by Jenna Harte
“Ah, Sydney. What you do to me.” His words encouraged her, made her feel a feminine power she’d never felt before.
“Tell me.”
He jerked and brought his gaze to hers. A feral desire danced in his eyes. “I’ll show and tell.”
Her heart rate jumped, thrilled at what his eyes and words promised. In a rush, they removed the last of their clothes. She barely had her panties off when he hauled her over him to straddle his hips, his arms banding around her, as his head bent, taking the taut peak of her breast between his lips.
A long hiss escaped her lips. Each tug of her breast sent sensations straight to her center. Need built and coiled, tighter and tighter, until she couldn’t think of anything but having him inside her. She wrapped her legs around him and used them to move her pelvis closer to satisfaction. Reaching between them, she wrapped her fingers around him.
“You make me want you, Syd. God, how I want you.” He kissed her again. It was nearly perfect, if only she could complete the bond. She shifted her hips again. Ready to beg if she had to.
His hands went to her hips and guided her.
“Mitch.” The moment was almost there.
He swore and pushed her hips back. She protested with a groan and fought to regain her position.
“I need you.” Her words tore out of her in a frustrated groan.
“Condom.”
She barely heard him, his voice was so strained and harsh. He tried to disentangle their bodies, and she stopped him.
“Sydney.” He let out a growl, his head dropping to her chest, as he heaved in breaths.
She was on the pill, and for several beats, she was ready to throw caution to the wind. She loved and trusted him. Believed him when he’d said he’d used a condom with the other women he’d been with. Somehow, the urgency subsided enough so she could focus on him. She framed his face with her hands, capturing his gaze with hers. Would he see she loved him? Feel that she loved him? Recognize that she trusted him?
His green eyes clouded with desire, and for a moment, she thought he understood. But his hands held her hips firmly away from where they desperately wanted to be.
“Not in the throes of passion.” His teeth gritted, and with a growl, he reached for his pants.
He was right, of course. As a doctor, she ought to know better. And yet, her love, her trust in him, was soul deep
His hands shook as he sheathed himself. His fingers threaded her hair and he pulled her lips to his in a scorching kiss that seared all her senses.
“Take what you want, Syd.” He murmured as his lips trailed down her neck, until they found purchase on the hard pearl of her breast.
“I want you.” She arched, offering herself, relishing the magnificent things his mouth was doing to her. She wished he understood her desire for him was more than sexual release. She settled over him and slid down, until he filled her. The feel of him inside her, pulsing, throbbing, was a perfection she’d never experienced, not even during their relationship in college.
She wished she could savor the moment, but her body was too impatient, too greedy. She couldn’t wait any longer. She rocked against him, her body massaging his thick arousal as her orgasm built and readied.
“I can feel you.” His erotic words made her clench again, causing his breath to hitch. One of his hands slid from her hip over her thigh. “I want to feel you come around me, Syd.”
Yes ran like a mantra through her mind. His thumb dipped between her thighs and brushed over her sensitive nub.
“Come for me, Syd. Come hard.”
His thumb pressed, his lips suckled her breast, but it wasn’t needed. His words alone rocketed her to the stars, her release like a starburst, a flash of light radiating to every neuron in her body. She cried out, her hips moving of their own volition to draw out the pleasure. The friction of him, hard, hot, and sliding in and out.
As she came down from the high, she was vaguely aware he hadn’t joined her. She opened her eyes to find him watching her, a mixture of awe and something else she couldn’t identify, but hoped was love. Before she could ask him if he was okay and why he hadn’t come, he rolled her underneath him. His body spread over hers, covering her completely, lying skin to skin, heat to heat.
“You’re so beautiful.”
“Careful. You keep looking at me like that and I might think I matter to you.”
He dipped his head and kissed her, soft and tender. It was in contrast to the desperate, needy kisses he usually gave. His lips trailed from her mouth, along her jaw to her ear. “You matter.” He took her hands and lifted them over her head, holding them there palm to palm.
He started to move, slow, smooth, and delicious. His green gaze held hers, filled with an emotion she was afraid she was reading wrong. Maybe it wasn’t love. But it was something more than casual. Tears built, but she blinked them back, not wanting him to think something was wrong.
“Come for me again.” He kissed her and moved in and out of her. His hands flexed and gripped hers. Not even when they’d been together in college had sex been so intense and emotional. Because this wasn’t sex. He was making love to her. She made love back, matching the movement of her hips to his, in a dance uniquely theirs. She kissed him with equal parts love and desire. She gripped his hands and held them tight. She focused on the feel of him, sliding in and out, the friction building and building, feeling him grow and lengthen inside her.
“Sydney. Come.” His breath was harsh as his hips picked up the pace.
She’d give him anything. Anything. She shifted, tilting her hips so when he drove in, he hit that one exquisite spot. And when he did, she let herself go. Her orgasm washed through her like the spring storm outside: clean, intense, and beautiful.
She was still riding the storm when Mitch let out a feral growl and pumped deep, hard, and fast until he collapsed on her. She held him and knew it was hopeless to try and pretend she could keep herself from loving him. Instead, she placed a kiss on his cheek and gave herself over to him — body, heart, and soul.
Sydney was completely boneless and blissfully happy. The only fly in the ointment, as southerners would say, was that she couldn’t tell him what was in her heart.
“You okay?”
She turned her head, Mitch’s dazzling green eyes, sated and beautiful, stared back at her as they lay side by side on the floor of his living room.
She nodded, too spent to manage speaking.
He rolled to his side, his hand stroking down her abdomen. When her eyes widened, he laughed. “We’ll rest. I just like touching you.”
“I like you touching me.”
He watched his hand as he grazed it over her nipple, which hardened again.
“I’m on the pill.”
“I figured that, when you were about to ravish me without protection.” He smiled. “But, it seemed smarter to make that decision when we weren’t so desperate.”
“You’re right. Thank you for maintaining a level head.” Although she couldn’t stop the feeling that maybe his decision was because he didn’t trust her or didn’t want to be with her long term. A man who didn’t want commitment with a woman wouldn’t want to risk her having his child.
“I’m clean and I can get records to prove it.”
She smiled, running her fingers through his bronze waves. “I can get them too.”
He nodded. “Until then, I’m going to get my box of condoms and bring them out here.”
“A campout?”
“It’s a perfect night for one.”
“Before we get to using all the condoms in your box.”
He grinned at her and waggled his brows, making her laugh.
“Did you learn anything today about who attacked Jenny?”
He sighed. “No. I have someone looking at traffic cams to see if there were any suspicious vehicles. Nothing was left at the scene, and Jenny hasn’t remembered anything significant. Detective Fletcher hasn’t shared anything new from his end, but he said he’d go
back and look at Doctor Singer.”
“So it will be like before? It won’t be solved?” Her chest tightened at the thought she’d have to continue to look over her shoulder, and possibly put people she cared about in danger.
His fingers caressed her face, pushing a tendril of her hair behind her ear. “I’ll keep looking.” He took a deep breath. “But I’ll need to talk with Patrick and Jagger again.”
She bit her lip, hating that Patrick would be subjected to another interrogation. She couldn’t even bring herself to believe Jagger wanted to hurt her.
“I thought they had alibis.”
“They’ve told me what they were doing, but now I’m going to push. I’ll work to see if we can verify or disprove Patrick was wondering around Washington. Jagger will be harder, as I don’t think there’s anyone else on the farm. But maybe a neighbor drove by or the mailman saw him there.”
“What if it’s not them? What if it’s someone I don’t know?” She didn’t want to cry, but her chest constricted as panic took root.
“Syd.” Mitch pulled her against him, and like a balm, it soothed. “I won’t let anyone hurt you.” He pulled back, his sharp green gaze intent on her. “I promise.”
She knew that wasn’t a promise he could keep, but the determination she saw in his eyes made her feel better. She nodded. “Okay.”
His gaze swept over her face, lingering on her lips before returning to her eyes. “You matter, Syd.”
Oh, how she wished he meant, “I love you, Syd.” But she’d take it. And she’d take him for as long as he’d have her.
Chapter Seventeen
The next morning, Sydney woke on the floor. Disoriented, her eyes fluttered open and the memory of the night before came back to her, leaving her disappointed Mitch wasn’t there. The smell of bacon clued her in that he was making breakfast. The T-shirt Mitch had lent her the night before lay on the arm of the couch, and she smiled that he would have thought of leaving it there for her. She put it on and made her way to the kitchen.
“Hey.” His smile stunned her.
“Hey.”
“I didn’t want to wake you, but after last night, I was starving.” He waggled his brows, heating her body with desire to repeat all the sensuous things they’d done during the night.
“It smells delicious.”
“Bacon is one of the main food groups.”
She smiled knowing most people agreed. Of course, after eating it, she’d need to burn off the calories. Did they have time for Mitch to help her with that? Thinking of time, she remembered she needed to stop by her place to pick up her mail.
Before she could talk to Mitch about it, she was in his arms and he was kissing her senseless.
“Good morning.”
Breathless, she looked at him. “Good morning.”
“Did you sleep okay? I guess we fell asleep on the floor. It’s not very comfortable.”
“It’s not, but you are.”
He grinned, gave her a quick kiss, and went back to cooking breakfast. It was all very domestic, and she couldn’t remember being happier. Her ability to guard against thoughts of living in bliss with Mitch was completely gone. She knew she could get hurt and knew it would destroy her, but her love was no match for good sense. So, she had to put her faith in him and hope he could see that all they’d once dreamed of could still become reality.
Mitch helped her burn off the bacon calories while they showered. It took longer than expected, and she wasn’t able to get her mail before work. No matter. She’d stop by after.
Sydney breezed through her day, finding joy in telling a young couple they were pregnant and wondering if she’d ever have that joy with Mitch. The only blight in her life was the fact someone was out to get her. She hoped Mitch would be able to discover who it was before she or someone else was hurt again.
After work, Mitch drove her from the hospital to her place. She grabbed a few more clothes, wishing she had something seductive to pack. Maybe she’d find a lingerie store on the weekend. She stopped by her mailbox. Her box was filled, a large manila envelope taking up most of the space. Eager to get back to Mitch’s place, she stuffed the mail in her purse and went back to her car.
“Got everything you need?” He leaned against his truck, waiting for her outside her place.
He was so handsome, his green eyes shining at her. It stole her breath.
“Yes.”
He smiled, helped her in the truck and drove back to his home. This time she cooked dinner. They talked like they used to, and she felt as close to him as she had before. Did he feel the same? He never said so, but he wasn’t as guarded. It could be wishful thinking, but she wanted to believe it was love or at least affection shining in his eyes.
Friday morning, Sydney woke in her favorite place, Mitch’s arms. She was in trouble if she was wrong about his feelings, because she was irrevocably in love with him. All she wanted to do was live the rest of her days going to sleep and waking in his arms. Maybe they’d add a few children to the mix, children with his bronze hair and green eyes.
“What are you doing for lunch?” Mitch stood in the doorway of her office. She’d done her rounds at the hospital while Mitch had gone to visit Jenny, and he’d surprised her by showing up at her office after.
“No plans.”
He stepped into her office, shutting the door. He walked to her, pulled her from her chair, and kissed her.
“That’s a solid-looking desk you have there.” His words reverberated against her neck. As if to show her, he pushed her back until the desk pressed against her backside. He lifted her, set her on the desk, and then stepped between her legs.
“Why, officer!”
“It’s detective.” His hands slid up her legs, under her dress. “How about it? Lunch here?”
A surge of excitement shimmered through her body. “Yes.”
He pressed his palms to her cheeks. “I can’t seem to get enough of you, Doc.”
She smiled, hoping against hope his words were a declaration of something beyond an affair.
He stepped back and put her dress back in place. “I’ll see you at lunch.”
It took a few minutes for Sydney to get the fog out of her brain. Once she did, she started her day.
Her 11:40 appointment cancelled, so Sydney went to her office. Was she really going to make love to Mitch on her desk? Her cheeks heated at the idea. She knew the nurses and staff left for lunch, while the office closed for the hour. The other doctors usually did rounds. Her heart rate sped up. The old Sydney would never have had sex anywhere but in bed, and certainly not away from home. The only exception had been an interlude in a hot tub with Mitch during college. The idea of it thrilled her, even as it made her nervous. Mitch was whittling away all her inhibitions.
She decided to freshen up for his visit, pulling her purse from the bottom drawer of her desk. She opened it, looking for her compact, when she saw her mail. Thoughts of Mitch had distracted her, and she’d forgotten it. The bills could wait, so she pushed them aside. She looked at the manila envelope, recognizing the perfect handwriting of her mother. A shiver of anticipation ran up her spine. The five letters she sent were bound with a rubber band, organized by postmark, first to last. Sydney’s organizational skills clearly came from her mother. The first two envelopes had the most heft. By the last envelope, the letters were light, as if they were filled with only a single piece of paper.
She opened the first envelope, grateful that, while her mother had hidden them, she hadn’t read them. She unfolded the paper and a hard object fell out. Her engagement ring. Her breath hitched. It was a basic gold band with a single, small diamond. But the love it had represented was huge. When Mitch proposed, it had been the happiest day of her life. A few months later, it was over.
She remembered when Mitch told her if she couldn’t marry him when he got back from boot camp, then it was over. Stunned and angry, she’d given him the ring. She remembered being in a fog when she’d done it and regre
tting it to the point that she’d nearly chased his plane down the runway to get it back.
She slipped it on to test it. It was a little tighter but still fit. Tears filled her eyes as she looked at the diamond once again sitting where it should have been for the last ten years. Not wanting to be caught with it on, she removed it and put it back in the envelope. Then she opened the letter.
* * *
Sydney,
I’ve been trying to contact you, but my calls and e-mails aren’t going through. I know you’re mad, and you have every right to be. I was an idiot. I was feeling bad about being away from you and then you said you wanted to postpone the wedding, and I got angry and hurt. I said things I didn’t mean. I’m sorry. I wish I were there to make it up to you. I will make it up to you when I get back.
I don’t want to wait years to get married, but if you want to postpone the wedding for a little while, I’ll go along with it. Please put the ring back on and say you’ll marry me.
- Love, Mitch
* * *
Sydney closed her eyes. She’d known the letters would say something like this, but to see the words in his handwriting made her heart ache.
She opened the second letter dated three weeks after the first.
* * *
Syd,
Did you get my last letter? Are you angry and ignoring me? Have you given up on me? Please say you forgive me. I love you. I always will.
* * *
The letter went on to describe his day and all the stuff he’d have shared if they hadn’t broken up. But, at the end, he apologized again and asked for her forgiveness.
She sat back, guilt filling her, even though it wasn’t her fault that she hadn’t responded. She was afraid to read the remaining letters, knowing that as they went on, his words would become angrier.
There was a tap on her door.
“Lunch is here.” Mitch poked his head in with a seductive grin and twinkle in his eye.
