by Jack Parker
Kim pulled away from him a little and whispered,
"What do we do?"
Robin took a deep breath. If he still couldn't face squidgy bits then this was going to be a true test of his feelings for Kim.
"I'll get one," he said.
"One what?"
"A test," Robin found himself blushing a rotten shade of beetroot, "one of those… pee things. We'll go from there."
Kim knew she looked a mess. She felt even worse than she looked. But as Robin stood up to carry out his promise she felt a little comfort for the first time since she'd made the horribly misguided decision to spend time apart from him. She stood up slowly, her stomach rolling, and stared at him.
"Rob," she whispered.
Robin looked at her.
"Hmm?"
Kim started to shake. There was a terrible fear running through her body. She leaned forward and whispered, "In answer to your question. Friend doesn't begin to cover it."
She trembled as she closed her eyes and reached for his face. The kiss she gave him was gentle and soft, not like the wild passion they'd succumbed to two weeks before but born of a closeness that she knew now was never going to go away. It made Robin's heart flip over in his chest. He reached forward and slowly stroked the side of her face.
"Whatever happens," he whispered, "I'm not going anywhere."
As he left the gravity of the situation started to sink in for him. He couldn't believe what was happening and he cursed himself for the stupidity that led them to it in the first place. But he wouldn't let her down. If the test was negative then they were going to have a hell of a lot to talk about – the worry had cut short Kim's intended period of 'space' and brought them to confess the depth of their feelings. There was no going back from that now. And if the test was positive? Well, they'd have to cross that bridge when they came to it.
Chapter Twenty-Three
Robin was the one feeling sick as he trudged to the chemist. He felt stupid, guilty and very, very scared. This was ridiculous. He couldn't possibly be in this situation, could he? How had this even started? How had any of this started? It seemed impossible. He shook his head as he tried to work out what to do. He knew how scared Kim was of losing her family. If she was pregnant then their strange relationship wasn't exactly going to be very easy to keep under wraps. What the hell would she tell Linda? "Surprise! Got a present for you…" There was a tiny part of Robin that wondered if she was even going to do that. She had asked him to be a donor not long ago. He had a feeling this wasn't what she had in mind though.
With all the times they'd ended up in the middle of bursts of passion before one or the other had run away why the hell hadn't Robin bought condoms? He supposed he just didn't think they would have the strength to go through with it. Maybe he underestimated how much he was feeling for her. That was what gave him the strength to fight his natural urges and to give in to the bond between them.
A horrible fear gripped him. Kim was so scared of losing her family that he was terrified she'd take the ultimate step to save her marriage if the test was positive. Robin didn't know how he felt about the idea of fatherhood, it was something he'd never thought about until Kim said those words half an hour earlier – "I don't think it's worked" – but the thought that she might not want to go through the pregnancy killed him inside.
His anxiety was rising. He really thought he might throw up on the pavement. Maybe he was having a sympathetic pregnancy, he wondered, then cursed himself for being so stupid.
There it was; the chemist. The massive chemist that stretched over about four floors. Where the hell was he going to locate the damn things? Her stepped inside and studied the floor plan in the entrance. 1st Floor: Family Planning.
"There was no planning, that was the problem," Robin muttered.
He felt his face go red as he even thought about buying the damn thing. Feeling like an idiot, he finally located the counter and found himself overwhelmed with tests to choose from. What the hell was he supposed to get? Did he have to pee on it too, or was that just being really stupid now? Too many brands… digital pregnancy tests? Whist was the point of that? Could you watch TV on it while you were waiting? Besides, wouldn't peeing on it destroy the electronics?
Oh god, the choice was overwhelming. And why did they have to put them right next to the condoms? Like they were taking the piss. "Ha ha, you didn't use one of these so now you have to get one of THESE!"
Feeling as though his face was about to go up in flames, he grabbed two tests and started to head to the counter then turned around and grabbed a packet of condoms too. Just in case. He told himself off for it but he had found himself thinking about the next time. What if the test was negative and they ended up in bed again? Next time he'd be prepared. Maybe he'd even go near the squidgy bits. Maybe.
That was if he survived the pregnancy test humiliation first.
"Robin?"
Shit. Shit, shit, shit. Shit, who the hell was saying his name and how was he going to hide two pregnancy tests and a box of condoms before turning around?
He looked over his shoulder and found Molly standing behind him. Of all the people. Oh god, how was he going to get rid of her?
"Uh, hi," he said quietly. He tried a strange manoeuvre as he turned around, gradually moving the tests behind his back. If only he'd grabbed a basket. He could have thrown a box of tissues on the top.
Molly was looking a little gaunt, as though she hadn't slept or eaten in weeks. The stress of Evan's trial had taken its toll and she was showing the results. It made Robin's heart ache to think of what that girl had gone through.
"I haven't seen you since Layton… the barge…" Molly said quietly.
Robin glanced down.
"I know," he said quietly, "how are you?"
Molly shrugged. She hated people asking that question.
"Robin," she began, "can I ask you something,?"
As long as it's not why I'm carrying two pregnancy tests and a box of condoms, thought Robin but he nodded.
"Of course."
"When we were on the boat I didn't understand some things," Molly said.
"Like what?"
"Like why you and Kim kept calling him Keats."
Robin froze. Shit. He took a deep breath.
"It was his nickname," he lied, "like an alias so people didn't know it was him. We knew about it from his files."
Molly didn't seem convinced. She stared at him doubtfully.
"You were talking about mum's car crash," she said. Robin flinched. He thought Molly was asleep and too far away to hear over the stinky cheesy music.
"Was I?"
Molly nodded.
"What did you mean about… sending her home?" Molly whispered.
Robin felt tears coming to his eyes. It started to grip him with anxiety. He swallowed and didn't know what to say.
"You must haven misheard," he said with a shaky voice, "I didn't say that. Must have been the noise of the radio."
Molly shook her head slowly.
"You were talking about that Gene person again too," Molly said quietly.
Robin looked away. He shook his head and said quietly,
"Molly… I'm sorry. This isn't a good time."
"Never is, is it?" Molly said crossly.
"I have to get to the counter and then get back to –" he began as his grip on one of the tests loosened and the box plopped on the floor. Shit. He wished fruitlessly that Molly hadn't noticed but the box had already caught her eye and she bent down to pick it up.
"Now you can test four days before your period is due," she read out, then looked at him and let a childish giggle escape. "And where are you due, Robin?"
"It's for a colleague at work," Robin hissed, not telling a complete lie. He snatched it back from her but sent the other items tumbling to the floor. Feeling like he was trapped in a slapstick comedy he gave a groan of frustration as Molly picked up the second test.
"Ooh, this one can test six days before your period
is due!" she taunted.
"Give me that," Robin snatched it back as she picked up the condoms.
"And I think it's a bit late for these…" Molly continued.
"Yes, thank you," Robin snapped as he grabbed them back and began to march towards the counter.
"Robin," Molly called after him.
Robin wanted to just keep on walking and ignore her but after a few paces he slowed down, glanced around and gave a sigh.
"What?"
Molly looked downcast now. The teasing was over.
"You'll have to tell me sometime, you know," she said.
Robin bit his lip. He really didn't want to have to be the one to do that.
"Bye, Molly," he said quietly.
He took his items to the counter where the shop assistant laughed at him quite openly.
"You do understand which of these items you're supposed to use first, don't you sir?" she said.
Robin scowled, blushed and wished that he could disappear through a hole in the ground.
"Yes," he said, "can you tell which of my fists I'm going to use first?"
"Temper temper," the shop assistant told him, handing him a bag with the items in.
Robin marched angrily to the exit where he set off the alarm and a burly seven-foot security guard descended upon him, emptied his purchases on the floor, loudly checked them off against his receipt and them broadcast far and wide to his colleagues,
"It's alright – It looks like the electronic tag wasn't disabled on this PREGNANCY TEST."
"This is it," Robin shook his head, "this is how I die. I survived car crashes. I survived Keats. I survived massive blood loss and a heart attack. But I am never going to survive the humiliation of this."
He'd learnt his lesson. That was it, he was never having sex again. Not with anyone. Male, female – his sexual organs would be decommissioned forever.
Just as he was crossing the road outside the chemist he saw a vaguely familiar man talking to two youths. He frowned and tried to place the face. It wasn't for a few moments that he recognised him.
"Billy Hocker," Robin hissed. The very same man who'd helped break Nailer out of prison. He couldn't believe it – the audacity of it! Immediately he started to run towards him. Billy glanced around, saw a flash of uniform and took flight.
Clutching his bag under one arm, Robin ran at speed along one side road after anther in pursuit of him. His legs took him at a fast pace, never taking his eyes off the prize. It was after a little while that he noticed the white van that seemed to be running beside him. He gave it a slight sideways glance. It was unnerving him. Something wasn't quite right here. He considered abandoning the pursuit of Billy Hocker and heading back to Kim's before letting the station know who he'd seen but before he had a chance the van drew up in front of him and two men jumped out of the back.
Before he knew what was happening, one of them had clobbered him around the head with something large and blunt and suddenly Robin, plus his tests, found themselves well on the way to visiting mister Nick Nailer, whether they wanted to or not.
Chapter Twenty-Four
The searing pain through the back of his head was the first thing Robin felt as he awoke. For a moment he wasn't sure what had happened and he wondered if he'd been on some kind of bender, but as he slowly pulled himself upright and felt round to the back of his head he found his hair damp and matted with blood. He stared at the red staining on his fingers and frowned a little, trying to work out what the hell had happened. He remembered chasing Billy, and the van that had blocked his path. He should have known Billy wouldn't be alone.
"Insurance," he mumbled as he looked around.
He seemed to be in the back of the van. There were a couple of spades, a big white sheet covering some boxes and a couple of tools. At his feet sat a chemist's bag. He groaned. Even in the middle of being kidnapped he couldn't escape the damn pregnancy tests.
He tried to get his bearings and block out the pain radiating through his head. He scrambled around in his pockets and found his mobile phone. Surprised that no one had thought to take it he assumed that he'd been thrown in the van in haste and that they hadn't had time to check his pockets. They must have assumed he wouldn't wake up yet.
With shaking hands he dialled Kim's number and waited. It rang three times before she answered it.
"Hello?"
The sound of her voice was wonderful to hear.
"Kim."
"Robin?" she sounded a little cross, "Robin, where the hell are you? I've been waiting for ages."
Robin bit his lip.
"I've had a little… set back," he cringed.
"What kind of a setback?" Kim demanded.
Robin looked around.
"Well, a big setback," he whispered.
"I knew you'd chicken out," Kim said crossly, "I knew you wouldn't get the test."
"Oh no, I got that," Robin said quietly.
"Then what's the matter? Are you on your way back?"
Robin closed his eyes a little.
"Not really," he mumbled.
"Then where are you?"
"I've been kidnaped," Robin felt extremely stupid for saying those words.
"You… what?" Kim thought he was winding her up. "Well what about my test?"
"That's kind of been kidnapped as well."
"What the hell are you talking about Rob?" she demanded.
Robin took a deep breath.
"It's Nailer's guy," he hissed, "Billy Hocker. I saw him, chased him. He wasn't alone and these guys got out a van, and…" he trailed off as he thought he heard someone talking. "Look, Kim, if I go quiet suddenly it's because I'm having to pretend to be unconscious again."
"Again?" Kim's panic began to set in, "what do you mean 'again'?"
"They knocked me out," Robin whispered.
Now he could hear her starting tro freak oout.
"What? What did they do? Where are you? Are you OK?"
"I'm OK," Robin said as he wiped a little more blood away from his head, "…ish. But I don't know where I am. Look, Kim, I'll have to cut this call. I don't know where they're taking me up they're bound to come and get me soon. Please, please let the station know I need help. I'll try to keep my phone with me."
"Stick it in your underpants?" Kim suggested.
At first Robin thought she was insulting him but then realised that was probably the one place they weren't going to look.
"Good idea," he said, "Kim… I'll be in touch if I can."
"Rob?" her voice sounded tearful, "Pleased… please be careful?"
Robin felt a little choked up.
"I will," he whispered. There was something else he wanted to end the call with but he didn't think this was a good time to say it so instead he hung up and slipped the phone carefully inside his pants. "God, I hope this thing's not on vibrate." That would have been a fine thing to explain away.
He laid lack and closed his eyes, doing his best impression of an unconscious person. He didn't know what the hell was going to happen next, only that he had to survive this intact. Where once he'd have done anything to cross to Simon now he felt torn right down the middle. He couldn't stand the thought of being taken away from Kim and wanted to stay right where he was, and that involved staying safe.
* * *
Just as her sickness had started to abate so nausea of another kind started to plague Kim. Sickness of worry. She'd thought Robin's call was a wind-up at first. Now she would have done anything to hear the words 'April fool' or 'got you'.
The anxiety that gripped her was immense. She couldn't remember ever being so scared by another person's safety.
"Come on, Rob," she whispered as she tried to pull herself together, "you've got to make it through this. You've got to be safe."
She didn't know what to do first. She had no idea. Call the station? Go there in person? Head out on the street on a fruitless trail for him? She tried to calm herself down a little as she took a deep breath. Her worrying was getting her nowh
ere.
Eventually she made a call to DI March and then set off as fast as possible to the station, trying to fight back tears that were growing with every moment that passed. Her stomach was in knots and she had a strange feeling inside her, something she'd never really felt before. It was that feeling that knowing if someone close to her lost their life then she wouldn't want to keep living herself.
She arrived at the station to find Robin's picture plastered all over the whiteboard with arrows drawn all over the pace. March glanced up as she walked in.
"DC Stringer," he began, "have you got your projectile vomiting under control?"
Kim flinched. She'd called in sick that morning and given March a very verbal demonstration of the issue while on the phone. She was sure he hadn't needed to hear that.
"As long as no one reminds me about it," she whispered.
March looked at her. Her skim was so pale and her eyes sunken. She looked a bit like a corpse.
"Well, sit at the back and you can make a dash for the doors if you need to," he said, "told you not to eat at McDonalds."
Kim rolled her eyes and sank into a chair. She couldn't think about anything but Robin. Was he even still alive?
"DC Stringer received the call from Chief Inspector Thomas at eleven thirty three this morning," he told his team, "we're getting his phone records from the phone company and hopefully we can get a trace on where his phone is now. We have to bear in mind that they are likely to find and remove the phone though."
"Not if they don't look down there," mumbled Kim.
"He took chase after Billy Hocker outside the large chemist's in the high street this morning. CCTV footage confirms Hocker talking to two youths. We are pulling stills of the men who have abducted him. We do have the footage of his abduction."
To Kim's horror, DI March played a recording of Robin's head being smashed by a large plank of wood and his body dropping limply to the ground. She hadn't been expecting it for some reason and it caused her to react in a way that she hadn't anticipated, a gasp and a cry coming from her throat. Her colleagues turned to look at her, staring and mocking her slightly.
