“I didn’t appreciate what your mother did, manipulating me like that,” Phil continued. “She knew I never would have agreed to living in town, and she went ahead and made the decision, anyway.”
“But, Dad, it was a brilliant idea.” The enterprise had been a money-maker from the first. The house was in fairly good condition, but had enough quirks to keep his father occupied with a variety of repair projects. The bed-and-breakfast employed the best of both his parents’ skills. Phil was a natural organizer and his mother was personable and warm, good at making people feel welcome.
His father’s eyes momentarily clouded. “It was brilliant, but at the time I didn’t see it that way. I don’t mind telling you I was mad enough to consider ending our marriage.”
Cal frowned. “You didn’t mean it, Dad.”
“The hell I didn’t. I would’ve done it, too, if I hadn’t been tied down to that hospital bed. It gave me time to think about what I’d do without Mary in my life, and after a few days I decided to give your mother a second chance.”
Cal laughed outright.
“You think I’m joking, but I was serious and your mother knew it. When she left the hospital, she asked me to have my attorney contact hers. The way I felt right then, I swear I was determined to do it, Cal. I figured there are some things a man won’t let a woman interfere with in life, and as far as I was concerned at that moment, Mary had crossed the line.”
Ah, so this was what Cal was supposed to hear. In her lack of trust, Jane had crossed the line with him, too; only, he hadn’t been the one who’d decided to break up the family. That decision had rested entirely with Jane.
“I notice you haven’t pried into my situation yet,” Cal murmured.
“No, I haven’t,” Phil said. “That’s your business and Jane’s. If you want out of the marriage, then that’s up to you.”
“Out of the marriage!” Cal shot back. “Jane’s the one who wants out. She decided not to return to Promise. The day of her father’s funeral, she tells me she’s staying with her mother…indefinitely.”
“You wanted this?”
“The hell I did!”
“But you left.”
Cal had replayed that fateful night a hundred times, asking himself these same questions. Should he have stayed and reasoned it out with her? Should he have taken a stand and insisted she listen to reason? Three weeks later, he still didn’t have the answer.
“Don’t you think Jane might have been distraught over her father’s death?” Phil wanted to know.
“Yeah,” Cal agreed, “but it’s been damn near a month now and she hasn’t had a change of heart yet.”
“No, she hasn’t,” Phil said, and sighed. “It’s a shame, too, a real shame.”
“I love her, Dad.” Cal was willing to admit it. “I miss her and the kids.” He thought of the day he’d found Paul’s blankey. After all the distress that stupid blanket had caused him, Cal was so glad to see it that he’d hugged it to his chest, breathing in the familiar scent of his son. Afterward, the knot in his stomach was so tight he hadn’t eaten for the rest of the day.
“I remember when Jennifer left you,” Phil said, growing melancholy, “just a couple of days before the wedding. You looked like someone had stabbed a knife straight through your gut. I knew you loved her, but you didn’t go after her.”
“Hell, no.” Jennifer had made her decision.
“Pride wouldn’t let you,” Phil added. “In that case, I think it was probably for the best. I’m not convinced of it this time.” His father shook his head. “I loved your mother, don’t misunderstand me—it damn near killed me when she died—but as strong as my love for her was, we didn’t have the perfect marriage. We argued, but we managed to work out our problems. I’m sure you’ll resolve everything with Jane.”
Cal hoped that was true, but he wasn’t nearly as confident as his father.
“The key is communication,” Phil said.
Cal held his father’s look. “That’s a little difficult when Jane’s holed up halfway across the country. Besides, as I understand it, communication is a two-way street. Jane has to be willing to talk to me and she isn’t.”
“Have you made an effort to get in touch with her?”
He shook his head.
“That’s what I thought.”
“Go ahead and say it,” Cal muttered. “You think I should go after Jane.”
“Are you asking my opinion?” Phil asked.
“No, but you’re going to give it to me, anyway.”
“If Jane was my wife,” Phil said, his eyes intent on Cal, “I’d go back for her and settle this once and for all. I wouldn’t return to Promise without her. Are you willing to do that, son?”
Cal needed to think about it, and about all the things that had been said. “I don’t know,” he answered, being as honest as he knew how. “I just don’t know.”
Nicole Nelson arrived for work at Tumbleweed Books bright and early on the Friday morning following Thanksgiving Day. With the official start of the Christmas season upon them, the day was destined to be a busy one. She let herself in the back door, prepared to open the bookstore for Annie, who was leaving more and more of the responsibility to her, which proved—to Nicole’s immense satisfaction—that Annie liked and trusted her.
Nicole had taken a calculated risk over Thanksgiving and lost. In the end she’d spent the holiday alone, even though she’d received two dinner invitations. Her plan had been to spend the day with Cal. She would’ve made sure he didn’t feel threatened, would have couched her suggestion in compassionate terms—just two lonely people making it through the holiday. Unfortunately it hadn’t turned out that way. She’d phoned the ranch house twice and there’d been no answer, which left her to wonder where he’d gone and who he’d been with.
Apparently the wife was out of the picture. That had been surprisingly easy. Jane Patterson didn’t deserve her husband if she wasn’t willing to fight for him. Most women did fight. Usually their attempts were just short of pathetic, but for reasons Nicole had yet to understand, men generally chose to stay with their wives.
Those who didn’t…well, the truth was, Nicole quickly grew bored with them. It was different with Cal, had always been different. Never before had she shown her hand more blatantly than she had with Dr. Jane. Nicole almost felt sorry for her. Really, all she’d been doing was enlightening Jane about a few home truths. The woman didn’t appreciate what she had if she was willing to let Cal go with barely a protest.
The phone rang. It wasn’t even nine, the store didn’t officially open for another hour, and already they were receiving calls.
“Tumbleweed Books,” Nicole answered.
“Annie Porter, please.” The voice sounded vaguely familiar.
“I’m sorry, Annie won’t be in until ten.”
“But I just phoned the house and Lucas told me she was at work.”
“Then she should be here any minute.” Playing a hunch, Nicole asked, “Is this Jane Patterson?”
The hesitation at the other end confirmed her suspicion. “Is this Nicole Nelson?”
“It is,” Nicole said, then added with a hint of regret, “I’m sorry to hear about you and Cal.”
There was a soft disbelieving laugh. “I doubt that. I’d appreciate it if you’d let Annie know I phoned.”
“Of course. I understand your father recently passed away. I am sorry, Jane.”
Jane paused, but thanked her.
“Annie was really upset about it. She seems fond of your family.”
Another pause. “Please have her call when it’s convenient.”
“I will.” Nicole felt the need to keep Jane on the line. Know your enemy, she thought. “My friend Jennifer Healy was the one who broke off her engagement with Cal. Did you know that?”
The responding sigh told Nicole that Jane had grown impatient with her. “I remember hearing something along those lines.”
“Cal didn’t go after Jennifer, either.”<
br />
“Either?” Jane repeated.
“Cal never said who wanted the separation—you or him. It’s not something we talk about. But the fact that he hasn’t sent for you says a great deal, don’t you think?”
“What’s happening between my husband and me is none of your damn business. Goodbye, Nicole.” Her words were followed by a click and then a dial tone.
So Dr. Jane had hung up on her. That didn’t come as a shock. If anything, it stimulated Nicole. She’d moved to Promise, determined to have Cal Patterson. Through the years, he’d never strayed far from her mind. She’d lost her fair share of married men to their wives, but that wasn’t going to happen this time.
So far she’d been smart, played her cards right, and her patience had been rewarded. In three weeks, she’d only contacted Cal once and that was about a book order. Shortly after he’d returned from California alone, the town had been filled with speculation. The news excited Nicole. She’d planted the seeds, let gossip water Jane’s doubts, trusting that time would eventually bring her hopes to fruition. With Jane still in California, Nicole couldn’t help being curious about the status of the relationship, so she’d phoned to let him know the book Jane had ordered was in. Only Jane hadn’t ordered any book….
Playing dumb, Nicole had offered to drop it off at the ranch, since she was headed in that direction anyway—or so she’d claimed. Cal declined, then suggested Annie mail it to Jane at her mother’s address in California. Despite her effort to keep Cal talking, it hadn’t worked. But he’d been in a hurry; he must’ve had things to do. And he probably felt a bit depressed about the deterioration of his marriage. After all, no man enjoyed failure. Well, she’d just have to comfort him, wouldn’t she? She sensed that her opportunity would come soon.
It was always more difficult when there were children involved. In all honesty, Nicole didn’t feel good about destroying a family. However, seeing just how easy it’d been to break up this marriage made her suspect that the relationship hadn’t been all that secure in the first place.
She’d bide her time. It wouldn’t be long now before Cal needed someone to turn to. And Nicole had every intention of being that someone.
After speaking to that horrible woman, Jane felt wretched. With little effort, Nicole had let it be known that she and Cal were continuing to see one another. Sick to her stomach, Jane headed for her bedroom.
“Jane.” Her mother stepped into the room. “Are you all right? Was that Cal on the phone? What happened? I saw you talking and all at once the color drained from your face and you practically ran in here.”
“I’m fine, Mom,” Jane assured her. “No, it wasn’t Cal. It wasn’t anyone important.”
“I finished writing all the thank-you notes and decided I need a break. How about if I take you and the children out to lunch?”
The thought of food repelled her. “I don’t feel up to going out, Mom. Sorry.”
“You won’t mind if I take the children? Santa’s arriving at the mall this afternoon and I know Paul and Mary Ann will be thrilled.”
An afternoon alone sounded wonderful to Jane. “Are you sure it won’t be too much for you?”
“Time with these little ones is exactly what I need.”
“Is there anything you want me to do while you’re out?” Jane asked, although she longed for nothing more than a two-hour nap.
“As a matter of fact, there is,” Stephanie said. “I want you to rest. You don’t look well. You’re tired and out of sorts.”
That was putting it mildly. Jane felt devastated and full of despair, and given the chance, she’d delight in tearing Nicole Nelson’s eyes out! What a lovely Christian thought, she chastised herself.
“Mom.” Paul stood in the doorway to her bedroom.
“Aren’t you going with Grandma?” Jane asked.
Paul nodded, then came into the room and handed her his blankey. “This is for you.” Jane smiled as he placed the tattered much-loved quilt on the bed.
“Thank you, sweetheart,” she said, and kissed his brow.
Jane heard the front door close as the children left with her mother. Taking them to a mall the day after Thanksgiving was the act of an insane woman, in Jane’s opinion. She wouldn’t be caught anywhere near crowds like that. As soon as the thought formed in her mind, Jane realized she hadn’t always felt that way. A few years ago she’d been just as eager as all those other shoppers. Even in medical school she’d found time to hunt down the best buys. It’d been a matter of pride; the cheaper she could purchase an item, the bigger the bragging rights.
Not so these days. None of that seemed important anymore. The closest mall was a hundred miles from the ranch. Most everything she owned was either bought in town or ordered through a catalog or over the Internet. The life she lived now was based in small-town America. And she loved it.
She missed Promise. She missed her husband even more.
Her friends, too. Jane could hardly imagine what they must think. The only person she’d talked to had been Annie, and then just once and briefly. Annie had called the week before. When she asked about Cal, Jane had refused to discuss him, other than to say they’d separated. It would do no good to rehash her current situation with Annie, especially since Nicole worked for her now.
With her son’s blanket wrapped around her shoulders, Jane did manage to sleep for an hour. When she awoke, she knew instantly who she needed to talk to—Dovie Hennessey.
The older woman had been her first friend in Promise, and Jane valued her opinion. Maybe Dovie could help her muddle her way through the events of the past few months. She was sorry she hadn’t talked to her earlier. She supposed it was because her father’s death had shaken her so badly; she’d found it too difficult to reach out. Dealing with the children depleted what energy she had. Anything beyond the most mundane everyday functions seemed beyond her. As a physician, Jane should have recognized the signs of depression earlier, but then, it was often much harder to be objective about one’s own situation.
To her disappointment Dovie didn’t answer. She could have left a message on the answering machine, but she didn’t. Briefly she considered calling her husband, but she didn’t have the courage yet. What would she say? What would he say? If Nicole answered, it would destroy her, and just now Jane felt too fragile to deal with that kind of betrayal.
Her mother was an excellent housekeeper, but Jane went around picking up toys and straightening magazines, anything to keep herself occupied. The mail was on the counter and Jane saw that it contained a number of sympathy cards. She read each one, which renewed her overwhelming sense of loss and left her in tears.
Inside one of the sympathy cards was a letter addressed to her mother. Jane didn’t read it, although when she returned it to the envelope, she saw the name. Laurie Jo. Her mother’s best friend from high school. Laurie Jo Spencer was the kind of friend to her mother that Annie had always been to Jane. Lately, though, with Annie so busy dealing with the changes in her own life, they hadn’t talked nearly as much, Jane reflected sadly.
Laurie Jo had added a postscript asking Stephanie to join her in Mexico over the Christmas holidays. They were both recent widows, as well as old friends; they’d be perfect companions for each other.
Jane wondered if her mother would seriously consider such a trip and hoped she would. It sounded ideal. Her father’s health problems had started months ago, and he’d required constant attention and care. Stephanie was physically and emotionally worn out.
If her mother did take the trip, it’d be the perfect time for Jane to find her own apartment. That way, her moving out would cause less of a strain in their relationship. To this point, Stephanie had insisted Jane stay with her.
In another four weeks it’d be Christmas. Jane would have to make some decisions before then. Painful decisions that would force her to confront realities she’d rather not face. This lack of energy and ambition, living one day to the next, allowing others to lead her, was beginning to feel lik
e the norm. Beginning to feel almost comfortable. But for her own sake and the sake of her children, it couldn’t continue.
Jane glanced at the phone again. She dialed Dovie’s number, but there was still no answer.
She didn’t leave a message. It occurred to her that Dovie’s absence was really rather symbolic. There didn’t seem to be anyone or anything left for her in Promise, Texas.
Chapter Eight
Cal had never been much of a drinking man. An occasional beer, wine with dinner, but he rarely broke into the hard stuff. Nor did he often drink alone. But after six weeks without his family, Cal was considering doing both. The walls felt like they were closing in on him. Needing to escape and not welcoming company, Cal drove into Promise and headed straight for Billy D’s, the local watering hole.
The Christmas lights were up, Cal noticed when he hit Main Street. Decorations were everywhere—in store windows and displayed on every lamppost. Huge red-and-white-striped candy canes and large wreaths dangled from the streetlights. Everything around town looked disgustingly cheerful, which only served to depress him further. He’d never been a Christmas nut, but Jane was as bad as his mother. A year ago Jane had decided to make ornaments for everyone in the family. She’d spent hours pinning brightly colored beads to red satin balls, each design different, each ornament unique. Even Cal had to admit they were works of art. His wife’s talent had amazed him, but she’d shrugged off his praise, claiming it was something she’d always planned to do.
Last Christmas, Paul hadn’t quite understood what Christmas was all about, but he’d gotten into the spirit of it soon enough. Seeing the festivities through his son’s eyes had made the holidays Cal’s best ever. This year would be even better now that both children—the thought pulled him up short. Without Jane and his family, this Christmas was going to be the worst of his life.
Cal parked his truck outside the tavern and sat there for several minutes before venturing inside. The noise level momentarily lessened when he walked in as people noted his arrival, but then quickly resumed. Wanting to be alone, Cal chose a table at the back of the room, and as soon as the waitress appeared, he ordered a beer. Then another and another.
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