questioned whether it was really he.
"Beau? What is it?"
"It's Gisselle. We're at the ranch. We've been
here for more than a week now."
"Oh," I said. "She knows about us, then?" "No, that's not it," he replied.
I held my breath. "What then, Beau?" "She was bitten by mosquitoes. We thought
nothing of it. She complained like crazy, of course,
but I rubbed alcohol on her and forgot it. Then. . ." "Yes?" My legs felt as if they might turn to air
and float out from under me.
"She started to have these severe headaches.
Nothing I gave her helped. She took nearly a bottle of
aspirin. She had a fever, too. Last night the fever went
way up and she was hallucinating. I had to call the
doctor from the village. By the time he arrived, she
was paralyzed."
"Paralyzed!"
"And she was babbling incoherently. She
couldn't remember anything, not even who I was," he
said, amazed.
"What did the doctor say?"
"He knew what it was immediately. Gisselle has contracted St. Louis encephalitis, an inflammation of the brain caused by a virus mosquitoes transmit to
people."
"Mon Dieu," I said, my heart thumping. "Is she
in the hospital?"
"No," he said quickly.
"No? Why not, Beau?"
"The doctor said the prognosis is not good.
There is no known treatment of the disease when it is
transmitted by viral infections other than the herpes
simplex virus. Those are his exact words."
"What does this mean? What will happen to
her?"
"She can remain in this condition for some
time," he said in a voice devoid of any feeling, a voice
drained and lost. And then he added, "But no one back
in New Orleans knows about it yet. In fact, only this
doctor and some servants here are aware of what's
happened, and they can be persuaded not to talk about
it."
I held my breath. "What are you suggesting,
Beau?" "It came to me just a little while ago while I
stood by her bedside and watched her sleep. When
she's asleep, she looks so much like you, Ruby. No
one would question it."
My heart stopped and then began to pound so
hard, I thought I would lose my breath and
consciousness. I shifted the receiver to my other ear
and took a deep breath. I knew what he was
suggesting.
"Beau . . you want me to assume her identity?" "And become my wife now and forever," he
said. "Don't you see what an opportunity this is?" he
asked quickly. "None of the secrets of the past have to
be revealed and no one has to be hurt."
"Except Paul," I said.
"What good is it if we're all unhappy?" Could we do this? I wondered, my excitement
building. Would it be wrong?
"What will happen to Gisselle?"
"We'll have to institutionalize her, secretly, of
course. But it won't be hard to do."
"That's terrible. You remember when Daphne
tried to do that to me," I said.
"That was different, Ruby. You were alive and
well and had your whole life ahead of you. What
difference will it make to Gisselle? She has
accidentally given us a gift, repaired so many wrongs
she has committed. Fate wouldn't hand us this
opportunity if Fate didn't want to right the wrongs, too. Come to me," he pleaded. "With you I can restore my troubled soul and become someone I can respect again. Please, Ruby. We can't waste a moment of this
chance."
"I don't know. I have to think." I turned and
looked toward the study. "I have to talk it over with
Paul."
"Of course, but do it right away and call me
back," he said, and gave me the telephone number.
"Ruby, I love you and you love me and we should be
together. Destiny has come to realize that, too. Who
knows? Maybe your grandmere Catherine's at work
someplace in the hereafter or maybe Nina Jackson's
cast a spell for us."
"I don't know, Beau. It's all happening so fast.
It's complicated."
"Talk it over with Paul. It's right; it's good. It's
what was meant to be, finally," he said.
After we hung up, I stood there, my heart still
pounding very hard and quickly. The possibilities
loomed before me as well as the dangers. I would
have to assume my sister's identity, become Gisselle,
but we were so unalike, really. Could I do it well
enough to fool people and be with Beau forever?
Love, if it's strong enough, I thought, gives you the power to do things beyond your imagination. Maybe
this was true for us now.
I took a deep breath and then returned to the
study and told Paul what had happened and what Beau
had proposed. He sat there with amazing calm and
listened as I gushed the story and the fantastic
proposal. Then he got up and went to the window. He
stood there for the longest time.
"You'll never stop loving him," he muttered
bitterly. "I was a fool to think otherwise. If I only had
listened to my mother. . ." He sighed deeply and
turned.
"I can't help the way I feel about him, Paul." He nodded and looked very thoughtful for a
moment. "Maybe you have to live with him to see
what sort of a man he really is. Maybe then you'll
understand the difference between him and me." "Paul, I love you for what you've done for Pearl
and me and your devotion to me, but we've been
living only half a marriage. Besides, we once agreed
that if either of us could have someone else, someone
we loved and could have a full relationship with, the
other would not prevent it."
He nodded. "What a dreamer I was when I
made those vows with you on your grandmere Catherine's gallery. "Oh well," he continued with a wry smile, "I'll finally be able to do something that will make you truly happy." His eyes suddenly brightened with an additional thought. "Even more than you and Beau would expect." He paused, his face
tight with determination.
"What?" I asked, breathlessly.
"When you call Beau, tell him we'll bring
Gisselle here," he said.
"What?"
"He's right. What difference will anything make
to her now? You and I will go to the ranch after lunch
tomorrow. I have some important business to conduct.
We'll pretend we're going for a short holiday and then
I will return with Gisselle and give out the story that it
is you who have suffered the encephalitis. I'll fix a
comfortable place for her upstairs and we'll have
nurses around the clock. Since she has lapses of
memory and is confused and semiconscious most of
the time, it won't be difficult."
"You would do that for me?" I asked,
incredulous. He smiled. "I love you that much, Ruby.
Maybe now you'll really understand."
"But I can't do this to you, Paul. It would be too
hard and unfair."
"It's nothing. In this big house, I wouldn't even
notice the arrangements," he said.
"I don't mean only that. You have a life
to live,
too," I insisted.
"And I will. In my own way. Go on, call Beau." He had such a strange look in his eyes. I sensed
that he believed this would somehow bring me back to
him someday. Whatever his reasons, it certainly made
our switch of identities far more possible.
I turned to call Beau and then stopped, realizing
the biggest problem of all.
"We can't do this, Paul. It's impossible." "Why?"
"Pearl!" I said. "If I'm Gisselle, what happens to
her?"
Paul thought a moment and then nodded. "With
you supposedly seriously ill and with our nanny gone
to care for her own family, I will take her to live with
her aunt and uncle until the ordeal at Cypress Woods
ends. For the time being, it will serve as a good cover
story."
I was overwhelmed with his quick thinking.
"Oh, Paul, I don't deserve this kindness and sacrifice.
I really don't," I cried.
He smiled coolly. "You'll come visit your sick sister from time to time, won't you?" he asked, and I understood that in this strange way, he hoped to keep
me tied to him.
"Of course, although Gisselle wouldn't care." "Be careful," he warned with another grin.
"Don't be too nice or people will say,. . what's come
over her? She's not herself these days."
"Yes," I said, realizing how great the challenge
ahead of me was. I had very little confidence in
myself. For now, I would have to be happy with only
desire, the desire to be with Beau as his wife forever.
Maybe that was enough. For Pearl's sake and mine, I
prayed it was.
Book Two
.
11
Nothing Ventured
.
Beau was very excited and happy about Paul's
proposal, but I was troubled by Paul's willingness to be part of this. What was he thinking? What was he hoping would happen as a result? I tossed and turned all night, haunted by the things that could go wrong and expose our deception. Once that happened, people would want to know more, and then the truth about Paul and me with all the sins of the past would be revealed. Not only would Pearl and I be disgraced, but the Tates would be devasated. The risks were enormous. I was sure Paul understood them as well as I did, but he was determined to remain tied to me, even in this bizarre fashion.
When I awoke in the morning, I thought it had all been a dream until Paul knocked on my door and poked his head in to tell me we would leave for the Dumas country home a little after two. He estimated the ride to the ranch would take us close to three hours. A ripple of apprehension shot down my spine. I rose and started to make preparations. My body actually trembled as I moved about, thinking about what I would and wouldn't take.
Since my taste in clothing and Gisselle's was different, I realized I had to leave most of my things behind, but I decided to take the jewelry and the mementoes that were most precious to me. I packed as many of Pearl's things as I could without drawing any suspicions. After all, we were supposed to be going away for only a few days.
As I folded Pearl's things into her small suitcase, I thought how strange it was going to be for me to pretend I was only her aunt and not her mother. Fortunately, Pearl was still young enough so that when she called me Mommy, people would only assume she was confused. I would say that it was easier to let her do so for now. What I dreaded was later when she was old enough to understand it all, because then I would have to tell her the truth as to why her father and I had done this and why I took my sister's name. I couldn't help worrying about how it might change the way she thought of us.
I spent the morning wandering about Cypress Woods with Pearl, drinking it all in as though I would never see any of it again. I knew whenever I did return, it would look different to me since I had to think of it no longer as my home, but as my sister's home, a place to visit and a place I supposedly disliked. I would have to behave as though the bayou were as foreign as China to me, for that was the way Gisselle reacted to it.
I thought that would be the hardest thing to do: pretend to hate the bayou. No matter how I practiced, I was sure I couldn't be very convincing about that. Surely my heart would not permit me to mock and complain about the world in which I had grown and the world I had loved all my life.
While Pearl was taking her nap, I went up to my studio to store the things I wanted to protect from time and inattention. As my sister, Gisselle, I would have to do any drawing and painting secretly. Once the news got out that Ruby was an invalid,
semiconscious and mentally impaired, the new paintings could no longer be delivered to the art gallery, but I took solace in the fact that I wasn't doing them so much for the fame and money as I was for my own inner satisfaction.
Paul returned home for lunch, which was hard for both of us. Neither of us came right out and said it, but we knew this was the last meal we would sit down to as man and wife. It was important that we didn't act too differently in front of our servants. Nevertheless, every other moment it seemed we were both gazing across the table at each other as if we had just met and neither knew how to begin a sentence. Tension made us overly polite toward each other. Twice we started simultaneously.
"Go on," he said again.
"No, you go on this time," I insisted.
"I wanted to assure you I would see that the
studio is kept clean. Maybe you and Beau will vacation here and you can slip up there and do some work, if you like. I'll just say the work was completed before Ruby became so sick."
I nodded, although I didn't think that would ever happen. Despite the fact that it was Gisselle who had contracted St Louis encephalitis and not me, it made me feel strange to talk about myself as the one who was seriously ill. I quickly envisioned everyone's initial reactions, reactions I wouldn't see because I would be already gone. I expected Paul's sisters would be very upset. His mother would probably be overjoyed, but I did think his father would be sad, for we had gotten along quite well despite Gladys Tate's feelings toward me. The servants would take it hard. I was sure there would be tears.
As soon as the news was spread throughout the bayou, all the people who knew me would feel terrible. Many of Grandmere Catherine's friends would go to church and light a candle for me. As I imagined these scenes, one after the other, I felt a sense of guilt for causing all this sorrow based on a grand deception and I began to wilt in my seat.
"Are you all right?" Paul asked after our dishes were cleared away.
"Yes," I said, but the tears burned under my eyelids and I felt one hot flush after another. Suddenly the room was like an oven. "I'll be right back," I cried, and got up abruptly.
"Ruby!"
I ran out of the dining room and into a bathroom to throw cold water on my cheeks and forehead. When I gazed at myself in the mirror, I saw how the blood had drained from my face, leaving me looking white as fresh milk.
"You're going to be punished for doing this," I warned my reflection. "Maybe someday you will become seriously ill, too."
My mind was in turmoil. Should I put a stop to it before it was too late?
There was a gentle knock on the door.
"Ruby. Beau's on the phone," Paul said. "Are you all right?"
"Yes. I'll be right there, Paul. Thank you."
I dabbed my face with more cold water, quickly wiped it dry, and then went into the office for privacy. "Hello."
"Paul said you weren't doing so well. Are you all right?"
"You still want to go through with it, don't you?" he asked, his voice cracking with fear of disappointment. I took a deep breath. "Everything's set," he added before I could reply. "I have the station wagon prepared like an ambulance so we can drive her back to Cypress Woods, pretending it's you. I'll follow in Paul's car and help get her into
the house. He's still willing to go through with it all, isn't he?"
"Yes, but . . Beau. . . what if I can't do this?"
"You can. You must. Ruby, I love you and you love me and we have a daughter to bring up together. It's what was meant to be. We have a chance to defeat Fate. Let's not throw it away. I promise. I'll be at your side constantly. I'll make sure it works."
Strengthened by his words, I felt myself regain composure. The blood returned to my face and my heart stopped pounding.
"All right, Beau. We'll be there."
"Good. I love you," he said, and hung up. I heard another click and realized Paul had been listening in on our conversation, but I wasn't going to embarrass him by letting him know I knew. He left to complete some last-minute errands and I fetched Pearl after her nap and fed her lunch. Afterward, I took her up to my room to wait. My small suitcase and my pocketbook looked pathetic beside the vanity table. I was taking so little with me, but when I had first returned to the bayou, I had brought even less, I reminded myself.
I became very fidgety. The minutes seemed more like hours. When I gazed out the window, I saw clouds moving in from the southwest. They were growing thicker and longer. The wind became stronger and I realized a storm was brewing. A bad omen, I thought. I trembled and embraced myself. Was Nature, the bayou, conspiring to keep me from doing this? I knew Grandmere Catherine might say something just like that if she were at my side now. Lightning flashed and there was a roar of thunder that seemed to shake the house.
Just a little after two o'clock, Paul came to my door and peered in. "Ready?"
I looked around one final time and nodded. My knees were knocking together and my abdomen felt like a hollowed-out cave, but I lifted Pearl into my arms and leaned over to get my bag.
"I'll get it," he said, and picked it up before I could. He gazed into my eyes, searching for my true inner feelings, but I looked away quickly.
"You're going to miss it here, Ruby," he said, piercing me with his diamond-hard glare. "No matter how much you tell yourself you won't, you will. The bayou is as much a part of you as it is a part of me. That's why you returned to it when you were in trouble," he said.
"It's not like I won't ever return, Paul."
"Once we make the switch and we go through the performances, it will be impossible for you to return as Ruby, though," he reminded me sharply.
"I know," I said.
"You must really love him to do all this to be with him," he said, his voice dripping with envy. When I didn't reply, he sighed and gazed out the windows at the canals for a moment. Poor Paul, I thought. A part of him wanted to vent rage and anger at both Beau and me, but that part of him that loved me prevented it and left him filled with frustration.
All That Glitters Page 19
