A loud bang woke Mila with a start. Her wolf jumped up, scented, looked, and listened. The door remained shut. Another bang and she spun around. The bottom logs had broken, causing the ones on top to shift and roll. Toward the back of the house, she heard the sound of running water. Hayden was showering.
All seemed well, except she was still in wolf form. Mila kissed her wolf goodbye, promising she wouldn’t wait so long to release her again. As she braved her mind and braced against the pain, Mila began shifting.
First, her fur receded into her skin. Ears and tail were next, being pulled back into her torso to be reformed. Her bones moved under her skin she could feel every drag against her nerves. Fire and pain so intense shot through her torso as expected, though not easy to endure.
To keep her mind off the pain, she counted every break and pop, assessed every strange angle that her genes forced upon her wolf bones until they acquired the right shape and size for a human. By the time she had fully shifted, Mila lay on the rug sweaty and out of breath. While shifting was always torturous, it wasn’t the worst part of being a weak shifter. It was the looks, the comments, the way the strong shifters denigrated her. A wolf’s value came from their strength, not their brains or their heart. Nothing mattered to wolves more than strength and what a shifter could offer through the blood-bond.
Lying naked on the rug, trying to calm her mind and body, Mila jerked unexpectedly as her wolf nipped her from within. Her wolf wasn’t going to sit still for self-pity tonight, and she had a point. They had survived Vance and that alone had been a victory. They’d even attacked him.
Maybe she wasn’t as weak as she thought. Maybe, just maybe, Hayden wouldn’t see her as a weak shifter.
The shower was still running. Mila padded her way to the bathroom, fairly sure he wouldn’t hear her over the water. Despite being in a rustic cabin, the bathroom was fairly modern, with a walk-in shower and a glass partition that extended three fourths the length of the room, just enough to keep the water from splashing the toilet and vanity area. The floor itself was covered in black, two-inch square tiles, while the white tile walls had a band of white, black and clear glass running horizontally around the shower.
A massive shower head poured water down one very deliciously muscled, sexy shifter. Mila frowned at the water disappearing down the drain; it was tinged pink from all the blood.
Hayden’s muscled flexed and moved with utter grace and perfection as he tilted his head back and let the water sluice down his body. With each step closer, she could see how powerful he truly was. Corded muscles layered his arms, shoulders, and neck. But there was something about his chest muscles and how his six-pack drew the eye down further that fascinated her.
As she stepped in front of him, not yet under the stream of water, he opened his eyes. His eyes as pitch black as night had never scared her, but here and now, the way he seemed to look through her to her soul, made her shiver with an intense need only he could fulfill.
“I’m dirty.” She could kick herself. It was the stupidest thing she could possibly say. God help her, she was awful at this.
Hayden quirked a brow. “Just dirty, or is there some naughty inside there too?”
“I meant my skin.”
The claw marks Vance had left on Hayden’s front were mostly gone, as were the bites on his shoulder, arm, and leg. The only scars he would have were the three old ones that decorated his chest and the one that traveled from his left elbow to the back of his hand. Water struck her arms as she lightly traced the three scars that dragged from his collar bone to the end of his rib cage.
Hayden grabbed her hand hard by the wrist. “Don’t,” he said, his voice no longer playful. “I don’t want your pity. I did nothing wrong to earn these.”
“I didn’t say you had,” Mila said as she began to pull away.
Instead of letting go, he yanked her forward until she was tight against his chest, under the water. “I want to understand you better, Hayden.”
Without another word, his mouth came down on hers. He was tender and strong, but there was more to the way he kissed her, the way his hand held the back of her hand, keeping her to him. It was as if he expected her to leave, to abandon him. She feared too many had done just that to her shifter, and she honestly didn’t know if she’d be one of them. She couldn’t hide from him forever. It wasn’t fair to him, but once she showed her true nature, he’d run. The only strong shifters who took a weak shifter were those who had no other choice, those who thought they could control them—and did. Like Vance.
Hayden broke the kiss finally, leaving her wanting more. “I’ll let you finish your shower now.”
“I’m clean, have been since you stood over there watching me.”
“You knew?”
He smirked as he pumped liquid soap into his palm from the shelf above the shower controls. “Arms up, against the wall. And don’t move.”
She tried to hide the shiver going through her as she planted her hands above her just out of the spray’s reach. Hayden ran his soap-filled hands down her arms, front and back. Slippery hands moved over her breasts, kneading them, and drawing out her nipples until they were impossibly hard. He pinched one, eliciting a slight moan that she bit off before he could hear how much she liked what he was doing. The need to resist him was strong right now, and she wasn’t sure why.
One hand remained on a breast while the other dipped lower, zig-zagging down her belly until he reached her mound. “You thought I’d let him take you from me.”
“No,” she said, knowing it wasn’t Vance who’d take her from Hayden, but her own weakness.
He squeezed her nipple hard and held it this time, not releasing her as his other hand found her clit. The pressure there combined with him holding her nipple made her squirm, which in turn sent a shooting sensation from her nipple down to her pussy. Her very empty pussy. He released her nipple at the same time he lightly pinched her clit. The unexpected sensation made her suck in air.
“The more you lie, the harder I’m going to fuck you.”
“That’s confusing. I don’t want to lie—”
“Oh, so you want a hard fuck?”
“Yessss,” she said as his fingers dipped into her entrance. With a gentle tug to her hair, he pulled her head back. His mouth crashed down on hers, his lips were strong and scorching.
“Tell me what you’re hiding, Mila.”
“I’m not hiding anything.”
He spun her around, and slammed her against the wall, cushioning her head with his hand. “You are. I can feel it. I can smell it on you. You’re afraid of something.”
The look on his face was of a shifter who was beyond serious. It was as if she had challenged him. Perhaps she had.
“I’m not afraid of you.”
“You should be,” he said as he bit down on a nipple, sending a pain through her that morphed to pleasure as he lifted her left leg, and thrust his cock into her.
Heaven. Sheer heaven, having him move inside of her, filling her. This was as close as she’d ever get to him, the most she could hope from him, with him. His thrusts were long and forceful, raw. He wanted to show her who he was, but he knew she was holding back.
“I’m not afraid of you,” she said between his hard thrusts. It was all she could do to focus on the intensity of him driving into her, feeling the tile press into her naked backside, and holding onto his shoulders for balance.
“Everyone else is,” he said as he draped her other leg around his backside. Strong hands dug into her ass, pulling her to him as he drove deeper. Her back struck the wall with each thrust. She’d be bruised in the morning, but she didn’t care. It was raw, rough, and so very Hayden. Not the Hayden he showed the world, but the Hayden below the surface, the one he was afraid to show others, because in his mind it would confirm what they thought of him, that he was a traitor, a crazy wolf, worse than feral even because his choices were his own.
The second Mila locked her ankles together, he slammed her
hard into the wall.
“My lost shifter who hides her wolf from me,” he said as he bent his knees slightly, changing the angle so he could rub against her clit with each thrust.
Waves of pleasure bolted through her, making her forget about the tender flesh of her back. “I was scared,” she said as she tried to catch her breath.
Suddenly he slowed, easing in and out of her, dragging her from the edge she’d been walking. A finger slipped into her back hole and her eyes sprang open.
“A reward for telling the truth,” he said, a wide grin on his face.
His cock was sliding in and out of her, now mirrored by his finger. The sensation back there surprised her, pleasantly so. The moan escaped her before she could catch it.
“You are a dangerous mix of temptation and sweet, sweet pleasure, my Mila.”
“You’re not too bad yourself,” she said, raking her nails done his back, scoring his flesh. They’d heal before they left the shower.
There went that eyebrow of his again and instantly she wondered if she had started something she may regret. She certainly hoped so.
Hayden pulled out of her far enough to step into the stream of water, to wash away the blood she had drawn. “You’re not afraid of me.”
There was something in the way he said that that worried her, just slightly, but she didn’t have long enough to think about it as he turned her around again, the water to her back.
“Bend over and fingertips on the floor.”
Maybe it was the growl in his voice, but she quickly did what he said. He kicked her legs apart none-too-gently, to spread them. “You’re not going to. . .”
“To what? Take you?” He walked in front of her. She raised her head to look at him. “You can leave any time.”
“What if I don’t want to?”
“Then you’re mine. Your ass, your pussy, your mouth. And I will claim every part of you, Mila.” He said as he dragged a finger down her back to her ass and spread her cheeks.
“Oh, God. . .”
He poured more soap on his hands and began massaging her ass as he spread her farther. Two fingers slipped into her and she tensed. His other hand reached around and started playing with her clit, sending waves of pleasure through her that she forgot about his fingers in her ass.
“I’m yours, Mila, he said as he slipped a third finger in. It felt so tight and yet so good, but still, his cock was larger, longer than a few fingers. She leaned forward slightly further to see between her legs which only raised her ass higher. Powerful legs stood between her as his glorious cock nestled between her ass.
He reached under her and started massaging her clit again. She needed to come so badly, but then he released her clit. Both hands settled on her hip as the tip of his cock pushed against her back hole. The sensation was too much. She wanted him inside of her already, even there. Slowly, he pushed inside her ass, stretching her as his hands held her firm, keeping her from moving.
Slow small pumping motions as he entered her, sinking in further each time.
“That’s it, sunshine. Keep taking me.”
The sensation of him stretching her, entering her, and moving in and out just a mere inch or so was so delicious she gasped. He continued distracting her with a hand on her clit as he sank deeper into her.
Finally, his balls struck her ass and he was deep inside of her. Nothing could describe how dominated and how free she felt. She was here by choice, bent over, letting him fuck her ass, because it brought him pleasure and it gave her power. She could leave at any time, but she chose to be here, to let him do as he wished.
His thumbs glided back and forth over her hips as he slowly withdrew and then pushed back in. The guttural sound coming from him, the ecstasy she heard in his voice, made her shiver. When his balls struck her ass a second time, she was lost in the feel of him inside of her. He pulled back, nearly out, which was a devastating feeling. She wanted him in her, and it didn’t matter where, as long as it was Hayden.
“Don’t stop.”
“You like this don’t you, my Mila?”
My Mila. Only Hayden could make anal sex sound so tender and innocent. He pushed into her again, this time torturously slow. She needed to feel his balls slam against her again, to know he was fully inside her and not going anywhere.
A few more thrusts and her body spasmed. One final, glorious push and his hot seed filled her. It was the ultimate submission, bent over, him claiming her and reaching his peak while holding her still and she couldn’t imagine not having him in her life. This man who loved to dominate sexually was anything but controlling. It was when he pulled out and his seed slid out of her that she understood why she was so scared to love Hayden. When Hayden found out the truth, he’d leave, and he’d take a part of her soul with him. That was why she could never tell him her secret.
* * *
HAYDEN
Hayden reached over and pulled Mila up until she turned to face him. The expression on her face was exquisite. For the first time in weeks, she looked confident and whole. And yet there was still a part of her hiding from him. He couldn’t expect everything in a day, or even a month. She had escaped a horrible relationship and letting him make love to her as he had was tremendous. He had fully expected her to run from him when he had parted her ass. There’d been no fear, no real hesitation. This woman trusted him. When was the last time anyone had trusted him so deeply, so completely? A fucking long time.
Hayden reached for her head again, to the cut above her eye. She didn’t flinch this time. “You saved me out there. At great risk to yourself.”
“He wouldn’t have killed me.”
Hayden wanted to kiss her, to hold her tight, but the memory of her body slamming Vance to save him haunted him. He’d never forget the fear he felt at seeing her charge the enforcer. The shifter could easily have killed her, despite what she believed. He’d seen supposedly sane shifters do a lot worse for less reason than jealousy and anger.
“Don’t you ever, and I mean ever, take a risk like that again.”
She lifted her chin, so utterly proud and strong, his Mila. “You don’t get to order me around, Hayden, especially when it comes to deciding for whom I risk myself. I have just as much right to protect you as you do me.”
He growled at that. He liked that she felt protective of him, but he still growled at it. He could care less if it was sexist, it wasn’t her job to protect, it was his. Let her prevail in the lab, the camp, even the damn bedroom if she wanted. Those were situations that couldn’t kill her. But up against a shifter, an enforcer no less. . . She had no business fighting, even distracting a male shifter who could easily tear her to shreds.
Hayden backed under the showerhead. She said nothing as he soaped her down, thoroughly this time.
Green eyes stared at him. “You never told me about the scars.” Her voice wavered. There was something more she wanted to say.
“Out with it, Mila. I think after what we shared, we can find the courage to ask anything we want. I’ll answer your questions the best I can.”
“You’re his brother.”
It wasn’t a question, but he understood what she was asking. “You were already frightened of white wolves when we met. I didn’t know about Vance at the time. Telling you about Drake. . . There was nothing to be gained from it, for either of us.”
“I can understand not wanting anyone to know. The shame that comes from witnessing the violence of another. Not being able to stop, to even walk away from it.”
Everything she said was absolutely correct, except she was talking from experience. She was talking about herself and Vance. “I won’t let him touch you again. No one here will.”
“Then Damien won’t—”
“Damien won’t sell you out.” And if he tried, it would be over Hayden’s dead body.
“How can you be so sure?”
“I know Damien.”
“You’ve been at odds with him lately. Tess said Damien’s been unhappy with you.�
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“Was that the word she used? Unhappy? Well, I’m sure there’s a much stronger word that she’s thinking, except Tess has this thing about strong language, so I guess ‘unhappy’ it is.”
Hayden shut the shower, wryly thinking he was glad their water came from the lake and he didn’t have to pay a water bill, but if he had, tonight with Mila would have been so worth it. As he grabbed the towel off the hook, Mila pressed her lips to his. It wasn’t a deep kiss as they’d shared earlier, but it was sweet—all Mila— and he wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.
“How did I earn that?”
“By being you.”
“I guess for that, you get to have the towel.” He wrapped it around her shoulders and gently eased her hair out until it was on the outside of the towel.
“This works out well. I can warm up, and I get to watch you strut your stuff about.”
Hayden gyrated his hips. His cock was already hard again, but it made Mila laugh. Anything that enticed her to laugh like that was definitely worth doing, no matter how foolish he felt.
He patted her ass as they headed out of the bathroom. “You’re never going to tell me, are you?” she said.
The scars. Right. “It’s not a secret. It’s just hard to talk about,” he said as he drew her to sit next to him on the bed. “Shortly after my father died, Logan took Drake in to raise him as his own. Drake was ten. I was twelve. That’s when everything changed between us. We’d been close before that, but once Logan got hold of Drake. . .”
Hayden shook his head. He never talked about this with anyone, and he never realized how hard it was. Mila put her hand on his, and that simple contact gave him the strength to continue.
“I was kept away, sent off to cousins in the distant part of our territory. I tried to return to the main part of camp but was always turned away. When I was thirteen, I almost made my way to Drake but I was caught. Logan punished me. I tried again and again over the next two years. Never reached Drake. Each time I was caught, the punishment got worse.
Hayden’s Haven Page 21
