“I’m going to go get some sleep,” I tell him.
“Good. I’ll see you in the morning,” Josh says, but he doesn’t move from where he’s standing in the kitchen.
I go upstairs to my room and lay on my bed, processing what just happened and the likely danger we’ll be in tomorrow. I contemplate why I ever took this job in the first place. I’m thinking about my family when I hear a knock on the door.
“Who is it?” I call from the bed.
“Hawthorne,” the voice on the other side says, sounding morose.
I jump up from the bed and go to the door, opening it slowly. Standing there is Hawthorne, looking tired and deflated, not at all the ego-crazy werewolf that I’m used to seeing.
“May I come in?” he asks.
“Of course. This is your house, silly,” I reply
Hawes comes in and collapses on the bed. I sit next to him, stroking his hair and waiting for whatever it is he wants to tell me.
Chapter 8
Hawes
I’m not sure what to say, how to explain things to her. It’s not that I’m selfish, it’s just that I’m tired of people using me for their own means and goals and acting like I’m the selfish, irresponsible one for having an opinion on it.
Especially with Rose at stake. How can I argue that them going to that fight would be too dangerous if everyone just sees me as some asshole who just wants to use her as an excuse to save my own neck? I admit I’ve been selfish lately. While I was away on my own. But there was a time when I wasn’t selfish at all and it damn near broke me.
“I’m sorry,” I tell Rose.
“About what?” she asks, sounding miffed.
“About how I acted earlier. Throwing a tantrum. You guys are just trying to do your jobs and protect the shifter race. Or whatever it is you guys do,” I say, with a wave of my hand.
Rose laughs, a soft sound that raises my spirits. Even the slightest sign of happiness from her seems to have this incredible healing power for me.
“You know, not all of us are like Josh,” Rose says, leaning back on the pillow. “For some of us, it’s just a job.”
“Really, you’re not all as zealous as captain save-the-universe?” I reply.
“No, not really. He takes the job really seriously. I probably wouldn’t have even had it if not for my father,” she tells me.
“So, you didn’t always want to be a part of saving the shifter race from extinction?” I joke.
“Honestly, I’m not really sure what I wanted to do with my life. My dad was always very involved with shifter culture and politics. He’s one of those rare people that sees everything with the big picture. The only problem is that sometimes the picture was so big that it was hard to find me in it.”
“Really? Someone as amazing as you?” I want to hear more about Rose’s past. It distracts me from my own.
“Yeah, he held a lot of positions over the years. Some diplomatic, some in leadership, some in enforcement. He was always telling us that if we didn’t watch out for our own, no one else would.”
“What he didn’t realize was that in looking out for our own, he actually failed to look out for his own,” I say.
Rose flushes and looks away. “Don’t get me wrong. He’s a great father. I mean he really did care for me. I just think that when my mother died, he threw himself into work to cope with it. And the more he was at work, the less I saw of him,” she says, beginning to sound a little sadder.
“Well, it’s made you into who you are now, and that’s pretty incredible, so there’s something to be said for that,” I say, hoping to cheer her up.
She smiles, showing those perfect teeth of hers for a second. She looks back at me, eyes beautiful and blue and earnest and asks, “So, tell me about your family. I know very little about them.”
I shrug. “Not much to say. My older brother, Rafe, was destined to be alpha from the start, and that’s that.”
She eyes me suspiciously, raising an eyebrow and looking at me knowingly.
Drat. Caught.
“I’m not sure what to say. It’s kind of a confusing story for even me. There are three of us. Rafe, the oldest. And then Lindon and I after him. Rafe was the only child of the two pack alphas. Lindon and I are only half. So Rafe was filling the boots of alpha male since he was very young, which more or less left me without a purpose.”
Rose just sits and listens, not saying anything. Just watching me with her big, beautiful blue eyes.
“I guess everything came to a boiling point when the only alpha female in our pack, Aspen, came back a while ago, and was given the choice between the three of us.”
“Yeah, I’ve heard of her, but I know nothing about her,” Rose interjects.
“Yeah. We had an ‘alpha games’, of sorts. She wasn’t sure who she wanted as a mate, so we were all supposed to make ourselves available. Not that that was hard. We all really wanted Aspen badly, not just because she was the only available alpha female, but also because she was wonderful. And because we’d all been friends since we were pups.”
“Interesting. So you knew her growing up?” she asks.
“Yeah. She was an orphan that we brought in and raised with the pack.”
“Weird. I’ve never heard of something like that before. But I guess it’s more common with packs in the wild, given the limited resources and the isolation,” she says.
I smile to myself. Yeah, I guess it is kind of odd, but we sure weren’t thinking that at the time. “Now that you mention it, I can see where you’re coming from on that. But we really were all in love with Aspen, in some way or the other.”
Rose just nods to me, and waits. I appreciate that she’s not trying to overanalyze things right now.
I continue. “The problem was, we all knew who she was going to choose in the end. Even if we allowed ourselves to hope, we knew. Aspen and Rafe had always just…been like that. So anyway, Aspen chose Rafe, they ran off into the sunset together, and now they’re living happily ever after as pack alphas.”
“Which leaves you here, to wallow in squalor with us lesser beings?” she says, poking me in the side.
“Hey stop that, I’m baring my soul to you right now!” I say, playfully swatting her poking fingers away.
She continues for a few seconds more, trying to get past my defenses, then she stops. She just sits there and smiles at me, then cocks her head to the side and says, “So what have you been up to since then? Earning your meager living through your fists?”
“Fists and feet. When I’m in the ring, I feel powerful, in control. For so long I had no control over my destiny and that was…unbearable.” I sigh. “To be honest, I’m still looking for that thing I love. Looking for the reason to get up each day.”
“So the whole Aspen thing wrecked you pretty hard, didn’t it?” she asks.
“Yeah, I guess so. More than I have wanted to admit, at least.”
Rose scoots closer to me on the bed, sitting next to me, and I can feel her warmth on my side. She puts her hand on my leg, imitating the same moves I used on her when we first arrived earlier today. I give her a wry smile, and she smiles back.
“So what next?” she asks.
“To be honest, I don’t know. Frankly, I just want to get us both, mainly you, through tomorrow night alive.”
“So, not sold on the whole mission thing?” she questions.
“Yes and no. I mean, I get what we’re doing and why we’re doing it. I just don’t get why it has to put you in danger.”
“I signed up for it. I may not like it all the time, but I know what I got myself into,” she says with a shrug.
“I know. I’m just worried. I don’t think Josh’s plan is as concrete as he wants to make it sound.”
“It never is. But whatever he lacks in planning, he makes up for in execution,” she says nonchalantly.
“What is it about you two, anyway? I got an odd vibe from you two when Josh first arrived.”
“We have a lot of hist
ory, true. He’s both my partner and my superior at the same time. But aside from that, he insists that we’re somehow ‘the perfect mates’ for each other,” she says.
I growl at the thought of Josh trying anything with her. Rose senses this and placates me.
“Honestly, there’s nothing there. I think part of me would have thought it easiest if there was, but he’s all wrong for me.”
“So, tell me what Mr. Right would look like?” I say, putting my hand on her leg now and rubbing it gently.
“I don’t know. I guess it depends.” She bites her lip and looks me up and down.
“Well, he has to be hot, obviously,” I say, starting to make a list with my hand.
“Obviously,” she says, smiling.
“Well, he should probably be rich too. Financial stability and all that.”
“I guess so, but not necessary.”
“How about funny? You certainly deserve someone that makes you laugh.” A third finger goes up to join my other two.
“Naturally,” she says, stifling a laugh.
“And protective. Someone who looks out for you.” The list continues to grow. A fourth finger up.
“I would like that,” she says.
“And is Mr. Right charming?”
“Of course. He has to be charming,” she says.
All five fingers are out now.
“Oh no, looks like our list is full,” Rose says.
“Well, there’s one more thing.” I pop my leg over Rose and straddle her on the bed, looking down into her eyes, that are now looking up into mine, shocked and aroused. “You better make sure Mr. Right can do this.”
“Yes, of course,” Rose says, her breathing quickening, the air in the room feeling hotter and heavier.
I cup Rose’s face with my hand and move closer to her, centimeters away from kissing her. I can feel her breath on my lips. I’m so close I can almost taste her. “Does this work?”
“I don’t know. You better keep going so I can make sure,” Rose replies between breaths, each one holding greater anticipation than the one before it. Being this close, her scent is driving me crazy right now. Not just the smell of an alpha female, but the smell of Rose. My Rose. Her smell is like something right between winter and spring, as snow melts and gives way to life and to growth, bringing with it a cascade of wonderful new things coming into the world.
I move closer, our lips agonizingly close now, almost brushing. It’s torturing me to be this close and not all over her yet, but a masochistic part of me wants to see who breaks first.
“Are you just gonna sit there looking pretty, or are you gonna kiss me already?” she murmurs in a sultry tone.
I can’t help myself. I kiss her, my lips sinking into hers, my hips resting over hers. It’s so hot, so sensual. I kiss her again and again, from every direction and every angle. Over and over, our lips locking, the warmth and the wetness building, the heat in the air rising. I hear a sigh escape Rose’s lips, and I move to her neck, desperate to hear the sound again. I caress her neck with my lips, following her where my body tells me to go, bringing her to life in my arms. She wraps her arms around me and digs her hips into mine as I continue kissing, pushing the arousal I’m feeling further and further.
“Oh, gosh, Hawes, don’t stop.”
I move my way up to her ear, running my tongue along the outer rim and then placing a kiss at the base of her ear, which is answered by a soft gasp from Rose.
While I’m doing that, my hands find their way to her soft breasts. Even with the bra on, they’re large and soft in my hands. I squeeze them gently in tandem with my kissing, hoping to please her more every second.
The urge to claim her is incredibly strong, her pheromones have gotten stronger since this morning, and the desire is becoming almost uncontrollable. But I know it’s not just the mating urge, I also want Rose. I want her to be mine. Always.
I continue gently kneading her breasts, then run my hands down her sides to her hips, as I come back to kiss her on the mouth. She opens her mouth freely and I go inside of her with my tongue, the warmth and the wetness of our mouths and our tongues enmeshing, bringing the moment to a fever pitch.
I want Rose right now, with every part of me, but what about tomorrow? What happens when we go to the fight? Are we ready for this?
People have always derided me for dodging responsibility. I don’t want to be that person now. Rose is too precious to me to take this lightly. And I don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow. Or, even if things go well, what will happen after that.
I pull away from Rose’s mouth and Rose opens her eyes, gently gasping for air, overwhelmed by the intensity of our kissing.
“I think we should probably head to bed, Rose,” I say, trying to be the logical one for once in my life.
“Aw, I miss Mr. Right,” she says, sounding disappointed, but not devastated.
“I really think we should get a head start on tomorrow.” That, and I can’t bear the thought of making an irreversible decision without knowing what tomorrow will bring.
“Well, you know where to find me,” Rose says, as I gently move off of her, and off the bed.
Unable to resist her full, beautiful red lips, and those stunning blue eyes, I lean over and give her one last kiss, then tell her goodnight and head toward the door.
“Hawes,” Rose calls out from her place on the bed behind me, “It’s going to be okay.”
“Yes, it will,” I reply, looking over my shoulder at the beautiful, amazing woman lying on the bed. It will be okay, because no matter what happens to me, I’m not going to let any harm come to her. I’d give my life for her.
She smiles, mistaking my silent resolve for calm, and pulls her sheets up, preparing for sleep. She blows me one more kiss, which I catch with one hand. I open the door, lock it, then close it behind me as I leave.
For a moment, I just stand there with my back to the door, unwilling to leave her side.
What the hell am I going to do?
Chapter 9
Rose
I wake the next morning to the sound of birds outside, chirping animatedly about something. The events from yesterday flood into my mind. Especially the time Hawes and I spent together in the forest.
The thought excites me, remembering his hands and his lips and his sexy body, and that cocky smile. Then I remember the conversation with Josh, the mission, what we’re supposed to do today.
I get up and get dressed in some of the fresh clothes from the bag Josh brought, putting on a pair of slacks and a blazer with a white blouse.
I go downstairs and find the house oddly empty. No sounds coming from the kitchen, nobody around in the living room. Breaking through the quiet though, I can hear music from somewhere in the house, somewhere deep in the house. I follow the sound, leading me down a hallway on the first floor, bringing me to a door. I open it and find a flight of stairs leading down into what looks like a basement.
I follow them down. The music is louder now. It’s some generic punk rock I think I’ve heard before but don’t recognize. I reach the bottom and find a full size gym, decked out with an array of weight sets, benches, machines, treadmills, punching bags and other training devices. At one of the punching bags, oddly shaped to look like a clay colored human without arms and wearing a grimacing face, is Hawes.
He looks to be practicing for tonight, a flurry of motion as he kicks, punches, feints and lunges in and out of range of the bag.
“Hey there, tiger,” I say. Hawes is sexy when he’s working out, and I wish I could stand there and stare at him a little longer. But I’d like to talk with him while we still have time.
Hawes hears me and stops, putting his hands on the dummy to stop its rocking back and forth. He walks over to a boombox that looks it came out of the 70’s and turns off his music. He picks up a shirt, about to put it on, when I interrupt him.
“No need,” I say. I prefer Hawes shirtless, so I can see his toned muscles and tanned body.
&
nbsp; Hawes smiles at me, but there’s tension behind his smile. A chill goes over me as I wonder what’s wrong. But Hawes quickly masks it, sitting down on a bench and patting the spot next to him, beckoning me to sit down. I do so, sliding in beside him, aware of his warmth and the heat he’s emitting from an intense workout. I’m also aware of his scent, his unique scent filling the gym, even more intense right next to him. Spicy, masculine, attractive.
“So, you ready for tonight?” I ask.
“As ready as I can be, considering the mob is probably trying to prepare some sort of trap. But to be honest, I’m not worried about me. No matter what the scenario, a human against a shifter is always stacked, period.”
“Yeah, I noticed last time.” I smile, remembering his fight. It feels so long ago, even if it wasn’t.
Hawes looks at me and flexes his bicep, smirking ridiculously, which makes me laugh. Hawes always knows how to make me laugh.
“Yeah, about that,” I say. “You seem to be unnaturally strong, even for a shifter. I mean, I know shifters have super-human strength most of the time, but yours exceeds even that.”
“Just hard work and sweat, that’s all it is,” Hawes says, though he sounds like he’s dodging.
“Ha ha. But no, seriously. I don’t think Josh could crush a table with his bare hands like that. At least not so easily.”
Hawes puffs his cheeks, blowing out air through them, and folds his arms. There are a few moments of silence while Hawes seems to be collecting his thoughts.
“It’s not something I’ve told anybody, yet,” Hawes says. “Have you heard of a thing called alpha powers?”
I nod. I have before, though there’s a lot of mystery surrounding the subject. Not a lot is known, and most packs tend to keep it a closely guarded secret amongst family members. My father rarely spoke of it, I’m not sure why. Probably because he cared more about what was tangible and able to be catalogued, not things shrouded in mystery and speculation.
Ultimate Alpha Boxed Set: A BBW and Wolf Shifter collection Page 30
