know where your mother is?”
I shook my head. “My aunt is going to hire a private investigator.”
“I see,” he said.
“I also learned my grandparents are still alive, but they’re the very religious type who denounced and abandoned my mother and aunt, all because they didn’t conform to their belief system.” I was angry by the time I got to the end of that.
“You learned a lot on your short trip,” he said.
“Yes.” I looked deep into his eyes. “I also think it’s best that I take that surgical fellowship in Boston.”
His frown was so intense that he appeared as if he had just chugged a bottle of vinegar.
“That’s your prerogative.” His voice cracked as he readjusted in his seat. “Our hospital hasn’t made you a counteroffer yet?”
I shook my head softly, already missing him so much. “I don’t think they could if they wanted to. They don’t have the budget.”
“I see,” he said, eyes narrowed to slits. Then he grunted thoughtfully.
Jake kept touching me, and I wished he would stop. For instance, when the car pulled in front of my building, Jake rolled down the window separating the front from the back and told Kirk that he would let me out. He opened the door for me, and when we got out of the car, he gently put his hand on my waist as he slammed it shut. After he retrieved my suitcase from the trunk, we walked into the building, and he touched me on the waist again as he gave me space to enter first, then again before we stepped into the elevator. I didn’t allow myself to think about all the making out we could’ve done on our way up to the third floor. I still longed for his touch, and it drove me crazy.
My residency ended in just over a month, so I wouldn’t have to be around him much longer. However, I shouldn’t have been so attracted to someone who could have been my long-lost brother. Thinking about how it felt sensual every time we kissed as well as all the mind-blowing sex we’d had was making me sick to my stomach.
But goodness gracious, he smells so good. And his stout cock that never fails to stimulate the hot spots in my pussy … I’m going to miss his sexual skills.
“Do you have the key?” he asked as we reached the door to my apartment.
I jumped, startled. “Huh?”
“The key,” he restated.
My skin felt flushed as I dug into the bottom of my purse while concluding Jake wasn’t the only man in the world who knew how to give a girl a real intravaginal orgasm. Once I had the set in my hands, I absentmindedly held them out for him to take. “Here you go.” I sounded winded.
Our fingers touched as he took them. My eyebrows fluttered as I skipped a breath. I hated that I showed him how his nearness made me feel. Thankfully, he didn’t seem to notice as he turned away from me to stick the key into the lock. After he opened the door, he gave a lot of space for me to pass, and I appreciated his doing that.
I stopped in my tracks once I stepped inside. My apartment looked as if a tornado had hit it. Shit was everywhere, and I felt embarrassed that Jake saw my place looking like that.
“Excuse the mess,” I said and started walking around, picking up plastic baggies that I packed my toiletries in, socks to wear on the airplane, and other knickknacks that I had cast aside after deciding to le
ave them at home.
Jake held up a hand. “It’s okay. I’ve already been here.”
I stood up straight as a board, picturing Jake in my messy bathroom and kitchen. “You have?”
He smirked. “I convinced Zara to let me in.”
Jake went on to explain how he’d learned which airline I’d taken, and he had Kirk waiting in baggage claim for me to arrive until he was able to do it himself. His first surgery of the day had gone well, but he’d had to cancel the second one because before being put under, the patient confessed that she’d eaten a meal earlier that morning.
He and I laughed about that.
Jake crossed his arms and regarded me shrewdly. “So how do you feel about me entering your apartment without your permission?”
I rolled my eyes as I looked at my computer sitting on the desk. I pointed at it. “Did you try logging in?”
He raised an eyebrow. “I did.”
I sniffed. “It’s password protected.”
Jake smirked. “I know.”
We grinned at each other. If it were anyone else but Jake, I would probably have given him or her a lecture on privacy. But I still wanted him to know everything about me, just as I wanted to know everything about him.
“Well …” I nodded toward my computer. “I should go over there and figure out what you are to me.”
His eyes smoldered, then he looked toward my bedroom. “That’s an excellent idea.”
Flustered, I unthinkingly tugged my loose topknot out of the band and forced my eyes not to stare at his package. I didn’t want to see if he had a hard-on, not until I knew the results.
Embrace: The Secret Billionaire Asher Christmas Duet, Two (The Dark Christmases Book 9) Page 1
