“You had better locate Volney and tell him that the action is about to begin,” Esk told Marrow. “The voles will want to tunnel well out of the way.”
“Immediately,” the skeleton agreed, and headed off.
“How do I contact the demons?” Bria asked. “I don’t know their leader, or even whether they have a leader.”
“I think you will just have to go out and see whether any one of them looks like a leader, and then address that one. If he’s not the leader, he can still act as liaison. Tell him that we won’t leave until the demons do.”
“I’ll do that,” she agreed.
“We had better rejoin our contacts,” Chex said, “in case there are any questions or confusions.”
“Yes,” Latia agreed. “You know, I can see why my friend married that ogre. There’s a certain splendor in all that brute power uncluttered by the restraints of intellect.”
“Ogres do have their points,” Esk said, feeling foolishly proud of his heritage.
They departed, and Esk found himself alone. It had been a long time since he had been alone, even for a minute, and he discovered that he felt uncomfortable with it.
Then the ogres waded into the Vale of the Vole, punching at demons with great gusto, and the winged monsters flew across the Vale, spearing demons with their claws with equal gusto. The weather continued to deprove, but Esk stood out in the wind and rain and watched the carnage with simple joy. The campaign to restore the Kiss-Mee River had begun!
A demoness appeared beside him. “So it is you!” she exclaimed. “Just as the brass girl said!”
Esk looked closely at her. “Oh, no—Metria!” he exclaimed. “What are you doing here?”
“I heard the forest shuddering, and saw the monsters massing above, so I was curious. Then I saw this strange metal woman, and she told me that you were running this show. Just what do you think you’re doing, Pesk?”
“That’s Esk! We think we’re clearing the demons out of the Vale of the Vole.” Indeed, as he spoke, there was a great splashing, as the ogres reached the channelized river and waded in, knocking out the retaining walls as they went. “You won’t have the Kick-Mee River to kick around any more.”
“Kick-Mee,” she repeated. “That’s almost clever, Esk.”
“Thank you. Now go away. We have to restore the river you demons ruined.”
“But we only did that to get rid of the hummers!” she protested.
“And did it work?”
“No,” she confessed. “They’re worse than ever.”
“Well, we’re only doing this to get rid of you demons.”
“Do you think it will work?”
There was something about the way she inquired that bothered him. “Why don’t you go back to my hideout and relax?” he asked nastily.
“It was getting dull there after you quit. We demons aren’t happy unless we have someone to pester.” She focused on him thoughtfully. “I think you’re more of a creature than I guessed, before. Let me do you that service we discussed.” Her dress dissolved, leaving her naked.
“Absolutely not!” Esk exclaimed. “You disgust me!”
“No, I never discussed you with anyone else. I didn’t even remember you, till now.”
“That’s disgust as in ugh,” Esk clarified. “You’re confusing words again.”
“Ugh,” she agreed. “Thank you for that correction. Let’s do this quickly, so I can still have time to bash a bird before they quit.” She reached to embrace him.
He straight-armed her, but his hand passed right through her head without affecting her body. She embraced him hungrily, rubbing her lush torso against him. “Let me just get these clothes off you, you darling mortal man,” she murmured.
“No!” Esk cried. This time it carried the force of his magic, and she had to desist.
She stood back slightly, considering him. “Why not, Esk? Don’t you like women?”
“Sure I like women! I just don’t like demons!”
She snapped her fingers. “That brass-ass! She’s the one! I should have realized!”
“So what if she is?” he asked defensively, bothered that he should have to defend anything to a demoness.
“Esk, she’s no more your kind than I am! She has no living flesh, no soul. Why be a fool?”
“What do you care what kind of a fool I am? You got my hideout; now leave me alone!”
“Well, I’ll think about it,” she said. “Meanwhile, I’ll just serve as liaison to my folk.”
“I don’t want you as liaison!”
“Too bad,” she said, and faded out with a superior smile.
The rain was easing, and the clouds thinning. But the melee was getting worse. Esk peered at the action, and discovered to his horror that the ogres and winged monsters were starting to fight each other. Even as he saw that, Marrow hurried back.
“I told Volney, then got caught in the scuffle,” the skeleton said.
“Our monsters are starting to fight each other!” Esk said. “Go find our ogre and winged monster liaisons and tell them to stop it! We haven’t gotten rid of the demons yet!”
“Right away!” Marrow agreed, and hurried off again.
Bria ran up. “I found a liaison!” she cried. “A demoness who said she takes the message.”
“I don’t want that one!” Esk said. “That’s the one I know from before! She came here and tried to—never mind.”
“Oh, she did, did she?” Bria said with some asperity. “Well, two can play at that game!” She stepped out of her dress.
“What are you doing?” he asked, upset.
“I’m seducing you, of course.” She came to embrace him.
“But there’s a battle going on!”
“Yes, we’ll have to hurry.”
“But I thought you wanted half my soul!”
She paused as if startled, then recovered. “Yes, give me half your soul!”
Esk had promised, but he did not like this at all. This was not the way Bria had been before.
“Well, come on!” she said urgently.
“No. Not now,” he said, feeling like a complete heel. Why was he reneging?
“Well, then, see if you get any of this!” she snapped, and her dress reappeared on her body. She stalked away, and was soon lost to view.
The campaign was falling apart, as the ogres and winged monsters fought each other instead of the demons. This had to be stopped—but how? He had told them not to fight each other!
Marrow returned. “The voles want to know why the monsters are fighting each other instead of the demons.”
“I wish I knew!” Esk said. “Maybe the monsters lack discipline. Maybe a better leader would have prevented this.”
Chex galloped back. “My sire says the ogres started it!” she exclaimed. “They just laid into the winged monsters they could reach!”
“We’ll have to see what Latia reports,” Esk said dejectedly. “Oh, everything is going wrong!”
“The battle, anyway,” she agreed.
“With Bria, too. She—”
“There she is now,” the centaur said.
Indeed, Bria was coming back. Esk decided that abjection was the best policy. “Bria, I’m sorry!” he exclaimed. “I’ll give you my soul right now!”
She halted. “What?”
“I didn’t mean to renege! I just—was confused.”
“Esk, I told you I wanted you to wait. It’s too big a decision to make on the spur of the moment.”
“Yes, but then you asked for it right away, and—”
“I did not! How could you think such a thing?”
“But just now, when you were here—”
“What are you talking about? I’ve been down looking for a liaison demon the whole time.”
“She was,” Chex put in. “I saw her down near the river channel.”
“But—” Esk said, his confusion getting worse.
“And I found one,” Bria said. “A demoness, who said she would
talk to her folk.”
“Yes, that was Metria, the one who—”
Latia rushed up, gasping. “Crunch says the winged monsters started it! They just flew down and started attacking ogres, so naturally the ogres fought back! Why did they break the truce?”
“The ogres started it!” Chex protested. “My sire would not deceive me!”
“Crunch would not deceive an ugly curse fiend,” Latia retorted, “even if he were smart enough to make the attempt, and she stupid enough to fall for it. The ogres didn’t start it.”
“Everybody blames the mischief on somebody else!” Esk cried. “But somebody must have started it!”
Then they all did double takes, coming to a common realization. “The demons can change form,” Chex said.
“And they love mischief,” Latia added.
“And they have motive to mess up our campaign,” Bria concluded. “Once I talked to Metria, they knew what we were doing, and who our leader was!”
“So demons in the form of ogres attacked the winged monsters,” Chex said.
“And demons in the form of winged monsters attacked the ogres,” Latia said.
Esk snapped his fingers. “And Metria—she must have assumed your form, Bria! Now I remember—your clothes reappeared on you as if by magic! You can’t dress that way!”
Bria pursed her lips. “She emulated me—and tried to get your soul?”
Esk was overwhelmed by new chagrin. He seemed to be flushing across his entire body.
“I think we had better hurry back and explain to our liaisons,” Chex said. “And call a temporary retreat.”
“Yes,” Latia said. Both hurried away.
Bria approached Esk. “And you almost gave it to her,” she said. “What a disaster that would have been!”
“How could I have been such a fool!” Esk moaned.
“Because you are a nice man with a nice soul who just doesn’t want to believe evil of anyone,” she said. “I think I had better stay close to you, after all. The demoness can bring any messages here.”
“I thought she was you, and I told her no,” Esk said, still overcome by guilt.
“And she took off her clothes,” Bria said. “I suppose I should be insulted, but I’m not. I think maybe she wasn’t acting like me, so you were suspicious, and that’s why you told her no.”
Esk brightened. “Yes! She wasn’t acting like you! Only I didn’t realize—”
“If I seem to ask you for anything, or offer you anything, just say no,” Bria said. “Because it won’t be me, it will be her.”
“I guess I’m glad it wasn’t you,” he said. “I apologize for thinking it was you.”
“Accepted,” she said, and they kissed.
The battle was beginning to clear, as the ogres and winged monsters got the word and retreated. The demon ploy had failed, but the battle had not been won.
By the time the disengagement was complete, the day was late. To Esk it seemed as if only an hour had passed, but it had been many hours.
They discussed the day’s events, and worked out a new plan for the morrow. Each monster would take a particular territory, and bash anything else found within that region, regardless of its appearance. That way the demons could not fool them, because each monster would know that no ally would intrude in his particular spot. Marrow would serve as an observer, but not as a messenger, because no messenger could be trusted. The demons would emulate the messenger, and carry false messages. But though there might be a hundred skeletons ranging the battlefield, only one would be the true Marrow, and Esk would be able to identify him by using his magic. He would simply tell any skeleton no, meaning that his appearance was wrong, and if it were a demon, that appearance would change. Only the true Marrow would be unable to change. Esk could have done this with Metria, had he thought of it in time. “So I will listen to Marrow, tomorrow,” he concluded. “And I will talk to any others directly, showing my magic, so that I know they are valid, and they know I am.”
Then they made their various preparations for the night. Bria joined Esk. “I want to give you something,” she murmured.
“No,” he said, alarmed.
She laughed. “Don’t worry, I’m not the demoness! It’s the accommodation spell. I want you to have it.”
“Me? Why?”
“I can be very soft when I want to be, but not that soft. There are some things flesh can’t do with brass. That’s why the spell is necessary. Keep the spell; if you don’t invoke it, I can’t seduce you.”
“Uh,” he said, nonplused.
“So if I succeed in doing so, you’ll know it isn’t me, it’s the demoness.”
“But—”
“I just thought you’d like the security of knowing that.” She handed him the spell.
Esk looked at the object she had given him. It looked like a grain of rice. “This—is it?”
“Some of the elven spells are very small, but potent nonetheless.” She smiled briefly. “So to speak.”
“But I’ll lose this!”
“Swallow it, then; you won’t be able to lose it.”
“But if I digest it, it will be gone!”
“No, it will be part of you for all your life. You will be able to invoke it anytime by gesturing like this.” She made an encompassing sweep with her hands. “All you will have to do is be close to the one you wish to accommodate, whoever that may be.”
“But I don’t want anyone but you!”
“I was teasing you, Esk,” she said gently. “Though it is true it would work with any female. If you get the wrong one, simply dissolve it by reversing the gesture.”
“But it’s your spell!” he protested. “You found it!”
“And you found me, so I am yours.”
“But you’re the one who needs it, not me. I mean, you’re a brassie, in a realm of flesh, so—”
“There’s only one I wish to accommodate, so he can have the spell.”
“But this is so—”
“Esk,” she said seriously. “I asked you for half your soul, so I could love you better and be more like you. You may give me that, when the time is right. You run the risk that if you do, and I am not what I seem, you will have lost half your soul and have nothing in return. Well, I want you to have something back, and I think this is it. I run the risk of giving it to you, and then you leave and I have nothing in return. So we are sharing risks, but if we win, we win together. Eat the spell; make it yours for always.”
Esk ate the spell. Then he lay down and held her until he tired and fell asleep, after which she held him until he woke again. Somewhere between they exchanged an apology or two, but these might simply have been kisses.
Next day the campaign resumed. The ogres marched to their assigned quadrants, and the winged monsters flew to theirs. Latia and Chex went to make contact with their liaisons, and Volney with his. Then both groups commenced the bashing of demons, and if the demons resembled other ogres or monsters, so much the better. The voles, forewarned, lay low.
Marrow walked through the Vale, up and down its long length, inspecting the situation. Soon the skeleton returned. “The monsters are bashing each other again!” he cried. “Sound the retreat!”
“Take my hand,” Esk said.
Perplexed, the skeleton extended a bone hand, and Esk took it in his own. “No,” he said.
The skeleton shimmered and changed, becoming a grotesque parody of itself. “Get lost, demon,” Esk said.
“Demoness!” it said, and Metria’s visage formed. “How did you know?”
“Marrow wouldn’t tell a fib like that,” he replied.
She puffed into irritated vapor and dissipated.
“You really showed her,” Bria said, taking his hand. “Come, let’s entertain ourselves while the campaign proceeds.”
Esk looked around—and saw Bria on his other side, seated a little way away. He looked back at the first. The two were identical.
“Ignore the demoness over there,” the closer o
ne said. “She doesn’t matter.” She drew him in toward her for a kiss.
Esk remembered what Bria had told him the last evening. He could distinguish between the brassie and the demoness—but only by doing something whose success would make him wish he hadn’t, because it was possible only with the demoness. Unless he used the accommodation spell, which he had no intention of doing. That left him with no way.
Then he snapped the fingers of his free hand. “What a fool I am!” he exclaimed.
“For waiting so long,” the Bria close to him agreed.
“No,” he said, invoking his magic.
She fuzzed in outline, then reverted to Metria’s form. “Curses, foiled again!” she exclaimed, disgusted, and vaporized.
Esk looked at Bria. “You never spoke!” he exclaimed.
“I knew you could distinguish between us if you wanted to,” she said.
“I wanted to, but—” He shrugged. “Not the way you suggested.”
“I know I shouldn’t tease you like that! It could make trouble.”
“Not anymore,” he said. “Now that I’ve finally figured out the obvious.”
“Your fleshly brains do seem rather inefficient at times.”
“I’m insulted.”
“Then I must apologize.” She came to him and put her arms around him.
“No,” he said.
She halted in place. “I wish you’d let me.”
“Just making sure,” he said. “You didn’t dissolve into vapor, so you are the right one.”
She nodded agreement, but still could not kiss him, because of his magic. So he kissed her instead.
The battle died down. The monsters were either tiring or running out of targets. “Do you think the demons have flown?” Bria asked.
“I don’t trust them to give up so readily,” he replied. “There must be some trick.” But he couldn’t think what it might be, because the demons certainly seemed gone.
The skeleton returned. “The action has died out everywhere,” he reported. “The monsters have run out of demons.”
“Give me your hand.”
The skeleton extended his hand. “No,” Esk said.
“I realize you don’t trust this report, but that’s the way it is,” Marrow said uncomfortably.
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