Abe didn’t want to get caught up in another anti-Mort tirade, so he cut Helen off. “Which colleges are the letters from?”
“There was one from Barnard and another from Bryn Mawr.”
“Where’s that?”
“Honestly, Abe! Katharine Hepburn graduated from Bryn Mawr.”
“Oh well, if Katharine Hepburn went there, it must really be something!”
Helen rolled her eyes at him. “Those letters could be important.”
“You said yourself, she’s not even graduating this year—the girl hasn’t even applied. They’re just brochures.”
“They’re not brochures.”
Abe held up his hands in defeat. “All right, fine. Not brochures. I’m going to go wash up.”
An hour later at the dinner table, Abe stood up and tapped his fork on his water glass. “Your attention, please,” he said. “I have a family announcement.” Helen put down her fork but the boys kept on eating. “What’s a ’nouncement?” Natalie whispered to George.
“I don’t like to talk business at the dinner table, but I think it’s important for my family to know that Box Brothers is having a very good year. Last week Bob Sherman’s client sent us a five-year contract to become his exclusive supplier, not just for cereal boxes but a lot of other products they’re creating.”
“That’s wonderful, Abe!” Helen was beaming. She started to clear some of the serving plates and made a stack in the sink.
“Sure is,” he agreed. “But now we need a bigger factory to make all the boxes, and a different kind of machinery.”
“Are you looking for a new factory?” Harry asked.
“Now you’re paying attention!” Abe was pleased. “Actually, we already found one. It’s perfect—big enough and not expensive.”
“Where is it?” Joe wanted to know.
“Out on Long Island, not too far from where your uncle Sol lives.”
“Oh,” said George. “Are you going to see Uncle Sol when you work there?”
“Well, as it turns out,” Abe wiped his mouth with his napkin and placed it on the table, “we’re all going to see more of Sol.”
Helen was shuttling back and forth between the table and the sink now, grabbing glasses and silverware, even though the boys were still eating. “Is he going to be working with you?”
“Sol and me?” Abe shook his head and chuckled. “You really think Sol would want to work at Box Brothers? Nah, we’re not going into business with him. We’re going to be neighbors!”
Helen stopped short, the last of the glasses still in her hand. “What did you say?”
“Neighbors!” Abe grinned. “We’re moving! We’re going to buy a house ten minutes from Sol.” Helen said nothing, so Abe went on, “I went looking with a realtor the other day and I asked her to show me some houses; I told her I only wanted to see ones with a big room by the front door. Whaddya call that thing again?” He turned to Helen. “Right where you walk in?”
“A foyer,” Helen whispered. She was still holding the glass. In a flash, she remembered the day she first met Rose, on the front steps of the two-family house, almost nineteen years earlier. Helen hadn’t been thrilled when Abe first told her they were going to share the house with Mort, but the brothers had purchased it together for a price they couldn’t pass up. She had been pregnant with Harry, and they needed more space.
A few weeks after they had moved in, Mort met Rose. He didn’t tell them much about her, but Helen knew he was in love. Nothing else could explain the way he looked at Rose that day on the steps. Helen had met them coming up as she was walking down with Abe, on a cloudless Sunday afternoon in the middle of spring. She would never forget Rose’s sweet smile, the way she congratulated them on the baby, complimented them on the house. She was beautiful and gentle, and Helen wanted to be her friend. She remembered thinking that if Rose married Mort, sharing the house wouldn’t be so bad after all.
Abe snapped his fingers, shattering her reverie. “That’s it! A ‘foyer.’ I told the real estate agent I would only buy a house with a nice big foyer because that’s what my wife always wanted.” Abe walked over to Helen and tried to put his arm around her, but she moved to the sink, turned the glass over and slammed it down, hard. A tiny crack ran its way up from the rim.
“Does it have a television?” Sam interrupted.
Abe laughed. “That’s what you want to know? Any house can have a television, Sam. We could have a television here.”
“Then can our new house have a television?”
“We’ll see. Stop asking about televisions. The big news is that we’re moving!”
“I don’t want to move!” Natalie announced loudly. “I don’t want a new house. Everyone will be strangers.”
“They won’t be strangers once you know them,” Sam scolded her. “Besides, at least you don’t have to worry about changing schools. You don’t even go to school yet!” He turned to Abe. “Jeez, Dad. I was gonna have Mr. Ketterer next year—he’s the best teacher in the whole school! And now we’re gonna have all new teachers and have to make all new friends.”
“What if no one likes me at the new school?” George wailed, panicking.
“They’ll like you fine, George,” Abe insisted.
“This whole thing is a bunch of crap!” Joe got up from the table, eyes flashing. “You didn’t even ask us if we wanted to move. This is crap!”
“Joe!” Helen shouted. “Don’t speak to your father that way! This conversation is over. Go to your room. In fact, all of you go to your rooms. Now.”
“I didn’t even say anything,” Harry muttered.
“Now,” Helen repeated. The five of them filed out of the kitchen, worried looks on their faces.
Abe was deflated. Everyone was upset and Helen wouldn’t even look at him. He knew the kids would take some time to get used to the idea, but why wasn’t Helen more excited? How many times had she told him they needed more bedrooms and closets? How many nights had she complained about car horns and truck engines waking her up? For Chrissake, hadn’t he specifically told the realtor he would only look at houses with foyers just to make her happy? And even if you took away the foyer, the space and the yard, he couldn’t believe she wasn’t excited about not having to live in the same house as Mort, for once! He would have thought she’d move anyplace just for that privilege alone!
Was she angry that he hadn’t spoken to her about the move beforehand? Did she have reservations about living closer to Sol? If she wouldn’t even look at him, how was he supposed to figure it out?
“Look, Helen, if you’re angry because I haven’t shown you the houses yet, I’m sorry. I wanted to surprise you. But I didn’t buy one yet. There are three or four of them we can look at and then you can make the decision. We’ll get the one you like best.”
Helen was standing at the sink with her back to him. When she turned on the faucet, he could see that her hand was shaking.
“Helen? Look at me. Please.”
Helen mumbled something, but he could barely hear her over the running water.
“Helen, I can’t hear you. Turn off the water, sweetheart, and talk to me.”
When she finally did turn around, Abe barely recognized her. Her eyes were swollen, her cheeks were flushed and her lips were twisted tight in a grimace. She forced her mouth open to speak, but the only sound that emerged was a high-pitched wail. He had never seen her like this.
Abe tried to take her into his arms but she pushed him away, her back up against the sink, her arms wrapped around herself as if she were trying to get warm. “I don’t understand,” he told her, “Why are you so upset? Please, honey, tell me.”
“I can’t explain.…” She choked out the words in a tangle of sobs.
Abe softened his voice. “I promise you,” he said, “I promise you it will be all right.” He put one hand on her shoulder. “I know it’s a big change, but we’re going to have a wonderful new house for our family.” She let him take her in his arms then, and
wept like her heart was breaking. His shirt was soaked through in moments.
After a few minutes Helen lifted her head. “What about Mort and Rose?” she whispered.
“Mort is telling them tonight,” he told her. “He already picked a house. But there’s nothing else for sale on that street so we’ll be a few blocks away.” He tried to make his voice sound playful. “So cheer up—at least they won’t be next door!” He thought this would make Helen smile. He wanted to hear her laugh. But the tears only fell faster and her grip on him tightened.
Chapter 29
HELEN
Helen was still shaken the next day. After she got the boys off to school, she was unable to follow her usual morning routine. The dirty breakfast dishes nauseated her. The unmade beds gave her chest pains and the globs of toothpaste on the bathroom counter left her head aching. She needed fresh air, an escape from the drudgery of the morning cleanup. So she left it all—the dishes, the beds, the bathroom—and got Natalie ready to go to the park.
Once there, Helen showed Natalie how to feed the ducks with the stale bread they brought from home. Natalie watched the birds and mimicked their gait. They had been there for half an hour when Helen spotted Rose and Teddy walking through the park gates. Teddy saw Natalie and ran over. Rose had no choice but to join Helen.
“You must have gotten out of the house early this morning.” Rose brushed a few leaves off the bench and sat down.
“I couldn’t face the breakfast dishes,” Helen admitted. It had been a long time since she and Rose had sat together in the park like this.
“That’s not like you.”
“I know. Did Mort tell you about the move?”
Rose nodded, and Helen’s eyes filled with tears. She searched for a tissue in her handbag. “I can’t believe it. I don’t want to leave the house.”
“I do.” Rose’s voice was hard.
“But it’s perfect. The kids can see each other every day. Look at them. They’re like brother and sister! Living in the same house makes it so much easier. I can see Teddy and you can see Natalie whenever we want. Why do you want to leave?”
“Do I really have to list the reasons for you? It’s too small, for one. You and your family are literally on top of us every minute of every day.”
“We’ll switch. You can take the top apartment. I’ll convince Abe, he won’t mind—” Helen was pleading with her. Desperate.
“Listen to yourself, will you? Even if we moved to the top floor it wouldn’t solve anything. It wouldn’t change the situation.”
“What situation?”
“Stop it!” The children looked over from their spot on the miniature bridge that crossed over the pond. They had gotten tired of chasing the ducks and were dropping their crumbs now from the bridge into the water. Rose lowered her voice. “Stop acting like you don’t know what I’m talking about. This move will be the best thing for all of us. If we have more breathing room we’ll all get along better. Abe and Mort too.”
It was warm for April, but Helen pulled her sweater over her shoulders. She was shivering. “But we won’t even be on the same street. You and I won’t see the children. Days could go by without us seeing them … weeks.”
“I know.”
“I can’t stand the thought of not seeing Teddy every day. Don’t you want to see Natalie?” Helen beseeched her, but Rose was unmoved. After a few moments she took Helen’s hand, just like she used to, back before the babies were born, back when they were still like sisters. “I need to do this, Helen,” she said. “I don’t know how much longer I can continue on this way, all of us in one house. Some days I feel like I’m losing my mind. Please don’t try to stop this. Please.”
Helen nodded then—a barely perceptible movement. Still, she knew Rose had seen it because the next instant, Rose let go of her hand. She dropped it swiftly, with complete disregard, as if it were the hand of a stranger or of someone unclean.
Chapter 30
JUDITH
In the excitement surrounding her father’s big announcement, Judith forgot about the letters. It was only when she was in science class the next day and took out her textbook that she saw them in the bottom of her book bag. Her heart began to pound. Should she open them at school? No, it would be safer to wait until later, at the library.
In a few hours she was back upstairs in the dusty reading room, basking under the murkiness of the lone fluorescent bulb. She settled herself at one of the empty round tables and pulled out the letters.
Other than an occasional birthday card from a distant relative, Judith rarely received mail. Seeing her name typed across the creamy white envelopes was a thrill in itself, so for a few minutes she was content just looking at them. No matter what they contained, she was buoyed by the knowledge that she was important enough to receive letters like these, and that somewhere, someone in a college admissions office knew her name and cared enough to write to her. Her name was on a list, and whether the list meant rejection or acceptance, in the moments before she opened the envelopes she was overcome with relief that she existed somewhere outside the boundaries of her everyday life and that her name and person were as indisputably real as anyone else’s.
But relief didn’t satisfy for long. Soon she was tearing at the envelopes. Barnard was first. We are delighted to offer you admission to Barnard College as a member of the class of 1956.… Next, Bryn Mawr: It gives us great pleasure to inform you that your application for admission has been approved.…
She read and reread the letters, looking for some sign of trickery or fraud. Were they real? Did this mean she could go to college? What should she do now? Who should she tell?
Judith’s initial thought was to bring the letters to Mrs. Morhardt, but it was Friday, and she wouldn’t see the school counselor until Monday morning. She could tell Harry, but she was still feeling guilty about lying to him the day before. Of course her parents would have to be told. She hadn’t told them she was applying to colleges. She hadn’t mentioned that graduating early was even a possibility. What would they think? The library clock read 5:03. She’d find out soon enough.
At dinner everyone was still talking about the news from the night before. What did the new house look like? Were there other children in the neighborhood? Would they walk to school or take a bus?
Judith was surprised by how happy her mother seemed about the move. There was something about the way she acted that reminded Judith of the months right before Teddy was born. Her mother had been so hopeful then. Maybe the move was just what she needed. Maybe her worrying would stop when they were living outside of Brooklyn.
There was even talk of her mother learning to drive.
“You do have a good sense of direction, Rose,” her father said, rising from the table. Judith’s mother smiled at him as if he had just said the most romantic thing in the world. I suppose now is as good a time as any, Judith thought. When her siblings left the kitchen she cleared her throat. “May I please speak to you both? It’s important.”
It was not common for Judith to ask for an audience. Her father nodded and sat back down.
“I need to show you something.” Judith got up from the table to retrieve the two letters and then placed them in front of her father.
Mort inspected the envelopes. He read the first letter carefully, then turned his attention to the second. Judith waited for him to smile, to congratulate her, but he didn’t. He passed the letters to Rose and asked, “Did you know about this?” Her mother shook her head no, her expression unreadable.
“Why didn’t you tell us about this earlier?” Mort demanded. Judith was surprised by the severity of his tone.
“The letters just came yesterday.”
“Is there anything else you’d like to share?”
“I don’t understand—”
He was impatient. “Are you expecting any more letters?”
“No.”
“These are the only colleges you applied to?”
“Yes.”
“No one. Well, the school counselor, Mrs. Morhardt. She’s the one who encouraged me to graduate early and to apply to colleges.”
“You didn’t think it was important to tell us?”
“I didn’t think it would amount to anything. I didn’t think they would accept me.”
“You purposefully deceived us.”
“No! I didn’t tell you because—”
“Because you didn’t want us to know.” Her father punctuated the sentence with a bang of his fist. The table shook with the force of the blow and Judith pushed her chair back a few inches. She had known that her parents might not react the way she wanted them to. She had anticipated that they might object to her going to school in Pennsylvania. But she always assumed they would be proud of her. She would be the first of their family to graduate from college. Weren’t they supposed to be excited?
“I wanted to surprise you,” she said, “the way you surprised us with the moving news.” This wasn’t entirely true, but it wasn’t a lie. Still, one look at her father told Judith that she had said the wrong thing. He looked like he was about to explode.
“Do you understand how embarrassing this is? That our daughter went behind our backs without our permission?”
“But I didn’t do anything wrong! You’re making it sound like I committed a crime!”
Judith’s mother finally chimed in. “How could we let you move all the way to Pennsylvania? You’re only seventeen years old!”
“But I wouldn’t be living by myself. I’d be in a dormitory with supervision and curfews.”
“A curfew does not take the place of a mother.”
“Of course it doesn’t, I’m just trying to explain—”
“You can explain to Mrs. Morhardt, then, on Monday morning,” Mort interrupted. Judith did not like the tone of finality in his voice. What had he decided?
“What should I tell her? She thinks I’m graduating.”
“Then tell her you’ll be graduating. And that you will be joining your cousin Harry at City College in the fall.”
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