Not only did they want to ride the train they insisted that I ride the kiddie train along with them. I am glad I did it, the look on their faces as we rode through the villages was priceless. I took a few pictures with my phone to share with their mom.
Somehow we lose Alex. We walk inside the makeshift forest each boy holding one of my hands as we search for the perfect tree. Here I am making what I hope are great memories for them. Secretly, I mourn the loss of memories from my childhood. There were no pictures with Santa, trips to buy a real tree. Hell, most of the time there were no decorations in our place. I know I should get over it already, but sometimes it hurts thinking about the things we missed. Someday when my kids are big enough, we will go on the train and come to a tree farm just like this. I try to picture what their faces will look like in my mind. Will they have my blue eyes or brown like their father? My straight blonde hair or will theirs be curly? Is it odd that I’m thinking about that?
Why did you get a replantable tree?” Alex asks on the ride home.
“Colin wanted to know if he could keep the tree forever, there’s only one way to do that,” I explain. “I thought it might be fun to have a tree that you guys can plant for your dad in the yard. It will grow with those two back there to help them remember.” I offer.
“So, where were we before we were eh-hem interrupted?” His face reads I’m up to no good. As much as I’d like to take advantage of it, we have his brothers in the car. We need to show some self-control.
“AAAlex. I don’t want to be doing this with them in the car.” I protest.
“Shh, they’re asleep.” He whispers. “Besides I’ve never heard you complain before about me wanting to touch you.” Still attempting to get to third base.
“That is completely different, move your hand, and we will continue this later when it’s appropriate.”
Back at home, the boys jump into the house eager to tell their mom about the train ride, toys, and the tree. “I’m going to head inside and ask your mom where she wants us to put this thing,” I say.
“You know you have to help me get this tree down from here right,” Alex says to the pine strapped to the roof.
“Oh. I watched the guy put it on the roof and tie it down I thought it was a one-man job.” I grin and run into the house. It takes Alex, his mom and me to pull it down off the roof rack. Then Alex strong arms it into place.
Before long the warm space is filled with the fresh scent of pine. Alex gets sent into the garage for decorations giving his mom and my chance to chat. “How’s it going, Sophie?” His mom asks as we spread ice cubes around the tree.
“I’m almost done, thank you again,” I say.
“Are you sure I didn’t give you too many of our old films?”
“Nope, it is just the right amount of footage.” Her face is beaming. Little does she know I have a present in the works for her as well?
“I can’t wait to see it. I know Alex is going to love it.” She hugs me tightly then kisses my cheek.
“Sophie why are you putting ice cubes on the tree?”
“Well, ice cubes melt slowly and will help the tree stay alive longer since it’s not planted outside.”
“Can we take that brown thing off to see the tree guts?”
“No, we can’t do that if we mess with the roots, the tree might not make it when we plant it outside.”
“Do I get to name the tree? I want to call it Chase; he’s my favorite on Paw Patrol.”
“Sure, it’s your tree, and you can name it anything that you want.” Mrs. Matthews says.
Alex sits down the big box of decorations. His mom passes them out for everyone to hang, giving the unbreakable ones to the boys.
Once it’s all finished, we turn off the lights to inspect the tree. It’s a beautiful sight. A perfect ending to a beautiful day.
“We doing movies at your place tonight?” Alex asks me. “Sure.” His offer surprises me.
“Before we go I need to give your mom another big hug.”
“Thank you for everything Sophie.” She whispers in my ear. “Look out for my boy please.” She asks. I could feel that things were a little awkward between us today, maybe it’s nothing, but his mother’s words have me wondering.
“I got it covered Mrs. Matthews.” Alex comes over to hug his mom before we leave.
“No rush coming back Alex, I’m putting them to bed. Thanks to you two they had a wonderful day.”
**
“Alex where are you taking us?” I giggle knowing full well he’s taking me to the makeout spot in our area. Seated this high above everyone I’m able to see lights for miles. It’s beautiful.
I don’t protest when he pulls me close for kiss. We become a tangled mess of hands and lips. I don’t want it stop- ever.
“I love you Alex.”
“I love you too Sophie. I promise this is going to be the best Christmas break ever.”
4 CHAPTER sophie
“You came back terribly late last night,” Dad says to me as he reads the morning paper. From his tone, I can tell he’s teasing me, and he already knows where I was, but I’ll play along. “I went to see Alex last night.” He pulls down the corner of the paper to look over at my mother. The two share a look the way parents do when they have an opinion about children’s actions. God, I hope they don’t want a bunch of answers because I don’t even know exactly what all of this means. My mind replays the hot passionate kiss I shared with Alex and what almost happened afterward. Suddenly my teeth are gnawing on my bottom lip, and the room is getting warmer. Please, please don’t blush. I put my head in my hands and hope for a change of subject.
“That’s good; he can use some Christmas Cheer. “Dad says, then goes back to making breakfast. Mom pours me a glass of juice then hands it to me.
“So. Does this mean what I think it does?” Mom asks her brow arched. Instead of answering I press the glass to my lips and take a long drink.
“Well, you and Alex are back together.” Mom continues to stare, and soon I’m out of juice. I set the empty glass back down.
What am I supposed to say when I don’t know the answer?
“We never know what the future holds,” I say with a shrug.
“Oh, Sophie, why must you be so dramatic?” I know she’s trying to be helpful, but it’s not working.
“I haven’t even finished college yet,” I say in reply. Dad steps in to avert the conversation to something different. “Angie, would you like me to make you something?”
She looks at him and smiles, “Well, if you’re offering I think I’d like an egg with toast please.”
“As you wish my queen.” Dad jokes and kisses her hand. I feel a lump in my chest. My mind took me back to those early memories of my childhood and how important fairy tales were.
All my life she waited for the elusive prince, who would whisk us away to his castle. The man who was now my dad was a prince of his own right. He gave us something that we never had before; a place to call home. He puts my food on a plate, and I take it from him instead of letting him set it down on the table. “Thanks, I’m going to eat this in my room,” I say with a smile.
Before long, Alex will call. I need some time alone to think.
Mom went through several toads before meeting her prince. Is it possible that I could already have mine? How many people can say they found the one in high school?
My stomach turns in knots, and I’m no longer hungry. “C’mere boy.” I set the plate in front of Duke I squat down next to him and rub his head and down his sides. He finishes the food in a matter of seconds then licks my face. “Oh, you like that boy?” He rolls over and shows his belly to me, and I rub that too.
My phone chirps, “I gotta go, that’s probably Alex.” I say to him. Duke tilts his head to the side, his tongue sticking out while pondering what that means.
I let out an excited breath at seeing his name on the caller ID.
“Hey, Babe.” He says to me as soon as I answer. The use of that old term of endearment for me catches me off guard, and I pause before answering. Although my heart thuds thinking about how quickly those words I love you passed his lips. Caressing my heart with a touch smooth as silk, but this? I’m not too crazy about.
“Hey,” I say back not knowing what else to say.
“It’s Friday; you know what that means?”
“I don’t know what does it mean?” I ask when I get out of my head.
“It means, I have a therapy appointment and after that, I am yours for the weekend. Mom and the boys won’t be back until next weekend.” There’s a hint of playfulness and mischief in his voice.
“So what did you have in mind?” I say back letting him know that I’m pretty much open to suggestions.
“To spend every possible second with you before, you have to leave.” Man, he knows what words to say to give me all of those feels. I’m a total girl.
“I like the sound of that,” I say smiling into the phone... In the back of my mind hoping that means quality time to work things out.
“Good. Then get over here and you can chauffeur me around.”
“Any particular place you need to go?”
“Yes, I have a therapy appointment, but I swear it won’t take long.”
“Okay. I’ll be there in about fifteen minutes.” I’m immediately sad when we end our call knowing that it is already Friday and before we know it. Stop it Sophie. Just stop and enjoy the time you have.
It takes longer than I think to find something to wear. And pick a pale blue t-shirt that fits me well. Put on a pair of yoga pants and my sneakers assuming that if he has anything else planned that I would have an opportunity to come back and change. No time to obsess about my hair so I make a messy ponytail on the top of my head
When I get into the car, I push the button to turn on the radio and select the station playing 80s love songs. How fitting that when I pull into Alex’s driveway Peter Gabriel has me thinking of how I feel when I look into those brown eyes of the man I love. His looks say a thousand words. One look tells me I’m beautiful and to him, there is no one else but me. Each twinkle of the tiny green flecks makes me forget all my insecurities and fall deeper in love I know my heart says the same thing when I look at him.
“Hey, babe.” He immediately places a chaste kiss on my cheek when he gets in the car. Ah! That smell I want to bury my head in his chest. I breathe deep and enjoy as his cologne fills the car. “You are so amazing if only we could get you to quote time accurately.” He says.
I feel sorry. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to keep you waiting; you’re not going to be late are you?” Remembering the point of this is for me to take him to his therapy appointment. “No, it’s alright. I just converted it into girl minutes.”
“Girl minutes?”
“Yes. If you say 10-15 minutes. I know it’s more like 30-40.”
“Ow, what was that for?” he says when I take my hand off the wheel to smack his arm for the inference that being late is a girl thing.
“Well, I want to look nice for you,” I say with a huff.
“I like that you want me to like what I see, which I do.” He places a kiss on my hand. My heart does that swoony thud thing. How can you be upset when he does sweet stuff like that?
“Where to?” He’s still holding my hand; he uses it to pull me in for a quick kiss at the end he nips my bottom lip with his teeth. My brain goes to instant mush.
“The office is right across from the hospital.” I turn the key, and the car makes a god awful grinding sound. Duh, the car’s on Sophie. Alex laughs, “Ouch. Did you forget that the car was on?”
“No, you just have a knack for distracting me.” I turn the car around to head into town towards the hospital. We sit in silence for a while, so I turn the radio back up in time to hear my favorite song Faster.
“You make my heart beat faster” we sing in unison. Bubbly love emotions are spilling out of me, so I make a slight confession to Alex. “That song describes how I feel inside about you.”
“I feel the same way except it’s you. I love you so much Sophie; I don’t think I ever stopped.”
He pauses for a moment as I pull up to the medical center. “Sophie I want to ask you something.”
“Sure.”
“Do you think we can go back to just...?”
“The way things were?” I say filling in the rest of his sentence.
“I know I hurt you, but I’m asking if we can just have a restart without rehashing all the old stuff.”
“Alex I don’t know. I don’t want to give up on us.” He gets out of the car and leans back in.
Think about it. I’ll only be about 45 real minutes, and I’ll be back.”
“I’ll be right here Mr. Funnyman.” I turn the car off and lean my seat back. What should I do? My heart is already caught back up in being with Alex. I feel the need to define where we are at this moment, and I think in a strange way he just has. We can just go back to being us. I think back to graduation and the breakup, and play the if game.
What if he didn’t send that text? Would we have found a way to make things work with both us attending different schools? I’d like to say yes we would. It would be hard work, but we could do it. Compromise, isn’t that part of being an adult and having an adult relationship?
If life is like a game show now would be the time for the phone a friend option. Heidi didn’t have much to say last night other than she knew I would figure it out on my own.
“Told you that wouldn’t take too long. What do you want t to do now?” Alex’s face is grimacing, I know he has to be in pain. Knowing that I suggest something that will give him time to relax and stay off of it.
“You know what? I’d like to spend the day being lazy on the couch in front of the television.”
“Any one in particular?” My mind gives me an instant replay of last night’s events on his couch. I can’t say that I would mind having a repeat performance with him.
We make the final turn and pull up to Alex’s house. I sit on the couch while he moves around to get the ice pack and take some meds for the swelling. His phone starts to vibrate and slide down the coffee table. I want to pick it up to see who it is.
“Can you give me a hand with this?” He asks
“Sure.” I fold the pillows up and place them under his leg. He waits until he has the ice on before reaching over to grab his phone. He looks at that number frowns then sets it back down. Well, since he didn’t pick it up chances are it’s not his mother who is calling.
I want to ask, but feel this is something that should be left alone.
“How’s the leg been doing?” I angle myself so I can face him on the couch.
“Not too bad, the doctor says everything looks good and that in a week’s he’s going to put me in a brace.” Not knowing if that is good or bad I ask.
“Is that a good thing?”
“Yes. All part of the recovery process.” He says and stares at his phone again. It seems the caller isn’t taking the hint. I try to tilt my head back to see if I can see any of the screen, but it’s of no use.
“Hey open your door douche bag!” I hear Monte say. He has his face pressed up against the glass.
“Hope you don’t mind company, it seems Monte isn’t going to go away.” I jump up to open the door; it’s been so long since I’ve seen him.
“Hey, Sophie!” Monte grabs me so tightly he lifts my feet up off the ground making me squeal. “It’s so good to have you back among us.” He says then kisses me on the cheek. Alex is frowning again. “That’s enough of that” Alex says frowning. Monte being Monte grabs me and does it again. Seeing the jealous look on Alex’s face is funny. I go back over and sit down beside Alex and Monte takes a seat across from us. His eyes go from Alex to me then back to Alex. I look over to see what is going on, and there is some secret guy code or signal passing between the
m.
“So please tell me everything is set for you to join us for New Years Eve,” Monte quirked a brow at us. “What do you mean?” Alex says with a frown. “Really Alex? Let me see.” Monte pulls out his phone.
“Text from Alex, Dude I can’t figure out what to wear. Should I buy flowers for this?” He pauses then smiles at me.
“Several texts later from Alex. I don’t know what hurts more a broken knee or a broken heart. I say the heart because I know in time my leg will get better. Please tell me you two are never breaking up again because I’m tired of holding this guy’s hand while he cries over you.”
Monte opens his mouth to start again. “Say one more word and I’ll cut out your tongue after I break your face for kissing my girl.” Aww Alex is so cute and sweet. I lean across him to plant a soft kiss on his lips. Then I get up and give Monte a quick peck on the forehead. “Thank you for sharing that with me Monte.”
“Nice one Sophie now your guy is going to break my face for sure.”
“Don’t you worry about a thing Monte your face is safe.”
“Monte, don’t you need to go and do that thing?”
“What the thing is that?”
“You know... the...thing?” Alex jerked his head in the direction of the door.
“What’s up with your neck bro?” Monte asks showing genuine concern.
“Nothing. I’m trying to get you to leave.” Alex says.
“Dude I just got here besides, the three of us could hang out like old times. You need to relax Alex” And on that note, I decide to head to the bathroom.
“Please excuse me, boys.”
Monte continues to rib Alex about his messages. I know that I made the right choice and this holiday is going to be one of the many memories we share.
For now, I’ll do just that, relax. I’ll let go of it all and let us pick up where we left off.
5 CHAPTER Alex
Beads of sweat race down the back of my neck as I talk to Sophie’s dad about my plans for New Years and the future. We moved into his office where we could speak in privacy where little ears wouldn’t be able to hear and repeat.
Christmas in the City II Page 20
