“Come on in,” I greet, standing to the side.
He has a six-pack in one hand and a pink bakery box in the other. He walks right into my tiny kitchen and sets the box down, opening the fridge and placing his beer inside. Before he closes it, he takes one bottle out of the cardboard holder.
Twisting off the cap, he takes a pull, then he looks at me. “I didn’t know what kind of dessert you liked. I figured most bitches liked chocolate,” he shrugs.
I blink, surprised by his casual use of the word bitches. Not that I really care, but I am surprised since he’s never said anything like that to me before. “I do, like chocolate,” I smile.
He takes another pull from his beer, before tipping his chin to the box. I shuffle my feet toward him and reach for the pink package. Slowly, I untie the white string and lift the lid. There are brownies, cookies, and cupcakes filling the box. All chocolate.
“Oh, Baby. This looks delicious,” I smile.
He grins. Reaching for a cookie. I watch as he takes it out and then shoves half of it in his mouth. “You want to watch a movie or something?” he asks, walking out of my kitchen.
“Sure. I don’t really have any though, we’ll have to see what’s on television,” I shrug, reaching for the chocolate cupcake with swirls of chocolate icing, and what looks like even chocolate sprinkles on top.
“Netflix?” he calls out.
I watch as he sinks down onto my small sofa. He takes up almost the entire thing, especially when he spreads his thighs wide.
Clearing my throat, I shake my head. “No Netflix, I’m not home enough to justify spending money on it,” I admit as I make my way closer to him.
I glance at the chair that’s to the side, then at the small area of the sofa that’s available. My booty won’t fit there, so I sit down on the edge of the chair.
Baby seems unbothered by where I’ve chosen to sit down as he points my remote control at my television and starts to flip through the channels.
“Beautiful, your TV is shit,” he announces. The cupcake is suspended halfway in my mouth and I glance over at him. “I’m sorry, but it is. Where’d you get this?” he asks.
I take the bite of chocolate goodness, chewing a few times before I swallow. “Crooner had it in his room, he said he needed to upgrade, so he gave it to me,” I admit.
Baby snorts. “This thing is ancient. I’ll go out tomorrow, get you something decent, and Netflix.”
I shake my head. “No, no. I can’t let you do that,” I say almost pleadingly.
“Hayden, it’s really for me. I can’t come over and hang out with you and look at this shitty TV. It’s really fucking bad. I know you aren’t ready for more than that, so the only option is Netflix and a new TV.”
Pressing my lips together, I roll them around. He’s right, I don’t want to do more than watch television and eat cupcakes with him. I thought that maybe by having him here alone in my house I would feel differently, but so far, I don’t.
“C’mon over here, beautiful,” he calls.
His voice is deep, a little husky, and I gulp down another bite of the cake as I stand. Slowly I make my way toward him, sinking down into the small open square that he isn’t covering, and let out a deep breath. Baby slides his arm around my shoulder and tugs me into his side. Stiffly, I go along with him, stupidly wishing that it were Crooner’s arm around me, and his body I was plastered up against.
The television is low, and I glance up to see that it’s sports. I never pegged Baby for being the athletic type, but he’s got a dick, so I’m sure it’s just part of him. His fingers gently rub circles on my shoulder and it relaxes me enough to sink against him a little more.
“How was work today?” he asks.
I lift my chin, but he’s not looking down at me, he’s staring straight forward at the TV. I watch as he takes a pull from his beer before I answer. “It was good, long,” I say.
“This is going to be good between us, Hayden. Just wait and see,” he murmurs.
I gulp, nodding my head once. I don’t know if there is going to be anything between us, let alone if it’s going to be good, but I don’t tell him that. Laying my head on his chest, I simply breathe.
I don’t know what will happen, if anything will happen, but I’m going to let this thing slowly unfold. I’m not going to push him away, not until I know for sure how I feel. I’m still hung up on Crooner, and until that goes away, I won’t know anything for sure.
My eyelids drop closed and I enjoy Baby’s fingers on my shoulder. It’s calming and soothing. My stomach is full of chocolate cake, and tomorrow is Saturday. Tomorrow I get to spend the entire day with Easton and begin my two favorite days of the week. Saturday and Sunday, my days with my boy.
“Mama,” a voice whispers in my ear.
My entire body jolts straight up and I look around a bit confused. Easton is standing in front of me, and then my eyes shift to the side and I see Baby with his head tipped back and his mouth open in sleep. Dammit, we fell asleep on the couch.
“Morning, baby boy,” I coo, leaning down to scoop up Easton.
Baby snorts next to me, his head lifting. “Huh?”
“We fell asleep,” I giggle as Easton’s arms wrap around my neck and he snuggles in close.
Baby’s eyes look at Easton, and then back up at me and he smiles. “Sorry, beautiful. How about we go out for breakfast though? We’re all awake,” he offers.
I bite my bottom lip and look at Easton, then Baby.
“Cancakes, Mama,” Easton cries.
My stomach drops at the suggestion. I know they’re Easton’s favorite, but the last time I made them, it was for Crooner. “Let’s get the boy some pancakes,” Baby announces.
I nod. I want Easton to have his desires, but I can’t make them for Baby, not yet at least. “Okay, let me take a quick shower.”
“I got him, we’ll watch cartoons,” Baby shrugs.
Hurrying to my bedroom, I shower as quickly as I can, not wanting to leave Easton and Baby alone for long. They don’t really know one another well, and not everybody has patience when it comes to toddlers. When I’m dressed in a pair of jeans and a tank top, I slip my feet into some flip-flops, throw my hair in a messy bun and rush out of the room to find both of them sitting on the couch next to one another.
Easton is staring at the television and I look over to see that Mickey Mouse is playing. “Thanks, Baby. I’ll just get him ready and then we can go.”
“Can I use your bathroom, so I don’t smell like last night’s beer?” he winks.
I nod as I pick Easton up. I feel so awkward and we haven’t even done anything. My face heats with the thought, if I feel this way now, what will I feel like if we actually do something? I shake my head.
It only takes me a few minutes to get Easton ready for the day. Once I’m finished slipping his shoe on and tying it tight, we walk out of his room and into the living room.
Baby is already standing there, looking down at his phone. He lifts his eyes and smiles when he sees us. “Shit,” he hisses, frowning. “You guys can’t go on my bike.”
“We can walk. We’re used to it,” I shrug.
Baby continues to frown but doesn’t move. “Is that how you guys do everything? Grocery store, everything?” he asks.
I bite the corner of my bottom lip, my eyes dropping to my feet and I shift from side to side before I lift my gaze back up to his. “Yeah. I don’t have a car or a driver’s license,” I shrug.
“Shit,” he grunts. “How has nobody made this shit a priority? You’re a single mother, no way in fuck should you be without a ride. What did you do during the winter?” he barks.
I jump slightly at his hard tone, my eyes wide and my mouth dropped open slightly. “Don’t tell me you walked to Gracie’s with Easton in tow, in the middle of winter? Crooner didn’t take care of you two?”
Pressing my lips together, I shake my head. Crooner had taken care of us, for a few months, then when my threat was gone, and he w
as recovering, that was it. I’ve done what I needed to do to take care of me and Easton, and I haven’t asked anybody for help.
Baby is right, I’m a single mother, so I’ve just done whatever needs to be done. That includes walking to Gracie’s when the temperature is in the negatives. Life is hard sometimes, but I’d rather be living in this harsh reality than the one I was in before that group of nomads saved me.
“It wasn’t Crooner’s responsibility to take care of us, Baby. We were never together,” I state.
The words leave a bad taste in my mouth. They’re true, but it doesn’t make me hate them any less. That’s all I’ve wanted since the moment I laid eyes on him, to have him as my own. Now, it seems like it’s never going to be a possibility and it’s completely disappointing.
Even if Baby is standing right here, handsome and nice, and more importantly open to more with me, it doesn’t change the fact that I still want Crooner.
“C’mon, beautiful. Let’s get you two fed, then we’ll figure out a car situation,” he offers.
Together we walk out of the trailer. Baby takes my hand in his and my other hand is occupied by Easton. It’s strange, and yet, not uncomfortable to walk hand-in-hand with him. I let out a breath and try to relax, trying to enjoy the moment between us. This is something new, and I should be excited.
CROONER
The cabin is small and shitty, but for the price, I shouldn’t be surprised. It’s not like we need anything nice. It’s just the three of us, and this is a crash pad between scoping out the compound. We stopped at a little supermarket at the edge of town and we were on high alert the entire time.
We all decided to stash our cuts in the van, not wishing to draw more attention than need be. The Aryan group will know who we are, and we need to stay incognito for as long as possible. I pull out my phone and scroll through my contacts. Tomorrow we’re going to check shit out, but tonight we’re laying low.
I press send, not sure why I’m calling her but feeling the need to hear her voice. It’s not too late, so I know she’ll be awake, plus it’s Saturday night and I also know she doesn’t have to work tomorrow.
“Hello?” she breathes.
“I didn’t wake you, did I?”
There’s a pause for a moment, and I pull the phone away to look at it, thinking she hung up on me before she starts talking. “No, my phone was in my room, and I was finishing cleaning up the kitchen from dinner and stuff,” she murmurs.
“You doing okay?” I ask.
Lifting my hand, I run it through my hair and tug on the back before I wrap my fingers around my neck. I don’t know what I’m doing, but I can’t stop thinking about her. The whole reason I left on this trip was to put distance between us, but I’ve thought about her more in the past two days than I ever have.
Maybe it’s the finality of how we left things, maybe it’s because no matter what I say, I still want her. “I’m okay,” she whispers, breaking up my thoughts. “I don’t even want to admit that I miss you,” she rasps.
“Fuck, babe,” I sigh. “Miss the fuck outta you.”
“I can’t do this with you,” she hiccups.
I know she’s got tears in her eyes and she probably hates me right about now. I can’t be without her though and thinking about Baby touching her, it’s got me all kinds of pissed off. “Don’t do anything with anyone, until I get back, Hayden.”
“No, no. You don’t get to do this to me anymore, Ward,” she snaps. “I’m done. I’m not sitting around here while you yank me around anymore. I told you no more, and I mean it,” she says. Her words are strong, but I can hear the question in her voice.
Clearing my throat, I try not to sound like a pissed off bear when I speak. “Okay, babe. You’re right. I just, don’t make any permanent decisions until I get home, yeah?”
“Permanent?” she asks.
I chuckle, thinking about how she’s probably pressing her lips together. “Don’t take his ink, babe.”
She lets out what sounds like a choking laugh. “We haven’t even kissed, Ward.”
I don’t laugh at her words, instead, I growl. “Don’t do that either.”
“Goodnight, Ward,” her soft voice sings.
She doesn’t say that she won’t kiss him though. I grunt, not saying anything else. The call ends and I’m staring at my blank phone. I should have said more to her, I should have done more before I left. Instead, I practically pushed her toward Baby and now I’m regretting it completely. Fuck.
CHAPTER EIGHT
HAYDEN
Baby knocks on my door. It’s ten in the morning, the exact time he said he’d be here to walk Easton and me to Gracie’s. I open the door, Easton’s bag in one hand, and his hand in the other. Baby didn’t come by yesterday, and I’m glad. I needed the day to just be with Easton, and to think. Especially after Crooner’s phone call late Saturday night.
He said what I wanted to hear, but I can’t help but wonder if it’s too late. Sure, his words made my belly dip and my heart race, but what if he doesn’t back them up? What if I throw this chance with Baby away, and Crooner does what he’s done for the past year? Pretends he’s no good for me and pushes me away. I can’t keep going through the same shit over and over with him, it’s exhausting.
“Hey,” I smile up at Baby.
He frowns, but then shakes his head before leaning down to brush his lips across my cheek. “You working all day today?” he asks as we head toward Gracie’s.
“I am, but I have a lunch break at one,” I shrug.
Baby wraps his hand around the back of my neck and squeezes. “Meet you at your trailer?”
A thrill shimmies up my spine at his question. A thrill I didn’t think that I could have for him. It’s excitement and I can’t stop myself from smiling. “Yeah,” I breathe.
“Good.”
It doesn’t take us long to drop off Easton and then make our way back to the bar. Baby’s lips graze my temple before he says goodbye, and then he’s gone, leaving me at the back door of the bar.
Pressing my lips together, I dig out my key and head inside. I shouldn’t feel disappointed that he didn’t check the place out to make sure I was alone like Crooner always did. They aren’t the same person. I can’t expect Baby to do what Crooner would, or vice versa.
The workday passes by quickly enough. The regulars come in and I greet them with a smile and their favorite drinks of choice. Traci left the bar impeccable from the weekend, so it doesn’t leave a whole lot for me to do, which is fine by me, because I seem to be spending every free second I have been thinking about the phone call I had with Crooner.
With my back to the door, I’m cleaning one of the tables in the middle of the bar when I feel strong hands wrap around my hips. I freeze, my breath hitching as my heart begins to race. Fear prickles my entire body and I whimper.
“Beautiful?” Baby asks, releasing me.
I straighten my back and slowly turn around to find him directly behind me. “You scared me,” I admit with a shrug.
His brows knit together, and he drops his chin slightly. It’s obvious he doesn’t quite believe me, but I’m not going into any further explanation. “Ready for lunch?” I ask brightly.
He holds up a bag of takeout and shakes it around slightly. Looking toward the bar, I wave to Ned who covers my lunch shift every day and make my way out the back of the bar. Baby is right behind me, his hand pressing against my back.
When we arrive inside of my trailer, I walk straight toward the kitchen. Baby drops the bag of food on the counter, but I don’t hear the paper crinkling. I turn around and he’s just standing with his ass pressed against the countertop.
“Baby?”
His arm reaches out and his hand wraps around my wrist, tugging me against his chest in one swift move. I place my hands on his chest for stability and tip my head back to look up into his eyes. Without a word, he lowers his face and his lips touch mine. My eyes widen, and I make a noise in the back of my throat in surprise.
Baby’s tongue snakes out and gently caresses the seam of my lips. My eyes slide closed as my mouth opens slightly. Baby’s tongue slips inside of my mouth and sweeps through me, tasting me. Excitement shimmies up my spine, but desire doesn’t.
Deciding to help things along, my tongue matches his own strokes and I lift my arms, sliding them around his neck and pressing my chest against his. Still, I feel nothing. One of Baby’s hands slides down to my ass and he grabs a handful, squeezing. His other hand slips up the back of my shirt, grazing along my skin.
His fingers quickly unfasten my bra and I yelp, taking a step back. “You’re killin’ me here, Hayden,” he rasps.
“Baby?”
He shakes his head once, pulling me by his hand that’s still grabbing ahold of my ass, against his chest again. He lowers his head, his lips finding my ear before he growls. “We can make each other feel good, beautiful. We don’t have to fuck, but I need something.”
A wave of guilt washes over me. I’m sure that he’s never slept on a couch with a woman and not had sex or taken her and her kid out to breakfast, without anything either, for that matter. We’re here, alone, and it’s my lunch hour. Maybe I should just let him do, whatever.
Pressing my lips together, I give him a nod, but he grunts and pushes me away a little. “Never mind, obviously you’re not into it,” he grumbles.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper.
He shakes his head, letting out a bark of laughter. “Don’t be. It’s cool. Hey, I gotta go, see you around?”
Instantly, I deflate. I watch as he runs his hand along the back of his neck and refuses to meet my gaze. “I’m sorry, Baby. I just, I wasn’t expecting that right now.”
Baby’s eyes lift, and his gaze meets mine. I hold my breath, waiting for him to say something as he searches my face. “You’d lay down right here and let me fuck you, wouldn’t you?” he asks.
I blink, pressing my lips together. I don’t want to answer him, because I’m not sure what my answer would be.
“I mean, if I pushed the issue, you’d let me inside wouldn’t you, Hayden?”
Chased with Strength_Notorious Devils Page 7
