by Barri Bryan
Margaret laid her head on the table and for a brief interlude allowed herself the luxury of tears. After several minutes she lifted her chin and wiped her face. Enough of this, she had a life, a perfectly good life, without Connal Cassidy. It wasn't as if she hadn't been through this before. Time would pass and she would forget this time just as she'd done before.
For all her words of wisdom and expressions of assurance Margaret found that forgetting was not that easy. Even though she managed to stay busy, the days passed in slow monotonous succession. The nights were even worse. Despite her resolve to forget him, Connal's memory lingered through those long nocturnal hours like an unwelcome guest.
In April Felicia married Flynn Taylor in a simple but moving ceremony. Even though she had little time to plan, Margaret managed a reception afterward and then saw the newlyweds off on a week's Caribbean cruise.
In May Todd graduated high school and promptly landed a job as a camp counselor for the summer. “It's a perfect summer job,” he told Margaret.” I will be home two days before I have to leave for college."
For the first time in years Margaret was alone. She spent the first two weeks in June wandering about the house, alternating cursing and crying. How could she have fallen for that same old line twice over? If Connal Cassidy ever showed his face in Summerville again she would.... Her mind hit a blank wall. What would she do?
"Don't think about it,” she told herself. “Do something constructive and worthwhile with all the time you have on your hands."
And then fate stepped in to give her a surprise that would alter her world and change her life forever. In mid June she paid a visit to Doctor Mackey hoping he could give her something for a persistent stomach virus and was shocked her to the core of her being when he told her she was almost three months pregnant.
Margaret couldn't believe it. During her affair with Connal and throughout her marriage to Patrick she'd never practiced any kind of birth control. Over the years she'd come to believe that she couldn't conceive. Without a doubt she'd been wrong.
After a period of vacillating between deep depression and euphoric happiness she sat down and seriously began to think about the future. Where did she go from here? From the onset she had known that abortion was not an option. That left only one recourse. She was going to have a baby.
But there were other considerations, did she stay in Summerville and brave the storm of gossip that would obviously result from Patrick O'Neil's widow being pregnant with a ‘love child'? Or did she pull up stakes and move to some other place?
Her first impulse was to run and hide and then she reassessed her position. Summerville was her home. She had no desire to leave. There were two other important considerations, namely Todd and Felicia. She was the nearest thing they had to a parent and Todd was still financially dependent on her. After much contemplation and many deliberations, she did the only thing she could do; she invited Felicia and Flynn to dinner, made sure Todd was present and over coffee and dessert, told them the truth. She was expecting a child in late December.
The reaction to her bombshell announcement both pleased and surprised her. Todd took the announcement in his stride. “Maybe he will be here by the time I'm home from college for Christmas vacation."
Felicia was clearly pleased. As she smiled she asked Todd, “What makes you think it's a boy?” Her smile vanished as she turned to Margaret. “Have you told Connal?"
Margaret shook her head. “No, and you'd better not either."
For the first time Flynn spoke. “He has a right to know, Margaret."
Margaret knew that all too well. “I'll tell him, in time."
"Just don't wait to long,” Flynn advised.
As the summer passed Margaret settled into a pleasant routine, her focus now was on delivering a healthy baby. She cut her work hours in half; she exercised and watched her diet. She also spent an inordinate amount of time thinking of Connal. Should she tell him about the baby before it arrived? She found so many excuses to postpone breaking the news to him. Deep in her heart she knew that the reason she didn't contact the father of her child was the fear that he'd reject both her and the baby.
In late August Todd said a hasty goodbye and rode off on his Harley, bound for college and an exciting new life. She would miss him, Margaret thought, as she watched him disappear around a bend in the road and then comforted herself with the thought that he'd be home for Thanksgiving.
In early September Doctor Mackey presented Margaret with yet another surprise. She was carrying twins. After the initial shock wore away Margaret discovered that she was pleased at the prospect of having two children instead of one. She began to turn Patrick's old study into a nursery.
In late October she learned one of her babies was a girl and the other a boy, Margaret was happier than she'd been in a long time.
That happiness came to an abrupt end Halloween night when she opened her door to what she thought were trick-or-treaters and saw Connal Cassidy standing on the other side. He looked handsome as sin, too sexy for words and very unsure of himself. Grabbing the door jamb she hung on. In an attempt to be flippant, she asked, “Where's your goody bag?"
Without invitation Connal pushed around her and came into the living room. “I brought C.J.'s master DVD.” Reaching into his inner jacket pocket he took out a flat, square plastic box and tossed it on the couch. “It's yours, you've earned it."
Margaret carefully lowered her oversized body down beside the box, picked it up and stared at it. “How many more of these are floating around somewhere?"
"Only the one you have.” Connal sidled across the room, sat beside her and scrutinized her carefully. “How do you feel?"
He looked so nervous and uncertain. Did he think she would make demands on him? She could soon disabuse him of that notion. “I'm coping quite well.” Staring down at her hands, she asked, “Who told you?"
Connal vaulted to his feet and walked across the room before turning to face her. “Actually it was my mother, she saw you at the shopping mall a month or so ago."
Margaret's voice tilted in surprise. “And she's just now getting around to telling you?"
"She didn't tell me until I called her two days ago just after a telephone conversation with Flynn Taylor."
Margaret echoed, “Flynn had no right to call you and blab."
"Don't be too hard on him.” Connal spread his hands. “He thought I already knew. He gave me a royal dressing down for not being here for you. When he hung up I called Mother."
"And that's when she told you?"
"She told me that and much more. I'm still smarting from her verbal thrashing. As soon as she hung up I began packing. I got to Mom and Dad's early this morning. I would have been over here sooner but there were some things that I had to straighten out with C.J. first."
Margaret's voice came out sounding very prim and proper. “What things?” Like a lightening flash it hit her. “So you know about my deal with C.J."
Connal cut his eyes in her direction. “I've known for a long time."
All at once everything fell into place. “And you think that I made love to you because of my stupid deal with your father?"
Connal's probing gaze swept over her face and stopped to stare at her much extended abdomen. “I don't know what to think. Did you?"
With some effort Margaret kept her voice steady. “I did make a deal with C.J. to detain you in Summerville as long as possible."
Raw pain shimmered in the blue of Connal's eyes as he bowed his head to stare at the floor. “I see."
"No, damn it, you don't.” Margaret hastened to add, “My deal with C.J. was not the reason I made love to you."
Connal's voice tilted in surprise as he raised his head and turned to stare at her. “It's not?"
"No, I made love to you because I was caught up in the magic of the moment. It would have happened if I had never made a deal with C.J."
Connal actually smiled. “That's not what I'd hoped you'd say but it sure bea
ts what I was afraid you'd say.” In one fluid movement he slipped to the floor, knelt before her and took her hand in his. “Will you marry me, Maggie love?"
Margaret gasped in surprise. “Are you out of your mind?” She pulled her hand from his as she said most emphatically, “No,” before adding on a kinder note, “Although it's very noble of you to ask."
Connal vaulted to his feet and stood staring down at her, “I'm not being noble. I want to marry you."
Margaret's first impulse was to say yes and to hell with the consequences. Then second thoughts kicked in. She was already in deep trouble as a result of acting on impulse. Patting the cushion beside her, she said, “Sit down.” Maybe it was time she reminded him of a few hard facts. “I am not going to LA to live and you aren't about to come back here."
"I would if you'd marry me."
He was not going to make this easy for her. “I won't, but you can see the babies when you like."
Connal eased down beside her. “You said babies?"
Margaret smiled. “Babies, there are two of them."
Connal caught his breath, “Twins?"
Margaret nodded, “Yes, a boy and a girl."
"If I calculate correctly they should be here around Christmas time.” He stood. “I'm moving in. My bags are in the car where do you want me to put them?"
Margaret raised one hand to object. “Connal, no.... “Then she reconsidered. Maybe a good dose of reality would wake him up and make his see things as they actually were. Dropping her hand she pointed, “Down the hall, the first door on the left."
Connal gasped in surprise, “Just like that?” His eyebrows climbed upward.
Margaret snapped her fingers. “Just like that, but this is not a permanent arrangement. Settle in, tomorrow you can help me rake and burn leaves.” She had expected him to protest. He didn't. Instead he grinned and replied, “I can do that."
Over the next six weeks Connal shouldered much of the responsibility of running the house. He also did much of the cooking. Margaret kept waiting for him to complain about all the hard work or to announce that he was leaving. He did neither. Slowly she relaxed and let herself take pleasure in having someone to take care of her. “Enjoy it while you can,” she told herself, “For once the babies put in an appearance, he will be gone again."
As the weeks passed, much to her surprise she discovered that she liked having Connal around. He was funny, witty, considerate and cheerful. There were times when she wanted to tell him how much she enjoyed his company. She could never quite bring herself to do that. Over and over she reminded herself that this was not a permanent arrangement.
Once the babies came, she would pick up the threads of her mundane existence again, and Connal could go back to his glamorous life as a soap opera star and fancy-free heartthrob.
On morning in mid December Margaret awoke with a pain in her back and stomach cramps. She dressed and got her suitcase before going to Connal's bedroom to awaken him. “It's time,” she told him as he sat up and stared at her.
In a flash Connal was out of bed and jumping into his clothes. “Should I call the doctor?"
A hard pain ripped through Margaret. As she bend double she gasped, “No time, just get me to the hospital."
With Connal's help, Margaret made it to the car.
Connal broke all speed records getting to the emergency room.
Margaret would later remember the next several hours as being long and pain-ridden. As the dawn of a new day was breaking across the eastern sky she gave birth to first a strapping baby boy and five minutes later to a fragile and beautiful baby girl. Her last thought as she drifted into a restful sleep was, at last, it's over.
Margaret woke around noon to see Connal standing beside her bed. Next to him was Eva and beside her C.J. Before she could speak, C.J. declared. “They're beautiful, both of them. Have you decided on names yet?"
Maybe the birth was over but Margaret had the feeling that her troubles were just beginning. Connal she felt sure she could handle, his interest would soon wane and he'd be gone again. But two doting grandparents was another story. “The boy is Dylan Riley and the girl is Amy Christine."
"Those are both lovely names.” Eva was positively beaming. “The little boy is the image of Connal.” She tugged at C.J.'s arm. “Let's go back and look at them again"
As they hurried from the room, Margaret shifted her steely gaze to Connal who was strangely silent. “How long have they been here?"
Connal shrugged, “Since last night.” Her unforgiving stare made him add, “I needed some moral support."
For the first time Margaret realized that the past few weeks couldn't have been easy for Connal and he'd borne up amazingly well. “It's over now, you can relax."
Connal hitched a chair near her bed and sat down. Out of the blue he asked, “When are you going to marry me?"
It was the last thing she expected him to say. A niggling thought worried its way into her brain. No doubt his parents were pressuring him to make Margaret his wife.
What better way to keep him in Summerville and in the process to assure them access to their grandchildren? Regret and nostalgic sorrow swamped her. She said what had to be said, “I can't marry you Connal, not now, not ever."
Chapter Twelve
Connal pulled his Lincoln Continental in a slot near the Summer County Community Center and set the brake. He'd sold his Ferrari just days after returning to Summerville. He wanted a family car that he could transport his twins and his wife around in; a hell of a lot of good it had done him. Since the twin's birth three months ago his parents monopolized the time Margaret allowed him with his children and she steadfastly refused to even talk about marrying him.
Well, all of that was going to change. Connal Cassidy was about to take command of the situation. Margaret had failed to invite him to her annual Saint Patrick's Day Dance. He was here anyway and about to once again crash her party. Getting out of the car he slammed the door and took brisk strides toward the building's entrance. God help anyone who tried to stop him from going inside.
Much to his surprise no one did. At the entrance to the ballroom he paused and took a round button from his pocket. Splashed across it in bold green letters were the words kiss me, I'm Irish. Pinning it on his lapel of his tuxedo, he began to make his way across the crowded dance floor. He had barely stepped onto the hardwood when a beautifully dressed very pretty young woman took him up on his offer. She was kissing him soundly when he felt a tap on his shoulder. He turned to see Margaret with her hands on her hips glaring at him. He smiled. “Hello, Maggie love."
"Don't you ‘Maggie love’ me. What are you doing here?"
Connal kept smiling even though he felt that his face might crack from the effort. “I was kissing a very attractive woman. Now I'm talking to you."
Margaret struggled visibly to control her anger. “Aren't you ever going to grow up?” Her words were calculated to infuriate him.
They did. His smile vanished to be replaced be a mask of grim determination. Grabbing her arm, he pulled her along with him. “You think I'm not a man?"
Margaret hurried to stay up with him. “That's not what I said. Connal, let me go."
Connal didn't loosen his grip or break his stride until he reached the ante room at the front of the ballroom. Opening the door he pulled Margaret inside and locked the door behind them before grabbing her upper arms and forcing her to face him. “All this foolishness is coming to a screeching halt.” He shook her gently. “Do you understand?"
Margaret pulled from his grasp. “If you don't behave I'll call security and have you thrown out of here."
Connal's eyes narrowed. “Try it, I dare you.” Before she could move he pulled her into his arms and kissed her, pushing his tongue into her mouth and swept inside with take-over authority.
She responded with passionate intensity before pulling from his embrace and placing one hand over her mouth. “Don't do this please."
"Why not, I love you Maggi
e and damn it, you love me too, I know you do."
Margaret found a chair and sat down. “That's not enough. Don't you see?"
It would have been so easy for Connal to succumb to her sweetness and fire. He held onto his resolve to be stern and demanding. In a voice that cracked with authority he said, “No, I don't see. It's high time you explained why you won't marry me."
"It would never work."
Connal was relentless, “Give me one good reason why not."
As she stood Margaret said, “I can give you two very good reasons why not. Number one is I can't compete with after all the glamorous women you've known, you'd be tired of me in six months and number two is I can't cope with two ex wives who are both still a very important part of your life."
Connal threw back his head and laughed uproariously.
Margaret asked cautiously, “What's so damn funny?"
"You are funny and stupid and so wrong. I've never known a woman who measured up to you, Maggie love. Maybe that's why I never stayed with any of them. Maybe that's why I came back here last year determined to renew our relationship."
Margaret's eyes widened. “Is that really why you came back last year?"
Connal nodded, “That's the only reason I came back."
"What about those ex wives who call you all the time?"
Connal bristled, “What about your dead husband who is still a big part of your life?"
Margaret argued meekly, “That's different. Patrick is dead."
Connal asked bluntly, “What about his children that you still nurture and care for?"
"I never thought of that."
"It's time you did. I can't erase my past any more than you can change yours.” Connal nodded toward the array of coats and jackets hanging on a rack behind them. “Get your wrap we're getting out of here."
Maggie came to stand directly in front of him. Tiptoeing she brushed his chin with her lips. “Kiss me first."
