by Magan Vernon
One Mississippi.
“One, two.” He breathed into my hair, his fingers making small circles on top of my yoga pants.
If I wasn’t freaking out at the moment, I would have maybe found it a bit more endearing. I was just following the commands of his voice, taking in deep breaths.
Closing my eyes, I focused on his words and the sound of my labored breathing as it finally slowed down to normal. Or as normal as it could be in the situation.
Something soft rubbed against my cheeks. I slowly opened my eyes and turned to see Gavin looking up at me, a monogrammed handkerchief clutched in his hands, softly wiping my tears away.
“I’m sorry,” I managed to croak.
A small quirk of his lips that I wouldn’t call a smile, warmed me to my very center. The center that I now realized was firmly planted on his lap.
“Don’t apologize. That was a lot to take in.”
His blue eyes were full of concern and something else burning behind them.
Could I really be thinking of about a guy instead of my mother at a time like this?
I licked my bottom lip. I needed some moisture so I didn’t sound like a frog as I spoke again.
But what would I say?
Was there anything to do now other than run and hide, since I just had a freak-out in front of my boss, an English lord, and the guy I had a teensy-weensy crush on?
His thumb brushed against my cheek, the handkerchief still firmly in his grasp. It surrounded me with its clean cotton scent. I wished at that moment nothing else existed.
Just his stare. The warmth radiating through his hand. Me in the center of it all.
“Am I interrupting something?” bellowed a deep English accent I didn’t recognize.
I jumped up, almost tripping over my own feet as I spun around, facing the direction of the voice.
A man leaned against the doorway. He looked to be around my sister’s age with short cropped sandy blond hair, wearing a dark blue button-down shirt and trousers that set off his bright blue eyes. Eerily similar to the ones I was just staring into.
To Gavin’s credit, he wasn’t a flustered, bumbling mess like I was. Casually he stood up, putting his handkerchief in his back pocket, nodding to the man, then to me. “Hello, Hugh, maybe learn how to knock before barging in.”
“So, I was interrupting? Does Mother know about this or is this one of those girls we don’t bring home to Mummy?” Hugh asked with one of those dimpled grins I rarely saw from Gavin.
Hugh.
His brother.
“Hugh,” Gavin bellowed.
He tilted his chin forward. Giving the guy a dark stare that could have smacked him if it were anything physical. “This is Natalie, the new curator. A little misstep on the ladder. Making sure she’s all right.”
It was as if all the air had been whooshed out of me again as that damn smile of his returned to Gavin’s face. “Natalie, this is my brother, Hugh. I was coming to tell you he was on his way for a visit, since he’s on break from University. But don’t worry, he won’t be staying long, so ignore whatever rubbish comes out of his mouth.”
“I’m offended, brother,” Hugh said in mock shock before crossing the room, holding his hand out to me. “Sorry about that, Miss Natalie.”
I took his hand, my brain in a fog as I stared between the two brothers.
First, I was fighting my feelings for the guy.
Then the bombshell about my mom.
As if things couldn’t get more complicated, now this.
“Natalie,” Gavin’s voice knocked me out of my thoughts.
Slowly I let go of his brother’s hand and turned toward him, trying to keep my nervous hands from shaking. “Yes, Gavin, I mean, Lord Gavin?”
There went that sexy quirk of his lips again. “You can take the rest of the afternoon off if you need to.”
I shook my head, memories of what happened just a few moments ago flooding back with another wave of emotions I had to fend off.
I couldn’t burst into tears again in front of everyone.
“No, it’s fine. It’ll be good to keep busy.”
“All right. If you need anything, just let me or Meredith know. I’ll make sure to send her up with some tea in a bit.”
He then turned to his brother. “I guess we’re supposed to go over some stuff? Or can we put that off with a round of golf first?”
He laughed, patting Gavin on the back. “Let’s start with a drink.”
Gavin gave me one more longing glance over his shoulder. One I couldn’t read but wanted it to mean something so badly.
Not just that he felt sorry for me.
Even though I’d just gone through an experience that should have embarrassed the snot out of me, it brought me closer to him. It made my heart beat faster for the guy I, at first, just dismissed off as a rich snob. But just as quickly as he was looking in my direction, he was out of the room. All I could hear was the tapping of his shoes on the wood floor and his brother’s laughter.
Once they were out of earshot I slumped in the chair, still radiating with the heat from Gavin’s body.
I’d taken this job to take care of my mom’s bills, but now, what if she needed me? What would happen when Madison went back to school?
I closed my eyes tightly then opened them. I had to do this. I had to finish this job, like I planned, by the end of the summer so I could get back to my mom.
I couldn’t keep getting distracted by crushes on bosses or anything else.
With a final push, I stood up and then slowly crept back over to the ladder. I would look up the information I needed and get back to work.
It’s what’s best for everyone, I had to keep telling myself. No matter what.
…
I wasn’t sure how long it had been since I moved from the library to another one of the sitting rooms attached to a bedroom.
Instead of buzzing, I’d turned up the sound on my phone, so “Video Killed the Radio Star” bellowed through the speakers.
Quickly, I put down one of the many tapestries I was tagging and pulled the phone out of my pocket.
I sucked in a deep breath, trying to straighten my shoulders and smile. I couldn’t crumble before I even answered.
It wasn’t Madison-Freckled-Cheeks, but Mom’s hollow face that came into view.
The woman who used to never go out without lipstick now sat in one of her favorite worn leather chairs, her face pale and ashen. Her head was wrapped in a yellow floral scarf that was knotted at her forehead like a trendy hipster.
“Mom, I wasn’t expecting you to call from Maddy’s phone. How are you? You look good. I knew that scarf would be perfect for you,” I rambled so I wouldn’t have to face the harsh reality of what she might say next.
One of her frail hands went to her head, patting the scarf. “Oh, yes, I’ve been meaning to thank you for these. I’ve just…well…”
She closed her eyes, letting out a deep breath.
Tears started to well up, and I had to push them back. I couldn’t break down, not again, and especially not in front of Mom.
“It’s okay. I know you and Madison have been totally busy. I’ve been busy here, too. I should have video-called you more, too, but with the time difference and—”
“Natalie,” Mom’s word cut through me as I stared back at her face. Her eyes were now open and staring right through me.
I blinked in response, biting my bottom lip.
Shit.
Stay strong, Nat. Stay strong.
“I know Madison told you about my doctor’s appointment, so I wanted to be the one to call you with the results…” Her words trailed.
She sighed before a large smile, the first one I’d seen on her in ages, bloomed across her face. “The doctor confirmed it was just scar tissue. I’m still in remi
ssion, honey.”
This time I didn’t hold back the happy tears as they flooded out of me.
“That’s amazing, Mom. Great news,” I managed to get between sniffles, wiping my cheeks with the back of my hand.
“It is, honey. So, don’t worry about me, okay? I’m getting stronger every day, and Madison is helping to take care of me…you know when she isn’t with, he-who-shall-not-be-named.” She raised what little eyebrows she had.
“Think she’ll break up with him soon, or are we going to be stuck with a guy who refers to all of us as ‘dude’ forever?” I laughed, my whole body shaking as the weight lifted off my shoulders.
Mom shook her head, but at least she was still smiling. “Your sister will do the right thing, like I know you always have. Including taking this job all the way across the world. But I hope you haven’t been too worried about me and are enjoying this amazing experience.”
“Oh, I am, Webley is beautiful, Mom. I’ll have to take you back here someday. We could walk through the town and I’ll show you the cobblestone paths and all the architecture that’s like something straight out of a fairy tale.”
“And your new boss? Is he treating you well? Not giving you a hard time like in those emails?”
My cheeks warmed, picturing all of my little encounters with Gavin.
My boss, and a freaking lord.
That’s all he was.
That’s what he had to be.
“He is,” was all I could manage to get out, or more like squeak out.
Then I swallowed hard, refocusing my mind.
I’d run the gambit of every single emotion that day, and somehow it all kept coming back to Gavin.
I had to get a grip and focus on what I was here for: do a job and pay for my mom’s medical bills.
That was it.
No matter what my beating heart was saying otherwise at the mention of his name.
Chapter Eight
Lord Gavin
“Are we going to talk about the redhead who was on your lap or just keep ignoring it?” Hugh asked.
We sat on one of the terraces overlooking the gardens. A glass of brandy in both of our hands. I thought I’d been able to avoid the topic through our meeting and even dinner. But now as the sun began to set, I guess it couldn’t wait any longer.
The more my brother sat beside me, asking these stupid questions, the less time I had to check up on said redhead.
After what she just went through hearing about her mother, my idiot brother had to come in with his smart-arse remarks.
“Think of that question all on your own, or did Mother send you to ask about the new curator?” I folded my arms over my chest, leaning back in my chair.
He laughed. “You know I don’t listen to everything Mother says. Though she may have mentioned a little something, since she knew I was coming.”
“By mention, you mean she told you to make sure the American girl was working and not just someone I was shagging?” I asked, the words bitter on my tongue.
“Don’t you think she already did a full background check on the girl? She assumed a well-educated American redhead wasn’t the problem. But from what I saw in the library, maybe she should have been more concerned with her instead of you adopting all of the strays in England.”
I clenched my jaw, speaking through gritted teeth, “There’s nothing going on with Natalie and me. Because we’re not shagging. I don’t need to explain to you what was going on. But she’d just received some bad news, and I was consoling her. As for the dogs, I already got the lecture from Mother about them. We have the resources here, so why not use them?”
He smiled, raising his eyebrows. “And you just came up with adopting all the mutts on your own? No influence from a girl with a pair of big doe eyes, who may happen to be going through a rough time?”
“Do you really think I’m the type of man who would do something on a whim just because of a woman? Come on, you know me better than that.”
I took a big gulp of my drink, hoping that would settle down the hammering in my chest.
“Ah, I do, that’s why I was very surprised when I walked in on you today. Not that there’s anything wrong with you having a good time with the historian. But we both know there’s no way in hell Mother or Father would ever let anything get serious.”
“They can’t control us forever,” I snapped, slamming my drink down on the table so it sloshed in the glass.
Hugh blinked, shaking his head. “Something tells me that Mother’s been grating on your nerves again about the marriage thing. Did she try to send you a duchess from London yet?”
I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose. “Not yet, but I’m sure that’s not far off. The woman doesn’t care that I’m already a lord. She doesn’t think my life is complete until I’ve married and given her a horde of grandchildren.”
“And you don’t want that?”
I shrugged. “Not saying I don’t plan on getting married someday, but when all of these spoiled baronesses and duchesses are thrust upon me, and I’m expected to not only have a conversation with them, but spend the rest of my life with them? Last thing I want.”
“You don’t have to tell me twice,” he muttered, taking a big swig of his drink.
“She still trying to set you up with that girl from Surrey whose father is a marquess?”
He smirked, nodding slightly as he shoved his hands into the pockets of his trousers. “The same one who was supposed to be my date to the last royal wedding, and I caught her snogging the duchess’s cousin in the sanctuary? Yep. The very one.”
My eyes widened. “Are you bloody serious?”
He shrugged. “Obviously we weren’t each other’s types. Still not stopping Mother, though. I’m sure she’ll eventually stop pestering both of us, or we’ll get better at ignoring her calls.”
“Obviously that hasn’t worked out well for either of us, since you’re here on her bidding.”
“Hey, she’s not the only reason I’m here.”
“Really? You just wanted to spend time with your brother and maybe get a shovel to do some sorting of Great Aunt Sarah’s stuff? Natalie has found quite a few vases if you need to spruce up your place at Cambridge.”
“So, she really is working and not just sitting on your lap then?” He smirked.
“I’m never going to live this one down, am I?” I huffed, wishing I could deny what he was saying.
She just had terrible news delivered, and there I was, picturing how perfectly we fit together when she was in my arms. Not the type of thing I should have been thinking about, but with her back pressed against my chest, I prayed she couldn’t hear the pounding of my heart against her.
Hugh laughed, obviously seeing through me. “Not if you’re going to keep pretending that what I saw was innocent.”
I shook my head, trying to control the annoyance and pounding in my temple. If I didn’t tell Hugh the truth, he would just assume the worst of Natalie, and I couldn’t let that happen.
“She took this job because of her mother’s cancer. I happened to be near when she got a call that I insisted she answer. It turned out to be her sister, saying they think her mother’s cancer’s back.”
“Oh balls,” Hugh muttered, putting his head down and rubbing the back of his neck like a little kid who was just reprimanded.
“She was a mess, could barely breathe, tears everywhere. She almost collapsed right there on the desk.”
He shook his head. “Bloody American medical system. Bills for a cancer patient?”
“Right? Cocked up. Then if it’s back…” A chill curled up my spine.
When Great Aunt Sarah first got sick, she was in her nineties and had no children of her own. Sure, she had the maids, but no other family except her niece and nephews. She had every worldly possession she could ever want, medical bills ta
ken care of, and she still succumbed to the disease.
Natalie’s mother still had two daughters, who obviously cared about her tremendously if one was willing to go halfway around the world for a job to help.
When we did the background check on Natalie and I found out about the medical bills piling on her credit, I immediately put her at the top of the list and even upped the first salary offer.
With her feisty attitude, even through emails, she wouldn’t just take it outright.
But seeing the full gravity of her dire situation had something in my chest banging harder than before. Something I couldn’t quite put my finger on.
“So we’ll keep what happened today between us? I don’t want Natalie to be embarrassed or her pride get in the way,” I said, folding my arms over my chest.
I didn’t need to add that he didn’t need to go rattling off to Mother, either. The less she knew about what happened at the manor, the better.
“You have my word,” he replied, raising his glass.
…
After Hugh finally went up to one of the guest rooms for the night, I waited a few minutes before getting up and heading inside myself.
But I didn’t go toward my room. I pivoted, looking for the familiar blue light flickering from under her door.
But the hallway was dark, except for the few dots of lamps that illuminated the oil paintings.
Creepy old things with eyes that always watched me.
Pulling my phone out of my pocket, I peeked at the time.
Was she still working?
Telling myself I was just making sure that Natalie went to bed at a decent hour, I turned and headed toward the library, my heart thumping hard in my chest the entire way.
Why was I being a damn squib?
I was worried about the girl and her mother, that’s all.
I wasn’t a monster and I cared.
That’s why I was going to find her.
And maybe it was hard to go the whole day without seeing her and wondering how she was. If she had controlled her breathing. If she’d heard anything more.
Bollocks, I was starting to sound like a little wanker.
